support for Binge Eating Disorder
Replies
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Hey!
Glad to hear for everyone we are all getting there. I have one or two good days then one bad dat. But I'm getting there trying to stay postive and trying new ideas on how to stop I'm just going to keep going it takes time to stop a bad habit. So no point beating myself because of it. I'll get there one day at a time.
Good luck to all this weekend
Melissa0 -
Hey!
So a bad day today, I logged in my food to see how bad it was like 6000 cals wow. I hopping that this will be a kick start me into eating better. I never log it in because it makes me feel worse but I feel it was time to really deal with it instead of hiding from it. wow what a wake up call. It feels good to be honest with myself though. Time to start up new again.
Here we go!
Melissa0 -
Another step in the right direction Mel---you're learning too, every day. That's all we can do, keep learning. Learn from our mistakes, learn from our patterns, and figure this stuff out and just think of the day way back when you wouldn't have even given it another thought. But no more, now we are bettering ourselves. You and I both girlie! I'm still doing fine today but you know me, night is my downfall. Today has been a good day though. I had a revelation that I am no longer the fattest person in the room. You can check out my success story I wrote if you'd like.
What time zone are you on Melissa?0 -
Hey!
Tks I'm MST time. My bad time is in the early morning and during the day when kids are at school. It is 6:17p.m. right now. Stress is my down fall something gets to me and I eat.
I do early morning papers I'm up at 2a.m. to go to work then home at 6:00a.m. So I really having a hard time if I should eat before work then after again.
Good news is I'm starting a new program to help better educate myself and fight binging. It starts tomorrow. It teachs on how to eat tracking Cals and and excerise controling craving and dealing with stress so hopeful it will help.
I really need help to learn how to eat right again. The bad thing is I can not remeber how I ate before I started doing papers that is sad.
I'm also really tired during the day so that doesn't help as well.
Any ideas would be helpful on how I can get back on track.
Tks
Mel0 -
Wow, that's a crazy schedule. :noway:0
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Hey!
Tks I'm MST time. My bad time is in the early morning and during the day when kids are at school. It is 6:17p.m. right now. Stress is my down fall something gets to me and I eat.
I do early morning papers I'm up at 2a.m. to go to work then home at 6:00a.m. So I really having a hard time if I should eat before work then after again.
Good news is I'm starting a new program to help better educate myself and fight binging. It starts tomorrow. It teachs on how to eat tracking Cals and and excerise controling craving and dealing with stress so hopeful it will help.
I really need help to learn how to eat right again. The bad thing is I can not remeber how I ate before I started doing papers that is sad.
I'm also really tired during the day so that doesn't help as well.
Any ideas would be helpful on how I can get back on track.
Tks
Mel
Keep us posted on the class. It will help. Just keep posting and searching and reading. The true key to success is not giving up and getting rid of that all or nothing, stinking thinking. Learning we are not perfect. Even though we are all having ups and downs we are making progress daily. Just by logging 6000 calories is good also. Before you may have been in denial but by logging it you are facing it and the next time it may be 5000 calories with 2 to 3 good days in between. Have a great day tomorrow and share some of the tips you take away. I look forward to hearing from you!!0 -
this is me in a nutshell.. i eat so much some days that I swear I can't bend over..
worst day ever way the day my ex and i broke up... and then my friend passed away 2 days later...
I went to A&W - 2 teen burgers, large fries, onion rings and a large rootbeer milkshake
McDonalds - bigmac, chicken nuggets, fries, 2 apple pies and 2 mcflurrys,
Krispy Kreme - 24 original donoughts
Tim Hortons - 12 cookies, and 6 honey crullers
Home - and downed an entire carton of juice, w/e was left in the pb jar and candy.
gotta figure it out.. today was much better... i went to extreme pita for dinner had a small pita, had a small booster juice, and 2 starbucks cookies.. (could have done without the cookies) but i haven't gone towards any more food.. thank god..0 -
:flowerforyou: Hi you guys,
I used to be an emotional eater and kind of bingy, but I would not say I fell into this category. I did read a helpful book last summer, "Women, Food and God," by Geneen Roth (I think I have the name of the book right...) that I highly recommend for this group. It really helped me understand why I was eating when I was not really hungry for food...sometimes you are hungry for something else in your life....sometimes you have to dig to get to the heart of it....sometimes this habit started in childhood....sometimes.....
This book might help you to dig deep and do some soul searching to find out what you are really hungry for. One forewarning...G. Roth's God is not my God....this is not really a book promoting Christian values.....I am a Christian and thought that I was buying a faith-based book. It is not that at all. However, she is respectful of all faiths and has some great things to say. She is also an author of other books that help those with eating disorders. Check out all of her books at your local bookstore.
You can also find her interviews on Oprah's website. She was featured a few times last summer. Hey, I admire your honesty. That is the first step in your climb over this mountain. My emotional eating is now just a hill....the mountain got smaller after reading this book and spending some time in real reflection. Dig deep and find yourself. You soooooooooooo deserve a life free from these demons.:flowerforyou:
Blessings,
Fab
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I have found it so helpful that my immediate friends and family know exactly what is going on with me and why I'm doing what I'm doing. I agree that the general population doesn't not understand binge eating the way we need them to. This does indeed make it very difficult to talk about it. I do not discuss my "condition" with just anyone but those who I am closest to have to know. If they don't know then it would be a constant struggle every time an indulgence situation arose. It was very weird in the beginning when I first started telling people and trying to explain it but now that it is my ongoing lifestyle, they respect my decisions and are very understanding. They no longer question why I turn things down, they no longer are offended when I don't eat what they eat, holidays are easier, parties are easier. It is an addiction and we need to take the necessary precautions to keep it in check. I encourage us all to talk to our family & friends and let them know what is going on with us. It will help.
Very true words of wisdom. It is less stressful and people understand you more and are very supportive when you explain it.
Some do not understand, and I had a few friends who would not cooperate and I had to limit my association with them. They either kept pushing me to eat more or a few of them would not respect my wishes not to do smorgoboards, buffets, and all the all-you-can eat places. All you can eat places do not help me at all and I stay away from them all like a plague is in the food.......:-) More fat food because I will eat like a pig!!
I will pay more to stay out of these food traps. I can't do them and have not did them for over 10 years now. A few of my friends could not respect that so I respect them also and do not go out to eat with them. And after analyzing the relationships I realize this is what we had in common and not much else. They allowed me to be comfortable overeating when my true friends would check me gently if they saw me going over board. But as you all know most binge eating is done in secret.
My Mother, 1 good friend and friends in support groups are the only ones who know I go to OA meetings. Ok I am off my soap box. Just thought this was very good advice. It has helped me tremendously over the years.0 -
Welcome Sara and other new ones! I saw 2 or 3 other new ones and I have to go back and check your posts.
Thanks Fab, I have heard of the book but have not had a chance to buy and I caught a little of her on Oprah also. I may see what they have from her at libary since I do not buy books like this any more. Right now I am too busy to read it but with winter coming I should have some down time.
Have a good weekend everyone!:flowerforyou:0 -
Thanks for the welcome Melissa!
I figure that if I just continue saying "no", she will stop bringing them to me. It worked with the candy. When I stopped enthusiastically eating them in front of her, they stopped coming. And, I also think its ultimately not fair to expect someone who doesn't have my problem to never bring it into the house...although they can learn to stop pushing them on me. I think I need to learn some additional strategies as well.
Hi Titiana,
Now that I caught up on posts, I see why Diane posted what she did about ones close to you knowing about the problem. You need to be very honest with significant others, family and all friends. It is just like a drug addict or acholic not telling people about their problem. You are opening yourself up to needless pressure when you don't tell true friends. A true friend will be supportive. Examine the relationship if your friend is not supportive. I never use the words BED. Because most people do understand that but I use the word eating problem and food addiction. People really understand food addiction the most. They do not have to know more than that. If I tell a friend I have a food addiction and they still do things around me, I limit association with them quickly because they are harming me. Friends harmful to my goals are not helpful and the relationship is going to change.
I will give you an example. Last year I went on a seven day cruise. I was not in the room with my family but a good friend. Now she has known me at my heaviest weight. I have known her for over 20 years. I love her, seen her kids grow up, etc. She is a wonderful friend to me. She is there when I need her, but she does not get it about my food addiction. When we came off the cruise I wrote her a long letter and told her about the food issues. She never mentioned the letter to me and I asked her did she get it and she said yes. That is all I needed to know. We are still good friends but I will NEVER travel with her on another trip. Why?
Because this is the 2nd time she insists on bringing goodies into the room and leaving them around. If the food is there I will eat it. She brings milk duds, chips, Garretts popcorn, etc. She never hardly ate the stuff, I was the one eating it when she was not in the cabin!!! I ate most of the milk duds and chips. She had 3 canisters of pringles and they are not even my chip of choice. It is they were in the room so I would munch on them. I did very well on cruise otherwise and I maitained my weight and I felt so good about that. I may would have even lost a pound if it had not been for this stuff. I exercise everyday and kept my pedometor on because this makes me walk more for sure. I was not perfect but I did not binge eat at all even though I was constanly eating. I made healthier choices. Most nights I ate fish at dinner and for lunches I did the stir-frys a lot of days. Had treats only once or twice. (treats is like a juicy cheesburger or pancakes for breakfast) On previous cruises I would eat like a pig and constantly. I love big fattening breakfast and I would eat one all 7 days of cruise. This time I had the big fattening breakfast and that was on the very last day of cruise. What helped me do this? the people we sat with were healthy eaters and that helped me to order healthy also.
In my letter to my buddy I told her she does not get it. It is going to come up because I could not tell her I am NEVER going to travel with her in the future unless she respect ME by not having the junk food in the room. I don't care if she eats it around me but having it lying around, I WILL EAT IT when she is gone. I don't bring it into my place. Is this selfish? YES AND NO. If I were an achololic would she bring in beer or wine? NO. When I visited her house the last time I noticed she kept fruits out and I did not see the junk food out like normal. Her and her family still ate it but I never saw where it was stored so I did good that weekend. She lives in WI so I don't see her often anymore. But maybe she learned. we will see. I will ask her in the future before we go on anymore trips together. Like you I did not want to have the conversation because I figure she has known my struggle and would get it, but she did not. I wrote the letter which explained it all in the words of FOOD ADDICTION. I did not tell her I would not go on any trips with her. She has asked me to go with her to see her daughter in Panama, but I declined. Even though it will be hard I am going to have to have a discussion with her if I go with her on any more trips.
I am single and she is married and most of my friends are married and my sister never has money. Since I love to travel and she has money I need to go with her on trips if she is not going with husband or family. But if she does not respect my addiction to food, I am not going to put myself in that position again. And I will ask her if she can do this and I will be specific and if she feels she can not forgo her junk food I will understand. I get that because snacks are expensive to buy. Like I told her in her letter she can lock her stuff up and eat it but eat it and don't leave it out and tell me I am welcomed to it. It is toture. I was good then also because I only ate one of the pringles canisters in seven days because I would nibble on them daily and since they were not mines I would not going to eat all her stuff.
When I am in hotel rooms I have the staff clean refrig and take all junk they leave for us to buy out of the room. I explain I have a food addiction and if I eat the stuff I am not paying for it and they are happy to comply......:-)
Ok Titiania, I am done. I can get going sometimes. It is helpful and I hope it helps somebody else who may read it. Welcome to BED.0 -
I had a good day yesterday. I did volume eating (ate a big soup for lunch and a big salad for dinner). But I did not binge. I did not overeat at all really. I felt really comfortable and stayed within my calorie goal. I am also off to a good start today. This makes me hopeful. I was binging on sugar a lot. And I have been also finding that this almost always makes me go over the calorie goal, which is now set at 1 1/2 pounds a week or 1520 calories.
Getting a day was a big success for me.
Welcome Slansdown! One day at a time. Congrats on your good days and keep trying. Count your successful days and move on from the bad days. Postitive thinking is so important to us and not thinking we have to be perfect. That all or nothing thinking is hurtful for us. I call it stinking thinking......:-) One day at a time and never giving up. Those who are successful at anything in life are not quitters. Successful people never give up.....:-) You can do this! It is not easy but it can be done.0 -
Don't give up Accept who you are and then move forward. We are addicted to food and our life depends on working harder to control what we eat and what we do. Good luck and I also need good luck in making good choices.0
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Hey!
Went to my class today it is was good, I learned to put in change slowly so I don't go back into my old self. For me my goal is to limit my sugar so instead of going cold turkey like I always do and fail. I made a smaller goal to limit my sugar 5-10% for a week or two then limit it again for other week or two slowly so I don't go crazy. Also to get enough sleep which is really important as well never thought it was that important but it helps you to relieve your stress, Ghrelin is responsible for feelings of hunger. Leptin tells the brain when it’s time to stop. When you’re sleep deprived, your ghrelin levels increase at the same time that your leptin levels decrease. I'm also sent a goal for portion sizes so I don't overeat. Very good and will be going back for the other courses.
One is on stress, one is on contorling cravings. I will post more later I wish everyone a wonderful weekend.
Better food day working on my goals and didn't binge which was good. One step at a time.
Melissa0 -
Someone mentioned that I should be okay maintaining my weight. I agree that maintaing is so much better than gaining. I have been more consistant than I have ever been lately and all that means is that I have been logging in everything I eat. I think I am on day 38. So far I have lost 4 pounds, gained six and lost four again. I also not only logged it in, but now my food diary is set on public. It is embarassing sometimes, but I want to be honest with myself and others about why the overweight happened and what I am doing or what I am not doing in reaction to it. As of now I am 222.5 pounds and 5'8" tall, so I am about 83 pounds overweight. I have never been under 180 in my adult life. I am 27 years old and as I think about the things that are coming up in my life -- interviews, marriage and family and reaching those types of life goals, there are so many reasons to deal with this now. I want to heal. I do not want this success to be temporary. I have lose and gained 60 pounds 3 times? 4?
The binge eating group is helpful. So I will say that my goal right now is to wite everything and to have my day be either a lose day or a maintain day. One of the things I did was raised my calorie goal to about 1500 per day (1 1/2 pounds per week) and raise my exercise goal. I have almost met my exercise goal this week and am getting closer to the other nutritional goals. It was discouraging to see all of the red numbers. I did at someone else's suggestion, refrain from going to a buffet that my friend suggested last night. Instead we went to a Thai restaurant and that put me into the maintain category, but kept me safe from the binge one.0 -
Great job ladies!0
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Hi Mollie and Diane. Thanks for the feedback and sharing your experience. I guess I just felt burned last time I tried it that its made me afraid to do it again. But I agree with you that sharing is part of relationships. And although it will be a negotiation, we can work on coming up with strategies that seem fair to both of us.
And slansdown, great job suggesting someplace other than the buffet. Finding simple, practical strategies are part of your arsenal of protection. You CAN do this! We all can.
And Krymsen, nice work on chosing a small, measurable, and achievable goal. Abstinence is the best option for some things, and moderation for others. (and one option works better for some, and the other option works best for others) Its good to figure out what works for you. Looking forward to hearing more about what you are learning in class.0 -
Last night I was terriable. I had a binge for about 3 to 4 hours before going to bad. I did not even log it all. I know I should have but I did not. I probably would have if I had read post about whoever logged all 6000 calories. That is what I should have did because that is about how many calories I ate yesterday evening. Fridays and Saturday's are the worse. So today I worked out and now I am going to bed. under my 2000 calories per day with exercise calories to spare so today was good. I made it. Sunday is usually OK.
Hope your weekend is going OK. I will take 1 out of 2 days.......:-) It could have been 2, so I am happy to get myself back under control.
Yes we can Titiana!0 -
Recovery Meditations ~ Pain ~ One Day at a Time ~ October 23, 2010
:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:
RECOVERY MEDITATIONS
One Day at a Time
October 23, 2010
~ PAIN ~
:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:
"People are taught that pain is evil and
dangerous ... Pain is meant to wake us
up ... You feel your strength in the
experience of pain ...Your feelings are
part of you ... If you feel ashamed of
them, and hide them, you're letting
society destroy your reality. You should
stand up for your right to feel your
pain."
Jim Morrison of the Doors
:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:
I am what some might call a "pain
expert." Inside, Outside, Stuffed,
Unavoidable ~ there are so many kinds of
pain. I used to think that if I were
really
strong, I would never let pain
effect me, regardless of its source. And
there were plenty of sources. I walked
around with this smile on my face and
this wall built around me, trying to
ward off the pain.
Then one day I cracked. I lost someone
very close to me. When I actually
accepted that, I just broke down. There
was so much pain...pain I had been
avoiding for years. At that moment I was
confronted by all of it!
That was when I started to realize that
I couldn't go through life avoiding pain
-- it was still there and it would come
back. And it would be worse. Joining
this program and reading the Big Book
helped me to recognize my pain and feel
it. I'm now able to not fear it, but to
see it for what it is: a piece of me. I
grow from what I feel, including
pain. Without it I wouldn't be me.
ONE DAY AT A TIME . . .
I will feel my pain and I will do what
is necessary to accept it.
Together we
can see our strength. Together we are
bound by pain.
~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~0 -
Hi Ladies,
Mollie-thanks for sharing. :flowerforyou:
It really does help me to read everybody else's posts and read how you guys are doing and what you're doing and strategies, etc. It helps knowing that I'm not alone and that I've got a great support group to bounce ideas and information off of. Thank you all for being here.0 -
Checking in w/ you guys also helps to remind me that...."It's one day at a time."0
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Whereas before MFP I'd just keep going. One binge would turn into another and another and before I would know it I'd be completely off track again and back to my old habits. So I really do appreciate this support thread because it reminds me to stay on track and that just because I had a binge doesn't mean that I can't discontinue that behavior and get right back on track.
sorry for all the individual posts, but Mondays are a bad day to post for me...:ohwell:0 -
I did well on Fri & Sat but yesterday not so good. Today is going strong. Tonight I have to keep busy because I have to fast for a lab appt in the morning, so no food after 7:45pm. My goal is to eat supper and then go to the gym. If I'm working out I won't be thinking about food and then hopefully I'll be so exhausted by the time I get home I'll go right to bed. :happy:0
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Hey!
Bad food day but one good thing is I found an online meeting that meets alot during the day and evening so if I feel like binging I go to one of the meetings. It worked this afternoon so maybe I will keep going and when I feel it coming I will get the suporrt I need.
The web-site is http://www.oa.org/new-to-oa/
It is Overeaters Anonymous! I hope you all are have a good day!0 -
That is great Mel. I think it will be very beneficial to have a "on demand" support group. I may even look into this for myself cuz when 9pm rolls around and I'm bored and not tired it sure would be nice to have some peeps to chat with about not bingeing.0
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Melissa,
I did not know you do OA. A lot of the stuff I post is from OA emails I receive daily. They are called Recovery Meditations. I only post when I feel a really good one. I attend these when I can which is not often. I find the face to face meetings help me more. But the chats are good.
Diane,
Yes it definitely helps to know we are not alone. I love the daily posting also. Today was good so far. Sat and Sun went by without a binge also. Can you eat after your workout? If you are not usually hungry afer a workout OK. If you are then go straight to bed after coming from gym for sure. 2 out 3 for the weekend is good. I had 2 out 3 also.......:-) One day at a time.
Have a good week everyone! and keep posting and keep up the good work!! Thanks for your support!0 -
@Mollie-usually not hungry after a workout and then it takes me at least an hour or sometimes more to want food. Usually when I workout from 6-7pm I will eat dinner around 8pm and then after 9 is when I get in the mood to binge. I find that I have to be careful about what I eat for dinner so that I don't "set myself up" for a binge. I've found that I cannot have too many carbs for dinner and that my best bet is meat & veggies. Tonight (right now actually) I'm having homemade chili with a few noodles in it. And then I'll get ready and go to the gym until maybe 9pm or so and then by the time I wind down it will be time for bed and I should still be feeling not hungry. I also do not have any chocolate or ice cream in the house right now because I ate it all last week. I also need to find a happy medium with that. I don't think keeping that stuff in the house is a good idea but I also think I'm better off keeping something in the house so that when I do really want it I don't eat everything else trying to satisfy that craving. What do you guys do about junk food in the house?0
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OH, I almost forgot...I am piloting a new strategy for myself. We'll see how it goes. I read on another thread about people putting $ in a jar for a reward for when they have a good day. I have also been having a hard time justifying any more "new" clothes from the thrift stores because I'm broke and moving but I do need more "new" clothes and especially BRAS! so I decided that for starters I'm going to put a $5 bill in a vase every day I don't binge or even mini binge and if I do I have to take a $5 out. I know I cannot afford to do $5 for long but maybe for a few weeks and then go down to $1. I started on Fri and since I did good Fri & Sat I made $10 but lost $5 for yesterday so now back down to $5...soon to be $10 for today!
I set the $5 right out on top of the vase as a reminder every time I walk past it. You guys ever do anything like this? 0 -
OMG YOU SOUND JUST LIKE ME0
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Hey! dianeg1981
As for the junk food, I can not keep it in the house some days I'm good but on those bad binge days I eat it all so I don't keep it in the house.
Or what I do is make single serving of something if I'm really craving like single serving Mug cake of Muffin.
I was thinking about the money thing to, it might help. But I was also thinking of saving up for one thing like a trip of a new outfit or something like that.
I wish you best of luck,
Melissa0
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