school says granddaughter too fat

lovelyladyJ21

This is how some eating disorders get started!!


They say my son is obese he's 2 is 36 inches and weights 33.51 lbs. I'm sorry but if he lost the 5-10 lbs they think he should there would be nothing left of him!!


EVERYONE'S body is built differently but they don't take that into consideration.

But I would also be ALL for the home visit; just look at it as a learning experience. I'm all for learning more about nutrition and providing healthy meals for my family. Plus you don't have to pay for it!

leeleeloulou

i agree that the school should be aware of this and keep in contact with parents. BUT BMI is not the only thing to go on. Things like, does the child look healthy? are they able to partake in sports activities with ease?
I wouldn't worry too much about it now. Just keep an eye on your granddaughter, and explain to the school that you have changed the children's eating habits in line with your healthy regime now anyway. The can't say fairer than that.
Best of luck
Leah xxxxx

IronSmasher

This is up there, with one of the most terrifying threads I've ever read.

Fozzi43

My sons best friend is a gymnast, he's 10 and pure muscle, in fact he's in the top 5 of under twelves class in Britain.

She got the same kind of letter : /

DrBorkBork

singling out a 4 year old. 44 LBS at 3 feet I don't consider that obese. I see kids everyday who weigh twice that.

I HIGHLY doubt you've seen a 88 lb, 3ft 4 year old and didn't think they weren't morbidly obese

I was almost 100 lbs at 5 y/o, but did not look at all obese. Just tall with good bone.

How tall were you?

I dunno. Maybe an inch or two taller than my class mates from my school pictures. By 10 years old I was 150 lbs, but definitely obese by then. I hit my growth spurt around that time and was the tallest 5th grader in my school, but I've been 5'5.5" since then. I remember getting to 6th grade after many of my friends hit their growth spurts and thinking "WTH?" suddenly I was the shortest.

vim_n_vigor

I don't see anything wrong with this. They aren't telling the child they are obese. They are offering assistance to the family. It may or may not be an issue. Individual circumstances will tell. I saw a few posts here saying how some other posters were that size at that age and that was ok. It wasn't until they were a few years older that they were obese. Um, OK, yeah. The statistics showed at the younger age that you were at risk, and you were. Before anyone asks, yes, I do have 2 children ages 4 and 6. I know that a lot more needs to be looked at then just the height and weight. Activity level, actual diets, how much sleep the child gets are just a few of the inputs that should be evaluated. Sorry, but at that height, that is a lot of weight to carry. Did they weigh with shoes on? Like others have said, that extra few pounds can skew the evaluation. My 6 year old boy is just at 40 pounds now.

leeleeloulou

I don't see anything wrong with this. They aren't telling the child they are obese. They are offering assistance to the family. It may or may not be an issue. Individual circumstances will tell. I saw a few posts here saying how some other posters were that size at that age and that was ok. It wasn't until they were a few years older that they were obese. Um, OK, yeah. The statistics showed at the younger age that you were at risk, and you were. Before anyone asks, yes, I do have 2 children ages 4 and 6. I know that a lot more needs to be looked at then just the height and weight. Activity level, actual diets, how much sleep the child gets are just a few of the inputs that should be evaluated. Sorry, but at that height, that is a lot of weight to carry. Did they weigh with shoes on? Like others have said, that extra few pounds can skew the evaluation. My 6 year old boy is just at 40 pounds now.

the first post does actually say that the school think she's obese xx

sunkissedrn19

I actually have to disagree with most of you. I think that it is great that someone is showing some concern. It is too easy to not be realistic when it is about someone we love. I think that it is great that they are offering assistance and education. Our children are getting bigger and bigger. I am a nurse and 90% of the children I see are overweight. I mean 10 year olds weighing 125+ lbs. Children are not typically outside playing like in the past. Now its all about video games and technology. Families are also "busier" and that typically means fast food. We need help as a nation.

vim_n_vigor

I don't see anything wrong with this. They aren't telling the child they are obese. They are offering assistance to the family. It may or may not be an issue. Individual circumstances will tell. I saw a few posts here saying how some other posters were that size at that age and that was ok. It wasn't until they were a few years older that they were obese. Um, OK, yeah. The statistics showed at the younger age that you were at risk, and you were. Before anyone asks, yes, I do have 2 children ages 4 and 6. I know that a lot more needs to be looked at then just the height and weight. Activity level, actual diets, how much sleep the child gets are just a few of the inputs that should be evaluated. Sorry, but at that height, that is a lot of weight to carry. Did they weigh with shoes on? Like others have said, that extra few pounds can skew the evaluation. My 6 year old boy is just at 40 pounds now.

the first post does actually say that the school think she's obese xx

By medical standards she is. The school told the parents, not the child.

Gwen_B

I used an online calculator an it indicated she was: A 4 year old (female) child who is 44 pounds and is 3 feet tall has a body mass index of 23.9, which is over the 95th percentile, and would indicate that your child is overweight.
http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/growthcharts2/l/bl_ibw_rslts.htm?gender=2&age=4&months=0&feet=3&inches=0&inches_percent=0&pounds_100=NaN&pounds_10=NaN&pounds=NaN&pounds_percent=NaN&pounds_100=0&pounds_10=40&pounds=4&pounds_percent=0&page=5

Gwen_B

singling out a 4 year old. 44 LBS at 3 feet I don't consider that obese. I see kids everyday who weigh twice that.

I HIGHLY doubt you've seen a 88 lb, 3ft 4 year old and didn't think they weren't morbidly obese

I was almost 100 lbs at 5 y/o, but did not look at all obese. Just tall with good bone.

Really? My 15 year old is 58" and barely over a 100 pounds. And my 9 year old son is almost 5 feet tall and 75 pounds I think you would notice a major difference in a 100 pound 5 year old!

shannonmci

Wonder if we work at the same place Waskier

AmberJo1984

I personally feel this is rediculous. I do not think it is the school's place to discuss weight.... or bring up "home visits". Talk to your granddaughter's pediatrition. It will be his/ her concern. Not the teachers.

kiachu

singling out a 4 year old. 44 LBS at 3 feet I don't consider that obese. I see kids everyday who weigh twice that.

I HIGHLY doubt you've seen a 88 lb, 3ft 4 year old and didn't think they weren't morbidly obese

I was almost 100 lbs at 5 y/o, but did not look at all obese. Just tall with good bone.

How tall were you?

I dunno. Maybe an inch or two taller than my class mates from my school pictures. By 10 years old I was 150 lbs, but definitely obese by then. I hit my growth spurt around that time and was the tallest 5th grader in my school, but I've been 5'5.5" since then. I remember getting to 6th grade after many of my friends hit their growth spurts and thinking "WTH?" suddenly I was the shortest.

Okay but just to put things in perspective there is no way, except with a possible disorder, should a 5 year old be tall or muscular enough, or have the bone density to weigh 100lbs. You surely were obese, and looked it, and unfortunately no one intervene early enough and now your dealing with the effects of that.

But people didnt know back then what they do know. Fat children were seen as healthy children.

My daughter is the opposite, she has always been underweight, barely on the growth charts for weight, fell completely, not healthy either.

Robin_Bin

...I was genuinely shocked that people aren't able to use their visuals to establish whether someone (of any age) is roughly a 'healthy weight' or not ...

You may be shocked by it, but someone else posted a few articles about research on this topic. The research found that many people don't recognize their overweight or even obese children as having a weight problem. See
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-12226744
http://www.smh.com.au/national/health/parents-blind-to-early-obesity-in-children--report-20121001-26vge.html
http://www.foodmag.com.au/news/parents-unable-to-recognise-when-children-are-obes
With approximately 20% of children being overweight (see articles above and http://www.cnpp.usda.gov/Publications/NutritionInsights/insight13.pdf), and so many overweight adults, it's not really so surprising to me that many people have distorted perceptions of what a healthy weight looks like.

foodfathought

I'm sorry, but I have to go against the grain here.

44lbs for a 3ft child -is- quite a lot (to put it in perspective, the average weight for a girl of 3ft 8inches is 40lbs - that's 8inches taller than OP's grandchild, and 4lbs LIGHTER). The average child will not be particularly muscular.

OP: I believe the school are probably just trying to help, and on paper, maybe the child does need to check in with her own doctor. If nothing else, to check that there is nothing medically wrong that is causing her to weigh more than the average weight for her height.

As long as this is communicated clearly and sensitively with the child, there shouldn't be an issue. The child doesn't even need to know that he or she has a possible weight issue, because it's whoever cares for her that probably needs the educating regarding nutrition (as I presume the child, at 3ft, is probably about 4 or 5years old?)

Doodlewhopper

I am dumbfounded by the number of morbidly obese posters that are offended or shocked by the school taking an active role in educating not only the child, but the family, in proper nutrition. This should be a great thing! I wish we could have far more honest conversations about what it is to be healthy. Do those of you opposed to this approach really want this poor kid to have to go through what we are dealing with? Overweight, unhealthy, dissatisfied and trying to figure it out as adults? Maybe if we had access to proper education in nutrition as a child we all wouldn't be on here tracking our calories and exercise like fiends to achieve a healthy weight.

My employer is actively promoting healthy lifestyles. They had us take health tests and fill out surveys to evaluate our lifestyles early this year. Several months ago I received a phone call from a company-paid Health Coach. They were calling to review my goals and help encourage and educate me in ways to meet them. They call me every month, during company hours, to check in. Is it my company's business? No. Do I appreciate it their concern, even though it can be a bit self-serving? Hell yes! I am running my first marathon a week from Sunday. Is it because of them? No. Did they help keep me on track? Yes. And to top it off, they sent me an email last week congratulating me on my success and notifying me that they were sending me $100 as a thank you for participating and maintaining my focus!

We should all be so lucky to have an employer or school that takes an interest in our overall health. I say good for the nurse and good for the family. You are being given an opportunity to help your child. Take advantage of it and do everything you can so that your grandchild doesn't become one of us, fat and trying to figure out how to change our lifestyle as adults.

<<<I am dumbfounded by the number of morbidly obese posters that are offended or shocked by the school taking an active role in educating not only the child, but the family, in proper nutrition. >>>

That's not the issue that many are upset about. It is the intrusive nature of the home visit. I do agree that our children's health should be monitored at school and parents notified of the results. (good and bad)

As a tax payer, as a parent, and as a free American I have problems with the government's approach. You should be too. Our tax dollars are being misused.

The original purpose of the government was to administer the business of the country, not administer the behavior of the people. Americans were once free citizens; now they are mere subjects to the whims of the bureaucrats.

FlaxMilk

That's not the issue that many are upset about. It is the intrusive nature of the home visit. I do agree that our children's health should be monitored at school and parents notified of the results. (good and bad)

I know I'm repeating myself now, but unless the school insisted on a home visit, which they can't do, it's not intrusive. It's an offer of a service. I don't think people have any idea how popular and common home visits are now. There are many parents that will choose different medical service agencies for their children based solely on whether or not they can get home visits. People ask for them all the time.

The other person who described how helpful they were in her life said it best, really.

Doodlewhopper

That's not the issue that many are upset about. It is the intrusive nature of the home visit. I do agree that our children's health should be monitored at school and parents notified of the results. (good and bad)

I know I'm repeating myself now, but unless the school insisted on a home visit, which they can't do, it's not intrusive. It's an offer of a service. I don't think people have any idea how popular and common home visits are now. There are many parents that will choose different medical service agencies for their children based solely on whether or not they can get home visits. People ask for them all the time.

The other person who described how helpful they were in her life said it best, really.

Quit repeating yourself and pay attention. No matter how you want to re-define it, no matter how you want to package it, no matter how "good" you claim it is, the government is intruding in personal affairs - and that is not the purpose of the government.

FlaxMilk

Quit repeating yourself and pay attention. No matter how you want to re-define it, no matter how you want to package it, no matter how "good" you claim it is, the government is intruding in personal affairs - and that is not the purpose of the government.

I'll drop it, but I'm not sure how you can support the school monitoring weight and notifying parents based on your above statement. A home visit is no different than a school meeting. Both can be accepted or declined. It's an invitation to provide family based education. If people don't want it or need it, they can say no. Think of it as a free sample at the mall. Someone will offer it to you, but you can just walk on by. I'm a vegan, but I don't get offended when someone offers me pork from their restaurant, because how do they know if I'm a vegan or someone who would be thrilled with the offer of some sweet and sour?

It's one argument to say that the government shouldn't get involved, but the argument breaks down when it's ok for them to get involved by monitoring but not offering (offering, not mandating), help.

I don't need to package it any which way, by the way. Many parents love it. Those that don't decline it. I myself wouldn't want people in my home, so I'd say no and go up to the school. But the reason these are offered is demand and need. A lot of people just miss appointments now, for many reasons, but are more likely to keep them if someone comes to them. When the pizza shop asks take out or delivery, they are asking, "Do you want this convenience?" not "I'd love to scope out your home and butt into your private affairs." Same thing here. Assuming it's warm enough, someone could insist the nurse come no further than the front porch and never let them see the inside. It's in the parents' control.

Susanthecatwhisperer

I'd take it up with the kid's DOCTOR! If the child isn't obese, the nurse needs to be informed, or go work somewhere else.

neverstray

I have noticed that most people have a skewed view of what obese really is. Many of my neighbors have told me that they think they are in pretty good shape. I look at their bellies hanging over their pants and wonder where they get that idea. Women too.

To evaluate it properly, have the doctor take a look and tell you one way or the other. There are lots of information on the web that will tell you also, based on her age, height, and weight, whether she is in the range for obesity or not. But, there is something to the body type and all that that has to be considered. A body builder will be obese by the pure numbers, but looking at them, you can see they are not obese. By the same token, there are other factors. I would take her to the doctor and just ask and find out HOW obese she is or isn't. Maybe it's just moderate and you need to regulate her diet a little bit. for a kid, it's retty easy to create a small deficit that they will hardly notice. And, it's also easy, or pretty easy, at least with my kids, to get them moving more. It usually takes effort on your part.

ironanimal

That's not the issue that many are upset about. It is the intrusive nature of the home visit. I do agree that our children's health should be monitored at school and parents notified of the results. (good and bad)

I know I'm repeating myself now, but unless the school insisted on a home visit, which they can't do, it's not intrusive. It's an offer of a service. I don't think people have any idea how popular and common home visits are now. There are many parents that will choose different medical service agencies for their children based solely on whether or not they can get home visits. People ask for them all the time.

The other person who described how helpful they were in her life said it best, really.

Quit repeating yourself and pay attention. No matter how you want to re-define it, no matter how you want to package it, no matter how "good" you claim it is, the government is intruding in personal affairs - and that is not the purpose of the government.

It is when the health problem in question is costing them lots of money. If Americans could be trusted to get the obesity epidemic under control on their own, I'm sure you'd be left to it. As it stands, it's getting worse and costing the gov. more and more.

joselo2

My employer is actively promoting healthy lifestyles. They had us take health tests and fill out surveys to evaluate our lifestyles early this year. Several months ago I received a phone call from a company-paid Health Coach. They were calling to review my goals and help encourage and educate me in ways to meet them. They call me every month, during company hours, to check in. Is it my company's business? No. Do I appreciate it their concern, even though it can be a bit self-serving? Hell yes! I am running my first marathon a week from Sunday. Is it because of them? No. Did they help keep me on track? Yes. And to top it off, they sent me an email last week congratulating me on my success and notifying me that they were sending me $100 as a thank you for participating and maintaining my focus!

We should all be so lucky to have an employer or school that takes an interest in our overall health. I say good for the nurse and good for the family. You are being given an opportunity to help your child. Take advantage of it and do everything you can so that your grandchild doesn't become one of us, fat and trying to figure out how to change our lifestyle as adults.

If you are american , it is not that your employer cares one bit, it is just because they conntribute to your health care. because of socialised health care in the UK, employers dont tlk about people health much.... good news for me!! If I was in that situation, I would tell the health people that I did NOT want to engage at all in their programme. I'd rather be sacked than sit there and be patronised about my health goals. I might be making changes anayways but that is nothing to do with my employer and I wouldn't stand for it. I think my health is my business, not my jobs. Same with schools, it isn't there business, i think they need to butt out of it, and do what they are supposed to. If I hd kids and a professional wanted to come in, I would not let them come in. I think this because i am a liberal who dont think the state should be intruding in our lives and our parenting... and because i think this sort of thing is usually more harmful to children than good. I would never put up with any of that stuff.

schondell

Imagine is a high school teacher noticed a student getting thinner and thinner, along with signs of anorexia nervosa. She reports this to the school guidance councillor/nurse and the guidance councillor/nurse sends a private letter home to the parent. The teacher/school board are heroes and have helped the student.

Now what if a young obese child was getting larger and larger each year?

joselo2

Imagine is a high school teacher noticed a student getting thinner and thinner, along with signs of anorexia nervosa. She reports this to the school guidance councillor/nurse and the guidance councillor/nurse sends a private letter home to the parent. The teacher/school board are heroes and have helped the student.

Now what if a young obese child was getting larger and larger each year?

I'm so glad my school never sent any awful letters home about me, even though i did actually get bigger each year! It wouldnt have helped one bit, would have made it worse in fact.

The young person suffering anorexia is the hero for battling such a horrible thing, and their parents for supporting them. got nothing to do with the school. Clearly the parents going to notice and care before the school.

VelociMama

OP updated but posted a new thread instead of adding it here. You can follow the update here: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/803997-picture-of-4-yr-old-of-what-the-school-calls-obese