Why women don't date fat guys?

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  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    Maybe because fat guys aren't confident enough to ask thin girls out?

    Spoken from a girl who has a huge crush on an overweight dude that's going nowhere -.- It's all about the chemistry, which, for me, isn't looks based (you could tell that if you saw my last bf-HA)
  • JustANumber85
    JustANumber85 Posts: 644 Member
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    My sons father is and was HEAVILY obese and I dated him 2x and we have a child together. His weight had nothing to do with liking him or not. In fact, as I later found out...we would of never worked not because of his weight but because of his d1ckish ways.

    By obese Im saying hes pushing 400+.
  • Jennaissance
    Jennaissance Posts: 212
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    Before I found the man I married, I dated tons of guys with totally different body types. I guess what always attracted me was more what was in the package than the package itself. That said, if you aren't confident about the package and you don't think it speaks for itself than you gotta stand up, move in and tell the story that your outward appearance might not tell about you.

    I know from experience that it's hard to be confident sometimes. So many people want to decide what you are like based on how you look. Pipe up and don't let your appearance do all the talking for you. In the process, you just might start to like your appearance.

    To me, my husband was "that extremely short skinny man that looks like a girl" (totally not my type) until he talked to me!
  • trophywife24
    trophywife24 Posts: 1,472 Member
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    I like chubby guys. My husband is 20-30 pounds overweight, has a baby face and is dead. freaking. sexy. That's just my "type", I like tall, broad, stocky guys with baby faces.

    If I were to date again...................... that's the type I'd still date. I can't really comment on obese men or dating someone that's very fat. I wouldn't, for both their health and my own sexual attraction. There's someone for everyone, though.
  • SpanksNotSpanx
    SpanksNotSpanx Posts: 31 Member
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    I've dated fat guys and skinny guys and muscular beefy guys and it's all the same:

    1) I like confidence. If you aren't confident... then PRETEND until you are confident. If you think that no one is going to date you because you're fat ... you're probably right. Not because you're fat, but because you don't hold yourself with high enough regard.

    2) I like humility and empathy. If you're too picky in your partner, and can't accept them for their flaws and relate to them on a personal level, how will they ever accept you for your moobs and bad attitude?

    3)There has to be chemistry. If you connect on an emotional level, then physical bonds come much easier even for a person that is not as attracted to a bigger partner.

    4)Have to be able to keep up with me. I'm not asking to be surpassed, but I want a partner who can match my needs or is at least willing to TRY. There are a lot of stereotypes about bigger folks not being able to compete...

    So buck up, change your attitude... from "I'd be lucky to date them" to "They would be lucky to have a guy like me" and make some changes to improve your own life ;)
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
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    To me, my husband was "that extremely short skinny man that looks like a girl" (totally not my type) until he talked to me!

    That's how I felt about my first boyfriend. I thought he looked gay. Skinny with no muscle, huge nose...But he was such a sweetheart once I got to know him. And I ended up being totally attracted to him.
  • Cespuglio
    Cespuglio Posts: 385 Member
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    Here's an answer that has nothing to do with the body below the neck: A lot of the time I'm not into an obese man only because I find that the extra weight on their faces tends to obscure their features. I'm a face girl. It doesn't matter to me how fit you are if your face isn't doing it for me. That being said, I have happily dated a few chunky guys because they had faces that I found quite handsome.
  • Sassy922
    Sassy922 Posts: 399 Member
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    Really give me an answer an someway to change this? that don;t have to do with losing weight

    the only way to change this is to change societal views on obesity. Good luck with that.
  • Jennaissance
    Jennaissance Posts: 212
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    To me, my husband was "that extremely short skinny man that looks like a girl" (totally not my type) until he talked to me!

    That's how I felt about my first boyfriend. I thought he looked gay. Skinny with no muscle, huge nose...But he was such a sweetheart once I got to know him. And I ended up being totally attracted to him.

    I know. I go for big and tall every time but that didn't prevent me from noticing that my (future) husband was the most awesome sweetheart with all the right words. Now he's the one.
  • WDEvy
    WDEvy Posts: 814 Member
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    I do.... I don't mean morbidly obese but I would never ever date a skinny guy.
  • bushidowoman
    bushidowoman Posts: 1,599 Member
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    When I was single, I dated plenty of guys who might be considered "fat". It wasn't an issue when I was young (I didn't workout back then, either.) I dated guys who were intelligent, witty, liked to have fun, and treated me with respect.

    But in all honesty, now at my age, if I weren't married, health would be more important to me. At almost 40, I am very active and like to GO. I like to dance, hike, bike, climb hills, and I have a healthy libido. I appreciate that my hubby, who is 46, is in pretty good shape--no health issues, no prescriptions, and he can keep up with me. :wink:
  • Foxxy18
    Foxxy18 Posts: 119 Member
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    I wouldn't date an obese guy (if he was actively trying to lose weight; I might consider), but I've always been attracted to chubby/stocky guys. I don't typically like "skinny" guys, but that may be because they're outside of my comfort-zone since I'm overweight.
  • earthtoamy
    earthtoamy Posts: 1
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    I'm about 115lbs and boyfriend is at least 300. I love fat guys! :D
  • cmcollins001
    cmcollins001 Posts: 3,472 Member
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    Really give me an answer an someway to change this? that don;t have to do with losing weight

    Ask a girl out.

    Have confidence.

    Like yourself so they can too.

    Make them smile and laugh.

    Have confidence in yourself.

    Ask a girl out.

    Be creative.

    Don't throw yourself pity parties when you get turned down. Go find another girl to ask out.

    Flirt.

    And finally, ask a girl out.
  • Foxxy18
    Foxxy18 Posts: 119 Member
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    some girls like fat boys bc theyre fun 2 hug n feel like a big fluffy yummy marshmallow.. yayyy!!!!

    ^^ This is why I like chubby guys! It sounds bad, but they're so huggable!(:
  • TXBelle1174
    TXBelle1174 Posts: 615 Member
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    Really give me an answer an someway to change this? that don;t have to do with losing weight

    Ask a girl out.

    Have confidence.

    Like yourself so they can too.

    Make them smile and laugh.

    Have confidence in yourself.

    Ask a girl out.

    Be creative.

    Don't throw yourself pity parties when you get turned down. Go find another girl to ask out.

    Flirt.

    And finally, ask a girl out.

    ^^^ This! I have seen fat guys, even ugly fat guys, with decent looking women because they have confidence in themselves and aren't afraid to say hi. Stand up straight and smile!
  • Jennaissance
    Jennaissance Posts: 212
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    Really give me an answer an someway to change this? that don;t have to do with losing weight

    Ask a girl out.

    Have confidence.

    Like yourself so they can too.

    Make them smile and laugh.

    Have confidence in yourself.

    Ask a girl out.

    Be creative.

    Don't throw yourself pity parties when you get turned down. Go find another girl to ask out.

    Flirt.

    And finally, ask a girl out.

    ^^^ This! I have seen fat guys, even ugly fat guys, with decent looking women because they have confidence in themselves and aren't afraid to say hi. Stand up straight and smile!

    Seriously this. There are plenty of skinny guys that lack self confidence and can't get a date either!
  • leahestey
    leahestey Posts: 124 Member
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    Is chubby fat? I love a man with some padding. I can't stand the hard 6 pack thing. To me that says, he'll be too busy toworkout to spend time with me. Next, it'll be a guy without a DAMN cell phone. That's all my SO does is plays on his cell.
  • Tina2Cats
    Tina2Cats Posts: 493 Member
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    My hubby was obese when we dated. We had a lot in common and he is funny/has a great sense of humor and he's very loving. It's what you are on the inside that counts.

    There are plenty of studs who are just right (figure wise), but they are stuck up, inconsiderate, and not nice people. Not all, but most I have seen or known.
  • Priincess_Natalie
    Priincess_Natalie Posts: 367 Member
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    I've always been thin and I've dated average men to obese men. For me it's all about the personality and confidence. I've dated two very overweight men. Both were highly intelligent, well groomed, funny, good looking and all around fun to be with.

    One was confident (at least outwardly) about his weight. He was realistic about why he was overweight and honest with himself and others. He ate too much. He enjoyed food too much. He was willing to pay the price of being a big man to enjoy his food. He didn't let his size stop him from being the best he could be at everything he did. His size NEVER bothered me and he was the larger of the two men.

    The other man suffered from severe low self-esteem. I felt like I was being punished for his weight problem. He was in denial that it had anything to do with his eating habits and it was his moms fault, genetics, unfair, etc, etc. The I had to hear, I'm too fat to do that...or too fat to do this. I HATED that. The only thing I wanted to say was "if it's limiting you and making YOU unhappy then stop being fat". I wouldn't have meant it about his weight but more his whinniness about it drove me INSANE.

    You can't say women don't date "fat" guys. I did before I got married. My husband isn't skinny but he's not obese either. It wouldn't really matter over-all if he was. If you're having a hard time finding a girl you need to re-evaluate other things about yourself. Weight loss will help with the initial attraction but will not win you a long term meaningful relationship.

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