Ideas for *witty* responses to healthy haters

Options
123457

Replies

  • Capt_Inzane
    Capt_Inzane Posts: 733 Member
    Options
    When you die I'll still be alive.
  • ryry_
    ryry_ Posts: 4,966 Member
    Options
    So a close relative remarked, " You can still see the roots on those," as I was happily eating lightly broiled brussels sprouts.
    "Yeah, you know where they came from," I responded.

    She continued her rant about eating vegetables. My quip did not make her laugh or shut up.

    I need better, smart-*kitten*, but funny quips/comebacks that will shut people up. I haven't found anything online. Come on, there had to be funny healthy people, right?

    In this particular situation, "well judging by that gut you'll be buried somewhere under neath those roots soon."
  • ncahill77
    ncahill77 Posts: 501 Member
    Options
    If they are eating something bad while you are being healthy just offer to staple it to their @ss and save them some time.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    Options
    tumblr_m81v758BKv1rcfputo1_500.gif
  • stumblinthrulife
    stumblinthrulife Posts: 2,558 Member
    Options
    Reading through some of the responses in this thread, it's amazing the sense of superiority eating vegetables seems to give some people.

    Great attempt at trolling!

    Not looking to troll at all. Straight up observation of how some of the responses come across.
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    Options
    Reading through some of the responses in this thread, it's amazing the sense of superiority eating vegetables seems to give some people.

    Great attempt at trolling!

    Not looking to troll at all. Straight up observation of how some of the responses come across.

    dude, im vegetarian. in my world, we cant use the same bathroom. hahahahaa.
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
    Options
    I would just ask them what their secret for staying thin is... you're open to anything! (hopefully they could stand to lose a few heeheh)
  • yourenotmine
    yourenotmine Posts: 645 Member
    Options
    Well... I'm a vegetarian. Once my coworker saw me eating mushrooms and said "eeew, you're eating fungus", and I replied, "well, I just watched you eat a corpse, so what do you care?". Not my finest hour, but she stopped talking about my food.
  • TJMiddaugh
    TJMiddaugh Posts: 67 Member
    Options
    be like ***** you need some ANTI OXIDANTS! lookin all wrinkly with your cheese fries haha just kidding a friend asked me once what to say to this girl that insulted him at a football game and he wanted something funny to say back to her but in a health food way. thats what i came up with...
  • nikilis
    nikilis Posts: 2,305 Member
    Options
    Well... I'm a vegetarian. Once my coworker saw me eating mushrooms and said "eeew, you're eating fungus", and I replied, "well, I just watched you eat a corpse, so what do you care?". Not my finest hour, but she stopped talking about my food.

    did that really happen, or were you really by yourself, tripping on mushrooms?
  • yourenotmine
    yourenotmine Posts: 645 Member
    Options
    Well... I'm a vegetarian. Once my coworker saw me eating mushrooms and said "eeew, you're eating fungus", and I replied, "well, I just watched you eat a corpse, so what do you care?". Not my finest hour, but she stopped talking about my food.

    did that really happen, or were you really by yourself, tripping on mushrooms?
    Yes, it did happen. She was not, obviously, eating a human. However, since I work in an animal hospital, I thought it was apt.
  • FlaxMilk
    FlaxMilk Posts: 3,452 Member
    Options
    ssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss2333333333333333333333333333333333333.sx nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

    My cat's response.

    "So's your face" works for pretty much everything.
  • runs4zen
    runs4zen Posts: 769 Member
    Options
    I get crap for how I order food in restaurants--nonfat, grilled, sauce on side, no butter or oil...you know the drill. My typical response to passive aggressive criticism is always "Can you believe I'm 48?" That typically shuts them up. As for a previous poster's observation on feeling superior...not even remotely. I don't care how other's eat but I care when they get lippy about how I'm eating.
  • theskinnyonme
    theskinnyonme Posts: 443 Member
    Options
    Just say you'd rather treat your body as a temple instead of a dumpster. :bigsmile:
  • AngelicxAnnihilation
    AngelicxAnnihilation Posts: 336 Member
    Options
    "cool story bro, tell it again with more vegetables"
  • SolanumSunrise
    SolanumSunrise Posts: 244 Member
    Options
    Well... I'm a vegetarian. Once my coworker saw me eating mushrooms and said "eeew, you're eating fungus", and I replied, "well, I just watched you eat a corpse, so what do you care?". Not my finest hour, but she stopped talking about my food.

    One of my co-workers did the same to me and I just asked him, "well, do you eat cheese?". He shut up.
  • rachaelbarton
    rachaelbarton Posts: 57 Member
    Options
    That's the point when I usually launch into the vegetable's many positive attributes; i.e. what it does for eyesight, skin, hair, memory, etc. Then people get interested. They realize that you 1) know what you're doing and 2) are willing to share your expertise with them. Next thing you know they'll be eating them too! :)
  • rachaelbarton
    rachaelbarton Posts: 57 Member
    Options
    Good call.
  • Gyroid
    Gyroid Posts: 12
    Options
    I don't care about haters.

    I'm too busy being awesome.

    I have to second this. ^_^
  • runs4zen
    runs4zen Posts: 769 Member
    Options
    I don't care about haters.

    I'm too busy being awesome.

    I have to second this. ^_^

    Hell yeah! Me three!

Categories