My husband won't diet with me

bcattoes

Only prepare enough for one serving each. He can' tdish more out if there is no more.

pippywillow

It was fun reading the replies to this thread.

The submission is not something my husband expects or asks of me. I believe it's how God has called me to live, it simply means I'm here to support him as the head of our family and he's here to lead. I feel blessed to be able to serve in this way.

Of course I could just cook less. But I cook simply, I buy a pound of meat and cook it, or make a batch of biscuits or one recipe of whatever. We eat a relatively balanced diet, and not an abundance of processed food. The weight is from home-made biscuits, and beef stew, and macaroni and cheese.

I asked him last night if he was trying to fatten himself up, and he says "well someone's gotta make up for it."

I do believe he'll come around in time.

Mainebikerchick

When he takes that extra scoop of ice cream smack him on the side of the head (fairly hard) and say something like "are you f*cking kidding me". Next time he goes for the extra scoop he will remember that smack and your b!tchy words. This will also lay down a great relationship dynamic.

:laugh:

Justkeepswimmin

I too believe, but fail daily, with wifely submission. I don't believe this makes us unequal, just different in our roles. So just ignore the people blasting away at that concept and look for helpful advice.

1) repeated numerous time: cook and buy less. you can tell him you don't want the kids learning unhealthy habbits.

2)) You've seen many many stories of men coming around eventually to their wives changes in lifestyle. I find men, in general, take more time to adjust to life changes. Emotionally, when it came to a grief instance in our lives, he was generally 6 months to 2 years behind. When it came to weight loss he was about a year behind. It took the cardiologist telling my husband if he didn't change he was "going down". My husband has been able to cut his insulin more than in 1/2 since then (he's a type 1 so it will never totally go away) He's lost about 20 lbs, but its slower for him being older and having the diabetes. He works out 4-5 days a week, and I'm just so glad he is trying. He was verging on obese but never actually hit obese when the doctor said that. Maybe see if you're husband is open to scheduling his yearly physical?

3) make non condescending sincere praise when he does come around. When I saw him sacrifice for so long, I told him how proud of him I was. How I am so greatful that he wants to stay around for us, and he loves US (more than the burger)

4) Since he fears for my safety constantly, at first I would say I wanted to go for a walk after dinner (in the dark) he would come to make sure I was safe

5) you're married, so the bj thing is allowed, and may have some merit.

Hodgie12345

Tell him you want to start Swinging and if he doesnt get fit he wont get to play. Trust me, that will do it. Hodgie x

2FatToRun

Only prepare enough for one serving each. He can' tdish more out if there is no more.

What stops him from going to the corner fast food joint because1 serving isnt enough to feed his fat?

cwolfman13

wifely submission means honoring that your spouse is the head of house and the leader of the home. He is her covering. it means that she respects and loves her husband.

Excuse me while I go get sick. The archaic notion that a wife should be submissive to her husband is inequality at the least, abusive at its worst. I still can't believe that these beliefs in the natural role of a wife still exist in the developed world.

K....my wife loves me and respects me...but if I told her that she needed to submit to her to really show that, I'd have a high heel up my *kitten*.

I didn't know that anyone actually still did this wives submit to your husbands stuff...it's like 2013.

pippywillow

ask him when was the last time he saw his penis....thats what got me motivated to lose weight

There's no nice way to say that, believe me I've tried

thoshowski

Try to cook less. If he takes what's left, then make sure there is less left for him to take. My fiancé always does the same thing, if there is some pizza left he will eat it rather than packing it away. I just started packing my lunch, and his that way there is two less servings for either of us to eat.

jonnythan

Divorce the *kitten*. You deserve better.

Seriously? Eating too much food is grounds for divorce now?

Kimdbro

"Wifely Submission....."



Never heard of it....my wife just puts her foot up my *kitten* when I do something she doesn't like.

^^awesomeness^^ lol

BigDave1050

Hand him a mirror and a copy of the obituary's! Tell him you love him and that the man in the mirror is going to end up in the paper if he doesn't start taking care of himself!

thisismeraw

Unfortunately you can't make him want to change. If the topic of health comes up maybe just explain to him that you are worried about him. Explain that you want him to be around as long as possible and able to play with the kids.

When you make dinner, don't cook extras (or pack them up right away and put in the fridge or freezer for lunches or other meals). When you are just sitting watching TV see if he wants to go for a family walk... or bike ride... or walk to the park for the kids to play, etc.

He may of not changes his habits much since you started trying to lose weight. Maybe with your old habits you just didn't notice his as much as you do now?

Maliaball

Haha....sounds like something my husband would say. (Seriously it would probably work though).

MyM0wM0w

YOu're his wife, not his mother. If he wants to eat himself to death and leave you to raise his children alone then the only thing you can do is what was mentioned by someone else. Make sure his life insurance is paid up and be sure he prepares a will.

You can only control you and what you do. Get healthy because your kids are going to need at least one parent there to take care of them.

joleenl

I think people are way to caught up on the wifely submissive part....

Let me just say, I am big on womens rights. I personally do not believe in Wifely submission. However if that's what works for you all the power to you. I know, our house is very traditional or old fashion in someways, which could be considered sexist, but that's what works for us and our personalities. I do all the cooking and cleaning. I do almost all the shopping. I do the laundry. I do the dishes. My hubby is a workalohic because he wants to provide more for us, so in turn I make sure he doesn't life a finger at home... other then yard work. I pretty much serve him his food. However he doesn't expect it, he is greatful for it, and I like to do it because he works so hard for us. My hubby works 2 full time jobs and trust me we don't really need the money. So when I get home from my full time job, I see as my job... to get the household stuff done. To be honest.... I would do all the household stuff probably either way. I like to take care of my man. It's who I am...

paintlisapurple

promise him a BJ for every pound he loses.... i bet he'll drop weight like nobody's business.

sorted

LOL. :laugh:

Oooops. I read that as, "PB&J" at first. LOLOL!!!!!!!!!! :blushing:

cindylu35

Have you ASKED HIM why he's eating more lately? Have you ASKED HIM to eat less with you? If he loves you, he will give you an answer to both of these questions.

WE don't know why he's doing what he's doing and you can't make him diet with you either, should he say no. But if he insists on eating more than you on purpose, that's between him and his heart attack. It would really mean he doesn't respect you, his body, your marriage and your efforts to become healthy.

Keep on doing what you are doing and all you can do is have that "talk" with him. His response will give you all the answers you need.ASK HIM!! He may surprise you!

Charles4Jesus

How long have you been cutting back? My answer would be TIME. If you continue to make healthier choices, he will follow. I know I was on MFP first, then my wife got an account. I had lost some weight then hit a plateau. I started not really paying attention to what I was eating, then she started counting her calories and it has re-motivated me. If this is just a week or two thing, just give him some time.

2FatToRun

I think people are way to caught up on the wifely submissive part....

Let me just say, I am big on womens rights. I personally do not believe in Wifely submission. However if that's what works for you all the power to you. I know, our house is very traditional or old fashion in someways, which could be considered sexist, but that's what works for us and our personalities. I do all the cooking and cleaning. I do almost all the shopping. I do the laundry. I do the dishes. My hubby is a workalohic because he wants to provide more for us, so in turn I make sure he doesn't life a finger at home... other then yard work. I pretty much serve him his food. However he doesn't expect it, he is greatful for it, and I like to do it because he works so hard for us. My hubby works 2 full time jobs and trust me we don't really need the money. So when I get home from my full time job, I see as my job... to get the household stuff done. To be honest.... I would do all the household stuff probably either way. I like to take care of my man. It's who I am...

You should probably update your profile says you arent married.