Men..Is your wife outta shape?

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  • jynxxxed
    jynxxxed Posts: 1,010 Member
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    When I began dating my boyfriend (around 4 1/2 years ago) him and I both gained weight once we moved in together. We'd spend the majority of our time going out to dinner, getting drinks, watching movies and eating.. just constant eating. We both gained (I gained around 80 pounds) and I'm not sure what he gained.

    It wasn't because we didn't have to worry about how we looked anymore.. it was just a common interest that we both had and it went waaaay out of control.
  • joe7880
    joe7880 Posts: 92 Member
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    My wife and I both lost weight since we got married in Jan 2011. She lost 50 lbs and I lost a little over 40 lbs so far. Our motivation to live a healthier lifestyle is based on wanting to teach our future children how to live healthy (IMO the best way to teach a kid anything is to lead by example), and to live a long life. We also enjoy being active together.

    I guess my point is getting married doesn't mean you will gain weight.
  • Charliesuccess
    Charliesuccess Posts: 181 Member
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    MrSassypants is on here, I hope he does answer this thread.

    I let myself go, he never said a word about it, just loved me for who I am. He was more concerned about how unhappy I was with myself than the extra 60 pounds I had gained. Now we are both working hard to be smokin' naked.
    Now, that's love! Thanks for sharing
  • Charliesuccess
    Charliesuccess Posts: 181 Member
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    My wife and I both lost weight since we got married in Jan 2011. She lost 50 lbs and I lost a little over 40 lbs so far. Our motivation to live a healthier lifestyle is based on wanting to teach our future children how to live healthy (IMO the best way to teach a kid anything is to lead by example), and to live a long life. We also enjoy being active together.

    I guess my point is getting married doesn't mean you will gain weight.
    It helps when your life partner wants to share in a healthy lifestyle..some people do have spouse who truly dont care if there weight effects the other person. Glad your not one of them.
  • slim_photographer
    slim_photographer Posts: 310 Member
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    Idk I never pay attention :wink: most likely not
  • Charliesuccess
    Charliesuccess Posts: 181 Member
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    they call it "happy weight"
    :happy:
  • rml_16
    rml_16 Posts: 16,414 Member
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    So men tell me is it true! After you married your wife or started dating your girlfriend exclusively did she begin gaining weight?
    A few single girlfriends and I were having this conversation and one of my friends said she felt like she was going to have to become fat and nasty in order to find a man to marry.
    I wasnt offended because I myself have lost over 100lbs "before" I married my husband...but I was wondering if her perception of married women was true....are more single women thin, and more married women over weight?

    There are a lot of factors to consider. When you get into a relationship, you eat more. You go out, you cook for each other, whatever, and you don't really think about it. You get complacent because you're too comfortable with each other. You spend hours snuggling instead of exercising. It is very normal form women AND men to gain weight when they get into a relationship for those reasons.

    Those are just things you have to be aware of and then you probably won't fall into that so much.

    But women who have been married a while and have kids and a house to run and sometimes I full-time job on top of it all get lost in their busy lives and a lot of them just put themselves last and the result is you become less fit. This won't happen to everyone, but these are the reasons behind it.
  • marthathebear
    marthathebear Posts: 498
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    I am speaking from my past experiences. When you are very happy & content in a relationship it is easy to not worry about weight and fitness. You have so many other obligations and he still loves you. I finally decided he deserves better and lost weight and I'm happier and he is very happy and it is great! If you have a good marriage and you are out of shape, think how happy you would be with more confidence in your body and yourself. I know I am.
  • tinana_RN
    tinana_RN Posts: 541 Member
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    So men tell me is it true! After you married your wife or started dating your girlfriend exclusively did she begin gaining weight?
    A few single girlfriends and I were having this conversation and one of my friends said she felt like she was going to have to become fat and nasty in order to find a man to marry.
    I wasnt offended because I myself have lost over 100lbs "before" I married my husband...but I was wondering if her perception of married women was true....are more single women thin, and more married women over weight?

    I'm guessing your friends have a lot of other reasons for not being able to find the right man to marry, if they're basically saying that only fat and nasty women are able to get married. Men don't want to marry all types of women.
  • emmalouc93
    emmalouc93 Posts: 328 Member
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    Why is EVERY single thread on this interrupted by the morality police lately - if you don't agree, don't click on it. IT'S REALLY SIMPLE.


    I gained weight after getting with my boyfriend, that is why I am here. If he were to talk about it here, I wouldn't be hurt because knowing us, he would have said it to me before hand. If not, I'd see it as a kick up the *kitten* to cop on.

    That is all.
  • Justjoshin
    Justjoshin Posts: 999 Member
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    Bash all the spouses!!!!
  • shanice_22
    shanice_22 Posts: 202 Member
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    I found that I started to put on weight when me and my boyfriend started our relationship and I've noticed other women I know have done as well. I think it's because we get "comfortable" and aren't trying to impress anyone (since we've already found someone) that we tend to put on weight in relationships.

    I don't intend to put weight back though once I reach the size that I want to.
  • Charliesuccess
    Charliesuccess Posts: 181 Member
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    I joke with my husband that he could divorce me because of fraud. I've gained 90lbs in the 7 years we've been together. And honestly I never thought "I have him now, I can just let myself go". I started eating differently with him, bigger meals. I started to eat as much as he did. He had 5 pieces of pizza i did too. I also have some medical things that caused it but that can't be my excuse.

    I'm losing weight for myself but also for my family. I want him to be proud that I am his wife. He tells me I'm beautiful but I know he'd like it if I was healthier.
    I too like you, want to be healthy for mysel but also for my family.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    AND HER COOKING STINKS TOO!!!!
  • fakeplastictree
    fakeplastictree Posts: 836 Member
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    My wife is fat.
  • ElyseL1
    ElyseL1 Posts: 504 Member
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    My wife and I both lost weight since we got married in Jan 2011. She lost 50 lbs and I lost a little over 40 lbs so far. Our motivation to live a healthier lifestyle is based on wanting to teach our future children how to live healthy (IMO the best way to teach a kid anything is to lead by example), and to live a long life. We also enjoy being active together.

    I guess my point is getting married doesn't mean you will gain weight.

    Exact same for me and my husband!! We got married in June, and he watched me gain a bunch of weight the three years we were dating bc of taking care of a ill family member. We got married and I was like enough is enough i've got to lose the weight, I need to before we have kids. He offered to do it with me. So far i've lost 23 lbs and he's lost 30 something. Life is good. :)
  • Mellie289
    Mellie289 Posts: 1,191 Member
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    I gained weight after I got married, but so did my husband. It had to do with our lifestyles at the time that involved lots of high fat foods, sedentary jobs with long commutes and little opportunity to move around. I lost it after we divorced (new job, more time to exercise), got a boyfriend and started gaining again, although I was NOT letting myself go - the second time it was because of thyroid issue that went undiagnosed for too long despite a few visits to the doctor complaining about my fatigue. The boyfriend also got a bit of tummy over the course of our year and a half relationship. Neither one of them cared about my weight gain as far as I knew.

    I don't understand your friend's comment about needing to become out of shape to find a man to marry. That makes no sense to me at all. I think many married people gain weight simply because of the circumstances of their life, especially for women who have children. It's not a conscious decision. I find the idea of married women being fat "and nasty" kind of insulting to married women too. Your friend should work on her personality to find a man to marry.
  • mikeyboy
    mikeyboy Posts: 1,057 Member
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    My wife is on here. Both of us have no problem talking about weight or fitness. She is 5'3" and weighed 102 lbs when we met. She now is at 138. Her goal weight is now 125. She is aways smoking in my book!
  • Army_Love89
    Army_Love89 Posts: 30
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    I put on weight during my husbands deployments overseas(Iraq). Just stress eating, horrible sleep schedule, didn't want to miss his call so stayed near my phone. He's been deployed 3 times and each time he comes back I'll lose some weight....I wouldn't care if my husband commented because he finds me beautiful & tells me several times a day however he wants me healthy & is working out with me, eating clean & motivating me! I was super fit before we got married as well but he has a super fast metabolism & can eat whatever he wants so when we got married I was "happy" and if he wanted ice cream I ate ice cream, pizza night whatever I ate what he ate and i'm not proud of that but it's the truth! He would say yes my wife is overweight however we are working out together and getting in shape together. I love him more then anything & he's never made me feel ugly he just hates how I feel about myself. WIth my weight gain we also put off trying to have a baby because he told me it'd be healthier for you & our future baby & he wants me to have a speedy recovery & not hate my post baby body so much.
  • sevsmom
    sevsmom Posts: 1,172 Member
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    I met my 2nd husband on the tail end of my year long "divorce diet". . .NOT recommended. I was waifishly thin and unhealthy because I was depressed and distraught over my first marriage ending.

    I sure did gain weight. Got healthy. Then got unhealthy in the other direction after our son (our 5th child in total) was born and some ridiculous stress at work for about 2 years. He loved me then. He loves me now. He NEVER said one single negative word about my weight even when I complained about it. He told me I was beautiful at every benchmark on the scale.

    I began losing weight about a year and half ago and he joined me 8 months ago. We're both down over 30lbs each and feeling much better physically. But, our love is stronger only because we grow in our love for each other with each passing day, not the declining # on the scale!

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