Guys that are a 3 trying to be with girls that are an 8...

Lift_hard_eat_big

Men can be a zero in the looks department. But if he's got power and money he can pull 10's all day. Many of those women are thirsty tricks! For example, Hue Hefner, Lil Wayne. Can you honestly say that if they didnt have money and power that they would still be able to pull the same women with their personality alone?

DarkAngel262

I'm not going to rate guys or pick someone just on their looks. I've had that happen to me most of my life. Not nice.

Danny_Boy13

I'm a 3

My momma told me to shoot for the stars.

This = Winning!!! *Thumbs Up*

Cait_Sidhe

Fortunately, I've never been good at math. I'm attracted to what I'm attracted to.

HJMAYES

Shallow Hal. Best...movie....ever....

subconscious_ink

I don't really believe in being in someone's "league". But a lot of people do.
Unfortunately, a lot of people think they "deserve" a certain type.....in a shallow way. They'll hold out for "arm candy" and will miss out on some really great people.

I don't believe in "leagues" based on looks. I do think that there are vague sort of leagues created by things like job type, maturity, education, etc.

For example, I am currently an (for now) unemployed college student with an undecided major. I'm taking a year off from college to get my health back in order and decide what I want to do with my life, and am currently looking for any random job to make some money.

I know a guy who is very fit, a doctor, and owns a horse farm. Plus, he's a genuinely nice, caring person. Given all of those attributes, I would say he's currently "out of my league" (if I were interested and if he didn't have a girlfriend already - hypothetical example). But I feel like "leagues" are a package deal, not just about looks.

Erin_goBrahScience

Also to everyone saying that they don't 'rate' people based on any kind of scale... combination of looks, personality, finances, responsibility, etc.... Then either the maybe 5% of the population that doesn't, has ALL magically congregated together here in the MFP threads, or you guys are just lying to yourselves...

I think "rate" might be the wrong word.

I do believe that we DO however judge everyone around us...we make assumptions and assertations without getting to know everyone we come into contact with. I believe that it is just human nature to do so.

But in terms of dating, I believe that I was pretty open.

I went out with a guy who was 5'4 (what he said online, it was closer to 5'2 and I am 5'10), but he made me laugh (btw he told me I wasn't his type, after our only date)

I have also dated:

fat guys
fit guys
bald(ing) guys
guys with back hair
an alcoholic
an actor
a guy who was 28 and still living at home
single dad
pilot
musician
nurse
a best friend
writer (married that one)

and many more...

But if we had a general interest in each other, a date never hurts. As I saw it you go out and see what happens. I honestly didn't think I would have ended up with my husband. I thought he was funny and when he asked me out I said sure, never in a million years would I have thought that he would be everything I was looking for. But we just work.

JUDDDing

Some of it might be the way we view ourselves. Since I can't speak for the whole of the male sex - of the guys I know - I think we'd all consider ourselves 7+ on a holistic scale. Even if we're not beautiful or fit, we're at least smart or successful (funny, etc).

And not to paint with too broad of a brush, but often, bigger and/or less attractive single girls, in my experience, especially 30+, tend to not be particularly happy, confident or outgoing (which are very attractive traits to guys too) - at least not with people they just meet/meet "on the street".

Those that are happy, confident and outgoing seem to form relationships just fine.

fmebear

Why rate anyone? We all see things differently. Maybe that is what is turning the men off - you are judging just as you hate them judging you and other women. Why not work on being yourself and being confident? I believe confidence, personality works far better in attraction than being shallow on the looks.

MyM0wM0w

Good luck. Wait until you get to 40 and they only want 8-10s who are 25 year olds.

That said, imo there are a lot of factors to 'rating' a person. It's not just looks. It's personality, level of confidence, sustainability(as in, am I going to have to support his *kitten*?), sense of humor.

It's grading on a curve!

*sorry, had a few extra cups of coffee this morning. Not sure what i'm saying.

markpmc

I held out and married waay up Guess I'm a dill-hole.

chocl8girl

SwimFan1981

Love!

laural007

Me so confused.

Dani76babi

What are the criteria that makes up this rating scale? How would I know what number someone is? And isnt it a bit biased if I were to rate myself?

penrbrown

Am I the only one amused by the fact that a forum community that has 'rate me threads' is getting upset with OP because she rates people???

ROFL!

MireyGal76

What are the criteria that makes up this rating scale? How would I know what number someone is? And isnt it a bit biased if I were to rate myself?

haha - all you have to do is go into the "Rate the person above you only if you can handle the trut" threads... everyone is an 8, 9 or 10!

firstsip

Am I the only one amused by the fact that a forum community that has 'rate me threads' is getting upset with OP because she rates people???

ROFL!

I would say many of these people don't go in those threads for the same reasons as said here. Perhaps OP should venture in there, though.

diodelcibo

What are the criteria that makes up this rating scale? How would I know what number someone is? And isnt it a bit biased if I were to rate myself?

haha - all you have to do is go into the "Rate the person above you only if you can handle the trut" threads... everyone is an 8, 9 or 10!

or eleventy.

angelams1019

But I feel like myself, and a lot of other single girls I know, all know that we aren't 10s and aren't under any false pre-tenses that we could get a guy that looks like Channing Tatum... we tend to be pretty realistic about the guys that we will 'go after' but continue to get NO RESPONSE from a lot of these guys either. But, yes I'm overweight... I keep full-length, current pics up on dating websites so that people 'know what they're getting'. (Profile pic was taken earlier this month... I know I'm not a Katherine Heigl... but didn't think I was 'make small children weep' ugly either?) I have been fully supporting myself financially since I graduated college at 22... I live on my own, I have been working a full time job that makes enough to pay all of my own bills, have a little 'fun money' and put some in savings since I graduated college. I know how to cook and clean for myself, am able to drive my own car etc, and I feel like I'm pretty reasonable about looks in general, as well as body types of guys that are 'in my league Yet it seem like even these guys are all holding out for only the beautiful girls.

I think you should really give yourself more credit hun. For guys that aren't interested in you, just keep it moving. There are people out there that think you're MORE beautiful than Katherine Heigl! Beauty is 100% relative. You have to accept that.

It makes me really sad to read that you don't look at yourself and think you're "a 10"....You refer to "the beautiful girls" as if you're not in that category. My biggest suggestion to you would be to put the dating aside and start doing some work on the inside to figure out why you think you're not beautiful.

As cliche as it sounds, the saying is true. You really have to learn to love yourself before you can ever be successful in love with anyone else. You'll much much happier in long run...With or without a boyfriend. :flowerforyou:

Awkward30

What are the criteria that makes up this rating scale? How would I know what number someone is? And isnt it a bit biased if I were to rate myself?

haha - all you have to do is go into the "Rate the person above you only if you can handle the trut" threads... everyone is an 8, 9 or 10!

or eleventy.

You are definitely eleventy.

Am I allowed to say that I don't think the OP is an 8?

OP: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Just because you don't find those men attractive doesn't mean that you're hotter than them.

quirkytizzy

I would say many of these people don't go in those threads for the same reasons as said here. Perhaps OP should venture in there, though.

I stay out of those threads because, despite my wish to think I wouldn't, I would probably get all butt-hurt. So I just stay out of them and don't have to deal with any funny feelings that may result.

Problem solved.

desiv2

But I feel like myself, and a lot of other single girls I know, all know that we aren't 10s and aren't under any false pre-tenses that we could get a guy that looks like Channing Tatum... we tend to be pretty realistic about the guys that we will 'go after' but continue to get NO RESPONSE from a lot of these guys either. But, yes I'm overweight... I keep full-length, current pics up on dating websites so that people 'know what they're getting'. (Profile pic was taken earlier this month... I know I'm not a Katherine Heigl... but didn't think I was 'make small children weep' ugly either?) I have been fully supporting myself financially since I graduated college at 22... I live on my own, I have been working a full time job that makes enough to pay all of my own bills, have a little 'fun money' and put some in savings since I graduated college. I know how to cook and clean for myself, am able to drive my own car etc, and I feel like I'm pretty reasonable about looks in general, as well as body types of guys that are 'in my league Yet it seem like even these guys are all holding out for only the beautiful girls.

I think you should really give yourself more credit hun. For guys that aren't interested in you, just keep it moving. There are people out there that think you're MORE beautiful than Katherine Heigl! Beauty is 100% relative. You have to accept that.

It makes me really sad to read that you don't look at yourself and think you're "a 10"....You refer to "the beautiful girls" as if you're not in that category. My biggest suggestion to you would be to put the dating aside and start doing some work on the inside to figure out why you think you're not beautiful.

As cliche as it sounds, the saying is true. You really have to learn to love yourself before you can ever be successful in love with anyone else. You'll much much happier in long run...With or without a boyfriend. :flowerforyou:

This.

firstsip

I would say many of these people don't go in those threads for the same reasons as said here. Perhaps OP should venture in there, though.

I stay out of those threads because, despite my wish to think I wouldn't, I would probably get all butt-hurt. So I just stay out of them and don't have to deal with any funny feelings that may result.

Problem solved.

You're a 10 in my book, quirky. :flowerforyou:

SpeSHul_SnoflEHk

I don't know what you're talking about. I refuse to date any of the little people whether they be a 3, or a 10. They're just all below me.

MelStren

Some women find a man attractive if he is stable and able to support her financially. I dated cute jerks and they did nothing for me. I decided on a mature older guy who was college educated, motivated and treated me like a princess. I have no regrets. He has supported me emotionaly, financially and put me through college without me having to work. I say that overrates looks on every level, I am a big fan of security. If it was all about passion I would still be with my cheating ex. Also a great personality can bump your number ten fold in my opinion. That's not to say you don't have to be attracted to your significant other on some level, but good character just enhances appeal.

Ditto!

chubbygirl253

I met my fiance online dating, and generally found what you described to be true. Until I went to a plus-size dating site. Once I did that, the game changed. Once the men who were looking for a thin gal were out of the running, the ones that were on that site could see the real me. I think it's possible to be on a plus-size site and be clear in your objective to get healthy and find a partner interested in the same.

sunsnstatheart

Oh yay. Let's shame ALL OF THE BODIES.

I prefer to whisper sweet nothings to mine

jr1985

What are the criteria that makes up this rating scale? How would I know what number someone is? And isnt it a bit biased if I were to rate myself?

haha - all you have to do is go into the "Rate the person above you only if you can handle the trut" threads... everyone is an 8, 9 or 10!

or eleventy.

You are definitely eleventy.

Am I allowed to say that I don't think the OP is an 8?

OP: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Just because you don't find those men attractive doesn't mean that you're hotter than them.

Uh If you'll read the original post, I never said that I was an 8... Haven't you been paying attention to the posts? I clearly rank somewhere in the Troll category, with the personality of Adolph Hitler for being the only person on MFP who considers anyone else, within my league or not within my league. At least I have my cats to keep me company...

crazy4lulu

have we ever heard of the saying " you cant judge a book by its cover"? Apparently... not!!!