Cheated on, and got through it?

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verysadpanda
verysadpanda Posts: 6
in Chit-Chat
Just looking to hear what other people have gone through on this.

Have you ever been cheated on, and the relationship lasted? Could you trust them again, and be happy with them again? Please share your story...
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Replies

  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
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    I've been cheated on a few times.

    In my mind that is one of the things you can do to me that is not fixable. If you cheat on me, we are done.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Cheating is not something easily forgotten by anybody, I think.

    But if you make the choice to forgive someone, you have to forgive them completely. You can't forgive when it's convenient for you and then when they don't answer their phone because they're in the bathroom... "You're cheating on me again, aren't you!?!?"

    I think with a lot of therapy and transparency by the other person, it can be "fixed" But for me, it's a deal breaker.
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,323 Member
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    nah....it didnt last. turned out she was a *kitten*.
    so i left.
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Oh. You're a fruit loop.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/754503-people-are-disposable
  • TylerJ76
    TylerJ76 Posts: 4,375 Member
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    Oh. You're a fruit loop.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/754503-people-are-disposable

    :laugh: :laugh:
  • verysadpanda
    verysadpanda Posts: 6
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    Thanks a lot corn63. Believe it or not, I'm a person with real feelings and I've been badly hurt. But no, I'm not a fruit loop or a troll. Keep moving....
  • VelociMama
    VelociMama Posts: 3,119 Member
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    Yes, and I dumped him right then and there for good. It sucked, and I was pretty messed up about men and relationship for a while afterwards, but I got over it and married an amazing man much later. I don't even remember that much about Mr. cheater anymore. He never really occupies my thoughts anymore.
  • LesleeBeAlive
    LesleeBeAlive Posts: 504
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    Oh. You're a fruit loop.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/754503-people-are-disposable

    :noway: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Hearts_2015
    Hearts_2015 Posts: 12,031 Member
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    I've been cheated on a few times.

    In my mind that is one of the things you can do to me that is not fixable. If you cheat on me, we are done.
    Same works for me, that's not something I can let slide, ppl may change but how do you know they truly have? If the first cheat was a surprise and aren't they always! Why decide they won't step out again... that's a deal breaker for myself as well.

    Some earlier shared you need to learn to trust again, but I think the other person has a lot more to work on. They have to prove themselves trustworthy and how exactly do they do that after an affair. How long do you wait, nah... not worth it too me.

    Some do go on and recover but not sure I even understand how they would, some ppl are serial cheaters. Though even one time breaks the trust in a relationship because it's a pretty big break of trust!
  • corn63
    corn63 Posts: 1,580 Member
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    Thanks a lot corn63. Believe it or not, I'm a person with real feelings and I've been badly hurt. But no, I'm not a fruit loop or a troll. Keep moving....

    Look. People suck. People do stupid things. People do mean things. People do things for no reason. The only thing you can control is your response to them. You can choose to allow them to run your life with their reckless abandon OR you can charge them to the game and move on.

    Seriously, good luck. Life is tough enough without asshats, but y'know. They're everywhere.
  • skullshank
    skullshank Posts: 4,323 Member
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    Oh. You're a fruit loop.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/754503-people-are-disposable

    ohhhhh NOW this is a thread!
  • ShmoozyQ
    ShmoozyQ Posts: 390 Member
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    Nope, I couldn't get past it. The fact that he kept doing it sure didn't help matters any!
  • kelseyhere
    kelseyhere Posts: 1,123 Member
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    yeah. people *kitten* up. if you can forgive them, it can work. but you have to start trusting again. if you still don't trust them, it's never going to work.
  • MinnieInMaine
    MinnieInMaine Posts: 6,400 Member
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    Cheating is not something easily forgotten by anybody, I think.

    But if you make the choice to forgive someone, you have to forgive them completely. You can't forgive when it's convenient for you and then when they don't answer their phone because they're in the bathroom... "You're cheating on me again, aren't you!?!?"

    I think with a lot of therapy and transparency by the other person, it can be "fixed" But for me, it's a deal breaker.

    That's exactly how I feel. IMHO, cheating is a huge betrayal of trust. Here you are thinking he loves you as much as he says and is going to be faithful to you like he promised in your vows and BLAMMO, you find out it was all lies. Personally, I couldn't get past something like that. BUT I've known other couples who have and more power to them. If you can truly forgive and rebuild the trust, more power to you.
  • MrDude_1
    MrDude_1 Posts: 2,510 Member
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    Oh. You're a fruit loop.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/754503-people-are-disposable
    link TL;DR.

    I concur anyway.
  • CarlyRobbinsGilbert
    CarlyRobbinsGilbert Posts: 64
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    We went to some therapy. We still don't fully trust each other, but it gets a tiny bit better each day. I was able to understand and forgive because I have been the cheater in the past.
  • Bonnyr1971
    Bonnyr1971 Posts: 51
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    Once they cheat the trust is gone, I can not forgive that.
  • ILoveTheBrowns
    ILoveTheBrowns Posts: 661 Member
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    i think i may have just came up with a genious business idea.....myrelationshippal.com
  • Christylee76
    Christylee76 Posts: 138 Member
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    My husband has cheated on me so many times when we were first married. Alot of people would have walked away,however I believe that marriage is till death do us part. I have cheated myself and we have been through so much..ex:death of a child..We acutally divorced and remarried and now our marriage is almost picture perfect. I do feel as if people can change if for one, they want to and two, you have to be willing to let the past go. Now, would I go through it again, heck no! But again like I said, it has made us stronger and more in love than ever...We were married very young, I was 17 him 21.. I take it since you created this post you must be facing a cheating issue. I feel your pain and wish you the best.....however, please know, I am living proof, you can survive just about anything:)
  • felice03
    felice03 Posts: 2,732 Member
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    Oh. You're a fruit loop.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/754503-people-are-disposable
    link TL;DR.

    I concur anyway.

    i think we all concur.

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