MFP not helping or showing support, just being rude!

EmmaReed84

I think what has got my back up more is the fact that (from my own personal point of view) all this TDEE stuff is the ONLY single way to do it.

I have nicknamed it My Fitness Preachers LOL.

Every 'body' is different therefore weightloss is going to be different. I think a more friendly approach to the eat more would be "Have you tried this, maybe give it a go and see if it works for you" instead "EAT MORE EAT MORE EAT MORE!!!!!!"

Laura_Ivy

I have the perfect solution! Stay away from the boards. :flowerforyou: Add your friends that you feel you can connect to and leave it at that.

UsedToBeHusky

You know, when I first started posting in the forums, I got called out on more than one occasion for posting incorrect and inaccurate information. It's just part of the nature of the beast. Because the content here is user-generated, many people post their opinions as if they are facts, and those are usually the people that get railed on. Just like anywhere else in the world, MFP has its controversial topics. If you can't accept an opposing view, then you shouldn't be using the internet.

xXxHBICxXx

The *kitten* are out and free there is no shutting them up or making them see that they are in fact *kitten*. Ignore them, newbies should all visit http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/912920-in-place-of-a-road-map-3-2013?hl=road+map, will help I promise (sorry to all of you who hate when ppl post this) Dan knows his **** and the road map is helpful!

KenosFeoh

When I start recognizing a screen name as being a rude responder, I put them on ignore. It's easy; just click the drop-down arrow beside the screen name, then click on ignore user. My forum life is becoming much more peaceful.

The nicest place is on my home page with my friends.

Acg67

agree. some people need to learn forum etiquette. just because we are onilne and not face to face gives you the right to treat other people with direspect. You should treat others the way you would like to be treated in person or in the forums.

Are you referring to the common etiquette on all forums to first search for your question to see if it's been answered before or something else?

_crafty_

Do you have an example of someone being called stupid (or any other name)?

I'd like to see that link.


I think what happens more frequently is this:

There are a lot of successful people here who have done the research and achieved great results themsevles. Someone else will ask a question about cleanses, shakes, pills, etc, and a successful person will bluntly tell them why it's bad. The problem is that people don't like to hear that they are wrong. So, they get upset about it and think they are being bullied.

That said, if someone is actually calling names or being ridiculously mean to someone else, that behavior should be reported. I'd like to see an example of that though. I'm on the forums quite a bit and I have only seen it a few times - and the mods have always dealt with it right away.

::applause::

/end thread

Wowat50

There is no reason for anyone to be rude and result to name calling. I don't think there are any stupid questions. Everyone here is here because we are seeking to be the best we can be. I am anyway.
If you are tired of seeing a question repeated, then just ignore it and move on. Only answer if you can help the person asking the question. Don't try to make them feel stupid for asking.
A little kindness goes a long way.

EmmaReed84

I have the perfect solution! Stay away from the boards. :flowerforyou: Add your friends that you feel you can connect to and leave it at that.

But why should someone stay away from the boards just because of a few people who can come across rather bullish in their approach to weightloss? What if the person has a question, should they think, I had better not ask in case someone is rude to me. Surely the point of the forum is for support

stratcat45

Unfortunately when it comes to public boards (all of them, not just here) you have to deal with the people who get enjoyment out of putting others down. They can't help it - it is so easy to hide in cyber-space.

If someone has a process that works for them - they refuse to believe that any other process works despite that fact that we are all different and not one thing will work for everyone.

Some questions get asked over and over....I feel that if you're sick of seeing a repeated question, stay off the thread then...but like I said, some can not help themselves.

skinnyinnotime

Well in my experience there are SOME rude people however, most 'rude' people are simply giving advice that the op doesn't want to hear or doesn't agree with and magically those people then become 'rude'.

quirkytizzy

I have the perfect solution! Stay away from the boards. :flowerforyou: Add your friends that you feel you can connect to and leave it at that.

But why should someone stay away from the boards just because of a few people who can come across rather bullish in their approach to weightloss? What if the person has a question, should they think, I had better not ask in case someone is rude to me. Surely the point of the forum is for support

People get "support" confused with "please validate my dangerous and/or ineffective diet approach."

To which I will not do.

winterswish

When I start recognizing a screen name as being a rude responder, I put them on ignore. It's easy; just click the drop-down arrow beside the screen name, then click on ignore user. My forum life is becoming much more peaceful.

The nicest place is on my home page with my friends.

^^^ I was just about to post about the 'ignore' option. But, to be fair, as so many others have said-- this is the internet and there will always be someone ready to show their bravado. Take it in stride, take what works for you and just shake your head at the trolls.

And definitely load your friends list with supportive folks who can maybe answer your questions before hitting the forums. Makes MFP life so much more pleasant!

i_am_losing_it

I agree with you about people being rude. I have found joining a group that most of the groups have supportive and helpful people. And if you join a group where the same stuff is going on just quit that one and join one that fits you better.

Cr01502

If you're this upset already, I'd advise you to stay out of the forums. I'm not being rude - I'm just saying they're not going to change. You either have to learn to love them, learn to ignore what you don't like or ignore the forums altogether. Or keep at them and keep writing "Mean people are mean" threads. Really, it doesn't matter.

Agreed. Stick to your friends list if you can't stomach these sort of things.

People's definition of "mean" and "support" vary.

I would consider telling someone who's starving themselves at 600 calories a day "Great job hun. Now just try and a teeny weeny bit more OK?" being "mean" and "unsupportive" as I think he/she needs a reality check and needs to eat cheeseburger pronto.

IronPlayground

People on MFP really are supportive. The conflict comes in when someone, who is new, asks a question, but only wants a particular answer. Too many times people don't want the truth, they want to be validated.

Keep an open mind and understand that there are many ways to go about weight loss. What is important is that whatever way you choose be healthy and something you can see yourself doing long term. And, it needs to be something you enjoy.

Faye_Anderson

And on the flip side , there are a load of stickied threads above for Newbies to read, so that they understand how MFP is designed to work.

And a search function.

I would recommend any new people to take the time to read those stickies, and also try searching first before asking a question, as many of the rude answers are because old timers are fed up of seeing the same questions repeated time and time again.

So if people do a bit of research, they can find their answer without getting a "WTF not this question again!!", which could put them off asking next time they have a question.

^^This

UsedToBeHusky

I have the perfect solution! Stay away from the boards. :flowerforyou: Add your friends that you feel you can connect to and leave it at that.

But why should someone stay away from the boards just because of a few people who can come across rather bullish in their approach to weightloss? What if the person has a question, should they think, I had better not ask in case someone is rude to me. Surely the point of the forum is for support

Likewise, people may not feel that their approach is "bullish". What exactly do you propose? The website has features to handle abusive posters, but for the most part, if you don't like what you are reading, then perhaps you could just ignore it and move on.

SusieDerkinsRocks

Do you have an example of someone being called stupid (or any other name)?

I'd like to see that link.

I think what happens more frequently is this:

There are a lot of successful people here who have done the research and achieved great results themsevles. Someone else will ask a question about cleanses, shakes, pills, etc, and a successful person will bluntly tell them why it's bad. The problem is that people don't like to hear that they are wrong. So, they get upset about it and think they are being bullied.

That said, if someone is actually calling names or being ridiculously mean to someone else, that behavior should be reported. I'd like to see an example of that though. I'm on the forums quite a bit and I have only seen it a few times - and the mods have always dealt with it right away.

^^^^^ this ^^^^^^^

Sweet_Gurl_Next_Door

try to post any questions I have to my friends on my status. that is what many of the others do.