Why do men sabotage wife or girlfriends weight loss?

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  • kjohnson754
    kjohnson754 Posts: 54 Member
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    You can't put that on him. If you're determined, he can eat what he wants and it won't stop you. That's like wanting everyone in the world to diet so that you can eat healthy.
  • MorgueBabe
    MorgueBabe Posts: 1,188 Member
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    I don't think they do.
  • KatLifter
    KatLifter Posts: 1,314 Member
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    Why do women put it on the internet to complain instead of addressing the issue directly?
  • wellbert
    wellbert Posts: 3,924 Member
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    I don't want her to get skinny and leave me. She takes a lot of protein powder. So I put in a couple cups of sugar in the protein powder and mixed it in.

    Also we buy bottles of soda. I dump out the diet and put in regular soda.

    I buy 80% beef and tell her it's 93% lean.

    Also, I set her HRM to say she weighs 700lbs so she thinks she burns way more calories than she does, so she eats them back.


    So far it's working really well. In fact, she's gained a little weight.

    where would you even come up with this stuff?

    Just clever, I guess.
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    Politely offering to share something is one thing; holding it in someone's face after they've already said no is an entirely different thing. :(

    Exactly. Glad someone said it... I was thinking no one actually read the OP's entire post there for a second...

    OK, yeah, that's seriously messed up and rude that he's waving it in your face after you said no!!
    If my husband or anyone did that to me I'd punch'em in the throat!

    Talk to him and tell him that's not acceptable.

    Really? I read OP's post and saw, "He seems hurt when I reject his offering, and follows up with, 'Are you sure?'" He's still not sabotaging. He's probably hurt because, as is said IN EVERY POST LIKE THIS, food is a communal act. Many people view offering anything as a sign of love. He's taking enjoyment out of something, and he wants to share it with you. He then doesn't wave it in front of your face saying, "Ooooh, yummy! Doesn't it just look soooooo good?" he said, "Are you sure?" and then did what?... Proceeded to eat it, right? Wanting to make sure you wouldn't be upset later that said treat or offering or whatever was gone.

    Yeah, sure sounds like an awful guy.
  • deksgrl
    deksgrl Posts: 7,237 Member
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    I don't want her to get skinny and leave me. She takes a lot of protein powder. So I put in a couple cups of sugar in the protein powder and mixed it in.

    Also we buy bottles of soda. I dump out the diet and put in regular soda.

    I buy 80% beef and tell her it's 93% lean.

    Also, I set her HRM to say she weighs 700lbs so she thinks she burns way more calories than she does, so she eats them back.


    So far it's working really well. In fact, she's gained a little weight.

    where would you even come up with this stuff?

    I dunno but it made me LOL.
  • ArroganceInStep
    ArroganceInStep Posts: 6,239 Member
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    Threads like this make me happy I married the woman I did...
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
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    I know exactly how you feel.

    I have a friend (he's even on MFP!!!) that sabotages me daily. Tells me to eat more, acts disappointed when I don't get a burrito AND 20 tacos (true story), and he is constantly trying to get me to eat high calorie foods. He also is always showing pictures of all these high calorie looking gigantic portion sized meals that he eats. WHY IS HE TRYING TO MAKE ME FAT?! :sad:
    I love you, Ariel.


    I forgive you. :heart:
    You were never mad to begin with.
  • kristinlc88
    kristinlc88 Posts: 63 Member
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    Being responsible for my own life is hard...
  • 5stringjeff
    5stringjeff Posts: 790 Member
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    I know!! Like when you are so good all day and then when you are sleeping they inject chicken fat into your veins!!

    :laugh:

    /thread
  • surromom2010
    surromom2010 Posts: 457 Member
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    Him enjoying his junk food is not sabotage. You're on a diet, not him.

    However, if he is waving food in your face knowing you dont' want it and making you uncomfortable, make it very clear that is unacceptable. That's just rude.

    I agree with this, Offering something to someone is one thing, shoving it in their face after they say no thanks is a di** move.

    It's also extremely rude to spend a ton of money making a dinner that is extremely unhealthy when you know your SO is dieting, and then complaining when they make something else. It's fine that they make it, I'm happy to cook something different, but I shouldn't catch an attitude for not eating something you KNEW I wasn't going to want before you made it
  • ladymiseryali
    ladymiseryali Posts: 2,555 Member
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    Take the chocolate bar he is "waving in front of your face" and stick it up his nose!

    Ouch......but then he will always smell chocolate...
  • AngryDiet
    AngryDiet Posts: 1,349 Member
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    Perhaps he's a closet chubby chaser.
  • Ibarra951
    Ibarra951 Posts: 19 Member
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    Being responsible for my own life is hard...

    Well said. I don't think it's men sabotaging wives, or vice versa. This is purely a case by case basis. Address the issue directly with your partner, and if he/she doesn't want to compromise, your going to have to make a change somewhere. Whether it be partners, or diet. It's your life, take the helm.
  • doubleduofa
    doubleduofa Posts: 284 Member
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    Your boyfriend sounds unsupportive and immature. I lived with a man like this and it was terrible. He was manipulative and eventually many "behaviors" like this turned into flat out emotional abuse. I'm kind of surprised many people think this is ok behavior. I would never flaunt food in someone's face, whether they were dieting or not. Yes, I'd offer to be nice, but to guilt someone because they said no? Ridiculous. Not funny.

    You have to take responsibility for yourself now. Tell him no and walk away. If he gets mad, oh well. Yes, this is difficult when you've been conditioned to feel bad for everything. Sometimes, you need someone else to say, "yes, I agree, that's messed up behavior," because you don't trust yourself anymore. So yes, it's messed up. Now it's your turn to determine why you are putting up with it.
  • DeeVanderbles
    DeeVanderbles Posts: 589 Member
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    I really think guys can't win. If he didn't offer to share he'd be selfish and uncaring about your needs. Just cause your on a diet doesn't mean he is. Have self-control, say no thanks and move on with your day.

    I love your tattoo!!


    OP - that's when you break out your own snack of something deliciously healthy and shove it in his face. :wink: like some celery or air popped popcorn.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
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    Threads like this make me happy I married the woman I did...

    Thread like this make me happy I don't have a girlfriend.
  • fatemaali4
    fatemaali4 Posts: 3
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    He's probably just happy with the way you look already and doesnt feel the need to push you to lose weight :)
  • ravenstar25
    ravenstar25 Posts: 126 Member
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    I'm sorry, I disagree with all the people who say it isn't sabotage. It really is. It doesn't mean you can't resist it, but if you know someone is watching their weight and are constantly pushing fattening food in their face after they ask you repeatedly to stop, they are trying to sabotage you. I'm dealing with it at home and I have to be polite because we've been married 9 years and I don't want to fight about it but it's very frustrating.
  • hannyz08
    hannyz08 Posts: 31
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    Well my boyfriend is 6'4, 180 pounds, and in pretty good shape, and can eat whatever he wants. Sometimes when I m around him I feel tempted to eat junk food, because he usually is, but I have that problem when Im around everyone. He does help though sometimes, he knows Im dieting and will ask, "are you sure you want to eat that? are you actually hungry, or are you bored? I mean I dont care if you eat it or not, Im just sayin" and then I go dammit you are right.

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