Most hurtful comments
Replies
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While getting ready for a family function I was standing in my clothset complaining that I had nothing to wear because I put on so much weight when my husband yelled from the bedroom "ya, I would never let myself go like that". My response was not nice and he tried his hardest to back track but the damage was done.
That man really needs to get his filter checked.0 -
Some peope are a**holes. Thank goodness there's a variety of good people out there to make up for it.
You're gorgeous.0 -
I remember when I joined the gym once and these 2 guys walking by commented, "here come the New Years resolutions". They act like they are superior because they have fit bodies.
Wish I could have been there! I would have told them off! Especially since I used to be so big, and now those guys who would normally be talking crap, are now checking me out! Lolol.
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My parents telling me I look disgusting.0
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Oh my! I'm sorry that happened to you. I'm sure they were bullies in high school too. Sounds like they're just continuing their hateful behavior into adulthood. They're not happy with their own lives so they need someone to pick on. I know it's hard, but try to ignore lowlife bullies.
I ran into an former coworker of mine, that I had worked with five years earlier (and 20 pounds lighter). This former coworker was a big guy (I'm sure he would be classified as obese). After we said "Hi" and he introduced me to his wife, he asked when I was due. I was truly confused because no one had ever asked me that before, so I naively asked him what he was talking about, to which he said, "You're pregnant, aren't you?" Talk about crushing the ego! I was so mad, I said "No! Are you?" His wife, just shook her head at him and told him he was so stupid." to which he responded "I know I'm gonna get it when I get out to car." LOL! I know he wasn't trying to be rude, but I was still crushed.
Keep your chin up, girl. Losing weight isn't easy, but I know you can do it. I just joined MFP yesterday, so I'm looking forward to shedding excess weight by summer.0 -
Projection, darling. Only people who have some sort of insecurity need to make others feel bad. But then again, no one can make you feel bad without your consent.
Not always true (even, probably, rarely true). People enjoy exerting power over others for its own sake, insecurity not required.0 -
I'm sorry
Ignorance is everywhere. Don't let others bring you down. 0 -
When I hit puberty, my family became quite mean about my weight. They would make a noise as I crossed the living room "boom bapppa booom bappa boom" to mean that I made huge elephant steps. I mentioned it to my Mom years later, and she hardly even remembered it, She recalls that she was concerned about my weight because she also put on quite a bit when she hit puberty, and because her mother was also overweight at the time. As kids, we made jokes about our grandmother being like a manatee or a whale. I feel awful about it, and ashamed that we weren't taught to be kinder.0
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The worst is when it comes from family. Little comments, but comments --"Are you sure you want that cupcake?" or "Fatty" or whatever. Even though they are "joking" and "don't really mean it." I get it, we all need to be able to laugh at ourselves a little, but sometimes, it goes to far. And it's so frustrating when the people closest to you don't get it. GRRRR0
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Reminds me of a family reunion a few years back, when my loud opinionated grandmother who doesn't have an inner filter and has always been skinny (and who I hadn't seen in a few years) made a comment about my weight as soon as she saw me walk up... "you're getting kind of chunky" she said while she patted my hips. She always finds it necessary to comment on my weight, so I expected it and was ready. I quickly responded, "well, you're getting kind of wrinkly". Everyone around us cracked up and she hasn't said anything to me regarding my weight since then
Sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.0 -
Christmas shopping at toys r us and the young cashier asked me when I was due.... Made me so mad!0
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I think sometimes spouses start feeling insecure when we start losing weight and getting in shape, I recently ran into a guy I havent seen in about 6 months he said wow your getting the single woman body, this maybe why my hubby is so clingy lately,hmm.. at least it was a stranger- the one time I did get in the best shape of my life, my wife never complimented me. One night I asked her if she was happy about a 50lb fat loss and getting back in shape. She said " Sure, even if you look funny with no *kitten*" . I dont understand the resentment, and shes a pretty and fit woman so I dont get it. I think people are just mean sometimes.
Have you ever tried asking her why she's resentful? I really don't understand why she wouldn't be happy about it, unless she's worried you're trying to find someone else....... Lol..."single woman body." My husband has said "why are you trying to lose so much weight, you trying to find someone else?" I just told him the truth, that I need to get this weight off so I'm not a cripple in 10 years, cuz my joints are so bad, even though I told him from the beginning that was my plan, I guess he started getting worried. Then he asked another time who I'm trying to look good for, I told him you, and myself. Now I can't beat him off with a stick! Uggghhhh....love him, but seriously!0 -
"Lisa Michelly with the pot belly" here. People just don't realize how badly words hurt. Sooo sorry you and all the people here have had that kind of experience. Mean people suck. 0
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Most hurtful comment for me was when a customer had come into my office, whom I'd never met face to face, only by phone. Mind you, I was about half way to my goal weight and by no means fat. He says to me, "You're a very pretty girl for your size." I was in complete and utter shock. WTF? What am I, a friggin hippo? I'm no Barbie, but my heck I am NOT obese. I think people really just have no filter at all. Until you've been THAT person and know how it feels to be ridiculed and embarrassed, keep your dang mouth shut. My 4 year old even has enough common sense to not make comments outloud. She'll politely whisper to me, or tell me later, and I'll remind her that it's not nice to make fun of people. It hurts just as much to me as it does to anyone else. But my momma taught me right: If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all.0
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Christmas shopping at toys r us and the young cashier asked me when I was due.... Made me so mad!
Uggghhh!!!! YES!!! I HATED THAT CRAP!!! I always used to have people ask me if I was pregnant! I wanted to smack them!!!!0 -
It never ceases to amaze me how hurtfulband cruel people can be. I have managed to get down to a healthy bmi after weight slowly increasing after having my children.
However the person who comments on the amount i ate or who asks if i moved my 'fat wobble ' when I have been for a run is my mum who is morbidly obese, type 2 diabetic and had a leg amputated below the knee as a result. Everyone tells me I dont need to lise anymore weight but it scares the hell out of me that I Will end up like her.0 -
Quest for power is due to insecurity. I barely have control or power over myself... If I want control/power outside of that I'm creating an illusion and if I believe I have control outside of myself, then I'm delusional... Let others act how they will and do the best you can for you and them and find what real power can do in this world to heal its woes.
Projection, darling. Only people who have some sort of insecurity need to make others feel bad. But then again, no one can make you feel bad without your consent.
Not always true (even, probably, rarely true). People enjoy exerting power over others for its own sake, insecurity not required.0 -
After 5 kids I would like to hear hey wow you look great!!!! not wow you look great for someone who has had 5 kids. like if I had only 4 kids I would be disgusting, what???I just want to look good period the end.0
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People in this country have lost all sense of propriety. We live in a society of entitlement. Like saying something "because it's the Truth, and I can say whatever I want...".Calling something the Truth doesn't necessarily make it so. Being vicious for the "fun of it" is sick! We are faster to wound people than we are to aide them or praise them. Small egos really.
Being overweight myself for many times in my life, I have been called names as well. Somehow we remember those scars more than others. I think I learned to have a scathing wit based on some of my experiences.
Even occasionally on this website, (although it's not so much name calling, as it is "I am am right, and you aren't").
As Thumper's mother (in the Disney movie Bambi) told him, "if you can't say nuthin' good, don't say nuthin' at all!"0 -
Let's see...In my thinner days, "po", "anorexic", and once while shopping, I was told to go eat something. Rude questions about how much I weighed were often asked, and invitations to come to their house so they could feed me. Don't get me wrong. I do take free food, but an assumption shouldn't be made that just because a person is thin means they don't know how to cook.
In my larger days, I received a phone call from my youngest sister who I haven't heard from or seen since she mooched off me and left my apartment keys with someone I didn't know. It went something like this.
Me: Hello!
Sister: I heard you were fat.
Me: Ummmm, ok.
Sister: <Snicker>I'm still skinny.
Me: Wow, that's all you've accomplished. Then good for you!
I don't take any crap or snide remarks about my weight anymore.0 -
he kindly let me know that the buffets were open til midnight
That's the kind of moment I'd like to make a sarcastic comment like, "Well, somebody knows that latenight schedule well..."0 -
This isn't bad compared to yours, OP, but years ago when I was probably 30 pounds slimmer than now, I told my chiropractor that the move he was trying to do was hurting my ribs, and he said "most of the fat girls don't complain about their ribs."
I haven't seen him except in passing since.0 -
I'd rather be overweight than a pos.
I wish there was a "like" button for this comment.0 -
Some people are A***holes and should mind their own goddamn business and worry about themselves. I hate it when other people put others down to bring themselves up.
I am really sorry you had to go through that!0 -
When I hit puberty, my family became quite mean about my weight. They would make a noise as I crossed the living room "boom bapppa booom bappa boom" to mean that I made huge elephant steps. I mentioned it to my Mom years later, and she hardly even remembered it, She recalls that she was concerned about my weight because she also put on quite a bit when she hit puberty, and because her mother was also overweight at the time. As kids, we made jokes about our grandmother being like a manatee or a whale. I feel awful about it, and ashamed that we weren't taught to be kinder.
I know what you mean. My Mom was always being mean about how big I was growing up, too. One time, her and my cousin were doing dishes, and I was cleaning off the table. She turned to me and asked me to go get something for her. When I came back, I told her I couldn't find it, and she said, "yeah, the only thing you can find is food!" That one really hurt, obviously since I still remember her exact words almost 30 years later. She had always been pretty thin when I was growing up...now the tables have turned, and I hate to admit it, but it kind of feels good!
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Got some fava beans and a nice chianti? Just to make um think...he kindly let me know that the buffets were open til midnight
That's the kind of moment I'd like to make a sarcastic comment like, "Well, somebody knows that latenight schedule well..."0 -
It's sad and pathetic that people feel they have the right to shame and belittle others. Do people not stop to think at all anymore? It's not okay to discriminate in any situation but no one would get away with making racist or sexist comments these days. Body size however is fair game evidently! It's pathetic. How would he feel if it was his wife, his son, his daughter, mother or father that was spoken to in this manner? Honestly! I feel sorry for him. Body sizes can go up or down but ignorant *kitten* will never change.0
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0P ...You shouldn't have to waste the energy doing the following but you will enjoy it
A) good kick to the nuts
cuff up the side of the head
C) extend middle finder (either hand or both ok)
D) the most important part.... SMILE.... as you leave!0 -
It is truly sad that people are so mean. Stuff like this used to make me wanna cut a *****. LOL. Still does.
However, I try to have compassion for people like this. Bullies are usually sad, angry and abused people. They learned to be awful as a response to being mistreated by someone. Seriously. Imagine how broken you would have to be to speak so unkindly to another person.
So, when I am hurt by someone, I pray for them. Its something I learned in recovery. Having compassion for people who are so small minded and mean spirited can be very healing.
So next time some douschbag feels the need to share some of their misery with you, try praying that they are blessed.
If that doesn’t work….
CUT A *****.0 -
When I was in high school, the boys would call me mean names because I was so flat chested.
Fast forward several years, and two kids later, and I have to admit, the "girls" really grew on me, if ya know what I mean. And all WITHOUT surgery.
I went back home and saw some of those boys a couple years ago.
Needless to say, it took a mop and a bucket to wipe the drool off the floor.
Heh, heh, heh.0
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