Marriage values in our society....

cmriverside

This is more gossipy than chit-chatty. We really need a Gossip and Rant section.

sizzle74

Maybe if people put out regularly to their spouses there would be less of it. :bigsmile:

I have yet to have a man on here seek my attention out who is getting regular ***** from his wife.

doorki

I yearn for the good 'ol days when affairs didn't happen.

Riiiiiggghhhttt abbooouuutttt NOW:

Sunlight2013

Actually it was my cousins husband. I'm not whining, just disappointed thats all. I also agree that marriage is sacred and I am just saddened by this news.

parys1

If she would follow the bible and just do what I tell her to, no matter how vulgar or base, I wouldn't need to go looking for carrots in Caterwaul's garden if you catch my drift. You know, pick some berries at the apple orchard? Eh? Eh? Grabbing a few pints down at the old five and dime?? Eh? Get me? Heh. Eh?

:flowerforyou:

KaleidoscopeEyes1056

I yearn for the good 'ol days when affairs didn't happen.

When unicorns flourished and Jesus rode Dinosaurs....

Seriously, I love you. Can I have an affair with you? Which would only include texting, by the way.

parys1

This is more gossipy than chit-chatty. We really need a Gossip and Rant section.

Friggin' brilliant.

SmexAppeal

Oh, and why is marriage "sacred"? It is only a contract really, and contracts are broken or dissolved all the time. Of course, I'm an atheist and don't place the same importance on the word "marriage" many religious people might.

I don't think you have to be "religious" to put value upon your marriage. Regardless of the actual contract, you look someone you love dead in the eye and you vow your love and faithfulness through sickness and health, rich or poor, etc. Why do I have to be religious to think that means something??

Sunlight2013

I know that if anything like this ever happened to me, I would TRY my best to work through it with my husband....I would....but knowing my personality, it would be the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life.

With all due respect, you really have no idea what your reaction to an affair would be until you've been cheated on by your spouse. You can speculate what you WOULD do but not what you actually do. The circumstances of each affair are different. The circumstances and arrangements of each married couple are different. Why? Because "values" are subjective and usually based on cultural norms which don't always fit everyone. Your values are not always others' values.

Good Point

diodelcibo

Just because somebody doesn't conform to your values doesn't make them anything less than you.

I never want to get married.

Molly_Maguire

The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.

And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.

I couldn't agree with this more. Nobody put a gun to your head and MADE anyone read this thread. And there is a difference between "judging" someone, and making observations. And to those who claim that extramarital affairs may constitute cheating in some cases, but not in others, then you are in for a rude awakening. Any form of deviating from the person you vowed to spend the rest of your life with is CHEATING, any way you slice it. It doesn't mean your marriage is automatically over, or that you can't ever work it out or get past it, but it's still cheating, and it's still wrong. And like OP, I'm not judging anyone for doing it, everyone is free to live their lives, and I'm not going to look down on anyone just because they sin differently than me. So don't go attacking OP or myself for sharing our opinions and convictions, please.

LetsMakeupXtina

so, who's down for some sexting?

sorry, bad joke.

Sunlight2013

The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.

And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.

Thank you.

FGVC1188

Oh, and why is marriage "sacred"? It is only a contract really, and contracts are broken or dissolved all the time. Of course, I'm an atheist and don't place the same importance on the word "marriage" many religious people might.

Of course, in a thread which has nothing to do with religion, the atheist has to let everyone know what his beliefs are.

Sunlight2013

so, who's down for some sexting?

sorry, bad joke.

LOL

BeachGingerOnTheRocks

Every action that one person takes that he or she knows will hurt the other person damages the bond. Enough damage, with or without actual infidelity, and the marriage is ruined.

Having said that, what defines an "affair" is to be decided by each individual marriage. The rules for one couple aren't the rules for another. But that's something that should be worked out before buying the ring and making the babies. Sadly, that is usually the one thing that is never determined before buying the ring and making the babies.

I can feel terrible for them and maybe worry about my own marriage, but I can't judge what happens between couples. There's a whole lot of gray here. Love and life isn't black and white.

Okay off my soap box. The air's kinda thin up here.

Molly_Maguire

There is no question that we are seeing diminishing returns from the 60's "Sexual Revolution" that then led to today's "Hookup Culture".

I don't know how to fix it, but we just simply are not creating a better society when we screw whatever shakes in front of us like some monkey or over-libido'd jerk.

*Falls over laughing, then agrees profusely*

Sunlight2013

The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.

And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.

I couldn't agree with this more. Nobody put a gun to your head and MADE anyone read this thread. And there is a difference between "judging" someone, and making observations. And to those who claim that extramarital affairs may constitute cheating in some cases, but not in others, then you are in for a rude awakening. Any form of deviating from the person you vowed to spend the rest of your life with is CHEATING, any way you slice it. It doesn't mean your marriage is automatically over, or that you can't ever work it out or get past it, but it's still cheating, and it's still wrong. And like OP, I'm not judging anyone for doing it, everyone is free to live their lives, and I'm not going to look down on anyone just because they sin differently than me. So don't go attacking OP or myself for sharing our opinions and convictions, please.

Thankyou for saying that. I agree

Molly_Maguire

Oh, and why is marriage "sacred"? It is only a contract really, and contracts are broken or dissolved all the time. Of course, I'm an atheist and don't place the same importance on the word "marriage" many religious people might.

Of course, in a thread which has nothing to do with religion, the atheist has to let everyone know what his beliefs are.

Yup.

"How do you know if a person is an atheist?"

"Oh, don't worry--they'll TELL ya!"

NearlyJen

Another Judgey McJudgerton thread....BINGO!

Yep. There are no "marriage values", honey. There are YOUR marriage values, which mean nothing to me.

Mr_Bad_Example

I am very disappointed in hearing some news today. Where has everyone's marriage values gone? I'm hearing waaay too much about people having affairs, or secretly meeting someone for "lunch" or "texting and/or talking on the phone" when your spouse is unaware. These are all considered Affairs....whether physical and/or emotional....they are still affairs. I know that if anything like this ever happened to me, I would TRY my best to work through it with my husband....I would....but knowing my personality, it would be the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. I feel so BLESSED that I have a husband who has the same marriage values as mine but also dumbfounded and a little (i should say ALOT) disgusted at the things I have seen at the gym and also with the news I heard today. Shame on some people for not putting the importance of their marriage above any "lust" or attraction you may of felt.

I guess you haven't heard... but affairs burn at least 300 calories per session. That's a good burn!

laj2504

The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.

And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.

Amen Girl!!!

cwolfman13

Let me break it to you: It has always been that way, it is just much more easy to know about these things now. Study history, infidelity all over the place!

This^^^^

Actually, not so long ago, it was not only socially acceptable, but expected that a successful man would have at least one mistress in addition to his wife. Check out some of our forefathers...check out some of the letters to Ben Franklin from his wife while he was away in France...something to the tune of, I hope you're having fun with all of those beautiful women over there...try not to break their hearts, etc.

ubermensch13

Oh, and why is marriage "sacred"? It is only a contract really, and contracts are broken or dissolved all the time. Of course, I'm an atheist and don't place the same importance on the word "marriage" many religious people might.

Of course, in a thread which has nothing to do with religion, the atheist has to let everyone know what his beliefs are.

Just to educate you a bit, the word sacred has a religious/spiritual meaning, so to use it to define another word, which by the way has a religious/spiritual meaning "marriage", implies a religious/spiritual definition!!!

I pointed out my lack of faith to possible point out WHY I was questioning the tabbing marriage as sacred....nothing more.

KaleidoscopeEyes1056

Oh, and why is marriage "sacred"? It is only a contract really, and contracts are broken or dissolved all the time. Of course, I'm an atheist and don't place the same importance on the word "marriage" many religious people might.

Of course, in a thread which has nothing to do with religion, the atheist has to let everyone know what his beliefs are.

Yup.

"How do you know if a person is an atheist?"

"Oh, don't worry--they'll TELL ya!"

Sounds about like Christians too, eh?

firstsip

You're right; none of us have any values.

I, too, miss the old marriage values of society. When women were forced to marry the men who raped them. Or when women were considered property and nothing more. Or when women couldn't marry someone of a different race.

Yup. No values today. We've only gone downhill.

jynxxxed

There are many people who agree that marriage is not 'sacred'. It's a piece of paper through the state and a commitment that you're making to eachother, but to most it isn't sacred. While I don't agree with cheating regardless of whether or not you have signed some papers in a court house, it's not really something that should concern you. It's between them.

sunsnstatheart

The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.

And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.

Don't post on the forums if you can't take criticism and open discussion. Not everyone agrees with your religious beliefs, and I certainly don't agree that you have somehow found the "truth" to morals and values as your claim that the "world's population is lacking morals and values" seems to imply if not openly state.

BondBomb

I don't think this is suddenly something that happened 'these days'. And it has little to do with the sanctity of marriage.
It is more about having respect for other human beings. Especially when you make a promise to them and ask them to become vulnerable to you. You don't need a piece of paper for that. It hurts the same without it.
Do I think people have less respect for relationships? Nope. I think they just have more ways of getting caught.

lorib75

The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.

And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.

This and only this.:flowerforyou: