Stop the Fat Bashing!
Replies
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sounds like you didnt need to rant.. You already got it figured out! You go girl!
-from a felllow REAL women.. haha
what does "REAL woman" mean?
Because i'm not overweight i'm less of a woman?
Technically, yes. A woman with a mass of 100lbs is less of a woman than one with a mass of 125lbs. :laugh:0 -
anyone else see the irony in here?
Yep. I do. Sad, isn't it?
it is *le sigh*
Haha!! Some people want only to *****... they will always find something.0 -
sounds like you didnt need to rant.. You already got it figured out! You go girl!
-from a felllow REAL women.. haha
what does "REAL woman" mean?
Because i'm not overweight i'm less of a woman?
That is how I took that comment too. I guess I strive to be a "fake woman"0 -
I'll admit after reading the first 7 responses, I didn't read others so apologies if I'm restating what someone else may have said. I'm sorry for the responses that took up space on your thread to take up their own rant.
Anyway, post away - it's why the forums are here. Ignore the haters (here and offline) and keep doing what's working for you. Which in this case, it sounds like that's moving a lot and making great food decisions. Whatever you perceive they're thinking may or may not be accurate, but it doesn't matter in my opinion, it's how you feel about it.
So... congratulations on making wise decisions, wearing what's comfortable, and strutting your stuff. Keep it up!0 -
IMO it sounds like you are a bit paranoid. How can you tell what someone is thinking by looking at them?
I wish you success girl! Hold your head up and don't worry about others may or may not be thinking. Keep it up!0 -
It'S funny that the op started a thread about fat bashing and then someone over weight starts skinny bashing with a comment about being a real woman lol.0
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sounds like you didnt need to rant.. You already got it figured out! You go girl!
-from a felllow REAL women.. haha
What makes a real women vs a fake one? I don't get it.
Humungous knockers.
DARNIT!0 -
I've been 314 pounds and now I'm 183. What I've found is that most of the time people are thinking about themselves and their concerns, not me. And not you either. On the off chance they are thinking hateful things, who the hell cares? The world is not out to get you.
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.
That quote explains a good lot about the world. Mark the rest under X Files for inexplicable and move on.0 -
About the whole "real woman" thing...given that the poster never came back, I'm guessing it was just used to be an encouraging silly expression to cheer up OP. maybe by "real" she meant taking care of herself and not judging. Who knows? It would still work. So much offense is being taken to that comment while in turn telling OP she's being too sensitive about offhand comments or looks. Someone makes ONE "real woman" comment not directed at anyone and with no clear reason and everyone pounced on it and took offense! Take some of the advice you gave OP!
That being said, OP, you really do seem to be projecting and I know how that goes. My poor boyfriend can't compliment a part of my body without me taking it as backhand slang for calling me chubby. And I'm not fishing for compliments, it genuinely gets me down and makes me sad if he calls my thighs "shapely". Nuts, right? Just as nuts as letting a look from a stranger ruin your whole day. Stay in this for YOU. I totally understand that those insecurities can not be let go in one day but work on it as best you can and hang in there
My two cents about the skinny actresses and when that became sexy or whatevs... I really don't know how to tell, but some of them honestly look underweight. If health is everyone's goal, I think promoting a healthful body image, particularly to younger girls is an okay thing. I wish someone had told me when I was ten and a perfectly normal weight that my thighs didn't have to look like an actresses to still be healthy and attractive. I obsessed over it! Just a thought, not meant to be bashing at all!0 -
sounds like you didnt need to rant.. You already got it figured out! You go girl!
-from a felllow REAL women.. haha
What makes a real women vs a fake one? I don't get it.
Humungous knockers.
DARNIT!
Don't fret....just go buy some.
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Don't fret....just go buy some.
That's probably one of the most awesome knockers I have ever seen.0 -
Don't fret....just go buy some.
That's probably one of the most awesome knockers I have ever seen.
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Please, teach me how to read minds.
Maybe you had a booger, or perhaps your fly was down. Maybe you looked like that ***** that cut them off the other day.
Well put. Unless you can read minds, you can't be sure what those people were thinking. I know when I see somebody obese working out, I look at it as motivation and cheer them on (in my head). However, I'm known for having a natural scowl for a facial expression. So, if you saw me, you may think I was being judgemental when the whole time you've motivated me.0 -
Seriously? You are interpreting people LOOKING at you in a negative way.
I'll be honest....you need to change your mindset.
^I agree with this^.
Just for fun, why not trying thinking that what they are 'saying with their eyes/looks' is something positive.0 -
When I'm at the gym I can't help but look at other people. I do that cause most of the time the things that are on TV are not interesting and I can't hear it anyways. With that said, I see all kinds of people with different body types but I can't help but notice the people who obviously weigh more. And you know what I think when I see them? "You go girl or man!!!" When I think somebody is looking at me, I strut my stuff because I feel hot (not sweaty lol) and they may or may not be thinking that but I tell myself that. Because like everyone who's there working out, we're all doing the same thing, trying to be healthy and stay that way. Let people bash because as long as you stay confident and focused that's all that matters. YOU GO GIRL!! Do your thing.0
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Bashing happens to everyone regardless of how perfect they may be. Look at all the "perfect" figures of actresses. They get bashed by people saying that it's lipo, plastic surgery, ED disorder, etc.
If one defines themselves based on the opinions of others, they will find people that love them and people that hate them. Stick with the ones that love you.
A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition0 -
I dont give a F**K!! what people think of me or what i think their thinking of me. i'm just doing whats best for ME and mine.. i dont disrepect anyone,or judge anyone by what they say, do or look.. just do you!! be kind to others even if their not kind to you. life's to short.. I love you all...
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I have no issue with you complaining or ranting, but everything in your post was literally about the "stares" you get from other people. It's possible insecurities leach out and attach themselves to the eyes of other people. Someone might be looking at you without even seeing you because they're zoned out. Someone might look at your food because they're hungry too.
Is it possible that people are intentionally giving you disdainful looks? Yes, it is... but your entire rant is about all these different scenarios of what *you* think people are thinking. That's a dangerous game, to make assumptions like that.
Hell, someone else might come in and say, "Stop the fat bashing! Don't avert your eyes from me just because of my weight!"
Perception can be a real b.
^ this is how I read it too. look up cognitive therapy on google and please please please don't take this the wrong way. it's for your own good, honestly. I see lots of people really big at lots of gyms since I'm gym shopping and I'm big right now too but even when I was skinny I've never thought this way about people. wait let me take off my halo for a second. OK one time when an idiot nearly ran me over with his truck at the grocery store and my boyfriend warned him and he got mad at my boyfriend at the time, and it was clearly his fault and was lucky to have the warning instead of a lawsuit and my flattened butt on the ground, i called that man a f'at *kitten* which everyone found hilarious because this was before i had gone to the dark side. Okay halo back on. So anyway i don't think it's healthy to go around thinking everyone is thinking so many mean things about you all the time. I don't even think it's likely.0 -
I was thinking, "I wish I could tell what everyone was thinking just by looking at them." With those kinds of powers you should be a professional poker player.Seriously? You are interpreting people LOOKING at you in a negative way.
I'll be honest....you need to change your mindset. 0 -
Ya know, when I was at my heaviest I felt like people were glaring at me and so what I did to fix that was.... just not look at them. Smile and just do your thing and don't focus on other people. It has worked for me. 0
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Good for you, I'm glad that other people's criticism hasn't put you off.
I do know the feeling though, when I tell my friends that I cannot have certain foods because I'm trying to 'get in shape' {I avoid the word 'diet' at all costs} there are some people I know who wave chocolate bars in my face, no joke. It's so annoying but I guess we'll be the ones laughing soon enough hey ? 0 -
About the whole "real woman" thing...given that the poster never came back, I'm guessing it was just used to be an encouraging silly expression to cheer up OP. maybe by "real" she meant taking care of herself and not judging. Who knows? It would still work. So much offense is being taken to that comment while in turn telling OP she's being too sensitive about offhand comments or looks. Someone makes ONE "real woman" comment not directed at anyone and with no clear reason and everyone pounced on it and took offense! Take some of the advice you gave OP!
That's what I was thinking...0 -
I love it when I see big people working out. I think, "There's someone trying to make a change."
Ditto0 -
About the whole "real woman" thing...given that the poster never came back, I'm guessing it was just used to be an encouraging silly expression to cheer up OP. maybe by "real" she meant taking care of herself and not judging. Who knows? It would still work. So much offense is being taken to that comment while in turn telling OP she's being too sensitive about offhand comments or looks. Someone makes ONE "real woman" comment not directed at anyone and with no clear reason and everyone pounced on it and took offense! Take some of the advice you gave OP!
Exactly.But a couple people who responded,only say insulting and mocking things the forums.0 -
what does "REAL woman" mean?
Because i'm not overweight i'm less of a woman?
Technically, yes. A woman with a mass of 100lbs is less of a woman than one with a mass of 125lbs. :laugh:
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:shrug: Can't argue with the man's logic...0 -
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Bashing happens to everyone regardless of how perfect they may be. Look at all the "perfect" figures of actresses. They get bashed by people saying that it's lipo, plastic surgery, ED disorder, etc.
If one defines themselves based on the opinions of others, they will find people that love them and people that hate them. Stick with the ones that love you.
A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
Exactly.0 -
Remember: If people want to diss you, they'll find something. It doesn't matter if you're fat, thin, pretty, homely, smart, dumb- something will be fuel for the fire. Grabbing the low-hanging fruit, like zeroing in on someone's appearance, requires no thought or creativity and is the lamest of the lame when it comes to finding insultable attributes.0
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I don't understand.... If you have a vagina and uterus.... Aren't you a real woman???
And in accordance to the curvy/fat comment.... Yes, you can be curvy and thin, you can be curvy and fat too.0 -
On days I feel bad about myself and think I look horrible, I interpret any person looking at me as staring because they think I'm hideous.
And whenever I feel like I look amazing, I'm sure people looking at me are thinking that I look amazing.
But the meaning you give to people looking at you is something you make up in your mind, and it has nothing to do with what they're actually thinking. I think you'd find you don't judge other people as much as you think you're being judged, and maybe it's just your insecurities that are causing you to think that way. Maybe try not to concern yourself so much with what strangers might or might not think about you because you're overweight... Have that confidence and self-respect and don't give a damn. And I'm sure you'll feel better already. 0
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