23 years old and never been in love..
Replies
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Being in love is being with your best friend. All the othe crap from the movies is just infatuation.
Yep... this is true. Love is being with your best friend, whom you'd do anything for (and they'd do anything for you). Once the "flame" (infatuation) burns out, there has to be something there of substance to keep the relationship alive... and it's that strong bond.
You're young, don't fret. It'll happen.0 -
Thank you! I should stay out of the forums cause I am bad with words...but I was focusing on the healthy release of fighting. AND the fact that you know its love when you can fight, get over it, make up and still rather not be anywhere else. I have seen relationships who never fight fail...I have seen myself grow because of it. Its human nature to get angry and I do not believe refraining. I am a VERY loud person as is my partner. It comes naturally to us!
really...wow....yeah, I wouldn't want to be with someone who wouldn't yell. Its proven that if you don't fight its worse than if you do!Hey, no, sorry - my husband and I have never ever yelled or screamed at each other. That's not love, that's disrespect. We have arguments and disagreements, but they're handled calmly and maturely, because there's no way either of us would be with someone who would yell at us.
I didn't say we don't 'fight' -- we have arguments and disagreements. But we don't yell. Yelling at people is rude.
Well, that's grand for the two of you, but please don't go around acting like couples that fight nastily with each other are automatically disrespecting each other. Yelling is a release for anger. No, it's not the best thing to do, but it's sure better than physical violence... I yell when I'm really, really pissed. But if I'm yelling AT someone rather than just in their presence about something unrelated, I always apologize profusely once I've cooled down. My boyfriend has yelled at me, too, but I'm 'mature' enough to recognize that a few things said back and forth in anger don't have to dictate the success, or lack thereof, of our relationship. The key to sticking through the rough patches is realizing that that's all they are-- patches... you lick your wounds, apologize, comfort your partner, and move on. Only when it becomes a daily occurrence or starts over small trivial matters does it become truly destructive.0 -
When you watch romantic comedies you get an idea of what love is like but I'm still amazed.
NO.
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really...wow....yeah, I wouldn't want to be with someone who wouldn't yell. Its proven that if you don't fight its worse than if you do!Hey, no, sorry - my husband and I have never ever yelled or screamed at each other. That's not love, that's disrespect. We have arguments and disagreements, but they're handled calmly and maturely, because there's no way either of us would be with someone who would yell at us.
I didn't say we don't 'fight' -- we have arguments and disagreements. But we don't yell. Yelling at people is rude.
Well, that's grand for the two of you, but please don't go around acting like couples that fight nastily with each other are automatically disrespecting each other. Yelling is a release for anger. No, it's not the best thing to do, but it's sure better than physical violence... I yell when I'm really, really pissed. But if I'm yelling AT someone rather than just in their presence about something unrelated, I always apologize profusely once I've cooled down. My boyfriend has yelled at me, too, but I'm 'mature' enough to recognize that a few things said back and forth in anger don't have to dictate the success, or lack thereof, of our relationship. The key to sticking through the rough patches is realizing that that's all they are-- patches... you lick your wounds, apologize, comfort your partner, and move on. Only when it becomes a daily occurrence or starts over small trivial matters does it become truly destructive.
I'm going to reiterate my point - I find yelling in anger to be disrespectful. It doesn't mean you don't love your partner, by any means. It just means that I find it to be rude and do not consider it a reasonable criteria for determining whether or not you're in love with someone.0 -
PRO TIP: When all we have to go off of is your words, such as in an online forum, it's very important to choose them appropriately to make your point.0
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hmmmm...you didn't say you DID fight.
really...wow....yeah, I wouldn't want to be with someone who wouldn't yell. Its proven that if you don't fight its worse than if you do!Hey, no, sorry - my husband and I have never ever yelled or screamed at each other. That's not love, that's disrespect. We have arguments and disagreements, but they're handled calmly and maturely, because there's no way either of us would be with someone who would yell at us.
I didn't say we don't 'fight' -- we have arguments and disagreements. But we don't yell. Yelling at people is rude.
When I buy the wrong kind of cheese and he is all...blah blah blah, I am not eating that cheese, thats a disagreement not a fight. When we get into heated debates over politics, yes those are arguements, not fights. So clearly, you can see why I assumed you didn't fight, you didn't say you did, nor did you alude to fighting. But as someone who has studied counseling and psychology, not screaming, or letting deep emotions release is quite unhealthy. Screaming and yelling are not disrespectful...its simply a louder volume. I didn't say we name call and put down...I didn't say we insult. I said we scream and yell, and you know what...its our nature and if we denied it, it would be unhealthy. So you can see why I would be offended by you saying my fighting with my partner is not love...kinda rude.
Healthy to yell?
Express anger, yea sure
My aunt and uncle have been married over 30yrs and still crazy about each other.
They don't yell when they have a disagreement....they discuss it rational manner
I do however agree with KortneyI'm going to reiterate my point - I find yelling in anger to be disrespectful. It doesn't mean you don't love your partner, by any means. It just means that I find it to be rude and do not consider it a reasonable criteria for determining whether or not you're in love with someone.
just don't see how it's healthy0 -
Saying you study psychology doesn't make you an expert... and you may very well be in love with your husband, but IN MY OPINION, raising your voice out of anger is not a sign of being in love. Anger is a broad emotion that is typically symptomatic of other feelings, and I don't feel like responding in the heat of the moment out of anger is helpful or beneficial to a relationship.
Oh come on! Shouting in anger is a release and if two people get it out of their system quickly shouting at each other who are you to say it's wrong? Personally I blow up and then 5 minutes later realise how stupid it is and say sorry. Even if I was right. I hate like hell people who hold grudges for days.0 -
Love is NOT a fleeting emotion or something that you "fall" into. That's infatuation.
Love is demonstrated by action over a long period of time.0 -
When you watch romantic comedies you get an idea of what love is like but I'm still amazed.
NO.
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Thats why I didn't say I am an expert. Clearly my words are being taken very out of context and not in the entirety of the entire original post I made so I will just stop. Its been a long day, little sleep, no coffee and if this keeps up I might start yelling! :P
hmmmm...you didn't say you DID fight.
really...wow....yeah, I wouldn't want to be with someone who wouldn't yell. Its proven that if you don't fight its worse than if you do!Hey, no, sorry - my husband and I have never ever yelled or screamed at each other. That's not love, that's disrespect. We have arguments and disagreements, but they're handled calmly and maturely, because there's no way either of us would be with someone who would yell at us.
I didn't say we don't 'fight' -- we have arguments and disagreements. But we don't yell. Yelling at people is rude.
When I buy the wrong kind of cheese and he is all...blah blah blah, I am not eating that cheese, thats a disagreement not a fight. When we get into heated debates over politics, yes those are arguements, not fights. So clearly, you can see why I assumed you didn't fight, you didn't say you did, nor did you alude to fighting. But as someone who has studied counseling and psychology, not screaming, or letting deep emotions release is quite unhealthy. Screaming and yelling are not disrespectful...its simply a louder volume. I didn't say we name call and put down...I didn't say we insult. I said we scream and yell, and you know what...its our nature and if we denied it, it would be unhealthy. So you can see why I would be offended by you saying my fighting with my partner is not love...kinda rude.
Saying you study psychology doesn't make you an expert... and you may very well be in love with your husband, but IN MY OPINION, raising your voice out of anger is not a sign of being in love. Anger is a broad emotion that is typically symptomatic of other feelings, and I don't feel like responding in the heat of the moment out of anger is helpful or beneficial to a relationship.0 -
movies are the best example ever for what love isnt like. if you can except how that person is at their worst and still want to be for them, have similar life goals, GET ALONG ( probably the most important) and you cant picture yourself with another person ever, that's love. crap happens and things will never be perfect but you will for the most part be very happy.0
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When you watch romantic comedies you get an idea of what love is like but I'm still amazed.
:noway: :noway: :noway:0 -
I have been with my husband for 11 years. I always knew he loved me, but I didn't realize how much he loved me until I was in the hospital after having a c-section with our first daughter. I couldn't move, I was in so much pain. He took me to the restroom, cleaned me, gave me a bath (and if you have ever had a baby, you know why this isn't fun!) dressed me and was so patient and loving with me. He stayed up all night with me.
^ this is love.
I will wake up in the morning (very early) to go to work knowing that when I got home the day before I was out of gas DREADING filling up gas in the cold *kitten* weather. I will step into my car and notice that he filled it up for me in the middle of the night so I wouldn't have to fill gas in the cold *kitten* weather.
^ this is love.
He told me I was the most beautiful woman when I was at my highest weight, even though he met me at my lowest weight.
^ this is love.
We fight (lord do we fight) but we always end up okay because we know there is no other choice.
^ this is love.
He cooks for me. I cook for him. Even if we think the food needs more salt, we still eat it.
^ this is love.
I scratch his back at night before we both fall asleep because he loves it. Even if i'm tired as hell. And I will tell him i'm tired as hell, but I still do it.
^ this is love.
If there is only one french fry left. He will give it to me.
^ this is love.
Watching him love our kids.
^ this is love.
He loves my family like they are his own.
^ this is love.
I love his family like they are my own.
^ this is love.
I really cannot imagine my life without him even though i want to kill him sometimes.
^ this is love.
I can go on and on...
Love is more than a feeling. It is actions. It takes a lot of experience with someone to really know what love is. It can be the biggest pain in the *kitten* sometimes, but it really is the most wonderful thing.
QFT.0 -
Love means never having to say your're sorry........for pushing a hot fart under the covers
Yes lol This is my relationship 0 -
i used to think i was in love alot but i came to the conculsion that its was me that was in love with that person they didn't love me0
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When I say love I mean that I've never been infatuated or had a crush on anybody! I had a crush once when I was like 7 years old...
So maybe I'm immune or not capable? :-) I used to think I can't love.. That's what my exes told me.. I have a heart of stone bla bla.
But I'm not searching and I don't worry anymore. I'm used to being alone and I like it. If my "destiny" is to live alone then okay. At least I have my family and they're everything to me.0 -
When you watch romantic comedies you get an idea of what love is like but I'm still amazed.
NO.
THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FOR ME.
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I have never been in real love before. My relations were just like strong attraction from my side but i was being loyal and commitment to the person.
I hope i can find love one day or let it find me!
So we're in the same boat 7abiby. :-)
A MFP Khutba :laugh: :laugh:0 -
I think this post goes to show that love is there if you can find it and that is great
But there will always be people on internet forums that do not share the love :devil:0 -
When you watch romantic comedies you get an idea of what love is like but I'm still amazed.
NO.
That'd get my panties off.....
wait....
that's not love either is it?0 -
Being in love is being with your best friend. All the othe crap from the movies is just infatuation.
yupp..0 -
I'm deeply in love with my wife of 7 years. I met her and knew after month I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Romantic comedies and the love they portray are not real. You know you love the person your with when they do something that upsets you and instead of walking away or getting mad you just want to fix it. Love is wanting to spend time with that person because they are your best friend, because they validate you, and make you want to be a better person. Falling in love is easy, hell you probably were in love with you last two boyfriends, but you weren't in a loving relationship, there is a difference. Next to the birth of my children, the day my wife agreed to marry me is the happiest day of my life.
Now if I can only convince her to start watching football with me.0 -
That's nothing! Didn't you see "never been kissed" that lady was 26 and had never even been kissed.
(I joke)0 -
I am 36 and never felt love from another woman. I've had lots of stalkers, though.0
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I'm deeply in love with my wife of 7 years. I met her and knew after month I want to spend the rest of my life with her. Romantic comedies and the love they portray are not real. You know you love the person your with when they do something that upsets you and instead of walking away or getting mad you just want to fix it. Love is wanting to spend time with that person because they are your best friend, because they validate you, and make you want to be a better person. Falling in love is easy, hell you probably were in love with you last two boyfriends, but you weren't in a loving relationship, there is a difference. Next to the birth of my children, the day my wife agreed to marry me is the happiest day of my life.
Now if I can only convince her to start watching football with me.
I think falling in love is easy for some people. Like you, and my mom.. Not for me and nope I did definitely not fall in love with my exes.. But that's a long and sad story.0 -
what is this "love" of which you speak?
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fell in love first time at 25, 6 months later, heart broken, still in love
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It's overrated0
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I have been with my husband for 11 years. I always knew he loved me, but I didn't realize how much he loved me until I was in the hospital after having a c-section with our first daughter. I couldn't move, I was in so much pain. He took me to the restroom, cleaned me, gave me a bath (and if you have ever had a baby, you know why this isn't fun!) dressed me and was so patient and loving with me. He stayed up all night with me.
^ this is love.
I will wake up in the morning (very early) to go to work knowing that when I got home the day before I was out of gas DREADING filling up gas in the cold *kitten* weather. I will step into my car and notice that he filled it up for me in the middle of the night so I wouldn't have to fill gas in the cold *kitten* weather.
^ this is love.
He told me I was the most beautiful woman when I was at my highest weight, even though he met me at my lowest weight.
^ this is love.
We fight (lord do we fight) but we always end up okay because we know there is no other choice.
^ this is love.
He cooks for me. I cook for him. Even if we think the food needs more salt, we still eat it.
^ this is love.
I scratch his back at night before we both fall asleep because he loves it. Even if i'm tired as hell. And I will tell him i'm tired as hell, but I still do it.
^ this is love.
If there is only one french fry left. He will give it to me.
^ this is love.
Watching him love our kids.
^ this is love.
He loves my family like they are his own.
^ this is love.
I love his family like they are my own.
^ this is love.
I really cannot imagine my life without him even though i want to kill him sometimes.
^ this is love.
I can go on and on...
Love is more than a feeling. It is actions. It takes a lot of experience with someone to really know what love is. It can be the biggest pain in the *kitten* sometimes, but it really is the most wonderful thing.0 -
^ I am obsessed with thise and it made me CRY that is EXACTLY my experience with my husband. Amazing true unconditional love. We are lucky ladies It just happens!! Its worth waiting for 0
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