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Men are terrified of women

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  • Posts: 1,031 Member
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    Shoot... take the trash out or do any other chore in the house without me asking..see how fast these panties drop.

    Instant turn on
    FML.. I need you to talk with my wife.. get her on board with that! I effin cook, clean, do laundry, and still she holds the kitty for ransom like a middle eastern terrorist
  • Posts: 1,752 Member
    or the dog will get it...

    LOL... lost it on that one!!!!
  • Posts: 1,792 Member
    being real here...

    other than for the upper mustache area, women's razors are VASTLY more comfortable than men's razors I've shaved with. I've not tried everything, but I've tried a lot.

    Nothing beats my wife's venus....
  • Posts: 77 Member
    I'm always amazed no matter if its a twin bed or a king bed I still only get about 12 inches of room. I know you like to cuddle but you're asleep now and I'm hot. Get off me and get on your side of the bed.
  • Posts: 1,031 Member
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    My awesome razor was not meant for male ball hair! Don't you guys have special reinforced razors for that *kitten*!?
    whatever.. I catch my wife using my razor on her cooch all the time... I go to shave and I am like WTF does y razor smell like cooch? same wiht my beard trimme rin the winter.. LOL
  • Posts: 1,752 Member
    and I'll pick my socks up off the floor and put them in the hamper...when I'm DAMN good and ready.... and I'm ready right now honey.....
  • Posts: 1,792 Member
    I'm always amazed no matter if its a twin bed or a king bed I still only get about 12 inches of room. I know you like to cuddle but you're asleep now and I'm hot. Get off me and get on your side of the bed.

    that's when you do the win/win of turning spooning into sporking.
  • Posts: 6,294 Member
    Who REALLY has decorative towels in the bathroom?
  • Posts: 452 Member
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    whatever.. I catch my wife using my razor on her cooch all the time... I go to shave and I am like WTF does y razor smell like cooch? same wiht my beard trimme rin the winter.. LOL

    She's probably using it because you've left your nasty man ball hair all over hers.
  • Posts: 926 Member
    I'm always amazed no matter if its a twin bed or a king bed I still only get about 12 inches of room. I know you like to cuddle but you're asleep now and I'm hot. Get off me and get on your side of the bed.

    MARRY ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Oh wait.. im already married :wink:
  • Posts: 926 Member
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    FML.. I need you to talk with my wife.. get her on board with that! I effin cook, clean, do laundry, and still she holds the kitty for ransom like a middle eastern terrorist

    DAMN!!!!!!!!!!! Do that crap in my house, you'd be getting kitty whenever you wanted. Last time i came home and my husband had cleaned, dished, laundry, trash...all of that, i literally put my bag down and said "you..bedroom! NOW!"
  • Posts: 77
    Men should be scared... mwhaha

    love it
  • Posts: 2,394 Member
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    DAMN!!!!!!!!!!! Do that crap in my house, you'd be getting kitty whenever you wanted. Last time i came home and my husband had cleaned, dished, laundry, trash...all of that, i literally put my bag down and said "you..bedroom! NOW!"

    I am clearly house-husbanding in the wrong house.
  • Posts: 4,564 Member
    * look in pants to make sure I am still a girl.....yep still have girly parts *

    I don't give a damn about the towels, decorative soap is a waste, I really can lower the toilet seat all by myself.

    I am weird
  • Posts: 6,294 Member
    If the toilet lid doesn't stay down the dogs and/or children get into the water....
  • Posts: 1,031 Member
    show previous quotes

    DAMN!!!!!!!!!!! Do that crap in my house, you'd be getting kitty whenever you wanted. Last time i came home and my husband had cleaned, dished, laundry, trash...all of that, i literally put my bag down and said "you..bedroom! NOW!"
    Thats BS MAN!!!!! I would stop doing all my "chores" but I am afraid the kitty would come out to play even lesss. I think I effed up early in our marriage when i told her it was the best I ever had and would do anything for it... that was just foreplay talk... she took that **** to heart!!!! lol
  • Posts: 1,792 Member
    oh my wife gets PISSED if the lid is down...that's worse than the seat being up...
  • Posts: 6,420 Member
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    FML.. I need you to talk with my wife.. get her on board with that! I effin cook, clean, do laundry, and still she holds the kitty for ransom like a middle eastern terrorist

    HAHAHA

    (and this laugh was for realsies)
  • Posts: 1,351 Member
    LOL!!! in my home. i have cute soaps, pretty candles, decorative towels in the bathrooms and at the kitchen sink...and i think, if it smells good , or looks good then it darned well better be USEFUL or else its chucked out!! i dont have place for mindless, pretty clutter that collects dust.

    Why keep soap and towels in the bathroom if they arent meant to be used. Durr...
  • Posts: 702 Member
    ROFL!!
  • Posts: 935 Member
    My husband only left the toliet seat up once! I fell in during the middle of the night and woke him up with a big glass of water. I figured I had gotten wet so he'd get wet (I used clean water!!). He never did it again lol.
  • Posts: 2,094 Member
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    Shoot... take the trash out or do any other chore in the house without me asking..see how fast these panties drop.

    Instant turn on

    Duely noted for future reference on my wooing techniques.....LOL!!!
  • Posts: 661 Member
    After my sister went to college and my mom left it was just my dad and I. I got a cold shock a couple of times after sitting on the lip of the toilet at odd hours of the night. Thankfully I never fell in (thank you God for giving me wide hips)! So to cope I formed the habit of closing the lid of the toilet after every use. Now I check every time (even though I now own a house and it is only me and my female renter living there) and I haven't had a problem since. Though when I go to other people's houses they might wonder why the lid is down later. :p And their roll of TP has been corrected to over not under.

    As for being afraid of women.. Man up. Women like strong men, if you can't stand up to us (while still being respectful of course) then you won't earn our respect. If there isn't mutual respect in a relationship then you just have two *kitten* strapped to the same cart pulling in different directions. We aren't going to let you lead in peace if we don't trust you to look out for our interests too.
  • Posts: 772 Member
    For a minute there i thought i was the only one who puts the lid down.
    Do people not know that when you flush, small molecules of water go up in the air?
  • Posts: 13 Member
    Growing up the eldest and only male child of 5, I was constantly nagged about the toilet seat. My response was "You're a big girl, learn to work the seat." (Note: response said to my sisters only. To Mom, it was Yes Ma'am, then I'd conveniently forget.)

    After 4 grandsons and 2 great grandsons, Mon's given up. :laugh:
  • Posts: 77
    show previous quotes

    Duely noted for future reference on my wooing techniques.....LOL!!!

    im sure loads of the ladies here give you practice!!! LOL
  • Posts: 6,025 Member
    For a minute there i thought i was the only one who puts the lid down.
    Do people not know that when you flush, small molecules of water go up in the air?


    Poop particles!!! I do not want them on my toothbrush!!
  • Posts: 371 Member
    *snort* still waiting..
  • Posts: 385 Member
    and I'll pick my socks up off the floor and put them in the hamper...when I'm DAMN good and ready.... and I'm ready right now honey.....

    *CACKLE!*
  • Posts: 257 Member
    Chores or no Chores, Toilet Seat up or down, Use the decorative Towel don't use the Decorative towel.....regardless of what it is I am scared Sh**less of Women....
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