Do you feel like the weight will cure your "ugliness" ?

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Replies

  • gaylynn35
    gaylynn35 Posts: 854 Member
    I have never felt pretty, even when I was not fat!
  • jrsey86
    jrsey86 Posts: 186 Member
    It takes time to adjust. We're not just shedding pounds, we're shedding old habits, attitudes, and perceptions we've learned throughout our lives. Insecurities are ever-present, but we have to work through them. I know I can tell you this until I am blue in the face and you won't believe me, but you are very pretty. =)

    We all struggle with this. You will get through it, though. Be kind to yourself. :flowerforyou:
  • n0ob
    n0ob Posts: 2,390 Member
    nice title.
  • deja_blu
    deja_blu Posts: 359 Member
    ALL OF YOU GUYS ARE SEXY BEASTS!!! =p
  • gottaTuscany
    gottaTuscany Posts: 40 Member
    I think it takes a lot of inner work to start seeing the person you are and not the person you were. Start by looking in the mirror and no matter how hard it is, give yourself a compliment. Even if it's just once a day...Maybe the next day go for two. Hang in there. You ARE beautiful, but YOU need to recognize it first. :smile:
  • samiatf
    samiatf Posts: 2
    All the time my weight is a major cause for my depression !! I need to loose 25 lb.
  • VeinsAndBones
    VeinsAndBones Posts: 550 Member
    Yes, I keep losing weight, and instead of being content I find I criticize myself more and set more weight loss goals =/
  • MsNewBooty83
    MsNewBooty83 Posts: 985 Member
    there is no cure for ugly,
    but! beauty is in the eye of the beer holder..err ummm...i mean beholder...
    confidence is always sexy!!! work on that ;)
    and ur not freaking ugly btw.
  • cmwhited6204
    cmwhited6204 Posts: 210 Member
    OMG, I cannot read this crap. Ladies, take a step back and grow some balls. You are as pretty, strong and confident as you allow yourself to be. So many of you are very attractive and are most likely even more so on the inside. You need to work on yourself for YOU and no one else.

    If you have to tell yourself every hour that you are pretty, strong and confident then do it. No more of this negative talk about yourselves.

    It starts in YOUR head first. Who cares what others think!!!! Care about what you think first!!!
  • Bunnehface
    Bunnehface Posts: 129 Member
    I wouldn't say I ever felt pretty or beautiful when I was slimmer, but I did feel more confident in myself and more attractive to the opposite sex. I've never felt attractive when I've been big.

    Ultimately ugliness has nothing to do with your attractiveness to other people though, I think I'm a heifer but my fiancé evidently disagrees or he wouldn't be marrying me, wouldn't have a daughter with me and wouldn't tell me I'm beautiful every day!
  • curvychaos
    curvychaos Posts: 26
    ALL OF YOU GUYS ARE SEXY BEASTS!!! =p

    Right back atcha! :D
  • rwhawkes
    rwhawkes Posts: 117 Member
    When I look at myself alone, I generally don't think "Oh there's a fata$$" but when I'm dancing or running, I am *seriously* hampered by the extra person that I am wearing.

    I am expecting that when I drop my 100lbs or so and feel light as the wind, that life will be great.

    So, short answer is yes absolutely.
  • LycraLegs
    LycraLegs Posts: 62 Member
    Pull yourself together people! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder - we are all different species of beautiful - all!
    Loosing the weight will not assure success or confidence - you have to work on that in tandem... happy people are more beautiful so be happier (no sweat required) and that will be a great start! :)
  • firefly171717
    firefly171717 Posts: 226 Member
    no losing weight will not make me feel better. i already feel like i'm an attractive person but i'd like to be healthy and more physical.

    Yes! Lets focus on this
  • louiselebeau
    louiselebeau Posts: 220 Member
    I am glad that I really do not think I am a completely unattractive person. I know that in order to have as many good looking friends as I do I must be pretty okay. You choose friends on your own plane of attractiveness, that's a freaky brain thing everyone does. I do know that carrying this extra weight makes my face look all sort of squashy, I have good features, just squashy ones. Then again I am not losing weight for looks. I am doing it for health.

    If I was doing it for looks I guess I would have started sooner. I also think that I was made fun of to a point where i refuse to give a frak about how I look. I rock it when I feel it. I know that someone somewhere will always find anyone attractive, myself included. I think most of you guys need to realize that too. Most of y'all are way more attractive than I am, and fitter, LOVE yourself! YOU are all you have!
  • Nelliebird1430
    Nelliebird1430 Posts: 108
    Pull yourself together people! Beauty is in the eye of the beholder - we are all different species of beautiful - all!
    Loosing the weight will not assure success or confidence - you have to work on that in tandem... happy people are more beautiful so be happier (no sweat required) and that will be a great start! :)

    ^ THIS!! Stop worrying about being perfect and pretty and worry about being the best YOU that you can be! No one is like you, and never will be! Take pride in that and put a smile on your face! YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!! :flowerforyou:
  • Lyssa62
    Lyssa62 Posts: 930 Member
    I just feel so insecure and unattractive all the time and I used to say "Okay, when the weight comes off I'll be prettier." But those two times I lost 20 pounds? I still felt.. Ugly. Do you feel the same? Maybe I'm just insecure all the way around.

    u have looked in the mirror right? Cuz you are BEAUTIFUL! You are kick *kitten* beautiful and you need to remember that.
  • DawnieB1977
    DawnieB1977 Posts: 4,248 Member
    I don't think I'm ugly, but I think my fat belly is ugly! Even when I was bigger (after having my baby) I wasn't ugly, just overweight, and I didn't feel comfortable or confident.

    I still don't feel I'm attractive as i could be, and I feel like I'm starting to look my age now, whereas in the past people have always thought I was younger than I am. Having 2 small kids and not getting enough sleep doesn't help matters.
  • CharleneExtreme
    CharleneExtreme Posts: 372
    I thoroughly despise how i look. Its mostly my weight but there are other things. I believe i might have slightly more confidence when i lose weight but, if i'm honest, i can almost guarantee some other insecurity will take its place. I'll have to work on my mental health as well as physical.
  • salcha76
    salcha76 Posts: 287 Member
    I'm mortified at all the responses on here. Beauty is within, period. If you hate yourself, you are an ugly person. You have to learn to love and accept yourself to move forward with beauty. The whining about weight & self esteem & insecurities....that's like a hampster on a wheel, it gets you know where. You can drop the lbs but still be horribly ugly inside and unhappy. Learn to love yourself because you are you....then learn that you deserve to be happy and respectful of your body, healthier....and take it from there, the beauty will shine through.
  • Gangofwolves
    Gangofwolves Posts: 5
    Going to see what happens after all the weight is lost ! Hopefully I'll just have a better image of myself.
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    I'm mortified at all the responses on here. Beauty is within, period. If you hate yourself, you are an ugly person. You have to learn to love and accept yourself to move forward with beauty. The whining about weight & self esteem & insecurities....that's like a hampster on a wheel, it gets you know where. You can drop the lbs but still be horribly ugly inside and unhappy. Learn to love yourself because you are you....then learn that you deserve to be happy and respectful of your body, healthier....and take it from there, the beauty will shine through.

    LOL!

    I love how you just told every insecure person here that they are, indeed, ugly. Good job. *slow clap* No, really. Good for you!
  • greenpointmoni
    greenpointmoni Posts: 69
    For those that aren't 'conventionally' attractive, there will always be shallow people who may not give you the time of day because you're not the what they consider 'attractive'. So screw them, shallow people are terrible people. For the rest of us, beauty is on the inside. I've met some people that many would consider 'unattractive' or overweight, and found myself very attracted to them because of their personality and who they were. On the other hand, I've met some drop dead gorgeous people that I found hideous because of their personality. Just focus on building your confidence and liking yourself because that's what really matters.
  • creech6317
    creech6317 Posts: 869 Member
    I've only lost 25 lbs. but have went from a size 14 to a size 6 and I still feel fat.
    I have always thought I was cute and had the confidence to match. But when I look at myself in the mirror I still see the same size 14 body. I actually had someone say I was thin yesterday and was ready to argue with them about it, because I still see myself as big.
    Hopefully my brain will soon lose the weight my body has so that I can see what I look like to others.
  • The_New_Christina
    The_New_Christina Posts: 818 Member
    I've always loved myself at my biggest and my smallest and I've always thought I'm beautiful. F what everyone else thinks! :happy:
  • Julieta17
    Julieta17 Posts: 37
    I'm mortified at all the responses on here. Beauty is within, period. If you hate yourself, you are an ugly person. You have to learn to love and accept yourself to move forward with beauty. The whining about weight & self esteem & insecurities....that's like a hampster on a wheel, it gets you know where. You can drop the lbs but still be horribly ugly inside and unhappy. Learn to love yourself because you are you....then learn that you deserve to be happy and respectful of your body, healthier....and take it from there, the beauty will shine through.

    Is this like tough love or something?!? I agree with the learning to love & accept yourself BUT calling people with insecurities "ugly" is a bit much. And its not "whining about weight & self esteem" b/c obviously they are doing something about the weight if they are on here and losing! And in case you can't tell by the amount of responses... self esteem can be a lot harder to work on for some people!

    :smile:
  • Ras_py
    Ras_py Posts: 129 Member
    I'm mortified at all the responses on here. Beauty is within, period. If you hate yourself, you are an ugly person. You have to learn to love and accept yourself to move forward with beauty. The whining about weight & self esteem & insecurities....that's like a hampster on a wheel, it gets you know where. You can drop the lbs but still be horribly ugly inside and unhappy. Learn to love yourself because you are you....then learn that you deserve to be happy and respectful of your body, healthier....and take it from there, the beauty will shine through.

    loving yourself has nothing to do with the beauty you have on the inside. and if you hate yourself it doesn't mean you are an ugly person in the least. while it is true you can drop weight and still be an horrible person, ugly on the inside, that has absolutely nothing to do with not liking the way you look.. im more mortified by your response that if you have insecurities you are a terrible person on the inside and out.. news flash 99% of women feel this way abt themselves. and even if you have all the self confidence in the world it doesn't mean you are exempt from being a nasty person, just bc you love yourself. lol what a concept you just threw out there.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    OMG, I cannot read this crap. Ladies, take a step back and grow some balls. You are as pretty, strong and confident as you allow yourself to be. So many of you are very attractive and are most likely even more so on the inside. You need to work on yourself for YOU and no one else.

    If you have to tell yourself every hour that you are pretty, strong and confident then do it. No more of this negative talk about yourselves.

    It starts in YOUR head first. Who cares what others think!!!! Care about what you think first!!!

    OMG, I cannot read this crap. Ladies, take a step back and cherish what you've overcome. You are as pretty, strong and confident as believe you are worth. If you dont think you are worth much, then go back and rediscover your worth. VALUE is what makes you beautiful, not "whats on the inside". You need to understand what is involved in doing something for yourself, because youve never had the chance to explore what that even means. People just get mad at you and scream at you to do it.

    Dont tell yourself anything every hour unless you wanna stop believing it by tomorrow.

    It starts in your HEART first. We all care what other people think, the people we love, the people we have to live up to, our bosses, the public, our families, our exes, the btches at work, our tiny girlfriends..... They value you, and it's ok to value yourself.

    ^^ FiXED YOUR MEAN DISMISSIVE POST.

    meanwhile...

    You know what I had to do?

    I kept hearing all the time, youre beautiful! youre powerful! youre inspiring! youre strong! youre so motivating! youre incredible! youre so awesome! that all of it turned into one big fat ALL OF EARTH IS ONE CONDESCENDING BTCH, and i cant believe anything out of these people's mouthsm and worse than all that- everything I do and its my looks that they compliment? what about all the hard sht Ive done!?!?!?!

    So i found a word that describes me, that people have unanimously agreed on for me since I was a tiny little baby girl. SHINY.

    its not an overly positive descriptor, so much that it is just a descriptor. It isnt something i can take credit for having, only for cultivating. I was both born with and I earned it. No one can take that away from me.

    No one can take my shiny, ever ever ever. Its not about looks. its not about achievements. Its just a fact. Im shiny.

    Find your word you can cling to- once that has nothing to do with beautiful or ugly and ADOPT IT. Cherish it. Become IT.
  • DoinItForMe32
    DoinItForMe32 Posts: 20
    It just goes to show that its not the weight that is wrong with you its your self esteem and self perception. You need to get that sorted or you will always find yourself unhappy and going up and down with your weight. You have 1 life to live, why do you chose to live it that way?

    Just saying.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    I'm mortified at all the responses on here. If you hate yourself, you are an ugly person.

    so... I have this friend who had an abusive father and two abusive uncles, who used to kick her around the yard until she was old enough to start going to school. Then they would make her stay home all the time so she kept failing grades. By the time she was 13 she was pregnant and had never been shown love.

    She was taught she had no value. Im sure she is going to be really excited when I call her and let her know that this makes her ugly!!!

    Thanks for the info, you heartless wonder!

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