Boyfriend is a Job Jumper

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  • Pinkgurl13
    Pinkgurl13 Posts: 47 Member
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    Thanks for everybody's replies...

    I already knew the answer. Just wanted some justification. Maybe I'll show him this thread :) Haha.
  • christine24t
    christine24t Posts: 6,064 Member
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    You are not overreacting. Clearly he has problems if he has been fired from multiple jobs.
  • ncahill77
    ncahill77 Posts: 501 Member
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    Ugh, my 47 year old brother is just like this, has 2 kids and a wife that truly has to be up for sainthood or has the poorest self esteem ever. Do yourself a favor and move on. All that said I still love my brother.
  • jeremyw1977
    jeremyw1977 Posts: 505 Member
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    Lol. He has actually already worked at Sonic as a GM. Thats the thing... he's 30 years old and has probably had 100 jobs in his life! Its freaking crazy.

    If this is how he is while he's still in the "boyfriend" phase, imagine him in the "husband" and/or "father" phase.
    It's hard to think that he would change much given the current level of stability he is showing.
  • _DaniD_
    _DaniD_ Posts: 2,186 Member
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    Who cares if he is a job hopper if he is paying his side of the bills? If you love him, deal with it. He is probably young and figuring it out. Everyone goes through it.
  • emmalouc93
    emmalouc93 Posts: 328 Member
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    'Dump him'?

    What terrible advice. Things get hard, just give up and let go. Sure!! Don't work on your relationship, just jump ship :P

    He is an adult just like you, he has to find out what he wants in life and if you love him, you support him and ENCOURAGE him to change, not just get rid of the man.

    It is that simple.
  • emmalouc93
    emmalouc93 Posts: 328 Member
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    Who cares if he is a job hopper if he is paying his side of the bills? If you love him, deal with it. He is probably young and figuring it out. Everyone goes through it.

    This. It is so immature and irresponsible to give up on a relationship based on JOBS. It would be different if he never bothered to anything at all - clearly, he just needs to find something that fits and that is not always easy. Just because you have found it, does not mean others have.

    I can't believe people actually break up over these things.. .I must be living in a completely different world to most if I think a relationship is for better and the worst of the worst.
  • jaxxie
    jaxxie Posts: 572 Member
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    Depending on height and weight...you could easily lose weight. Just find a soccer ball to practice with and see how that works!
  • VelociMama
    VelociMama Posts: 3,119 Member
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    Lol. He has actually already worked at Sonic as a GM. Thats the thing... he's 30 years old and has probably had 100 jobs in his life! Its freaking crazy.

    DUMP

    If you want a future together (marriage and family), that kind of behavior is a huge red flag.

    It's one thing if he doesn't make much money but consistently brings in a paycheck and doesn't job-hop (all these are totally workable situations), but it's entirely another if he refuses to hold a job down and gets himself fired or quits constantly.
  • ncahill77
    ncahill77 Posts: 501 Member
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    Who cares if he is a job hopper if he is paying his side of the bills? If you love him, deal with it. He is probably young and figuring it out. Everyone goes through it.

    This. It is so immature and irresponsible to give up on a relationship based on JOBS. It would be different if he never bothered to anything at all - clearly, he just needs to find something that fits and that is not always easy. Just because you have found it, does not mean others have.

    I can't believe people actually break up over these things.. .I must be living in a completely different world to most if I think a relationship is for better and the worst of the worst.

    Please don't offer any more advice....EVER.

    No one is talking about divore and separating kids, this is boyfriend/girlfriend issues, would you really stay with someone who just quit bathing because he was too lazy just because you "love him"?
  • _DaniD_
    _DaniD_ Posts: 2,186 Member
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    Maybe I'll show him this thread :) Haha.

    Be sure to show him this response too ....

    Just want to add my own experience. My boyfriend used to make low wages, had inconsistent paychecks, was on unemployment a few times. We lived off my salary for years, now he makes 4 times as much as I do and we still have combined income. It's not always easy, people aren't perfect, as long as you love each other there is no real problem just a minor speed bump.
  • norcal_yogi
    norcal_yogi Posts: 675 Member
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    i am not a very patient person.... so...i'd have a hard time with this.

    however, it does sound like he may have issues working for other people. possibly.

    OR...he's just lazy.
  • 2muchsauce
    2muchsauce Posts: 1,078
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    Lol. He has actually already worked at Sonic as a GM. Thats the thing... he's 30 years old and has probably had 100 jobs in his life! Its freaking crazy.

    I don't think you can say this is just a phase anymore at 100+ jobs at 30 years old. I think it's more likely a habit that's going to be harder and harder to break as he gets older.
  • dragonbait0126
    dragonbait0126 Posts: 568 Member
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    Okay. I got through 2 pages of people saying to leave him and then quit reading. Since I can relate, I'll share my story. My husband and I have been together for 14 years and officially married for 2. During this time, I've seen him go from job to job to job. Some he's quit, some he's been fired from, and some he's gotten laid-off from. Every time something happens he feels guilty. He HATES not always having a check come in and being able to help provide. On the other hand, the times when he wasn't working, he always took care of the house. He cooked, he cleaned, he did laundry, everything. In fact, he's working currently and he still does it. My mom says that during the 1st four years of my parents being married, my dad was the same way and would jump from job to job. He finally settled down and found a job he stayed with for years until the plant he worked at closed. It took him about 6 months to find another job and then he was there for 15 years before he retired. Talk to you boyfriend. Let him know your concerns and how you feel. He's still not totally depending on you to pay for everything for him. You said he was still managing to pay his bills. Have that conversation but if you truly love him, you'll stand by him through the good times and bad. And just because someone has a million jobs does NOT make them a bad boyfriend/husband/father. I can attest to that 1st hand.
  • smanning1982
    smanning1982 Posts: 210 Member
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    NOt to mention he's 30 and keeps getting jobs at fast food joints? He should be well into a good career where he gets benefits, 401k etc. That's the kind of guy you should be looking for!
  • believe22
    believe22 Posts: 210 Member
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    Why does he keep getting fired from fast food places? I understand not being able to keep a job because he's quitting them, but obviously there's a problem when he's been fired as many times as he has.

    Is this something that you'll be able to deal with 10-15 years from now? Him hopping from job to job, dealing withe the stress that comes from it. If not, then leave him. If you want to continue watching him quit/get fired from fast food joints then by all means, stay with him.
  • meshashesha2012
    meshashesha2012 Posts: 8,326 Member
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    Who cares if he is a job hopper if he is paying his side of the bills? If you love him, deal with it. He is probably young and figuring it out. Everyone goes through it.

    This. It is so immature and irresponsible to give up on a relationship based on JOBS. It would be different if he never bothered to anything at all - clearly, he just needs to find something that fits and that is not always easy. Just because you have found it, does not mean others have.

    I can't believe people actually break up over these things.. .I must be living in a completely different world to most if I think a relationship is for better and the worst of the worst.

    i think you might be. i see no reason to treat a B/GF situation as "for better or worse" those are in marriage vows, not in the "let's be exclusive" vows.


    depending on his age i'd give this guy a past, but anything beyond mid 20's and he'd need to grow the hell up.

    oh wait, i just looked and i saw this fool is in his 30's.

    dump his behind. this is not how responsible adults act.
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
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    [Um... are you sure he's really HAD these jobs?
    Saw a woman on Dr. Phil the other day - her husband FAKED having a job for over a year.... would call/text her on his supposed "breaks" and on his "lunches"....... no joke.

    Why would he keep quitting jobs he doesn't have?

    So he could sleep in for a week? I have no idea.
    All I know is she says he pays his bills, for all she knows he could be out all day selling drugs, not managing burger joints.
    Just sayin'......

    someone has been watching too much Breaking Bad...... :laugh: :wink:
  • Mhaney
    Mhaney Posts: 467 Member
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    sounds like a loser, sorry, dump him. you think its bad now? imagine being married to him and having to support him because he has issues.


    this 1000x this. I speak from experience.
  • emmalouc93
    emmalouc93 Posts: 328 Member
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    No one is talking about divorce and separating kids, this is boyfriend/girlfriend issues, would you really stay with someone who just quit bathing because he was too lazy just because you "love him"?


    Well, in my mind if you are willing to declare on the internet you 'love' a man you have been with for two years, that is a little more serious than a fling you can just throw away. People have such disregard for how other people feel it is disgusting, why waste two years of this mans life and then just thrown him away because he doesn't have the right paycheck? Yet you would complain if someone said you needed a man to support you. (Women in gen.)

    Women need a huge wake up call, I feel sorry for this guy.

    For better or worse is an expression, it is used in marriage but not exclusive to marriage. If you really 'loved' someone as she says she does, that means all the time. Good times and bad, not just when you feel like it.

    There's far more important things than what occupation or how much money someone makes, if you are willing to be with someone that should be that.

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