school says granddaughter too fat

tlacox1

I'd send them a thank you for your concern "note". I would also include, "I appreciate your concern for the kids health. Of course you must also be doing this with all of your teachers and staff, right?"..............Oh no wait, that would be discrimination and illegal- yet its ok to send a note for a child.

Not against the schools supporting fit kids- but this is not the way to achieve it- also, tear down a childs self worth and moral, it can take years to recover. Schools get off your lazy butts and fix the nutrition issues in cafeteria, and then get off your butts and get these kids moving in school (this OP has nothing to do with your little one).

I teach Zumbatomic- this kids version of Zumba. Its fun, silly and a great program. There are programs to get kids more fit if that is a problem- but, the pot calling the kettle obese........is crap!!

I'm not sure how the meals are in your schools cafeterias but in the one I work in, they do try to give kids healthier choices such as baking instead of frying, salad, fruit, etc. The problem that most people complain about are the calorie counts of lunches. Yes, they are between 1000-1400, however, they are that way because for many children in my district it is the only meal they will get that day. That's why the meals have a higher calorie count. If we decide the meals calories should be based on three meals a day and cut them to 500-600 then some of these children will not get a sufficient caloric intake. I understand that it is not the schools responsibility but in the area of education we worry about our children ALL of the time, not just when they are with us.

SairahRose

I got a letter about my son from his school (although I'm in the UK).. it says that he is "borderline overweight".
Now, I can see his ribs, I can see muscle definition in his arms and thighs already. The letter went right where it was supposed to go - in the bin.
Sometimes, yes.. those school letters can be a wakeup call for your child even if you think you're doing everything you should be doing. But for the most part, they're inaccurate and going off measurements that are meant for those over 10.

If they're eating right 80% of the time, and are active enough outside the home (and inside sometimes :P), then I really don't see an issue until they are starting puberty - when the hormones kick in, that's when the children could do with being weighed and monitored. But again, not obsessively. To put focus on weight at an early age gives the children a complex that they could well do without. I'd rather they didn't weigh the children at all, but give classes on nutrition and exercise. That's a better thing to do.

DebbieLyn63

I was curious and did her BMI and it says she is in the normal range so no worries!!!!

Did you use a BMI calculator for adults, or for children? Using a child's BMI calculator, these are the results-

Results


Based on the height and weight entered, the BMI is 23.9 , placing the BMI-for-age above the 99th percentile for girls aged 4 years 0 months. This child is obese and is likely to have health-related problems because of weight and should be seen by a healthcare provider for further assessment.

lwagnitz

I'm a teacher and I've never heard of this.

Why are they weighing her? I'd call the principal and inquire about this and ask for some sort of rule or law that says the nurse can screen kids for that. Really, schools around me can't screen for ANYTHING unless the parents sign for it. And sending a letter home about obesity is a screening.

Referrals and IEP reports are the main duties of a school nurse. (I also work in a school) I'd guess she's an RN doing part of her job- a discussion is not a big deal- she's doing her job and trying to help, and a lot of families don't have the resources or knowledge, and would appreciate the support. The family always has a right to say no. No need to get indignant.

Yeah, but isn't this against HIPAA laws? You need the parents permission to do screening. Just like the person said, the parent has the right to say NO, therefore they should have knowledge about what is going on with their health care no matter where. If they don't send the information out about the screening, then the parents aren't saying "yes" either, but the school seems to think that is the implication. If you see any indignant behavior, it is justified.

PNJB796

I doubt a Professional is saying something just to cause you ire! Clearly they believe they are identifying something of note. Put the child first and AT LEAST talk to your GP, rather than wasting time venting your spleen on this website. If the GP says all is ok then great! If he says you have cause to worry, then buy the school medic a huge bunch of flowers! Doh!

Goldenbast

I have always had issues with schools. The bottom line is that those BMI charts are outdated and even doctors don't get much nutritional schooling. Take a look around the internet and you will find 10 different sites each backed with observation and research that say 10 different things on nutrition and well balanced eating.

I noticed in the original post that grandma says the child wears normal sized clothing for her age, has no visible fat, just that she is heavy. What else do you need to go by? Taking the child to the DR is ok, but as I mentioned they don't have a lot of schooling in nutrition and they also tend to go by those out of date charts. No two kids are the same, and if they eat healthy and look healthy their weight shouldn't be a concern.

Personally I think asking for a home visit is intrusive and not needed at all. If anything, the nurse should have requested a conference and offered a home visit if the grandma/parent couldn't attend, or even a phone call. Why do they have to come visit the home? It almost sounds like intimidation or a fishing expedition.

sluedu09

I'm a teacher and the school that I work at sends these notes home. The school does dental, vision, hearing, and weight screenings. I think it's provided more for parents who can't afford/don't take their kids to the doctor or just have no knowledge of good health. Sad but true. If you don't agree with it, throw it away and tell the school you're not interested. The screenings are typically done for the entire school or by grade levels, so really your child isn't being singled out. It's just another service that schools are expected to provide, because unfortunately for some parents (NOT ALL!) we are the ones that are supposed to raise the kids.

That really is so, so unfortunate.

*shakes head*

I wonder when the ING got taken out of the parent.

---

It really is! We have some absolutely amazing parents that take wonderful care of their children. Then there are those that you wonder how long it's been since they have bathed their kids. Last year, after the dental screenings, the kids each got a tooth brush. One little girl was so excited to get one. I asked her if she had one at home and she said no that her dad couldn't afford it (????!!!!!). The screenings are supposed to be beneficial. I know they can be kind of harsh, because they just say the information, the don't beat around the bush. I agree with the others, take your granddaughter to the doctor. Get her looked over...what harm could it cause? These screenings really aren't meant to be offensive, just to provide facts about your child's health.

Robin_Bin

My son is a beast then! He was just at the doctors and is already at 35 1/2 inches and 32.3 pounds..... Hes not even 2 yet (just hit 22months)

With that being sad, I know my son is tall (and weighs a lot for his age) but every child is different. I was told by the nutritionist and his doctor that yes it is important to monitor weight/height, but not to really worry until the child reaches about 6-7yrs old.

I would be very upset to know know that instead of teaching my son his abc's and 123's they are throwing him on a scale trying to figure out who's "obese" or not in class.

No, according to the same CDC site that says the granddaughter is at the 99th percentile, your son is at about the 82nd percentile and a healthy weight. (Although I did have to say he's 24 months, since they won't calculate for under 2 years old. That calculator takes age and height into account.)

Yes, these numbers can be off for a variety of reasons. (And we don't have the exact numbers for the granddaughter, at that size and age, amounts that seem like small differences for an adult can be important.) It's possible that a child who is at either of the extreme ends of the chart, is still healthy, but it's certainly worth checking out.

PamelaKuz

Exactly! It will be a cold day in hell when I take advice about the health and well being of my child from strangers on the Internet over a licensed medical professional.

I doubt a Professional is saying something just to cause you ire! Clearly they believe they are identifying something of note. Put the child first and AT LEAST talk to your GP, rather than wasting time venting your spleen on this website. If the GP says all is ok then great! If he says you have cause to worry, then buy the school medic a huge bunch of flowers! Doh!

CINDYRN33

Schools now days try to control all things in a childs life! I say with her next checkup at the Dr ask for his opinion and tell the school nurse when she goes back to school and gets her MD or degree in nutrition that you will hear her out! That is coming from a RN!

myofibril

Well this is an interesting case of shoot the messenger...

MrMeowGi

How could she be 4 years old and weigh a ton while being a normal /medium size ? Doesnt sound right, either she is future body building wonder, or she has alimantium bones (wolverine) - when I was 4 I weighed like, nothing , ... this needs some attention forget what the school said, also , those who are hating on the school for weighing children , wtf at least they are showing concern for the youth ... there is no point in scolding teachers who are overweight as they are old and do not determine the future, where as the youth truly can make a difference if put on a correct path.

Robin_Bin

My 4 year old granddaughter came home from school with a letter from the school nurse saying she was" obese". She wanted a home visit to discuss proper nutriction and calorie control.

This child weighs 44 pounds is 3 foot tall.

My 2 1/2 year old weighs 40lbs and is 3'2 and he's perfectly healthy. Ignore it.

According to whom? 97th percentile, and unless there are special circumstances, these measurements calculate as obese.

chelseabuns88

I don't know anything about weight of children.. but I know from working in a nursery some kids are 'chunkier' than others, you would never think of them as 'fat' and I'm certain parents would never imagine them to be 'overweight'.. but they do carry a little extra and a little can make a big difference when you're talking in such small numbers. These children can be just as physically active and healthy and weight can vary for a number of reasons.. it's still early days! When they settle at school and have routine meals and join clubs and obviously as they grow and develop, things change!

Either way, I don't think the weight matters so much at this stage, as long as your family are encouraging healthy eating and activity, i'm sure she'll grow up healthy (that's the most important thing; not the number on the scale)

I'm not sure how I feel about the involvement of the school, it may be important to flag up these issues as I do know some families who live off of frozen dinners, takeaways and sweets and their ideas of entertaining children involve hours in front of the TV.. but generally those families don't want to listen to someone telling them about 'healthy living', old habits die hard!

MakingProgress

I think it's a good idea to have her checked out by the pediatrician and find out if there are medical concerns because of her weight. However, my son was always at the 95th percentile for both weight and height, and the doctor was never concerned ... he is now a very healthy 18 year old who is 6'5"+ and weighs 210 ... and is considered healthy and fine. My daughter was always in the 95th percentile for weight, but until she was about three years old, in the 25th percentile for height. She is now 19, 145 and 5'11" ... again, healthy weight and fine (she does have a thyroid issue, however, and once it was corrected, she had a serious growth spurt).

Sometimes, the numbers aren't accurate, but only your doctor can make that determination. Just be glad that the school nurse brought it to your attention, and get it checked out.

By the way, I'm 44 years old, and I remember being weighed in elementary school. It was just something they did, and no one ever had a problem with it. Then again, looking at our class photos from back then, there was only maybe one or two kids in a class of almost 20 that would have been considered "big" ...

Edit: I got that wrong on my daughter. She would KILL me for that. LOL She was always in the 95th percentile for HEIGHT and then 25th percentile for WEIGHT. Ugh ... that makes her look like a short fat kid, but she was always a tall, leggy kid who looked half a step from starvation. :-S

KWake1

Since Mass passed this I have not heard about it being implemented. This is a load of crap and the BMI scale is horribly inaccurate. I expect to get a similar one for my daughter if they are rolling this out. According to this BMI calculator, she is in the 97th percentile and Obese. Let me get a letter from the school calling my daughter obese and see how quick I jump down their throat. My daughter is taller than all the other kids and by no means even chubby. I would say send some nasty mail to the Deval Patrick to tell them to butt out.

http://apps.nccd.cdc.gov/dnpabmi/Calculator.aspx

Why in the world would you jump down their throats? Childhood obesity is becoming an epidemic in North America. Yes, the BMI scale can be horribly inaccurate but it can also be an indicator that something may be wrong. For some families, such a note might be the wake-up call they need.

If your daughter is not obese and her doctor is happy with her weight, etc, then it's not an issue for you. In that case, say thanks for the note, but our pediatrician/family doctor is on top of things and we're happy with our daughter's development.

Please don't shoot down a program that's aimed at helping when estimates are that this generation of kids will be the first to have a shorter lifespan than their parents.

Agreed! It's so hard to be objective with people we love and the school and administration are trying to help. Why dissuade them from it? Check your grand-daughter out with her doctor and if he's happy go with it. If he's not, you have a problem and should thank you the school for letting you know about it before it gets out of hand. Perhaps your grand-daughter doesn't eat well at school, or doesn't participate in gym or run around at recess? If the school notices behaviour like that and recoginzed her high weight and is trying to address it before it becomes an issue you have a fantastic program there and should be sending them flowers!! This is a much better alternative than your grand-daughter being completely ignored.

mycrazy8splus1

I was wondering about my kids. I just put all their info in the calculator and they all fell in the healthy range. They were ranged from 15.9 to 20.2 BMI.
I think it is definately something to keep an eye on. We need to start our kids off on the right track. My daughter had a friend that weighed 150 pounds at 8 years old. She was around 4 and half feet tall. Her parents had no problem with her weight although she was extremely overweight and winded walking up a flight of stairs. I have had thyroid tests, bloodwork, ect done on my kids by their docs because they are small. I knew there was nothing wrong with them other than that their parents are pygmies! All those tests said what I knew..they are healthy. But I had the tests done just to be sure. I don't want something to be wron g that could be fixed. Knowledge is power.

joselo2

i hate that schools weigh children!!!!! for one thing i think it is not the schools place to tell parents how tocare for there kids and also, it is cruel to the children, who probably worry a lot about being weighed. They just strted to bring this in during my later school years, i paid my brother to go for me, or just plain refused, but i younger child couldnt probably easily do that. If I have kids, I will tell the school i am NOT having my child weighed and will even make sure they arent in school that day if need be. I just so strongly disagree eith it. You should just manage your childs health in the best way you can,in the family and with a dr, as you always have done, and ignore the schools attempt to butt in. I hope your poor daughter is OK xxxx

NeverGivesUp

It is our duty as parents to make sure of what goes into our children's mouths. My kids have always been small. I have obesity on both sides of my family. I refuse to pass my issues on to my kids, this I have been very aware of since their birth. I do not think it is unreasonable for the school to check children especially when the parents may be in denial. There could be medical issues that should be dealt with or there could be an issue you may not be willing to be open to. Just think of your child and what is in their best interest. If you are defensive because there is an issue, you owe it to your child to help them anyway possible. If the school is off base then tell them so but it is hard to give advice when we don't know the child.

rubixcyoob

I don't get everyone saying the school are "being rude" or to "just ignore it". Would you ignore it if a medical professional told you that your BMI probably wasn't the best? Would you not go get a second opinion? Why is this any different?

The school doing weight checks is not a horrible idea. They give vaccines, do hearing/eye/lice tests - this is just another part of health. A much needed part of health.

At the very least I would take my child to see the family doctor with this concern at the forefront in order to get another perspective on it. Not just dismiss it entirely - would you do that if the school nurse told you to go and see an eye doctor, just because your child had good vision before?