All I see is a moster and I dont want that anymore.

fitfreakymom

One key thing in losing weight is SLEEP so go to bed lol

barb1241

NO.

You are gorgeous! And your sweetie thinks so too. Don't ever think that you are beneath someone. It's easy to say, not so easy to do, but trust his judgement of you-and learn to love yourself. There are meds that can help with your bi-polar if you choose that direction, or therapy for at least the depressed paret, not sure about the manic part. AND-if you can start exercising, little by little, you will become more fit and it also helps with your mental condition by helping your brain to produce happy chemicals.

Giving up is NOT an option.

If you need a friend, you can add me for support.

smantha32

There's no giving up allowed here. Ever.

kymarai

You are a beautiful young lady. You can do this if you want it. Exercise doesn't have to cost anything. Jumping jacks, punches, stairs, even dancing. As for the 30 DS Dvd, you don't need a mat or wieghts. A towel on the floor (if not carpeted) will work as mat. cans of soup work as weights. You have to do this for you. Think of one thing that makes you happy each day, put it on a post it note and put on mirror. The sun shining, your glossy hair, the bright eyes, a special song. Blessings all around. Take advantage of that and make one goal a day. Dancing for 1 song, drinking water before anything else, only eating one of something. You CAN do this if you want! Best of luck in your endevor!

BogQueen1

Dead serious when I say this. I look at your picture, I look at you saying you have 135 lbs to lose, and I wonder.... where the heck are you going to lose that much weight from. You say you are 5'7? I think your goal may not be realistic. Why not set a baby step goal of 15 lbs? And honestly, your ultimate real goal? May only be 100 lbs, it may be 90 lbs. But I think 135 lbs is possibly... way too much.

That said, best of luck to you, you aren't a monster. You are quite lovely with beautiful blue eyes. Try and accept that he must find you beautiful or he wouldn't be there! You are so worth it!

Sakura_Tree

Hello! Just wanted to let you know that I think you are a very pretty girl and you don't look anywhere near obese to me. If you exercise and eat healthy you will be the way you want in no time! plus you will feel happier the more weight you lose If your BF likes you for you, which it seems he does then you shouldn't feel insecure when your working out together. As for your loss I am very sorry to hear,just keep your chin up:). Losing weight is tough but its totally worth it.. toodles

cmriverside

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monicalosesweight

Just wanted to say you can do this! You must have something going for you or you're current boyfriend wouldn't be with you - think about that one. Also, you can eat right - start looking at the cheaper alternatives like beans and rice and veggies. As for exercise, do you have access to a library? If yes, you could borrow dvd's with workouts that don't require a lot of equipment. Heck, I went walking for the first three months and just counted calories and I lost weight.

As for the medication, there's nothing wrong with meds if they are needed. I have a girlfriend whose on anti-depressants and she told me it was the only thing helping her get through the day. It's entirely possible that it may be a hormonal imbalance and that's what some meds treat. If they help, there is nothing humiliating about taking meds. Heck, I have massive allergies and take Zyrtec daily and other meds - I know my skin rashes are difficult to treat but I'm not embarrassed...it's part of my life. Do what you need to do to build self confidence - medicate or not medicate - there's nothing horrible about either - but do what's right for you.

As for the jobs, you may want to look at what you're applying for and look at what you're wearing. Could you be wearing clothing that's not appropriate for the job interview - not formal enough? Also, you could practice interviewing with a friend and have them play the part of employer and maybe videotape yourself to see how you react...you may be so nervous that you're blowing the interview due to nerves. Once you can figure it out..practice until you see how you react and have your friends give you criticism. Never give up! It's a tough job market everywhere so it's not your weight - could be just fierce competition as well.

Monica

kcoftx

My younger self didn't appreciate my own beauty at all. My older self has started to understand that while visual has a part, the real power is in the ability to show confidence. Sometimes you gotta fake it until you make it. Part of that is stopping the negative train. Learn to look around you and realize that true beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. The main attractor is really about how you hold yourself. Hold your head up high, smile, and don't dress slouchy. You don't have to be a model. Heck, I currently have 1.5 inch of gray roots showing and I managed to get a look today. Part of me wonders why I didn't realize this before I started showing wrinkles, my hair started drying out and before my body started showing some signs of aging. Oh yeah, I was young and didn't know. I'm here to share the secret with you. Be a woman. Be proud of it. Learn to work with what you got. Learn to love yourself and your own beauty. You can work on it, but be sure you project the real secret--confidence. You will be surprised at just how powerful this really is.

Furthermore, you can read through the threads here and they will all say the same thing. Different people are attracted to different types. That goes for women and men. Media portrays one thing but trust me when I say, you got the right stuff right now. Your honey is already telling you that. If you want to work on the weight, do it for health and for yourself but know that right now you already have beauty. All you got to do is BELIEVE IT and show that you believe it. That may take some work. Guess what--many of us are late bloomers when it comes to self-esteem. You wouldn't be the only one. The good news is you can take this little gem and start working on it. YOU have the power to make that happen. Go forth and be the beautiful woman you are.

primpixie

Awww babygirl your breaking my heart consider yourself hugged.:flowerforyou: Brave of you to put a voice to your feelings. Your a beautiful girl with your whole wonderful life ahead of you. so that said as me as your friend and I can take a look at your dairy and see what your eating , and what kind of workouts are you doing weights ? cardio?

I agree. And also if it's any help I am a manic depressive too - so get the constant inner questions and roller coaster ride in our heads. I've also had the roller coaster rides of eating too much and then the complete opposite - this site virtually saved me.

If your boyfriend was way above your league - why is he with you? He loves you for you. He is attracted to you. Have you spoken to him about your doubts? I bet he has no idea how or why you are belittling yourself and no doubt will be hurt too.

There are some really supportive people on this site and I am sure between us all we can help you out, but ultimately it is you who does the work.
PP

Nutella91

you're pretty and your boyfriend is cute. you can lose all the weight, just work hard enough

RachyLovesRattys

You are absolutely not a monster- but deep down i feel like you know that. Depression is a hell of a mindset killer, and with a bad mindset, it's hard to be motivated to lose the weight. First off, I don't think you're disgustingly overweight at all- you have a normal body that by "standards" is deemed unhealthy. I've been "overweight" by those same standards all my life because of my bone structure being so large. What really matters is how you FEEL!

That being said, start walking! Find a farmer's market and pick up some cheap veggies and fruits. And I definitely do recommend yoga! I find it is a great step towards the mental health aspect of fitness WHILE doing something for your physical body as well. And no need for yoga mats or anything fancy. A plain old towel on the ground and a book of yoga poses from the library is just as good for you! Or go on the internet and do them in front of your computer.

Being healthy does not need to cost a lot of money. If you really put it into perspective- it's unhealthy eating that's really costly. Since i've started eating healthier, i've actually saved money (mainly from not gorging on fast food and eating out- it really adds up!) And i'm a broke college student

MadamUnique

Once again, thanks for the replies. But thread's closed.. could an ADMIN please remove it? ♥♥

schaskes

I agree with the the other people who have said DON'T GIVE UP! Focus on teeny changes, including eating 1/2 bag of chips instead of the whole bag. Listen to your favorite up-beat music whenever you start to feel down. Read a favorite book or poem. Jog in place for five minutes or do jumping jacks. And most importantly, be good to yourself!