school says granddaughter too fat
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Me I'd tell them to mind their own freaking business and they better not ever say it to her or there would be hell to pay. Some schools just hire someone to play nurse, they aren't even real nurses. I had to go off on them before saying my kid had lice when it was dandruff. I went up there and chewed her out and told if she didn't know the difference between lice and dandruff then I could show her but if she ever had my kid sit in her office all day again for nothing then I'd be sure to see her fired from her job. The REAL nurse called me that afternoon and apologized for the incompetence of the other "nurse". She said she would not allow her to check heads again. Don't let them get away with it, if you do then it will happen to some other little girl who may already have self esteem issues. Stupid people.
Children and their well being are a schools "freaking" business and it's folks like you that make our lives hell. Why not support your schools that are educating your loved ones instead of berating them. Or even better--homeschool if public education is so bad! Sheesh.0 -
LOL @ AngryDiet. :laugh:0
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I would take her to a doctor's office. Make sure there is no concern, then ask that the doctor write a letter to the school nurse and the negative impact of misdiagnosis such as this. I.E. poor self esteem, eating disorders etc that could be caused by doing this.0
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Me I'd tell them to mind their own freaking business and they better not ever say it to her or there would be hell to pay. Some schools just hire someone to play nurse, they aren't even real nurses. I had to go off on them before saying my kid had lice when it was dandruff. I went up there and chewed her out and told if she didn't know the difference between lice and dandruff then I could show her but if she ever had my kid sit in her office all day again for nothing then I'd be sure to see her fired from her job. The REAL nurse called me that afternoon and apologized for the incompetence of the other "nurse". She said she would not allow her to check heads again. Don't let them get away with it, if you do then it will happen to some other little girl who may already have self esteem issues. Stupid people.
Children and their well being are a schools "freaking" business and it's folks like you that make our lives hell. Why not support your schools that are educating your loved ones instead of berating them. Or even better--homeschool if public education is so bad! Sheesh.
Um. No. It's not. A school's chief concern should be education and making sure the kids aren't bullied by each other. A parent's chief concern should be taking care of a child's well being (mentally, emotionally and physically) and making sure their school isn't messing their kid up.0 -
So are we better off not cooperating with those whose main job is to educate?Me I'd tell them to mind their own freaking business and they better not ever say it to her or there would be hell to pay. Some schools just hire someone to play nurse, they aren't even real nurses. I had to go off on them before saying my kid had lice when it was dandruff. I went up there and chewed her out and told if she didn't know the difference between lice and dandruff then I could show her but if she ever had my kid sit in her office all day again for nothing then I'd be sure to see her fired from her job. The REAL nurse called me that afternoon and apologized for the incompetence of the other "nurse". She said she would not allow her to check heads again. Don't let them get away with it, if you do then it will happen to some other little girl who may already have self esteem issues. Stupid people.
Children and their well being are a schools "freaking" business and it's folks like you that make our lives hell. Why not support your schools that are educating your loved ones instead of berating them. Or even better--homeschool if public education is so bad! Sheesh.
Um. No. It's not. A school's chief concern should be education and making sure the kids aren't bullied by each other. A parent's chief concern should be taking care of a child's well being (mentally, emotionally and physically) and making sure their school isn't messing their kid up.0 -
You have a major obesity problem in the US. You're going to see more and more of this kind of thing until the trend reverses and everyone is getting skinnier. Take note of what was said, take the kid to your Doctor and have them give their opinion and deal with it from there.0
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Check with her doctor. As with adults a muscular person can weigh more than the charts recommend and still be healthy. Also ask questions -- what numbers did they use to make this determination? height? age? body fat percentage?
As you know, it is important to bring up children with healthy bodies and attitudes toward food. Too many people started life-long obsessions as a result of childhood (mis)guidance. Also consider how long she's been at the weight and height -- children sometimes pack on weight just before they have a growth spurt.0 -
So are we better off not cooperating with those whose main job is to educate?
Since were schools left in charge of teaching kids how to eat properly? Seriously. Parents should be teaching their kids this stuff.0 -
So are we better off not cooperating with those whose main job is to educate?
Since were schools left in charge of teaching kids how to eat properly? Seriously. Parents should be teaching their kids this stuff.
They should but they aren't. Stop feeding the kid junk food.0 -
I don't understand why this would be taken as a personal attack. If your on top of your child's health and medical needs, why is saying 'We are working with her doctor to watch her development.' such a difficult thing to do?
Here's the hard truth...some kids don't have parents or grandparents looking out for them. Those are the children this program is aimed at. My school told my mother I was too fat when I was little, and I went to school in the early 90s. They were trying to help me and improve my life. I didn't take it as a personal attack, and I WAS obese. My life SUCKED because I was so heavy.
I'm not angry or anything I just don't understand why the school being concerned which your child's health (When they spend half their time there) is such a bad thing?
They didn't threaten to suspend her if she has a twinkie did they?0 -
Nutrition and fitness classes?
Since were schools left in charge of teaching kids how to eat properly? Seriously. Parents should be teaching their kids this stuff.0 -
Im so thankful i homeschool- no worry about any of this!0
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I was curious and did her BMI and it says she is in the normal range so no worries!!!!0
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I think you should tell the school that you will go by your (the child's) pediatrician's recommendations, and have the child checked by her pediatrician, letting the pediatrician know what the school said. While it's true that there is a lot of variability and that the family knows the child better than the school, the flip side is as we all know obesity is a huge (no pun intended) and growing health problem in our society and the problem begins for most people in early childhood. So- it's best to be sure. Check with the pediatrician.
I think this response was well put. It is also very difficult to objectively judge things like healthy weight in people that we love.
For those who think this is out of line for a school nurse -- schools screen children for eyesight and vision problems, and check them for lice; how is this so different?
I have to agree. I know it seems intrusive for the school to do this, but at only 36 inches tall, 44 pounds is off the charts for her age. Children this age do not usually have a weight this high. She might have a hormonal issue, or just is being fed too much. It is hard to see it in our own children sometimes, so when a school nurse brings this to your attention, you really shouldn't just brush it off. I would agree with those suggesting a visit to the pediatrician. Ruling out any medical problems, and changing some health habits now, will help your granddaughter to not become morbidly obese at a young age. Trust me, when she gets a bit older, the teasing from kids can be brutal. Better to get a handle on it now. I find it so sad to see 14 yr olds today weighing 250-300 pounds and having diabetes. People wonder how they got to that point. It is because no one addressed it when they were younger and taught them good eating and exercise habits. You can be a hero to this little girl by saving her from a very unhealthy lifestyle later on. Best wishes for you both.0 -
This is a very interesting situation. I am overweight and have been for a mojority of my life. Since becoming a parent I have limited the amount of unhealthy snacks around the home and yet when my daughter was weighed by her doctor last, in Aug. 2011 when she was 5 yrs old, she was above the height and weight ranges for her age.That was no surprise as she's been there since her 6 week checkup. She's now 6 yrs old, 3'10" tall and 79 lbs. Yes she's way over her weight range but I'm not overly concerned as she's always been an active child. She's also a strong child. At 2 she was lifting her tricycle because she couldn't pedal and keep up with her cousin, so she would lift it and walk around with it. It was solidly built and by no means light, just like my daughter. At 3, she was bigger than the 5 yr olds at the kindergarten I signed her up at. At 4 her cousin, who's 3 yrs older, started borrowing her clothes and still does from time to time. At 5, I was tired and worn out and she had energy to burn, getting her to bed was the beginning of a new war every night. I signed her up for martial arts classes in Aug. 2012 to up her activity level and hopefully have it easier when it came to bedtime. Weightloss was far from my mind then but it would be a bonus if she did lose some weight though. I try my best to pay closer attention to what I give her to eat as well as how much I give her to eat and to ensure that she is active, at least on evenings. She can do push ups (more than I can) and situps (with someone holding her feet). She loves to run on the treadmill and ride her bike for hours, if I left it up to her. The point I am making is this, yes there are problems with childhood obesity but every child is different and focusing only on weight and height and not bothering to factor in strength, stamina and activity levels is very narrowminded. Fitness includes all those factors. A healthy lifestyle focuses on fitness and diet. If your granddaughter is active (always running, jumping, skipping/hopping or does some sport), healthy (doesn't get sick often) and eats properly (doesn't need a lot of encouraging when it comes to eating fruits and veggies) then I wouldn't worry about the note so much. You know her medical history, use that as your guide as to what you should do next.0
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Nutrition and fitness classes?
Since were schools left in charge of teaching kids how to eat properly? Seriously. Parents should be teaching their kids this stuff.
I didn't have either of those at this girls age. I mean, we had 'gym' but they didn't EXPLAIN anything to us. They just had us run around and jump and play. *shrug* Nutrition? They had us read the food pyramid once. That was it. School has changed since I was a kid. That's for darn sure.0 -
My 4 year old granddaughter came home from school with a letter from the school nurse saying she was" obese". She wanted a home visit to discuss proper nutriction and calorie control.
This child weighs 44 pounds is 3 foot tall. She has no protruding stomach, her butt is normal looking. She has normal looking arms, no excess chub, her face is thin and her neck is thin. She wears normal size childrens clothing sizes with ease. She looks like a normal size little girl with no weight issue. (believe me we watch closely for the kids to not go down our road). But this little girl is solid, she doesn't look it but pick her up and you feel it.
The school is basing their opinion on the scale and not the body. What do you think of this?
I would ignore it. I think it's upsetting to hear things like this, and at that age I don't think it's appropriate.
I just had a look in my daughter's red book (not sure if you are in the UK?) and the weight chart in there says she is fine for her age. She's at the top of the centiles, but not above them.
My 3 year old son is the opposite. He is 3 foot 4 and 36lbs, so 98th centile for height and below 50th for weight.
Personally I wouldn't worry about it and just keep on as you are. Kids tend to get taller and thinner.0 -
I was curious and did her BMI and it says she is in the normal range so no worries!!!!
Not sure where you got your information. I also checked using the BMI for children and it was 23.9 which places her in the obese category and in the 99th percentile for weight.0 -
I'm a teacher and the school that I work at sends these notes home. The school does dental, vision, hearing, and weight screenings. I think it's provided more for parents who can't afford/don't take their kids to the doctor or just have no knowledge of good health. Sad but true. If you don't agree with it, throw it away and tell the school you're not interested. The screenings are typically done for the entire school or by grade levels, so really your child isn't being singled out. It's just another service that schools are expected to provide, because unfortunately for some parents (NOT ALL!) we are the ones that are supposed to raise the kids.0
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I'm a teacher and the school that I work at sends these notes home. The school does dental, vision, hearing, and weight screenings. I think it's provided more for parents who can't afford/don't take their kids to the doctor or just have no knowledge of good health. Sad but true. If you don't agree with it, throw it away and tell the school you're not interested. The screenings are typically done for the entire school or by grade levels, so really your child isn't being singled out. It's just another service that schools are expected to provide, because unfortunately for some parents (NOT ALL!) we are the ones that are supposed to raise the kids.
That really is so, so unfortunate.
*shakes head*
I wonder when the ING got taken out of the parent.0 -
I'd send them a thank you for your concern "note". I would also include, "I appreciate your concern for the kids health. Of course you must also be doing this with all of your teachers and staff, right?"..............Oh no wait, that would be discrimination and illegal- yet its ok to send a note for a child.
Not against the schools supporting fit kids- but this is not the way to achieve it- also, tear down a childs self worth and moral, it can take years to recover. Schools get off your lazy butts and fix the nutrition issues in cafeteria, and then get off your butts and get these kids moving in school (this OP has nothing to do with your little one).
I teach Zumbatomic- this kids version of Zumba. Its fun, silly and a great program. There are programs to get kids more fit if that is a problem- but, the pot calling the kettle obese........is crap!!
I'm not sure how the meals are in your schools cafeterias but in the one I work in, they do try to give kids healthier choices such as baking instead of frying, salad, fruit, etc. The problem that most people complain about are the calorie counts of lunches. Yes, they are between 1000-1400, however, they are that way because for many children in my district it is the only meal they will get that day. That's why the meals have a higher calorie count. If we decide the meals calories should be based on three meals a day and cut them to 500-600 then some of these children will not get a sufficient caloric intake. I understand that it is not the schools responsibility but in the area of education we worry about our children ALL of the time, not just when they are with us.0 -
I got a letter about my son from his school (although I'm in the UK).. it says that he is "borderline overweight".
Now, I can see his ribs, I can see muscle definition in his arms and thighs already. The letter went right where it was supposed to go - in the bin.
Sometimes, yes.. those school letters can be a wakeup call for your child even if you think you're doing everything you should be doing. But for the most part, they're inaccurate and going off measurements that are meant for those over 10.
If they're eating right 80% of the time, and are active enough outside the home (and inside sometimes :P), then I really don't see an issue until they are starting puberty - when the hormones kick in, that's when the children could do with being weighed and monitored. But again, not obsessively. To put focus on weight at an early age gives the children a complex that they could well do without. I'd rather they didn't weigh the children at all, but give classes on nutrition and exercise. That's a better thing to do.0 -
I was curious and did her BMI and it says she is in the normal range so no worries!!!!
Did you use a BMI calculator for adults, or for children? Using a child's BMI calculator, these are the results-
Results
Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 23.9 , placing the BMI-for-age above the 99th percentile for girls aged 4 years 0 months. This child is obese and is likely to have health-related problems because of weight and should be seen by a healthcare provider for further assessment.0 -
I'm a teacher and I've never heard of this.
Why are they weighing her? I'd call the principal and inquire about this and ask for some sort of rule or law that says the nurse can screen kids for that. Really, schools around me can't screen for ANYTHING unless the parents sign for it. And sending a letter home about obesity is a screening.
Referrals and IEP reports are the main duties of a school nurse. (I also work in a school) I'd guess she's an RN doing part of her job- a discussion is not a big deal- she's doing her job and trying to help, and a lot of families don't have the resources or knowledge, and would appreciate the support. The family always has a right to say no. No need to get indignant.
Yeah, but isn't this against HIPAA laws? You need the parents permission to do screening. Just like the person said, the parent has the right to say NO, therefore they should have knowledge about what is going on with their health care no matter where. If they don't send the information out about the screening, then the parents aren't saying "yes" either, but the school seems to think that is the implication. If you see any indignant behavior, it is justified.0 -
I doubt a Professional is saying something just to cause you ire! Clearly they believe they are identifying something of note. Put the child first and AT LEAST talk to your GP, rather than wasting time venting your spleen on this website. If the GP says all is ok then great! If he says you have cause to worry, then buy the school medic a huge bunch of flowers! Doh!0
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I have always had issues with schools. The bottom line is that those BMI charts are outdated and even doctors don't get much nutritional schooling. Take a look around the internet and you will find 10 different sites each backed with observation and research that say 10 different things on nutrition and well balanced eating.
I noticed in the original post that grandma says the child wears normal sized clothing for her age, has no visible fat, just that she is heavy. What else do you need to go by? Taking the child to the DR is ok, but as I mentioned they don't have a lot of schooling in nutrition and they also tend to go by those out of date charts. No two kids are the same, and if they eat healthy and look healthy their weight shouldn't be a concern.
Personally I think asking for a home visit is intrusive and not needed at all. If anything, the nurse should have requested a conference and offered a home visit if the grandma/parent couldn't attend, or even a phone call. Why do they have to come visit the home? It almost sounds like intimidation or a fishing expedition.0 -
I'm a teacher and the school that I work at sends these notes home. The school does dental, vision, hearing, and weight screenings. I think it's provided more for parents who can't afford/don't take their kids to the doctor or just have no knowledge of good health. Sad but true. If you don't agree with it, throw it away and tell the school you're not interested. The screenings are typically done for the entire school or by grade levels, so really your child isn't being singled out. It's just another service that schools are expected to provide, because unfortunately for some parents (NOT ALL!) we are the ones that are supposed to raise the kids.
That really is so, so unfortunate.
*shakes head*
I wonder when the ING got taken out of the parent.
It really is! We have some absolutely amazing parents that take wonderful care of their children. Then there are those that you wonder how long it's been since they have bathed their kids. Last year, after the dental screenings, the kids each got a tooth brush. One little girl was so excited to get one. I asked her if she had one at home and she said no that her dad couldn't afford it (????!!!!!). The screenings are supposed to be beneficial. I know they can be kind of harsh, because they just say the information, the don't beat around the bush. I agree with the others, take your granddaughter to the doctor. Get her looked over...what harm could it cause? These screenings really aren't meant to be offensive, just to provide facts about your child's health.0 -
No, according to the same CDC site that says the granddaughter is at the 99th percentile, your son is at about the 82nd percentile and a healthy weight. (Although I did have to say he's 24 months, since they won't calculate for under 2 years old. That calculator takes age and height into account.)
My son is a beast then! He was just at the doctors and is already at 35 1/2 inches and 32.3 pounds..... Hes not even 2 yet (just hit 22months)
With that being sad, I know my son is tall (and weighs a lot for his age) but every child is different. I was told by the nutritionist and his doctor that yes it is important to monitor weight/height, but not to really worry until the child reaches about 6-7yrs old.
I would be very upset to know know that instead of teaching my son his abc's and 123's they are throwing him on a scale trying to figure out who's "obese" or not in class.
Yes, these numbers can be off for a variety of reasons. (And we don't have the exact numbers for the granddaughter, at that size and age, amounts that seem like small differences for an adult can be important.) It's possible that a child who is at either of the extreme ends of the chart, is still healthy, but it's certainly worth checking out.0 -
Exactly! It will be a cold day in hell when I take advice about the health and well being of my child from strangers on the Internet over a licensed medical professional.I doubt a Professional is saying something just to cause you ire! Clearly they believe they are identifying something of note. Put the child first and AT LEAST talk to your GP, rather than wasting time venting your spleen on this website. If the GP says all is ok then great! If he says you have cause to worry, then buy the school medic a huge bunch of flowers! Doh!0
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Schools now days try to control all things in a childs life! I say with her next checkup at the Dr ask for his opinion and tell the school nurse when she goes back to school and gets her MD or degree in nutrition that you will hear her out! That is coming from a RN!0
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