How young is too young?
Replies
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there are alot of morally corrupt people in this country yes, i have no problem admitting that, it's what annoys me about my own country it's why there are bankers with million £ bonuses while children and familes in poverty
Cool, then I can agree that the Indian subcontinent also has its issues with the rights of women and children.
I don't think we can categorise the UK or India as "bad" countries as a result though - merely that they have issues that they are taking steps to address.
Most of us are good, no matter where we are from
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You are quiet mistaken kind sir; I don't fancy arguing with you, I only wanted to understand where India came from. After your clarification that you stereotyped him as an Indian due to his looks and your vast knowledge of Indians because there are a lot of them where you live. I know understand why you casted him as Indian and preceded to link him to India and rape to crush his credibility.
sex with a child is rape imho
Now you are taking your argument to a whole new field.
We can all agree on sex with a child being rape, that is why we have laws in each of our countries that clear state that and define a child.
I personally think child labour is like rape for what it's taking away from the children. But that doesn't give me the right to say everyone using an IPhone helped rape those poor kids in China.
That would be taking my argument to a whole new field.
no i'm not taking it to another field the guy's credibility was removed when he said if a girl bleeds she can breed, at a very common age being around 13 (sometimes as early as 11 for a girl at my school) that is basicly condoning rape as an entire "culture"
and to add i dont give a rats *kitten* what country he's from what he said was wrong regardless of being culture or not
So what is the magic number that you think they are not a child and more, cause you don't seem to like the evolution/natural age they get.
I like 30
just because you gain the ability to do something doesn't mean you do it, sexual maturity is not when a girl first get's her period, infact girls carry on growing up till about 18 iirc
i believe mid 20's personally0 -
Her body seem to clearly disagree with your assessment.
So what exactly?
Simply because you are physically able to do something does not mean you are emotionally or intellectually able to do so.
It's about ensure that children are given sufficient protection not to have an adult exploit what is essentially a position of power (age / experience) to their detriment.
Simply because something is natural does not mean it is automatically right or beneficial.
So when is the magical number? I think 16 and 18 are kids too why not bump it up to 30?0 -
People at 17 I had my own house worked full time an paid my bills! everyone is assuming this gir is immature when she might not be at all, like I said I was in a relationship with a older man and he was the immature one
In the uk you can join the army at 17 I went out partying at this age
This has no bearing on anyone else. At 18 I moved out, payed my own bills, etc. Was I as 'grown up' and mature as I am now....no. I feel like even though at the time I felt an adult, there was actually a LOT to learn about life. 17 IS young. Going out partying is no indication of maturity.
I never said it was a sign of maturity so sorry if you thought I meant that!
I was trying to say you can join the army/navy/air force at 17 be sent to war an that's ok but you can't date a 29yo man/woman
If anything I'm more immature now than before its all about the individual0 -
You are quiet mistaken kind sir; I don't fancy arguing with you, I only wanted to understand where India came from. After your clarification that you stereotyped him as an Indian due to his looks and your vast knowledge of Indians because there are a lot of them where you live. I know understand why you casted him as Indian and preceded to link him to India and rape to crush his credibility.
sex with a child is rape imho
Now you are taking your argument to a whole new field.
We can all agree on sex with a child being rape, that is why we have laws in each of our countries that clear state that and define a child.
I personally think child labour is like rape for what it's taking away from the children. But that doesn't give me the right to say everyone using an IPhone helped rape those poor kids in China.
That would be taking my argument to a whole new field.
no i'm not taking it to another field the guy's credibility was removed when he said if a girl bleeds she can breed, at a very common age being around 13 (sometimes as early as 11 for a girl at my school) that is basicly condoning rape as an entire "culture"
and to add i dont give a rats *kitten* what country he's from what he said was wrong regardless of being culture or not
So what is the magic number that you think they are not a child and more, cause you don't seem to like the evolution/natural age they get.
I like 30
just because you gain the ability to do something doesn't mean you do it, sexual maturity is not when a girl first get's her period, infact girls carry on growing up till about 18 iirc
i believe mid 20's personally
see now we getting some where. So by this you would not have sexual contact with people under their mid twenties (24-26?) cause under that they are technically kids.0 -
So when is the magical number? I think 16 and 18 are kids too why not bump it up to 30?
I think the age of consent at 16 for a robust democracy is reasonable if there is a reasonable level of rights / protection.
The point is you must set the line [/i]somewhere[/i] and then use the Judiciary to interpret the law given the individual facts.0 -
You are quiet mistaken kind sir; I don't fancy arguing with you, I only wanted to understand where India came from. After your clarification that you stereotyped him as an Indian due to his looks and your vast knowledge of Indians because there are a lot of them where you live. I know understand why you casted him as Indian and preceded to link him to India and rape to crush his credibility.
sex with a child is rape imho
Now you are taking your argument to a whole new field.
We can all agree on sex with a child being rape, that is why we have laws in each of our countries that clear state that and define a child.
I personally think child labour is like rape for what it's taking away from the children. But that doesn't give me the right to say everyone using an IPhone helped rape those poor kids in China.
That would be taking my argument to a whole new field.
no i'm not taking it to another field the guy's credibility was removed when he said if a girl bleeds she can breed, at a very common age being around 13 (sometimes as early as 11 for a girl at my school) that is basicly condoning rape as an entire "culture"
and to add i dont give a rats *kitten* what country he's from what he said was wrong regardless of being culture or not
So what is the magic number that you think they are not a child and more, cause you don't seem to like the evolution/natural age they get.
I like 30
just because you gain the ability to do something doesn't mean you do it, sexual maturity is not when a girl first get's her period, infact girls carry on growing up till about 18 iirc
i believe mid 20's personally
see now we getting some where. So by this you would not have sexual contact with people under their mid twenties (24-26?) cause under that they are technically kids.
no i wouldn't procreate with someone under mid 20's, sex on the other hand at 24 i'd probably stretch to 18/19 but generally i go for older women anyway0 -
Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?0
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You are quiet mistaken kind sir; I don't fancy arguing with you, I only wanted to understand where India came from. After your clarification that you stereotyped him as an Indian due to his looks and your vast knowledge of Indians because there are a lot of them where you live. I know understand why you casted him as Indian and preceded to link him to India and rape to crush his credibility.
sex with a child is rape imho
Now you are taking your argument to a whole new field.
We can all agree on sex with a child being rape, that is why we have laws in each of our countries that clear state that and define a child.
I personally think child labour is like rape for what it's taking away from the children. But that doesn't give me the right to say everyone using an IPhone helped rape those poor kids in China.
That would be taking my argument to a whole new field.
no i'm not taking it to another field the guy's credibility was removed when he said if a girl bleeds she can breed, at a very common age being around 13 (sometimes as early as 11 for a girl at my school) that is basicly condoning rape as an entire "culture"
and to add i dont give a rats *kitten* what country he's from what he said was wrong regardless of being culture or not
So what is the magic number that you think they are not a child and more, cause you don't seem to like the evolution/natural age they get.
I like 30
just because you gain the ability to do something doesn't mean you do it, sexual maturity is not when a girl first get's her period, infact girls carry on growing up till about 18 iirc
i believe mid 20's personally
see now we getting some where. So by this you would not have sexual contact with people under their mid twenties (24-26?) cause under that they are technically kids.
no i wouldn't procreate with someone under mid 20's, sex on the other hand at 24 i'd probably stretch to 18/19 but generally i go for older women anyway
I think the OP should go for someone younger, if he can pull a 17 year old hes probably not bad looking?0 -
i hope you mean younger than himself and not younger than 17 lol0
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I think the most important thing to know is whether or not you can comfortably support a 17 year old with personal problems (worst case scenario). At 17 you're either looking for a guy your own age or aiming for someone much older because you have daddy issues and/or want to buy stuff you can't afford.
If your bank account and mental health are good to go, then enjoy.
My ex is a fair bit older than I am. He's a genius, is ridiculously successful (and was when I was 17), has great taste in music and shares some fairly niche hobbies with me. I still wouldn't have dated him when I was in my late teens, and he wouldn't have dated me. He had no problem attracting trophy girlfriends either, if that's her appeal. Most successful, well adjusted men in their late 20s and early 30s easily find themselves younger, attractive partners. Even at 22 when I first started dating my ex we had trouble finding common ground in areas outside of our hobbies and taste in music/film/etc. It worked for a number of years until circumstances drove us apart. He decided that he wanted to work overseas again and while I was really excited at the thought of having a live in maid rather than just a twice a week cleaner, I wasn't ready to move my life overseas. Had I been a decade older things might have been different. Damn, I really want a live in maid.0 -
Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?
that was common at a time when the young girl in question had little choice, no rights & no access to money of her own. Thankfully this is no longer the case so that is why you fnid that most children aren't forced to make these kinds of choices anymore & why most women are thankful for it.0 -
wow0
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Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?
that was common at a time when the young girl in question had little choice, no rights & no access to money of her own. Thankfully this is no longer the case so that is why you fnid that most children aren't forced to make these kinds of choices anymore & why most women are thankful for it.
The thought of a young girl marrying an older "gentleman" in an arranged marriage is just depressing. Why anyone would romanticise that era is beyond me.0 -
Yes, any form of bondage, even that with a vestige of respectabilty about it, is still bondage.0
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Yes, any form of bondage, even that with a vestige of respectabilty about it, is still bondage.
Yes. Yes it is.0 -
You are quiet mistaken kind sir; I don't fancy arguing with you, I only wanted to understand where India came from. After your clarification that you stereotyped him as an Indian due to his looks and your vast knowledge of Indians because there are a lot of them where you live. I know understand why you casted him as Indian and preceded to link him to India and rape to crush his credibility.
sex with a child is rape imho
Now you are taking your argument to a whole new field.
We can all agree on sex with a child being rape, that is why we have laws in each of our countries that clear state that and define a child.
I personally think child labour is like rape for what it's taking away from the children. But that doesn't give me the right to say everyone using an IPhone helped rape those poor kids in China.
That would be taking my argument to a whole new field.
no i'm not taking it to another field the guy's credibility was removed when he said if a girl bleeds she can breed, at a very common age being around 13 (sometimes as early as 11 for a girl at my school) that is basicly condoning rape as an entire "culture"
and to add i dont give a rats *kitten* what country he's from what he said was wrong regardless of being culture or not
So what is the magic number that you think they are not a child and more, cause you don't seem to like the evolution/natural age they get.
I like 30
just because you gain the ability to do something doesn't mean you do it, sexual maturity is not when a girl first get's her period, infact girls carry on growing up till about 18 iirc
i believe mid 20's personally
see now we getting some where. So by this you would not have sexual contact with people under their mid twenties (24-26?) cause under that they are technically kids.
no i wouldn't procreate with someone under mid 20's, sex on the other hand at 24 i'd probably stretch to 18/19 but generally i go for older women anyway
I thought we established mid 24 as the new 18, so stretching down from 24 to 18 is like going from 18 to 12. So based on that sex with a child is okay as long as you don't procreate? That seems pretty twisted logic.0 -
Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?
that was common at a time when the young girl in question had little choice, no rights & no access to money of her own. Thankfully this is no longer the case so that is why you fnid that most children aren't forced to make these kinds of choices anymore & why most women are thankful for it.
The thought of a young girl marrying an older "gentleman" in an arranged marriage is just depressing. Why anyone would romanticise that era is beyond me.
Thankyou - and I agree with both of you. but that's not the point. The point being that older men have become villified if they seek younger women. That all they want is sex and have nothing else to offer. On the other hand older women seeking younger men seems ok. A double standard ?0 -
Re: the setting the age of consent. I think we need to put ourselves in the place of lawmakers and understand what they are trying to achieve by setting it at a certain age.
Let's say I was considering raising the age of consent to 18. However, living in the real world I understand that many 17 year olds probably want to have sex or are having sex. Is it a desirable outcome to have a law which criminalise two 17 year old who give in to certain biological urges?
At the same time, I understand that in relative terms, a 17 year old is more vulnerable and have less power than say, a 29 year old. I want to ensure that the 17 year old isn't exploited due to that position but at the same time if they have sufficient maturity not to pose an impediment to their sexual relationships which they freely enter into.
That is why a free and full functioning Judiciary is vitally important for a democracy. To interpret law and put it into a real world context to secure good outcomes.0 -
This is BORING...I came all this way for nothing..0
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Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?
that was common at a time when the young girl in question had little choice, no rights & no access to money of her own. Thankfully this is no longer the case so that is why you fnid that most children aren't forced to make these kinds of choices anymore & why most women are thankful for it.
The thought of a young girl marrying an older "gentleman" in an arranged marriage is just depressing. Why anyone would romanticise that era is beyond me.
Thankyou - and I agree with both of you. but that's not the point. The point being that older men have become villified if they seek younger women. That all they want is sex and have nothing else to offer. On the other hand older women seeking younger men seems ok. A double standard ?
It's not the same at all, the new thing of older women/younger men is NOT the way it used to be for older men/MUCH younger GIRLS.0 -
Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?
that was common at a time when the young girl in question had little choice, no rights & no access to money of her own. Thankfully this is no longer the case so that is why you fnid that most children aren't forced to make these kinds of choices anymore & why most women are thankful for it.
The thought of a young girl marrying an older "gentleman" in an arranged marriage is just depressing. Why anyone would romanticise that era is beyond me.
Thankyou - and I agree with both of you. but that's not the point. The point being that older men have become villified if they seek younger women. That all they want is sex and have nothing else to offer. On the other hand older women seeking younger men seems ok. A double standard ?
It's not the same at all, the new thing of older women/younger men is NOT the way it used to be for older men/MUCH younger GIRLS.
Yes I agree it isn't the same - point being men have become villified as wanting nothing but sex from younger women- anyways thanks OP for the chance to provide comments to this interesting topic - Take care everyone !!!0 -
Wow still alive ? I thought historically is was not uncommon for and older gentleman to marry a much younger "girl", and marriages were arranged. The notion being the older man was established and could provide for the younger wife. At some point this notion seems to have morphed and villified older men. The villification being that all a guy can see in a younger women is sex. Seems to me a realtionship is more than sex so why do folks here reduce these things to the evil creepy guy to the innocent immature gal. Certainly there is need for caution but why do we always seem to see the dark side all the time ?
that was common at a time when the young girl in question had little choice, no rights & no access to money of her own. Thankfully this is no longer the case so that is why you fnid that most children aren't forced to make these kinds of choices anymore & why most women are thankful for it.
The thought of a young girl marrying an older "gentleman" in an arranged marriage is just depressing. Why anyone would romanticise that era is beyond me.
Thankyou - and I agree with both of you. but that's not the point. The point being that older men have become villified if they seek younger women. That all they want is sex and have nothing else to offer. On the other hand older women seeking younger men seems ok. A double standard ?
Older women seeking out younger men are treated as sex crazed objects of derision. That's on a good day. As it is, it's perfectly acceptable for men to seek out younger women, just not young girls who should be focused on school, uni, fighting with their parents and tweeting their undying love to Justin Bieber. No one batted an eyelid at the huge power imbalance between my ex and I. If the situation were reversed and I had had the high paying job, the success, and an eye for young men still in uni people would have talked. No, mostly they'd have laughed.
To be perfectly honest, had I been the weight I am now and not in posession of the features that god (and my surgeon) gave me, my ex wouldn't have been so interested. Was he just in it for sex? No, but he liked the attention that came from dating a younger, attractive woman. I don't think that what he did was in any way wrong, but neither of us would for a second have pretended he was with me solely because of my winning personality.0 -
The idea, in the past, and still valid today in developing countries (such as China and India) is that an older man equates to stability. They are established in their careers, usually have some money, are more devoted to family (past the wilder stages) etc. etc. This is still a cultural meme today in many countries. The idea of marrying for love is considered a quaint story/fairy tale dream or only for those privileged few. It seems obvious to me that "old enough to bleed, old enough to breed" was said merely to stoke some fires, kind of like "if there's grass on the field, go ahead and play ball" or "8-80, crippled, blind or crazy..." lots of those expressions out there.
I don't know about the rest of you but I was sexually active in high school, not proud of it and not ashamed of it... just the way it was in the 1980's. Condemning sex at those ages is about the same as commanding the tides not to rise or fall. Getting your panties in a wad because other cultures don't behave the way you think they should is pretty darned arrogant. But the most ironic thing about it is... they don't give a rat's @$$ what people from other cultures think.0 -
The only questions:
1. Is it ever possible--regardless of age--to give consent if the power dynamic is skewed drastically against you;
2. Is there a moral responsibility to protect someone against whom the power dynamic is drastically skewed; and
3. Does allowing drastically skewed power dynamics to persist hurt society?0 -
17 is a child. I'd suggest waiting until she's no longer a teenager.
I'm not against age gaps...there's 10 years between my husband and I but we're adults when we met.0 -
If it feels right, do it!
I am kinda seeing this younger guy.... He's 17 and lives across the street from me.
Binoculars were kinda expensive, but anything for love, right?0 -
17 year old?If it feels right, do it!
I am kinda seeing this younger guy.... He's 17 and lives across the street from me.
Binoculars were kinda expensive, but anything for love, right?
You're doing it wrong. Walk around the house in underwear and leave the blinds open. Attracts 17 year olds like a magnet.
If that doesn't work: make a milkshake.0 -
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17 year old?If it feels right, do it!
I am kinda seeing this younger guy.... He's 17 and lives across the street from me.
Binoculars were kinda expensive, but anything for love, right?
You're doing it wrong. Walk around the house in underwear and leave the blinds open. Attracts 17 year olds like a magnet.
If that doesn't work: make a milkshake.
go out and wash your car in daisy dukes and tied up t-shirt. You could have saved a lot of money on those binoculars :laugh:0
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