Marriage values in our society....
Replies
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When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.0 -
go!0
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*GASP* How dare you have a perception of people based on their honesty, integrity, faithfulness, and sincerity of character in keeping the vows they make!
Sarcasm. ^
By the way, FR SENT!0 -
When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
"the good ol days" wasnt my statement... try again.0 -
Let me break it to you: It has always been that way, it is just much more easy to know about these things now. Study history, infidelity all over the place!
Yes but times have changed. So have circumstances back then it was much more difficult to dissolve a marraige... it usually ended up in the man sending the woman off to her death.... Things have now changed. Women are just as unfaithful and men...
I agree that its no ones place to comment on other peoples relationships and all couples may have different views of what a marriage should be like.
People now get married for all the wrong reasons... I was married
to whom i thought was the man of my dreams 8 months in i started getting contacted by multiple women advising me that he has been unfaithful for the past 2.5 years... which means he never had any intention of being faithful... that... would be getting married for the wrong reasons 0 -
No one has the place to judge anyone else's relationship, you just do not know what kind of arrangement or relationship they have and are comfortable with, you can not judge a book by it's cover so to speak. I know several married couples who text other people and have male and female friends that border on flirting, but it is all in jest and just silliness, however their spouses also know their spouses would never cross "that" line. To me it is about understanding each other and being secure.
This. My fiance and I text and talk to people of the other gender without getting mad at one another at all. He has some female friends that he's known since high school, and I have some close male friends from college that we talk to regularly. There is no reason that we should stop talking to them just because we're in a relationship now because we both know we're not going to cheat. And I don't get mad when he tells me about his man-crushes, nor does he get mad at me when I tell him my woman-crushes. This is what works in our relationship, and if anybody doesn't like it, that's their problem.0 -
You're right; none of us have any values.
I, too, miss the old marriage values of society. When women were forced to marry the men who raped them. Or when women were considered property and nothing more. Or when women couldn't marry someone of a different race.
Yup. No values today. We've only gone downhill.
Yep, I think I love you!!!
While I understand that different people have different values, what about the couple that has an "open" marriage. If you have agreed-upon "rules" and you both abide by those rules....is that considered "cheating"? Here's the dictionary definition:
1.Act dishonestly or unfairly in order to gain an advantage, esp. in a game or examination: "she cheats at cards".
2.Deceive or trick.
Yes, I've been cheated on. It sucks. It wasn't because I wasn't putting out enough at home - it was something new and exciting that catered to his ego. Nothing more.
Different people/cultures/religions have different values/philosophies about marriage. Mormons, Muslims, Pagans, Christians....etc.0 -
If you are a married female.. I am your James Bond.. Haha..
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Yes, people have cheated throughout history. That does not excuse it. I think the issue the OP is really having is society no longer stigmatizes the act like they used to. As a society we no longer hold each other for crappy behavior. Many of the responses are "if it doesn't affect you why do you care?" True infidelity may not affect us on a daily basis. That does not mean we have to agree with it or ignore it. Think about your political hot button abortion, gun control, gay marriage, or the death penalty, If it doesn't affect you why do you care about these issues. We do care and have a right to express an opinion without being mocked or ridiculed. (I know everyone is a tough guy on the internet)
I believe marriage is sacred because I made promise to my wife and God. I always find it interesting that many atheists make statements about people of faith being stupid because we believe in a high power. I disagree with your beliefs, but I don't mock you for having the courage to express your beliefs. Have some basic human decency and show some respect for others.
Emotional cheating is a real thing and until you’re in a loving a committed relationship it cannot be fully understood. In the end if I am more emotionally connected to someone than my wife, I am not respecting her and am cheating.
People have a right to express their beliefs, but can you do it without a—hole?
THIS THIS THIS
Is my marriage less sacred because we got married by a justice of the peace and did not make any promises to God? Oh and we're not atheists, my husband was raised Protestant and I'm half Jewish.
I expressed my belief that marriage is sacred, it did not but limits on it. I made a promise to God and that is a sacred vow to me. It sounds like your marriage has lasted the test of time, good for you. Though I would point out that relationships based in faith (not just Christian) statistically have smaller divorce rate.0 -
When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
the thing with message boards is that you really need to pay attention and match the correct statement with the correct person. the statement "the good ole days" doesnt belong to me. i simply answered someones question when they asked, by our society, who do you mean, and i said, maybe shes talking about humanity... got to read the message boards a little bit better...0 -
When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
"the good ol days" wasnt my statement... try again.
So at what time in history did "humanity have morals and ethics" then?? That was your statement.0 -
Why do I feel like most people are missing the point? It's ultimately about dishonesty- cheating, secret romance, etc… is dishonest. Whether you're married or not, if you're in a committed, monogamous relationship, doing something behind your SO's back is wrong.
I would love to hear the arguments against my statement. 0 -
The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.
And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.
My thoughts exactly. Couldn't have said it any better! The lack of values these days is a disgrace to humanity and our Creator. It is sad how the marriage covenant is not taken as seriously these days. People go into it thinking if it doesn't work out then there is always divorce (or adultery), but that is not the correct view of the marriage covenant.0 -
You're right; none of us have any values.
I, too, miss the old marriage values of society. When women were forced to marry the men who raped them. Or when women were considered property and nothing more. Or when women couldn't marry someone of a different race.
Yup. No values today. We've only gone downhill.
'nuff said0 -
seriously tho..... this happen to me... best thing he ever did... I dont hate him nor am I bitter... I am just thankful I found me... Here is how I see it because for some reason I wanted to understand this.... us woman think we have it all when he marrys us...we give him his kids but that doesnt mean we stop loving him....this is where we think we still love him and keep the household running.. you know the good wife.... how many times have we put the kids before him or lack the sex in the bedroom cause we are tired????? what made him think we were the one has now changed... one of the partners grow with age and the other stays the same.....I can see how it happens..not always the woman's fault either..woman are equal in this game of wanting more.. we want him to say how wonderful we are and beautiful, sexy or what ever... do you still desire your partner like you did at the beginning... for most of us life happens and we try to plan dates etc... its not working...one partner is not worse then the other.... it means we need a marriage contract that we have to work on each year to renew to make sure both partners feel wanted, desired and are getting what they expected out of a marriage... staying for the kids or money..is for the birds...... good luck all...we all own this one...after all we are adults....0
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When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
"the good ol days" wasnt my statement... try again.
So at what time in history did "humanity have morals and ethics" then?? That was your statement.
lets re-read again, WHAT I SAID WAS... MORE THAN LIKELY SHE MEANS... blah blah blah... so, like i stated before, i was answering someones question with what I THINK SHE IS REFERING TO...0 -
The responses to this thread already show the lack of values.
No, it's not her business, but apparently it's something she wished to talk about. Marriage is supposed to be sacred. And people are throwing it away like it means nothing. So I totally agree with this post. Is it my business whether someone else has an affair? No... but that doesn't take away from the fact that the world's population is lacking morals and values.
And why in the world do you bother commenting on such a post if you just want to say it's none of their business? It doesn't really make sense. If you don't want to discuss it, then find your way out.
My thoughts exactly. Couldn't have said it any better! The lack of values these days is a disgrace to humanity and our Creator. It is sad how the marriage covenant is not taken as seriously these days. People go into it thinking if it doesn't work out then there is always divorce (or adultery), but that is not the correct view of the marriage covenant.
But where people will jump all over you is because you mentioned our Creator. So they ultimately put you in the "those Christians" category. Leaving religion completely out of it, when you make certain promises to be faithful, you should keep them. Whether you get married in church or not, its all besides the point. If your vows contain, and we can have an open marriage and do whoever whenever... then good for you I suppose. But if you promise faithfulness, honestly and to hold your SO dearly, then keep it. Divorce is so easy for people to jump to anymore. Things get hard and people call their attorney's.
BUT... thank you so much for agreeing with me sweets! I'm sending you a FR!0 -
Yes, people have cheated throughout history. That does not excuse it. I think the issue the OP is really having is society no longer stigmatizes the act like they used to. As a society we no longer hold each other for crappy behavior. Many of the responses are "if it doesn't affect you why do you care?" True infidelity may not affect us on a daily basis. That does not mean we have to agree with it or ignore it. Think about your political hot button abortion, gun control, gay marriage, or the death penalty, If it doesn't affect you why do you care about these issues. We do care and have a right to express an opinion without being mocked or ridiculed. (I know everyone is a tough guy on the internet)
I believe marriage is sacred because I made promise to my wife and God. I always find it interesting that many atheists make statements about people of faith being stupid because we believe in a high power. I disagree with your beliefs, but I don't mock you for having the courage to express your beliefs. Have some basic human decency and show some respect for others.
Emotional cheating is a real thing and until you’re in a loving a committed relationship it cannot be fully understood. In the end if I am more emotionally connected to someone than my wife, I am not respecting her and am cheating.
People have a right to express their beliefs, but can you do it without a—hole?
THIS THIS THIS
Is my marriage less sacred because we got married by a justice of the peace and did not make any promises to God? Oh and we're not atheists, my husband was raised Protestant and I'm half Jewish.
I don't think that was his point. I think his vows were made to his wife and to God, but I don't think he was bashing you for how you made yours. He was stating the importance of his. He pointed out he does not care if you are athiest or whatever else. He just believes in human decency.
I am a Christian, but I don't care if you are gay, or whatever. It doesn't effect me. And I agree, some gay people hold marriage more dear to their heart than some straight people. I just think if you enter into such an agreement with someone you love, then hold it close to your heart and keep the promises you made!
This. it doesn't matter WHO you are married to, or HOW you married them, but if you made a promise to them, FFS, KEEP IT!0 -
What about not-nice people?I feel bad for nice people who are cheated on. That is all.0 -
When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
"the good ol days" wasnt my statement... try again.
So at what time in history did "humanity have morals and ethics" then?? That was your statement.
lets re-read again, WHAT I SAID WAS... MORE THAN LIKELY SHE MEANS... blah blah blah... so, like i stated before, i was answering someones question with what I THINK SHE IS REFERING TO...
but, if you are looking for statistics, you can google crime rates, teen pregnancy rates, and other societal statistics that can show a increase in the moral decline in society...0 -
These are all considered Affairs....whether physical and/or emotional....they are still affairs.
That is your opinion.
It is not an opinion, it is the actual definition of affair.
af·fair (-fâr)
n.
1. Something done or to be done; business.
2. affairs Transactions and other matters of professional or public business: affairs of state.
3.
a. An occurrence, event, or matter: The senator's death was a tragic affair.
b. A social function.
4. An object or a contrivance: Their first car was a ramshackle affair.
5. A matter of personal concern.
6. affairs Personal business: get one's affairs in order.
7. A matter causing public scandal and controversy: the Dreyfus affair.
8. A romantic and/or sexual relationship, sometimes one of brief duration, between two people who are not married to each other.
Looks like you're going to have to find a new tactic in your crusade to defend infidelity. Good luck.
WOW you must have gotten a degree from Google University...outstanding!
not sure I give a ****...but way to go!
Soooo, because i found it on Google, Webster is suddenly wrong, or to be discredited?
Not quite sure how you arrived to that line of logic...0 -
This is why marriage is no longer working:
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You're right; none of us have any values.
I, too, miss the old marriage values of society. When women were forced to marry the men who raped them. Or when women were considered property and nothing more. Or when women couldn't marry someone of a different race.
Yup. No values today. We've only gone downhill.
The above noted are not values. Unfortunately they were practice by an uninformed society. Are you saying you’re happy that the American divorce rate is around 50%? is that progress? The values she referees to people loving each other and sacrificing instant pleasure for a marriage built on monogamy. Why can't we be a society that promotes honesty, monogamy, and self-respect? I don't think she is petitioning for a return to dark ages0 -
AWWWWW :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:These are all considered Affairs....whether physical and/or emotional....they are still affairs.
That is your opinion.
Looks like you're going to have to find a new tactic in your crusade to defend infidelity. Good luck.
I notice you removed the part of my quote where I completely shot down your argument and made you look like an *ss. Cute.
You're still wrong, though.
I deleted the part you Googled. Is that a crime?0 -
Are you sugesting that her preconceptions about sexual morality (if there's such a thing) should be taken into consideration by people that have other views in this matter? It's not a rhetoric question, please do answer.
And if yes, could you give me reasons, outside religion of course, to explain why 'sexual exclusivity' equals 'morality'?
IMO, marriage is merely a contractual/legal relation between those who marry creating legal rights and duties among them, as far as the rest of society is concerned. The subject of individual and personal sexual pleasure/satisfaction or even self image that derives from sexual conquest is, in my humble opinion, something that should not be judged by others, excepting the cases in where social damage is clearly demonstrated (pedophilia).
To say that marriage is 'sacred'0 -
To say that marriage is sacred is to deny the legal bound - a right of everyone - by excluding those who do not follow your religion.0
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When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
"the good ol days" wasnt my statement... try again.
So at what time in history did "humanity have morals and ethics" then?? That was your statement.
lets re-read again, WHAT I SAID WAS... MORE THAN LIKELY SHE MEANS... blah blah blah... so, like i stated before, i was answering someones question with what I THINK SHE IS REFERING TO...
but, if you are looking for statistics, you can google crime rates, teen pregnancy rates, and other societal statistics that can show a decrease in the moral decline in society...
How about the statistics that show a decline in slavery, spousal floggings, and burnings at the stake of people thought to be "witches"? Or does that not have any bearing on the moral fabric of society?0 -
so true dirtnap..... it was hidden or the woman turned the blind eye... what changed is she went to work and now has her own income and can see how well men had it back in the day when she was at his beck and call due to him being the bread winner.... Ladies ask your mom and about the stories when she grew up...she has lots to share.... I even heard stories about a woman who's husband went away to work only to have his brother go help her out
... god love him... lots of cheating going on back in the good ol days. 0 -
Oh Lordy, I hope no one breaks the news to her that Mary Magdaline was a *kitten*.... it'll break her heart....0
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When you say "our" society, which one do you mean?
more than likely, shes talking about humanity. humanity once had morals and ethics, not so much anymore...
Tell that to the Sodomites
why would i tell the sodomites that? what a silly statement...
No sillier than your statement. "The good ole days" weren't that good, they were just better at hiding things. At no time in our history was humanity more "pure" than it is today. Stop looking at history through rose coloured glasses.
"the good ol days" wasnt my statement... try again.
So at what time in history did "humanity have morals and ethics" then?? That was your statement.
lets re-read again, WHAT I SAID WAS... MORE THAN LIKELY SHE MEANS... blah blah blah... so, like i stated before, i was answering someones question with what I THINK SHE IS REFERING TO...
but, if you are looking for statistics, you can google crime rates, teen pregnancy rates, and other societal statistics that can show a decrease in the moral decline in society...
How about the statistics that show a decline in slavery, spousal floggings, and burnings at the stake of people thought to be "witches"? Or does that not have any bearing on the moral fabric of society?
oh, im sorry, i didnt know we were talking about witches... i thought this was a discussion on morality... are we also going to debate statistics regarding the use of tampons vs kotex? lets stay on topic, mkay?0
This discussion has been closed.
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