Upset people because you DONT drink alcohol

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Replies

  • blakejohn
    blakejohn Posts: 1,129 Member
    Just to respond to some comments on here:

    I was at a restaurant/sports bar to watch the Bucs game, not at a club and there was no dance floor. It was a restaurant with a bar, just like Bennigan's.
    I was with a group of friends and people I just met, my friends didnt comment on my soda because they know I drink alcohol, it was the new people who inquired as soon as I said 'diet coke please'.
    I do drink socially.
    I have never thought myself to comment on whether someone drinks alcohol or not so I'm wondering why other people do.
    I have noticed that it is the people who drink to excess that tend to comment.
    I am 45 and the commenters are all ages so how old does one have to be before it stops?

    well to get through a bucs game don't you need a few drinks :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
  • Sharon009
    Sharon009 Posts: 327 Member
    Just to respond to some comments on here:

    I was at a restaurant/sports bar to watch the Bucs game, not at a club and there was no dance floor. It was a restaurant with a bar, just like Bennigan's.
    I was with a group of friends and people I just met, my friends didnt comment on my soda because they know I drink alcohol, it was the new people who inquired as soon as I said 'diet coke please'.
    I do drink socially.
    I have never thought myself to comment on whether someone drinks alcohol or not so I'm wondering why other people do.
    I have noticed that it is the people who drink to excess that tend to comment.
    I am 45 and the commenters are all ages so how old does one have to be before it stops?



    well to get through a bucs game don't you need a few drinks :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


    LOL!! That is true but thank goodness they won that time! It was a good game
  • uglydeuce
    uglydeuce Posts: 35 Member
    Wow ok. Wow. I love how everyone on here who DOESN'T drink is saying "Oh, it's because they don't have self control and feel bad about themselves" or some other slightly insulting comment toward the drinkers. Having been both the drinker and the one not drinking, there's usually an obvious disparity between those drinking and those not. The sober person often seems uncomfortable or annoyed or even left out, and that makes the whole group a little uncomfortable and can put a bad tone on a good night. It has nothing to do with being judged for my lack of self-control; I certainly don't feel guilty or worthless for tipping a few back. I just don't like getting eyes rolled at me if I laugh a little too long at something. Sorry that I'm having fun.

    Reasons why I may ask someone if they're sure they don't want a drink:
    -Money can be tight in my friend group, and I'll pick up a drink or two for my friend if they actually want it
    -If there's a specific reason why they're not drinking, they may want to talk about it but aren't sure how to bring it up (medical issue, etc.)
    -They've obviously had a stressful day - one drink won't ruin a diet, but it will help you calm down a little

    That said, if they've stated they're fine with soda or they're not drinking for whatever reasons, I don't pressure them. I certainly leave people who flat out don't drink alone. On nights where I choose not to drink, I find the pressure coming from people who just want to make sure I'm having a good time, like the host of the party or a friend who knows I've had a bad week. It's easy to deflect. Offering someone a drink and hoping they accept is similar to offering someone a homemade cupcake - you want to share an experience with them and want them to enjoy themselves.

    ^^^ This!

    I've been pressured but its never because of "peer pressure" its always people wanting me to have a good time with them. My girlfriend is one of those people and its because it makes her body feel good and she really feels content and happy when she drinks. I'm not usually a drinker to begin with because I'm usually never in the mind frame where I won't annoy myself. Not to mention I only every feel it when I drink a LOT until I'm wasted. But I never take it personal - just people wanting me to have fun not realizing that I'm having fun in my own little world.
  • blakejohn
    blakejohn Posts: 1,129 Member
    Just to respond to some comments on here:

    I was at a restaurant/sports bar to watch the Bucs game, not at a club and there was no dance floor. It was a restaurant with a bar, just like Bennigan's.
    I was with a group of friends and people I just met, my friends didnt comment on my soda because they know I drink alcohol, it was the new people who inquired as soon as I said 'diet coke please'.
    I do drink socially.
    I have never thought myself to comment on whether someone drinks alcohol or not so I'm wondering why other people do.
    I have noticed that it is the people who drink to excess that tend to comment.
    I am 45 and the commenters are all ages so how old does one have to be before it stops?



    well to get through a bucs game don't you need a few drinks :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


    LOL!! That is true but thank goodness they won that time! It was a good game

    I'm an Eagles fan, so I've been living with Agita since week one
  • carlee1212
    carlee1212 Posts: 33 Member
    I think you will rarely find someone who is offended that you don't drink that doesn't have a drinking problem themselves. It really nothing to do with that you aren't drinking, and has a LOT to do with the fact that they can't stop.
  • foxro
    foxro Posts: 793 Member
    This is a great post that deserves summary. Interesting the gap between drinkers and non-drinkers. Right down to judging and name calling. So who is right ????? Most of you display some form of intolerance to drinking or not drinking. Is it any wonder the author of this post is upset. Lines are drawn, the drinkers are labelled, and the non-drinkers are labelled, so what prevails ?

    Remember folks...we are in a culture that holds freedoms in high regard...I really didn't see those freedoms respected in this post.

    At one time smokers were considered OK...now they are considered losers, trash or evil...WTF happened ????
  • midschool22
    midschool22 Posts: 1,267 Member
    Most, if not all the people I meet are cool to me about not drinking. And if they were not, I would EFF with them until they got the point, I DON'T DRINK.
  • jamesbeckmann
    jamesbeckmann Posts: 4 Member
    When I started getting into health and fitness last march, it took me a while to realize a few different things.

    1) I have little to no will power in certain environments.
    2) The friends I used to drink with would get upset because I was bettering myself while they weren't changing.
    3) It was time to move on and find new friends with shared interest.

    My best friend always says, "It's hard to soar like an eagle, when you fly around with dodo's"
  • gmctech
    gmctech Posts: 104 Member
    Seriously? People make snide remarks about you not drinking? This one takes the cake... I drink and have friends that don't drink just because they don't like it or just don't want to and other friends that are recovering alcoholics and are sober... I would never think it odd that someone passes on a drink of alcohol and sure as heck would never make any mean remarks about their decision... This is honestly a new one for me.. Even though I do enjoy alcohol, I do pass on it from time to time and have never encountered this...
  • ShellBwell
    ShellBwell Posts: 2 Member
    I have never been a drinker and I have gotten comments as well, it kind of makes me laugh but always surprised me as well,I never "GOT" why people would care one way or another. I always used to say....I don't need any alcohol to make me have a fun time, and in fact...if anything, it will lower my energy and fun - I think some people feel they need it to loosen up and have fun and they want you to as well.

    Just remember, It is about them and their issues and insecurities, not about you at all. I fall back on my favorite quote.... Be who you are, those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter.
  • foxro
    foxro Posts: 793 Member
    So because your friends are not perfect they become dodos. Guess you really were not their friend to begin with.