Intermittent Farting.

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  • quitmakingexcuses
    quitmakingexcuses Posts: 906 Member
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    Hahahaha when I clicked on the link there was an ad on the side of the page with a girl wearing a shirt that said "I pooped today!" :laugh:
  • CaseyP1207
    CaseyP1207 Posts: 148 Member
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    But how many calories does it burn and do I need to eat them back?
    Eat the farts or the calories burned????
  • BinaryPulsar
    BinaryPulsar Posts: 8,927 Member
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    I didn't think this would be funny, but it actually was.
  • SovanJedi
    SovanJedi Posts: 27 Member
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    I love you guys.
  • foochick
    foochick Posts: 105 Member
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    I just sharted... Does that count as extra, or IF to failure?
    OMG...i laughed so hard i peed a little.
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
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    This thread stinks.
  • KaleidoscopeEyes1056
    KaleidoscopeEyes1056 Posts: 2,996 Member
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    Hahahaha when I clicked on the link there was an ad on the side of the page with a girl wearing a shirt that said "I pooped today!" :laugh:

    I want said shirt. Mine is an ad about Juan who works in mines... Well, damn, that was depressing. :cry:
  • slim_photographer
    slim_photographer Posts: 310 Member
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    At last, a program where I can incorporate hot pockets! Though the I part in IF will be impossible as the F part will be explosive and mostly continuous.
  • Avandel
    Avandel Posts: 283 Member
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    Oh, and does Intermittent Farting jumpstart my metabolism? I know it jumpstarts the metabolism of those around me as they sprint to get out of range!

    Yes, it has been known to jumpstrart your own but only if it's a square fart. Those tend to make you apply extra pressure for the release thus revving your metabolism! :bigsmile:
  • Long_and_Lean
    Long_and_Lean Posts: 175 Member
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    UGH YOU PEOPLE! Clearly you have no idea what you are talking about. You're all forgetting to count your FART MACROS. Seriously, if you don't meet your daily fart macros, you may as well go sucking on a tailpipe and replenish all that gas because it was all WORTHLESS!!!


    also, this thread is full of so much win.
  • bellesouth18
    bellesouth18 Posts: 1,070 Member
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    Omg! I'm laughing so hard I'm crying!!! LOL!!

    Me, too! :laugh: This is the funniest thread ever! I'm looking for a new program to follow and need to know if the program is good for all age and fitness levels. And what about walking farts?
  • dandaninc
    dandaninc Posts: 392
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    Should I fart in the morning to boost my metabolism?
  • dandaninc
    dandaninc Posts: 392
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    Oh, and does Intermittent Farting jumpstart my metabolism? I know it jumpstarts the metabolism of those around me as they sprint to get out of range!

    I hear it only works if you eat your breakfast. There's lots of eggs in breakfasts. And I read on http://www.heptune.com/farts.html "eggs and meat are notorious for producing smelly farts"

    Awesome. I should have read more. I know what I'm doing tomorrow!!!! DONE AND DONE!
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    Should I fart in the morning to boost my metabolism?

    You have to eat before you fart or you'll have nothing to fart. That's like running on empty. You need fuel to fart.
  • LaurySch
    LaurySch Posts: 277 Member
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    :laugh: :sad: This thread has made my day! Can we all please get together in real life? None of my real life friends get this kind of thing: u-tubes, qweefs, Depends...

    I'm still laughing
  • Avandel
    Avandel Posts: 283 Member
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    Should I fart in the morning to boost my metabolism?

    Like I said, Make it a square one & you'll be fine!:laugh:
  • dandaninc
    dandaninc Posts: 392
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    Should I fart in the morning to boost my metabolism?

    You have to eat before you fart or you'll have nothing to fart. That's like running on empty. You need fuel to fart.

    So true. Thank you. I hope my wife is prepared for the excitement that is Intermittent Farting.
    I'm going to be F-N RIPPED!!!!!!!
  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,143 Member
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    Can I end up in Starvation Fart Mode if I don't rip enough?
  • bellesouth18
    bellesouth18 Posts: 1,070 Member
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    what % of your farts are carb farts, protein farts and fat farts?

    They are all protein farts. If they aren't, you are doing it wrong.


    However when you refer to them you can call them "fat farts".

    For example if it's a conversation near the squat cage:

    "Hey bro hows you program going bro"
    "Yo man it's going great I'm on IF, lots of big fat farts"

    *pause*


    *FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!*

    pause


    *squeeeeeak*


    pause


    Sidesteal, you are one crazy dude with a wacky sense of humor. :tongue: :tongue: :tongue:
  • sglato
    sglato Posts: 28 Member
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    Do you get extra calories for skid marks?
    HAHA!! Hilarious:bigsmile:

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