Dads- if you're son wants a baby doll....?

12467

Replies

  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    PUT HIM WITH A BUNCH OF NORMAL KIDS A LITTLE OLDER THAN HE AND THEY WILL STRAIGTHEN HIM OUT REAL QUICK.

    This is baffling... Are you saying the OP's son is not normal?
  • ubermensch13
    ubermensch13 Posts: 824 Member
    There are a lot of people I hope don't have children based on these obviously ignorant and homophobic responses.......
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    I feel a thread lock coming or even deletion .
    Do you only let your daughters play with traditional girl toys?
    Are they allowed to build with blocks or play with trucks? Toy guns? Tool sets?

    We let them play with whatever. They have had tonka trucks, barbies, tinker toys, wood blocks, they have even helped me on the car.

    so of course I know what is coming next.. ...the double standard. I would expect more from any son i had. I would be firmer with him as well.. that is just how it is.

    But, what if your daughter grows up to be lesbian?! Oh noes!! (sarcasm)
  • briebear77
    briebear77 Posts: 253 Member
    There are a lot of people I hope don't have children based on these obviously ignorant and homophobic responses.......

    Agreed. SMH. People never cease to disappoint me.
  • gr8pillock
    gr8pillock Posts: 374 Member
    I know a father who have two daughers and one son. That son played with the dolls and what the hell..even gave the son a hand me down bike from one of he girls.. it was pink.

    He is the most feminin boy i have ever met.

    Why confuse the kid. boys should be brought up as men. Girls can get away with being raised a girl or even tomboyish - girls can still pull it off some how. Boys not.


    Knowing a badass mother****er who was raised by two women with an open household and no restrictions on who or how he chose to play, dress or behave, I have this to say in response. That feminine little boy would have been a feminine little boy whether punished for it or not. We are who we are and our nature will come out no matter how someone wishes to 'direct' us due to their own judgments and issues.

    Buy him that baby doll!!!
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    Wow.....some of you men need to remember that it's 2012.......

    My advice. Let the kid have the doll. Playing with dolls doesn't make a boy gay anymore than playing with legos or toy guns makes a girl a lesbian. I played with both dolls and lego sets. I'm straight and in no way,shape or form confused about my sexuality or anything like that.
  • chocl8girl
    chocl8girl Posts: 1,968 Member
    ALSO, if my future son comes to me and says he's gay (which won't be because he played with dolls, btw), I will not give a *kitten*.

    :flowerforyou:
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    I feel a thread lock coming or even deletion .
    Do you only let your daughters play with traditional girl toys?
    Are they allowed to build with blocks or play with trucks? Toy guns? Tool sets?

    We let them play with whatever. They have had tonka trucks, barbies, tinker toys, wood blocks, they have even helped me on the car.

    so of course I know what is coming next.. ...the double standard. I would expect more from any son i had. I would be firmer with him as well.. that is just how it is.
    So you are saying you find the influence of dolls more powerful that that of a toy truck? Or do you think the will of males is weaker?
  • srp2011
    srp2011 Posts: 1,829 Member
    Pretty sure I've read a few studies linking little boys and dolls to homosexuality. Can't remember if it either was an indicator of them already having gay tendencies or if it actually played a part in their sexual development.

    Either way, hell no. (Not a dad yet...but my son won't be playing with any dolls that I bought)

    Wrong. There is no such study and if there is, it is not a peer reviewed scientific study.

    "We conclude that strongly gender-typed toys appear to be less supportive of optimal development than neutral or moderately gender-typed toys."

    http://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11199-005-7729-0?LI=true

    BAM

    Wow, did you even read the study that you posted as your 'proof'???? I seriously doubt it. All this 'study' did was ask a bunch of undergraduate psychology students to rate a bunch of toys as to whether they thought the toys were masculine, feminine, or gender-neutral. There is absolutely NOTHING in this study linking types of toys with childhood development or sexuality. There weren't even children involved in the study. The fact that the authors make a hand-waving statement about what is really a hypothesis that wasn't even tested by their study doesn't support your point at all.

    As a scientist, I'm absolutely appalled by the inability of many people to read and interpret scientific information...

    That and the quote posted has absolutely nothing to do with the topic at hand. "We conclude that strongly gender-typed toys appear to be less supportive of optimal development than neutral or moderately gender-typed toys." That is saying that moderately gender-typed toys and neutral toys are better for optimal development and that strongly gender-typed ones are sub-optimal. It says nothing about specific gender geared toys being good or bad for the opposite gender.
    Of course I didn't read the study because the pdf file isn't loading right on my computer which is why I didn't comment on it earlier.

    Yes, and if he had read to the end of the article, he would have found another quote where the authors stated that for children of both sexes, some play with toys that were moderately gender-typed was probably best (ie, both boys and girls should be exposed to both domestic toys as well as construction-type toys)...
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
    I feel a thread lock coming or even deletion .
    Do you only let your daughters play with traditional girl toys?
    Are they allowed to build with blocks or play with trucks? Toy guns? Tool sets?

    We let them play with whatever. They have had tonka trucks, barbies, tinker toys, wood blocks, they have even helped me on the car.

    so of course I know what is coming next.. ...the double standard. I would expect more from any son i had. I would be firmer with him as well.. that is just how it is.

    So in your world, girls can play with whatever they wish, but boy MUST play with "gender appropriate" toys? Yea, that IS a double standard and it's disturbing that in this day and age, this mindset still exists.
  • WeatherGirl8
    WeatherGirl8 Posts: 91 Member
    Oh hey arguments!

    Well, I'm going to pass on those, but just leave this 'cause I thought of it when I saw the title.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lshobg1Wt2M (William Wants a Doll- Free to be You and Me)
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    I had a friend as a kid, her parents wouldn't let her have a Ken doll. So when we played Barbies they were all lesbians. They married each other. Had babies together. I like to think it made us both more open-minded. :)
  • dmpizza
    dmpizza Posts: 3,321 Member
    All children like to nurture and systematize, which is whyPokemon was so successful.
    He is very young , so I don't think this is weird.
    Get him a stuffed puppy and tell him it's a baby dog that needs his love.
  • Kenzietea2
    Kenzietea2 Posts: 1,132 Member
    He's a kid, it's probably a phase. Get him the doll.
  • gr8pillock
    gr8pillock Posts: 374 Member
    i fought tooth and nail when my daughter was tiny to raise her as unbiased as possible. I chose medium colors, rather than pink, cool toys, hard core stuff, skulls and crossbones, pirates, ninjas, Jackie Chan movies/cartoons. All of it. I wanted a tomboy, or at least not a princess...

    Guess what.

    I got a Princess. NOTHING I could have done would have stopped her from choosing pink, from wanting dolls, from princess dresses and makeup and nail polish. She's seven now and loves guns and Jackie Chan and karate class and Girl Scouts, and she's the coolest, most sarcastic and funny little girl ever, but she still LOVES her pink. She is going to be a gorgeous, high class, dressed to the nines kind of woman. And who am I to judge, deflect, or redirect that when it is WHO SHE IS!

    This relates to parents who try to "Force" a son to be 'manly.' Real men take care of their children, hold and cuddle and love just as openly and lovingly as women, at least the good fathers I've known. That makes them better men, not less. As a baby boy, being told it is 'unmasculine,' 'unmanly,' or feminine to have a baby, or worse, that feminine is somehow a bad thing, is unebelievably blind.
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
    I was a tomboy growing up. I wanted all the Star Wars action figures. Thank goodness my parents didn't buy them for me because I would have become a lesbian if they had.

    I seriously dodged a bullet. Even though I had crushes on boys when I was 3 those toys would have turned me. I totally owe my parents a coke.
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    I feel a thread lock coming or even deletion .
    Do you only let your daughters play with traditional girl toys?
    Are they allowed to build with blocks or play with trucks? Toy guns? Tool sets?

    We let them play with whatever. They have had tonka trucks, barbies, tinker toys, wood blocks, they have even helped me on the car.

    so of course I know what is coming next.. ...the double standard. I would expect more from any son i had. I would be firmer with him as well.. that is just how it is.
    So you are saying you find the influence of dolls more powerful that that of a toy truck? Or do you think the will of males is weaker?

    No on both questions.

    I just think boys should not be raised the say way as a girl.
    That's too bad. Playing with dolls led my brother to become an incredibly gifted surgeon. He was always performing exams on the dolls. Good thing for his patients my parents were more open.
  • BigDnSW
    BigDnSW Posts: 641 Member
    OK, I'll confess. I grew up playing with dolls...GI Joe, little green army men, and a sock monkey (you have to be born in the 50's or 60' to know that)...I am bi...yes I am. We have both Mac and PC's in our office. How shameful of me. If I only would have burned that fuzzy sock monkey...

    That's about how fadiculai the some of the gender biases in this thread are...
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
    i fought tooth and nail when my daughter was tiny to raise her as unbiased as possible. I chose medium colors, rather than pink, cool toys, hard core stuff, skulls and crossbones, pirates, ninjas, Jackie Chan movies/cartoons. All of it. I wanted a tomboy, or at least not a princess...

    Guess what.

    I got a Princess. NOTHING I could have done would have stopped her from choosing pink, from wanting dolls, from princess dresses and makeup and nail polish. She's seven now and loves guns and Jackie Chan and karate class and Girl Scouts, and she's the coolest, most sarcastic and funny little girl ever, but she still LOVES her pink. She is going to be a gorgeous, high class, dressed to the nines kind of woman. And who am I to judge, deflect, or redirect that when it is WHO SHE IS!

    This relates to parents who try to "Force" a son to be 'manly.' Real men take care of their children, hold and cuddle and love just as openly and lovingly as women, at least the good fathers I've known. That makes them better men, not less. As a baby boy, being told it is 'unmasculine,' 'unmanly,' or feminine to have a baby, or worse, that feminine is somehow a bad thing, is unebelievably blind.

    I don't know you, but I love you.
  • phyllio77
    phyllio77 Posts: 192 Member
    This is how children learn to nurture and mimic being parents. A boy doll a girl doll...its just a doll. :) Merry Ho Ho!
  • gluestic14
    gluestic14 Posts: 18 Member
    I haven't read through all these comments so if I'm repeating someone I'm sorry, but what's the difference between a boy carrying around a baby doll and say something like a stuffed animal, like a little doggy or something. Or even a baby blanket. It's kind of the same thing, they are carrying around and caring for something in a nurturing way...I mean, maybe the baby blanket is a stretch but still...Am I making sense or am I way off? I don't have any children of my own (just a step daughter) so maybe I'm way off, but I feel like I would be ok with my son playing with whatever he wanted.
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    i fought tooth and nail when my daughter was tiny to raise her as unbiased as possible. I chose medium colors, rather than pink, cool toys, hard core stuff, skulls and crossbones, pirates, ninjas, Jackie Chan movies/cartoons. All of it. I wanted a tomboy, or at least not a princess...

    Guess what.

    I got a Princess. NOTHING I could have done would have stopped her from choosing pink, from wanting dolls, from princess dresses and makeup and nail polish. She's seven now and loves guns and Jackie Chan and karate class and Girl Scouts, and she's the coolest, most sarcastic and funny little girl ever, but she still LOVES her pink. She is going to be a gorgeous, high class, dressed to the nines kind of woman. And who am I to judge, deflect, or redirect that when it is WHO SHE IS!

    This relates to parents who try to "Force" a son to be 'manly.' Real men take care of their children, hold and cuddle and love just as openly and lovingly as women, at least the good fathers I've known. That makes them better men, not less. As a baby boy, being told it is 'unmasculine,' 'unmanly,' or feminine to have a baby, or worse, that feminine is somehow a bad thing, is unebelievably blind.
    Well said.
  • missym357
    missym357 Posts: 210 Member


    This relates to parents who try to "Force" a son to be 'manly.' Real men take care of their children, hold and cuddle and love just as openly and lovingly as women, at least the good fathers I've known. That makes them better men, not less. As a baby boy, being told it is 'unmasculine,' 'unmanly,' or feminine to have a baby, or worse, that feminine is somehow a bad thing, is unebelievably blind.

    Yes!!! I completely agree!!

    My husband had no problem with our sons playing with dolls. No big deal really. My oldest had one in preparation of his younger brother being born and my youngest had one to match when he was 2. Two year old boys have no sense of 'baby dolls are for girls' and if they did it would be because some adult pushed that on them.

    We're not raising macho little a-holes. We're aiming to raise smart, good, thoughtful, strong men that don't have hangups and weren't forced to be anything other than the best of who and what they are. So far so good- and they don't appear to show any signs of being gay (they are 11 and 9 and total boys). If they did end up gay it would not be the end fo the world.
  • DLSlim
    DLSlim Posts: 92 Member
    I don't believe in "girl" toys and "boy" toys. If your son wants a doll, he should have a doll. If he wants a kitchen set, find him a kitchen set (they even have blue/chrome ones). There is nothing wrong with it.
  • Brunner26_2
    Brunner26_2 Posts: 1,152
    I feel a thread lock coming or even deletion .
    Do you only let your daughters play with traditional girl toys?
    Are they allowed to build with blocks or play with trucks? Toy guns? Tool sets?

    We let them play with whatever. They have had tonka trucks, barbies, tinker toys, wood blocks, they have even helped me on the car.

    so of course I know what is coming next.. ...the double standard. I would expect more from any son i had. I would be firmer with him as well.. that is just how it is.

    But, what if your daughter grows up to be lesbian?! Oh noes!! (sarcasm)

    That depends.... Is she hot?
  • trijoe
    trijoe Posts: 729 Member
    I have 3 daughters, no sons. So maybe my answer isn't worthy. Still:

    My daughters are or have been into trains, dinosaurs, hockey, frogs, and dogs. They can't stand cheerleading. One's favorite color is pink, but the rest are into blue. They run 5K races (they're 10, 8, 8) and my oldest has a shirt that says, "Some girls chase boys. I pass them."

    They're perfectly free to be the children they decide to be, no questions asked, nor any pressure to be different. My oldest can't stand boys, no matter how wonderful her friends tell her they are. Does this mean she'll never like boys? I don't know. Maybe, maybe not. If it does, then so be it. She's still be warm and wonderful and beautiful and witty and thoughtful and caring and intelligent. Nothing, or nobody, will ever take those traits away from her.

    So basically, who really gives a flying **** what a child plays with? Your child is who he/she is. Me personally? I'd rather celebrate my children for being who they are then criticize them for not being who I think they should be.

    But that's just me.
  • gluestic14
    gluestic14 Posts: 18 Member
    i fought tooth and nail when my daughter was tiny to raise her as unbiased as possible. I chose medium colors, rather than pink, cool toys, hard core stuff, skulls and crossbones, pirates, ninjas, Jackie Chan movies/cartoons. All of it. I wanted a tomboy, or at least not a princess...

    Guess what.

    I got a Princess. NOTHING I could have done would have stopped her from choosing pink, from wanting dolls, from princess dresses and makeup and nail polish. She's seven now and loves guns and Jackie Chan and karate class and Girl Scouts, and she's the coolest, most sarcastic and funny little girl ever, but she still LOVES her pink. She is going to be a gorgeous, high class, dressed to the nines kind of woman. And who am I to judge, deflect, or redirect that when it is WHO SHE IS!

    This relates to parents who try to "Force" a son to be 'manly.' Real men take care of their children, hold and cuddle and love just as openly and lovingly as women, at least the good fathers I've known. That makes them better men, not less. As a baby boy, being told it is 'unmasculine,' 'unmanly,' or feminine to have a baby, or worse, that feminine is somehow a bad thing, is unebelievably blind.

    I don't know you, but I love you.

    Me too!
  • Graelwyn75
    Graelwyn75 Posts: 4,404 Member
    i fought tooth and nail when my daughter was tiny to raise her as unbiased as possible. I chose medium colors, rather than pink, cool toys, hard core stuff, skulls and crossbones, pirates, ninjas, Jackie Chan movies/cartoons. All of it. I wanted a tomboy, or at least not a princess...

    Guess what.

    I got a Princess. NOTHING I could have done would have stopped her from choosing pink, from wanting dolls, from princess dresses and makeup and nail polish. She's seven now and loves guns and Jackie Chan and karate class and Girl Scouts, and she's the coolest, most sarcastic and funny little girl ever, but she still LOVES her pink. She is going to be a gorgeous, high class, dressed to the nines kind of woman. And who am I to judge, deflect, or redirect that when it is WHO SHE IS!

    This relates to parents who try to "Force" a son to be 'manly.' Real men take care of their children, hold and cuddle and love just as openly and lovingly as women, at least the good fathers I've known. That makes them better men, not less. As a baby boy, being told it is 'unmasculine,' 'unmanly,' or feminine to have a baby, or worse, that feminine is somehow a bad thing, is unebelievably blind.

    Wonderfully said.
  • DeborahBatewell
    DeborahBatewell Posts: 147 Member
    It's not a big deal. My son had a cabbage patch doll when he was little and his step-sister liked to play with trucks instead of dolls. My son is gay and his sister is a lesbian. The doll didn't cause him to be that way. Life is hard enough for kids today without stereotypes of what is acceptable because of their sex.
  • mbryant22
    mbryant22 Posts: 24 Member
    At that age, my son wanted one, too. My husband wasn't thrilled, but said as long as it was a "boy-ish" baby doll he was fine with it. I found one that was dressed in a blue/green outfit. My son loved that doll! He played with it for a couple of years! And he is 11 now and is fine!! haha!
This discussion has been closed.