Single at 33..why?

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  • georgie181
    georgie181 Posts: 68
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    My mum always says when your not looking the right 1 will come along, all the time your searching for it, it won't happen. just have fun and enjoy your life and the rest will fall into place :D
  • embersfallen
    embersfallen Posts: 534 Member
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    Feelin' your pain dearies.......I am 38...and a long distance relationship I had many dreams for... 3.5 years....ended with a final thud last eve. This was the man I thought was my soulmate..the only man I have ever loved in fact. Fun times. :sick: ....funny...he's a musician too.. always something I have been attracted to.... *sigh*... they must be hiding out there for us....stay strong...and know you are worth someone who will treasure your heart, not shatter it.... I need someone creative, goofy, and who is a strong christian...but not close minded either to things outside the christian realm of people and music...a musician of some sort or at least REALLY into it because it's one of my passions.........so it's not easy...because that limits things even more! ha.... so i do TOTALLY understand... and I have 5 years on you! :huh: Getting old while single sucks....

    People say if something is not meant to be, the thing that is is even better...well then..... God must have one pretty incredible guy out there for me!!!! And for you too... never let your heart close... love may surpise you when you least expect it!
  • Serenstar75
    Serenstar75 Posts: 258 Member
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    I'm in the process of divorce and you have me discouraged. Are there really no good ones left, darn!

    Never be discouraged. I felt a failure, two marriages and single at 35. Now I'm 37 and couldn't be happier. I have found that there is no limit to when you can find someone wonderful.
  • penniemh
    penniemh Posts: 124 Member
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    advice that is practical?

    stop looking and enjoy your life

    dont focus on age and numbers and types. It all means little to nothing.

    I like this reply.
  • hiker359
    hiker359 Posts: 577 Member
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    I just turned 30 a month ago having never been tied down. I've learned that enjoying life as it is is so much more satisfying than pining after how you think it should be. So you haven't found somebody to share your life with. Your value is not determined by whether you check married or single on your tax return.

    There are still good ones left, though I will admit they're fewer and farther between, but we're out there.

    And above all, remember, "It's better to be single and happy than married and miserable."
  • fitforlife34
    fitforlife34 Posts: 331 Member
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    One good thing is that I have dated A LOT of men since my 20's. So I know what i want and don't want. A few guys I dated were excellent men, but didn't marry them. My last one in 2006 was horrible, stole money, used me etc. My recent boyfirend of a year is married with kids, and has been close to separating, but I couldn't wait around. This guy I"m sorta dating is 13 years my senior with 5 kids, one a year younger with me.

    And yes, I am of the LDS religion, although not hardcore at all. In my culture if you are not married by 25 something is wrong with you. When I lived in Utah I thought I was going bonkers, because peole there, if they don't have a date every weekend or not engaged cry for days. Lamo.
  • shelbyj72
    shelbyj72 Posts: 184 Member
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    Sometimes you wonder how you could be single and unmarried at 33. It's really depressing, bec I know I am a good perosn, but I can't seem to find a good man. I date the musican types, and they have proven to not make good boyfriends. And my man wants me to meet a good Christian/BA Degree/smart/good job etc. and I told her most of them are married by my age. And all the good men are taken.

    Sucks becuase everyone my age in the church are all married with kids. I feel like there's something majorly wrong with me. Any thoughts/comments/suggestions?


    Girl try single at 40 no kids no boyfriend nothing. What I have learned is that once you embrace being single and learn to be happy with or without someone things will change. The best thing to do at this point is to stay focused on your goals and continue to build your relationship with God. Just know that being single is a good thing it gives you more time to figure things out and room to improve so that you can be the best wife you can be. I do know myself that I have come a long way had I been married early I may have been divorced. God does things at His own timing. Be encouraged your situation can change at anytime you just have to make the decision to make the change.
  • shelbyj72
    shelbyj72 Posts: 184 Member
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    EMBRACE IT!!!!!!!!!


    Love it!
  • shelbyj72
    shelbyj72 Posts: 184 Member
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    I've been divorced for 7 years and I have a wonderful 9 year old as a result. I would love to meet the right guy and get married again, but it has not happened ...yet, but I have faith that he is out there somewhere and I will meet him when the time is right!

    I think the key is to stay focused on your purpose here and have faith! Also, remain open-minded and do not let other people (i.e. society, church friends, etc). dictate to you how your life is supposed to progress. There is no "right" formula for life. Just prepare to be surprised and try to enjoy the ride :-)

    Amen!
  • hteejay
    hteejay Posts: 53 Member
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    Yes... Love it.. gotta embrace what you are.. nothing wrong with trully finding the right one.. And since divorce rates so hi,, if you would of waited, could of found the right one instead of rushing ... Im just saying!!
  • anacsitham5
    anacsitham5 Posts: 814 Member
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    Wait. One day, he will be there and you will be glad you waited for him and didn't "settle" for someone else along the way. It will happen. :smile:
  • fitforlife34
    fitforlife34 Posts: 331 Member
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    Sometimes you wonder how you could be single and unmarried at 33. It's really depressing, bec I know I am a good perosn, but I can't seem to find a good man. I date the musican types, and they have proven to not make good boyfriends. And my man wants me to meet a good Christian/BA Degree/smart/good job etc. and I told her most of them are married by my age. And all the good men are taken.

    Sucks becuase everyone my age in the church are all married with kids. I feel like there's something majorly wrong with me. Any thoughts/comments/suggestions?

    I can't tell you how many women I've met that say, "I wont date musicians". Of course, that's after I say I'm a musician. LOL. Screw 'em. I'm not here to score points. They gotta dig me for who I am. I aint changing nothing for no one.


    sorry...im a musicisn too thats why i feel drawn to those with talents like mine. what i meant was peoples who expect to be rich as musician
    but have no money to tske a girl on a date. mainly talking about R A P P E R S 77!
  • CassandraM22
    CassandraM22 Posts: 89
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    I'm single at 32. I figure it's because 1. I'm not happy with myself at the moment, and 2. I havent found anyone that I click with on a level that makes me want to spend the rest of my life looking at them on the other side of the table.

    I figure it will happen when I'm ready mentally. I don't believe there is a "THE ONE" out there even though I read romance novels like they are going out of style. I figure once I see myself on the outside the way I feel on the inside...things will click better for me. I'll stop second guessing myself or sabotaging any potential relationship that comes my way. I know I will always be a little insecure it comes hand in hand with being a big girl, but...one day I'll find someone that I don't mind sharing the remote with. :)
  • happilyeveractive
    happilyeveractive Posts: 167 Member
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    I'm 25. In a 4 year relationship and no where near being engaged. We can't afford it...or more so my bf can't. Every single one of my friends seems to have been in a 1 year relationship and then engaged. The place I have dreamed of getting married (also where I met my bf and where he is from) has already been taken. It drives me bonkers because I'm the only one of my friends who has their master's, has been working full time since college (and in fact since I was 14), who pays for all their bills (new car, apartment, general living) and has it together. Just really depressing.....
  • mhide
    mhide Posts: 20
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    Sucks becuase everyone my age in the church are all married with kids. I feel like there's something majorly wrong with me. Any thoughts/comments/suggestions?

    Something similar is happening to me (I'm 33 too). A month ago my mom suggested to date someone from the neighborhood and my answer was: who should I date?, women my age are all married and have at least 2-3 children, girls in their 20's are single mothers mostly and don't have time for dating or just got married, girls below 20 I don't want to go to jail.

    I'm not sure if this is the right answer but, have you tried to meet someone not from the church? maybe work, school, gym and so. Also you could get involved in some extra activities that might allow you to meet different people.

    Have a great day!!
  • Charmed285
    Charmed285 Posts: 189 Member
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    Anytime you're feeling down about being single, go to this website. You will instantly feel better.

    http://myfriendsaremarried.tumblr.com/


    Umm... hello my favorite website of the day.

    Agreed! I LMAO
  • jfrankic
    jfrankic Posts: 747 Member
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    I go to a church that the main demographic is 20s and 30s. It is a very young, fun, active group. There are about 600 adults, so the pickin' would be perfect. Lots of single, wonderful people. You shouldn't change churches just to meet a boy, but maybe a church with a congregation more of your age would be good, if you aren't already in a church like that. Yes, my church has alot of families, but alot of singles in both sex. I'm sure God has your perfect match, in his perfect time.
  • fionarama
    fionarama Posts: 788 Member
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    33 is still pretty young! Wish I was 33 (I'm 44!).
    I was single at 33. Stayed that way to 38 when FINALLY I went to a singles type party and met my husband. He is completely different from anyone I have dated before (a country boy who just wants to be married). So my advice is go that way, go to dating type places, there are pitfalls but at least the people you meet you can make it clear you want a committed relationship and if they are going to singles parties they are more than likely after the same thing. Many guys ONLY play music just to score chicks, its a given that that type of guy although glamorous on some levels is probably not going to commit.
    Many men don't want to settle down to their mid to late 30's but unfortunately they still want a younger woman. I met who I thought thought was a perfect match for me at 37, he was the same age as me but he thought I was too old for him. I was angry at that but unfortunately his partner after me had 3 children with him in 3 years. At 37 I would never have been up for that!!!
    Don't give up and enjoy having your own life, my regret is that when I was single I spent far too much time being down about it when I should have just focused on being selfish with my workouts and taken advantage of all the time on my hands.
  • HartJames
    HartJames Posts: 789 Member
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    You are one of the lucky ones! You get to have all this extra time to find YOURself, without a relationship interfering or hindering your growth. You get to be selfish, work on just YOU and create your own happiness. You get the time to figure out what you really want in a partner, what you don't want and most importantly what you NEED. It's better all around, can all these ladies saying so be wrong?

    My husband and met when I was almost 31. Two actual adults who have lived and experienced enough to really appreciate what we have found in each other. Older, wiser, happier and more satisfied with ourselves and lives in general = a stable, solid, amazing relationship.
  • Hadley_SM
    Hadley_SM Posts: 43 Member
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    bump

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