support for Binge Eating Disorder

Krymsen

Hey! Mollie1037

I hear you about being alone that is the hardest time for me. What I found has helped aswell is to have some who you have to answer to.like a friend or family member. Mine is my hubby if I binge I talked it out with him to see why and what I can do next time.
Working out always makes me not want to eat so workout girl! Always remeber you are worth it! And you can do anything you put mind to.

Melissa

Krymsen

Hey!

Day number 5 no binging, It is going great but the craving still come and the stress but dealing with it really well! Yay!!!!!! Almost I week pat myself on the back! I think I can I think I can!

Melissa

Krymsen

Hey!

So the crap hit the fan I binged not happy with myself for doing it! Damn junk food can not be in the house at all time to get it out! Back to the start again. Don't now why I did it, I quess I was not in check with my emtions and was not on my game well I feel like crap tororrow will be better!

Melissa

IsMollyReallyHungry

Hey!

So the crap hit the fan I binged not happy with myself for doing it! Damn junk food can not be in the house at all time to get it out! Back to the start again. Don't now why I did it, I quess I was not in check with my emtions and was not on my game well I feel like crap tororrow will be better!

Melissa

Melissa,
Beating yourself up does not help any. One day at a time. You have done well. You had 4 days and maybe this week you will get 5. You are getting there. One day at a time.

hopeitworks

Melissa - Don't beat yourself up. You had one bad day. Don't think about the bad day, think about the last few good days you've had. Put yesterday behind you since you can't change it, and start again today. Good luck.

Also, just to let you know that you are not alone. I had one HORRIBLE day myself yesterday. I was so, so mad and disgusted with myself. That little binge monster that lives inside me totally took over. I seem to have a bad time on Sundays and I can't figure out why. So, I'm going to try and practice what I preach and put yesterday behind me and get on with it today. I already had a good breakfast and walked/ran for 50 minutes on the treadmill. Have a good day everyone.

Krymsen

Tks guys! It really helps!

I had a good well rounded breakfast so I hope it helps and I am putting it behind me. I used to binge everyday so I'm doing way better than before. I will not let this stop me no way. Hag in there to guys we can do this! I let myself get to relaxed and I was not in check with my emtions. One good thing no more junk in the house thank goodness.

Melissa

Behavior_Modification

Will have to catch up on posts tomorrow. But I'm here and doing okay.

IsMollyReallyHungry

~ SELF-SABOTAGE ~ :~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:. .:~*~:

"The truth is that our finest moments are most likely to occur when we are feeling deeply uncomfortable, unhappy, or unfulfilled. For it is only in such moments, propelled by our discomfort, that we are likely to step out of our ruts and start searching for different ways or truer answers." --M. Scott Peck..

ONE DAY AT A TIME . . . I will choose to accept myself as a person of worth. I will resist temptations to sabotage myself and I will choose good things for my life.

kerrymh

Just saw this tread and I'd just like to say this was me every other day until a year ago...I found OA, and it has really helped me. I used to eat enough food at drive thrus for a family of 3 or 4 and then go home and have 2 big bags of chips and 4 bars and icecream. It was insanity and depression and isolation and loneliness and boredome and low self esteem. I thought I knew what to do but could never make myself do it. Now with OA, I have clarity and one year plus of binge free days strung together. Its one day at a time. ANd I tell you I don't miss the old life one bit.

Behavior_Modification

Yes I've been busy but I've also been hesitant to post for fear of criticism and that is a horrible feeling. It seems to me like we have a member of the group that is too quick to give their opinion of what we do and why we do it and I want to be able to come here and type whatever I need to and talk about whatever I need to without fear of being put down because of it. So, without dragging on and on about this, I just ask that if you don't have anything nice to say to me or about my posts, please don't respond to my posts. This is such a sensitive subject for me and hearing nitpicking about what I say or how I feel will not do me any good, in fact it will have the exact opposite effect. I will hide.

Also, it seems like God has become a bigger part of this thread and for someone who is agnostic it is difficult for me to think about God giving me strength because that is not where I believe it comes from. I think it is more of a learned behavior that I need to keep teaching myself and learning every day.

IsMollyReallyHungry

Yes I've been busy but I've also been hesitant to post for fear of criticism and that is a horrible feeling. It seems to me like we have a member of the group that is too quick to give their opinion of what we do and why we do it and I want to be able to come here and type whatever I need to and talk about whatever I need to without fear of being put down because of it. So, without dragging on and on about this, I just ask that if you don't have anything nice to say to me or about my posts, please don't respond to my posts. This is such a sensitive subject for me and hearing nitpicking about what I say or how I feel will not do me any good, in fact it will have the exact opposite effect. I will hide.

Also, it seems like God has become a bigger part of this thread and for someone who is agnostic it is difficult for me to think about God giving me strength because that is not where I believe it comes from. I think it is more of a learned behavior that I need to keep teaching myself and learning every day.

Well I hope you do not decide to hide on us Diane.....:-) You are needed and welcomed here. I understand what you mean, but I would ignore such posts. I have seen them and hope it is not me. I think I am not too opinionated and I try to be open minded and not push my stuff on others like my opionion is the only way. We all have to find our way and they may be down different roads.

I recommend if someone is offending you to ignore their/our posts. That is what I do. I forgot what agnostic is but it does not matter either. If you don't believe in God or a Higher Power that is fine. I know when I 1st went to OA meeting in my twenties I felt it was too spiritual and not for me. But now that I am older I see it is OK for me after giving it another whirl. But it is not for everyone and I respect that. That is the reason why I will just post thoughts for meditation and that gives you the chance to read or not to read. You know I found this group from your posting to it so I do not want to lose you input and thoughts, plus I think it helps you posting everyday like you do. Ignore whoever is bothering you with their posts. That is what I do when I see a person is very pushy and opininated.

I see it often on MFP in a lot of areas and I just keep on stepping once I learn the user names and ignore completely. Because there is a difference in being supportive and pushing opionions as if they were a law. You rock!! and you are doing so good, just skip over the negative stuff because there are so many positive things about our group!

We can't lose you.....:-) :flowerforyou:

Krymsen

Hey!

We are all here for surport what works for one does not work for all! Not to say stop posting just be kind and loving for we are all here for strength and growing. This is a very hard Disorder to deal with and we are at different points in our lives so like dianeg said just be mind full when posting tks.

Anyway I have had 2 days no binging back on the wagon. I'm trying to eat every 3 hours and write down how hungry I am and what emtion I'm feeling at that time. And eating what I would like just a small portion and taking my time to enjoy the food I like. Instead of just eating something because I know it is low cal or healthy. I've been reading this book called:

The Rules of "Normal" Eating: A Commonsense Approach for Dieters, Overeaters ...
By Karen R. Koenig

Melissa

katya143

Hi! I am sooo happy that you brought this up. I would love to join in the BED support group. Im so tired of eating so much and never feeling like its enough. I dont know how to stop it. I do very well for a while and then Ill have a cheat meal and all hell breaks loose. I will eat many chocolate bars, donuts, chips and LOTS of peanut butter ( just off the spoon). I am very depressed about it too. I binged all weekend and now I just want to sit inside on this beautiful day and cry at how discusting i am. Why is it so hard to gain control over this? I really feel i need the support.

yes...the peanut butter!!! i just try to avoid having these things around the house...for me its bread with butter, anything that spreads...Like a whole block of phili cream cheese w/ a whole block of crackers, a whole jar of peanut butter, a whole container of hummus...anything like that... i just try to avoid having these things around the house knoing i cant control myself...

Behavior_Modification

Mel, thanks for mentioning the book. I think it's time for me to make a trip to the library. When I first started out last winter I was at the library every couple weeks getting new books but for the past several months I haven't read a thing and I think it's definitely time for me to pick another book up. They are so helpful and encouraging.

saimabhaidani

OMG!

I just cant simply thank you enough for starting this thread. It makes me feel I am not alone in this. I can so relate to all of you because I KNOW its not about having a big meal, or just simply overeating, it is about when you........... when you...... man I cant even bring myself to say it out in the open! I am not brave like all of you, maybe. But thank you for all of your posts. I have been good since this saturday after a 10,000+ cal. binge. I just HOPE I stay good...... I just HOPE.

Krymsen

Hey!

So I binged today trying to do something different so it takes time to make a change. Not betting myself up just moving on with the rest of the day, it will be better. Back to square one again!

Melissa

Good thing is I only binged two times this week, A big change from last month when I was binging everyday sometimes more than once. So getting there.

IsMollyReallyHungry

I started back going to TOPS last Thursday. I actually had fun and fit in. I guess absence was good because the group was actually happy to see me and I felt it was genuine. I brought in a wraper from Vitalious Brownies and it was cool. I had lost 14 pounds since July 1st on their scales. So I am going to try to go to TOPS every week. My membership expires in May and I am going to see if I like it enough to join again. This is my 1st time and experience with TOPS and it has been rocky. Not sure if it is me or them. I think a little of both. More me than them actually.....:-)

I have not been binging but I have been overeating for sure and hitting the halloween candies at work!! Bummer but I must say I am journaling it all. Trying to get a handle of it and it is hard since TOM is on the way.

Melissa,
I love your attitude. Finding the positives in your binges is good stuff. Keep it up!! Yes we are not perfect and you are doing some things very good even though you relapse at times. Focusing on the good and how far you have come is great for you!! Good job!

Welcome Ontrac!! I love your avatar about not being judgemental!! Where do you guys find all of these wonderful avatars.....:-) Yes you are not alone. HOPE is alive here! Posting helps also. We don't bite.

Diane,
Reading stuff is good. Keeps us mindful even if it is stuff we already know. I always say I know enough to write my own book on this stuff. Haha!! I have not read a book on this subject in a while, may be time to do so. I get so many emails that I read and they are shorter and daily and I pick and choose the ones I find I need at that particular time.


Happy HUMP day all and have a wonderful week!! Yes we can control binging. Consistency not perfection is one of the keys! :flowerforyou:

hopeitworks

Mollie - What is TOPS? I don't think I've ever heard of it.
It's really amazing to realize that there are so many of us struggling with this evil binge problem. It's good to know that you are not alone and have the support of other members here. I just wish I could figure it out and stop the binging once and for all. I really don't understand how I can go for a few days without binging and then let all hell break loose. I really hate the way I feel about myself after that binge monster takes over, but then I will read some of your posts and it helps me feel a little better.
Good luck to everyone and I hope you all have a great day.

Behavior_Modification

Happy Weds to you as well! I've been eating so-so for the past week. Not horrible, not great. Definitely binged last night before bed and scarfed down about 1000 calories extra. I did so well at the gym again last night that I "rewarded" myself with some chocolate and then I couldn't control my urges. I feel like such an addict when it happens. I was perfectly aware of what I was doing last night while shoving more in, but I WANTED IT! It's like such a powerful force taking over that is telling me I HAVE TO HAVE IT. And then I go from normal mode to crazy fiend lady who needs her fix. UGH, I HATE IT!

But today is a new day and I was delighted to see a 0.5lb loss on the scale (although I'll need to see it again before counting it on my ticker) and I'm taking a walk with my friend after work and it will be a good day!

Behavior_Modification

Also, Mollie, I'm so glad you are having a good experience with TOPS. I belonged to a group a few years ago that were more interested in social hour than losing weight and it was so unmotivating.

Krymsen

Hey!

Bad binge day! I'm really trying it feels like I'm going no where fast. I have been to support grops been reading books reaching out to my family and nothing seems to be helping.

I know I'm the one who puts the food in and makes the chioces. I kind of wish someone else would do it for me. I'm a mom so I always put myself last so when I started my weight loss it was the first time I thought about me. But I feel hopeless with this. It seems I can't get it. It is a never ending cyle.

I so good for a couple of days and then bang it hits me again. I just don't know.

Trying to move on and not think about it.

Melissa

Behavior_Modification

Trying to move on and not think about it.

That's the best thing you can do right now. :flowerforyou:

vikkij12

www.shrinkyourself.com

I have found the above site to be really good it has really hit the spot on a lot of issues which I am working on, gives insite as to why we do things and then if we can do that we can work on them.

Have a good day

tatiana_13

Hi all. I've just found your group. I've struggled with BED for a long time. To make a long story short: I found strategies to deal with it. They work best when I live alone and am single, unfortunately. Fortunately, I'm not single at the moment! Unfortunately, my strategies aren't working so well (no binge foods in the house, I avoid food with flour and sugar--the abstinence model except with a few exceptions). I actually fear going over to my girl friends house because eating her food will trigger a later binge.

And she buys me candy. And she works in a bakery. Ah! She, of course, is athletic, active, and slim.

So, I'm trying to be more abstinent with my abstinence. That helped in the past. It's a struggle, but I have never been able to eat one cookie, one Danish, one slice of cake. One turns to two, turns to whole cake, with a side of cookies, bag of chips, and a pizza. If I don't start the chain, the binge won't happen.

Also, when I do binge, I try to just accept it. It's done, I'm not going to beat myself up for it, AND, I'm not going to binge again tomorrow just because I binged today.

I don't claim it always works, but it helps mr sometimes.

slansdown

Today was a bad food day. Most days are not great. I have not yet gotten a day under calorie goal in the 30 or 40 days I have been counting my food. I think that I will try to connect better with this set of posts. I went to a Chinese food buffet. I seem to find one in every city. During lunch hour, I ate two days worth of food. I am sad about it, and I am starting to get hopeless that I will lose weight, or find within me the willingness that I have found in the past. I don't know where it is.

Krymsen

Welcome slansdown & tatiana

Slansdown- I understand I'm going through the same things right know. What I'm trying is not to worry so much about food I talk about it think it and it consumes most of my day. So I'm trying to fill my day with something else to keep me busy. One idea for your lunch time is go to a Market or grocery store and buy your lunch there. Because then you have a bigger slection and fresh fruit and veg without all the extras.

tatiana_13- I understand about the whole not be able to eat just one cookie, That my problem too, people think I'm crazy not treating myself same but it just puts me in a binge as well. So I'm going to try not to strat with my triggers. Have you tryed telling your girlfriends about your problem? Then it will be easyeir for you to say no without feeling guilty about. And good job about not feeling bad.

Good luck to you guys and Welcome

Melissa

tatiana_13

Thanks for the welcome Melissa!

I suppose I could tell my girlfriend. But most people just have a really hard time understanding bingeing as a disorder. And when its portrayed on tv and documentaries, the visual is always morbid obesity. And its often really just "big eaters" rather than real bingers. So people look at me and don't believe I have a disorder. This actually became a big problem in a past relationship. Long term where we lived together. Even when I expressly asked her not too, she would *bake brownies* and then say, one isn't going to hurt you! So I'm not so keen on trying to have this discussion with another person. Its a little painful to be in a situation where you are not only explaining something to someone, but then have to defend it. [Honey, I'm a heroin addict. No really. I can't have any. No, Heroin IS addictive. No, I can''t just shoot up once a month. No, I don't want crack for my birthday...]

I figure that if I just continue saying "no", she will stop bringing them to me. It worked with the candy. When I stopped enthusiastically eating them in front of her, they stopped coming. And, I also think its ultimately not fair to expect someone who doesn't have my problem to never bring it into the house...although they can learn to stop pushing them on me. I think I need to learn some additional strategies as well.

And to slansdown.... sometimes find it easier to "make the choice before the choice." So, instead of going to an Indian buffet and then trying not to overeat (my version of the Chinese buffet), I just don't go if I can help it. Generally, I don't go anyplace marked "buffet." Melissa is spot on about going to a healthier place to eat. Once you get there, choosing better food won't be as hard. Making the choice before the choice often works better than trying to be "a really disciplined person" and making "the right choice" in a bad situation...trying to make yourself order the tasteless iceberg lettuce salad at a pizza joint is something only a saint would do. And most of us are not saints. Trying to lose weight at the same time you are actively binging may also be too much (not saying it is for you, but just something to think about). Although people tell you "losing weight is easy...just eat healthier!" they are lying. Its hard. Its tough. Its spiritually taxing. Not every moment, but enough moments certainly are. So if you are feeling bad about yourself not just because you are binging but also because you are not losing weight, its hard to stay motivated. My first "weight loss goal" was simply to maintain. For me, it was the right thing at the right time. I needed to be happy about my successes in cutting down on binging and overeating before I could focus on weight loss.

Behavior_Modification

Hi Ladies,

I'm here and doing okay. It's been a so so week across the board. Each day I've basically been having mini binges at night before bed. Even last night when I thought I'd be fine because my mouth hurt from all the dental work I had yesterday afternoon. Isn't it funny how I have no problem shoving sweets in even when it hurts. I know you understand. This mini bingeing is bad, it is my typical binge behavior and I do want so badly to change my behavior so I will continue keeping at it and trying new things each and every day so that I can learn this new behavior.

I also have to stay away from buffets. I went with my fiancee to one last weekend that had lots of healthy choices and I was so good with the food ( I had a big salad w/ ff dressing, a bunch of fresh fruit, sirloin steak, and just a spoonful of a few other not so healthy items) and then when it was time to choose dessert I was way too weak. I wanted one of this and one of that and before I knew it I was walking back to the table with an entire dinner place full of junk. I ate about 1/3 of it and started feeling sick so we left (a blessing actually). I like it when junk food and/or overeating makes me feel ill because otherwise I will keep eating. I wish it always did that. That would surely ward off the binges.

slansdown

I had a good day yesterday. I did volume eating (ate a big soup for lunch and a big salad for dinner). But I did not binge. I did not overeat at all really. I felt really comfortable and stayed within my calorie goal. I am also off to a good start today. This makes me hopeful. I was binging on sugar a lot. And I have been also finding that this almost always makes me go over the calorie goal, which is now set at 1 1/2 pounds a week or 1520 calories.

Getting a day was a big success for me.

Behavior_Modification

I have found it so helpful that my immediate friends and family know exactly what is going on with me and why I'm doing what I'm doing. I agree that the general population doesn't not understand binge eating the way we need them to. This does indeed make it very difficult to talk about it. I do not discuss my "condition" with just anyone but those who I am closest to have to know. If they don't know then it would be a constant struggle every time an indulgence situation arose. It was very weird in the beginning when I first started telling people and trying to explain it but now that it is my ongoing lifestyle, they respect my decisions and are very understanding. They no longer question why I turn things down, they no longer are offended when I don't eat what they eat, holidays are easier, parties are easier. It is an addiction and we need to take the necessary precautions to keep it in check. I encourage us all to talk to our family & friends and let them know what is going on with us. It will help.