What's wrong with her husband?

Iron_warrior33

Ok, I met this girl online around June of this year. She was looking for friends because she was tired of being home alone while her hubby went to work and school (she's 24, he's 40 been together since she was 18). I was living with my ex at the time, and figured I could always use a women perspective on things. Well, when we finally agreed to meet, it was at a movie she wanted to see and he didn't. After the movie, she wanted to go to dinner. Well, we hung out for a while, mostly in public and found a nice cozy spot at the local lake. This whole time, he knew we were hanging out and even encouraged it by telling her, that if he was going to be home late, that she could stay with me until he was on his way. Eventually, she ended up kissing me, and things just progressed from there. The whole time, until this point, i was a gentleman, I didn't even so much as hug her good bye. Back to the subject at hand. She spoils me, takes me out to eat, to the movies, and actually asks me if I need or want anything when we're in the store, and again her husband encourages this by asking her to make sure I have stuff like my meds, vitamins, mins on my phone, etc...just the usual necessities. Even on thanksgiving, they both came over, and brought me some food, and hung out. WHile here, he asked two VERY interesting questions. 1. Does she call me her boyfriend? After answering no, he said that her and I had a very weird relationship then. 2. Has she told me she took a pregnancy test yet, even though he didn't know why. Again, I answered no, and he said, "Oh, I thought you were the reason she took it."
Yes, they are married, and even went to Rome on their honeymoon and are planning a trip to Dublin for their spring break. IDK, if it's just a cover for him being gay or not. Not saying he is, but he has piks of him on FB cuddling up with life size carebears. NTM, I have a pitbull and when he came over he said, he prefers little fluffy dogs that you can stick in purses. She says he's not, and even if he was his parents would understand, since they accept his lesbian sister. On the other hand, his dad is a rich and famous author and editor, and has been on CNN, and MSNBC numerous times, but yet they live in a small po-dunk town and drive 20yo cars, and live in a crummy apartment complex. She teaches special needs students, went to a university and graduated with a masters in special ed. He's 40, just started a community college to be a mechanic. IDK, something just doesn't seem right between them, and I hope somone can help figure this out. Might I add, she treats me better than any girl I ever dated, and I just don't want to see her get hurt by staying in this marriage.

ETA:Forgot to mention one thing, he's always putting her last. When he goes to school, he stays several hours after to hang with friends. He goes out, most of the time with school or work friends, unless they actually have to go somewhere, they never go out together, he's actually stood her up on date nights that he planned to hang out with his friends. He puts everything before her, including damn tv shows. Hell, they don't even sleep in bed together, ones on the couch, the other is in the bed.

Jacwhite22

Whats wrong with him is he trusts her.....She obviously doesn't deserve it and you don't sound a whole lot better.

farfoorah

Man, I so thought this was gonna be like a lesbian story, but you ended out being a man...I hate you.

_the_feniks_

*edited because... so not worth a 3rd strike

ilovemybuggy

Whats wrong with him is he trusts her.....She obviously doesn't deserve it and you don't sound a whole lot better.

Nailed it. (pun totally intended)

Iron_warrior33

Whats wrong with him is he trusts her.....She obviously doesn't deserve it and you don't sound a whole lot better.

Yes, the fact that he thought I was the reason she was taking a pregnancy test, show's he trusts her? And the fact that he thought it was strange that she does not call me her boyfriend, apparently shows he knows somethings going on. I honestly think he doesn't care, or he's cheating on her, or just gay. What guy calls up his wifes b/f to tell them she was in an accident. The fact I answered the phone, thinking it was her, and said, "hey beautiful," only to have him tell me she was in the ER....well, yeah.

BrettPGH

Sure you just don't want to see her get hurt.. such a gentleman you are. Way to protect her from a relationship with her husband! You shining knight you!

Iron_warrior33

Man, I so thought this was gonna be like a lesbian story, but you ended out being a man...I hate you.

THat would truly have been soooo much hotter.

AJ_Pete

Whats wrong with him is he trusts her.....She obviously doesn't deserve it and you don't sound a whole lot better.

Yes, the fact that he thought I was the reason she was taking a pregnancy test, show's he trusts her? And the fact that he thought it was strange that she does not call me her boyfriend, apparently shows he knows somethings going on. I honestly think he doesn't care, or he's cheating on her, or just gay. What guy calls up his wifes b/f to tell them she was in an accident. The fact I answered the phone, thinking it was her, and said, "hey beautiful," only to have him tell me she was in the ER....well, yeah.

Well, that makes you just as weird as the situation you allowed yourself to be put in, bub.

ilovemybuggy

Sure you just don't want to see her get hurt.. such a gentleman you are. Way to protect her from a relationship with her husband! You shining knight you!

haha!

2BeFit4Jesus

Whats wrong with him is he trusts her.....She obviously doesn't deserve it and you don't sound a whole lot better.

End Thread.

CallMeCupcakeDammit

Damn, that sounds a lot like my marriage. Except you would be the band *kitten* and she would be my husband. I agree with Jac. Sounds like she doesn't deserve his trust. Lifesize Care Bears, huh?

_Wits_

I'm still stuck on the whole "I met this girl online...we went out..more happened...oh she's married.. I knew that".

But you are concerned with what's up with her husband?

Should prolly just be concerned with yourself and stop hooking up with a married woman....or find out wtf is her deal and not ask random people online.

gingerveg

Sounds like they are in an open marriage. Why don't you just ask her? Communication is important and you need to know where you stand/what the rules are with this relationship. I dont think you shouid assume he is gay, there are a lot of different types of marriage/relationships out there---no big deal. If it is indeed open and you are okay with being the 3rd and everyone else is okay with it then what is the problem? You said she treats you well-so just enjoy.

Hellbent_Heidi

So you're banging a married chick and you wonder what's wrong with HER HUSBAND?

Ok, he might be gay or its an open marriage, but seriously...if she's cheating with you...she'll cheat on you if you ever 'end up together' one day.

It sounds like a super weird situation and my gut instinct is to tell you to put some major distance between yourself and the situation.

ilovemybuggy

Ok, he might be gay or its an open marriage, but seriously...if she's cheating with you...she'll cheat on you if you ever 'end up together' one day.

Seems to be the one thing people never understand.

Captain_Tightpants

Have you considered that they might be polyamorous?

laughingdani

No. Just no.

BrettPGH

Yes, the fact that he thought I was the reason she was taking a pregnancy test, show's he trusts her? And the fact that he thought it was strange that she does not call me her boyfriend, apparently shows he knows somethings going on. I honestly think he doesn't care, or he's cheating on her, or just gay. What guy calls up his wifes b/f to tell them she was in an accident. The fact I answered the phone, thinking it was her, and said, "hey beautiful," only to have him tell me she was in the ER....well, yeah.

There's another option you aren't considering. He's biding his time, waiting until he knows for sure what you're up to, and then he's going to put a gun to your head and make you beg for your life.

You don't know the guy, you have no idea what he might be capable of.

mtiheartmuscle

Swingers..gotta love em'.

Sublog

TL;DR

corn63

Sounds like a polyamorous situation.


But I wouldn't be asking what's wrong with him, what's wrong with YOU? You're pursuing a married woman and allowing yourself to be a kept man BY a married woman.

madworld1

That's really weird. I agree, he's either gay or cheating on her. Either way, the marriage is not "normal." Maybe it's an open marriage? Since ya'll seem pretty close, why not just ask her?

FitBeto

Yeah you shouldnt trust her either man, if shes doing this to her husband, and leaves him for you, then how is she going to treat you? Once a ho always a ho.

BurtHuttz

What's wrong with her husband is the last question you should be worrying about.

volarium

Pretty sure it's actually the husband that's interested in you. I say go for it, try something new.

corn63

Or it might be a cuckold relationship. Now that would be interesting.

chivalryder

Pixi_Rex

Sounds like a poly relationship... or an open relationship where they trust each other. If you are seriously curious ask her. Seems like you have a decent enough relationship. If it is one of the 2 and you are OK with being the third than enjoy it.

AmyFett

Man, I so thought this was gonna be like a lesbian story, but you ended out being a man...I hate you.

I thought the same thing.

As for OP's question, he trusts her or their marriage is fake. Either way. She is married. Go elsewhere.

cwolfman13

This whole thing is all kinds of weird...