This site should not be about weight loss bullies !

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  • crazy4lulu
    crazy4lulu Posts: 822 Member
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    i ... am not a bully.... i am here to support and help in anyway i can.... i expect the same back. we are all human... we all have our faults. i am a personal trainer that has a massive sweet tooth. you can try to beat me down but i will still get up again. and again ...and again!!!!!
  • EvanKeel
    EvanKeel Posts: 1,904 Member
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    Sorry, most of the time it isn't bullying. Don't get me wrong. It's rude and uncalled for. At best, many of those responses assume a level of informality and "friendship" that only exists in the heads of the person being rude--at least in relation to the OP. It's more likely they just enjoy the attention they get from attempting to be witty at someone else's expense.

    I wouldn't call it bullying though. Not to say it can't happen, but I think people should be a little careful with that word these days.
  • firstsip
    firstsip Posts: 8,399 Member
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    ITA. Seriously. I cannot imagine some of these people acting this way offline. It is bullying behavior pure & simple. Just one small example: a newbie asked a question about calf exercises, and someone posted sarcastically that calves were in the meadow. Of course several regulars had to say how clever that was (it was????). I'm sure the newbie made the unforgiveaqble mistake of using the word "toning" thus opening him or her up to obscene ridicule by the forum regs who claim they are sick to death of answering the same questions although no one's forcing them to do it. They just need to step on someone to feel good about themselves. There are worst example of bullying here, but that one stuck in my mind as it was very similar to a sarcastic response my middle schooler had heard the week before. At middle school.

    Oh and then there are the constant posts about women just being jealous of each other. Sexism is alive and well here. Racism would never be tolerated (and it should never be!), but it's OK to rip women apart.

    That's not bullying. It's called a joke. It wasn't at the person's expense, it was wordplay.

    All you people who mistake humor, or even sarcasm, with the "use of force and coercion to bully and intimidate others" must live in a very pleasant world. Really. When I was getting chairs pulled out from under me, cornered in hallways and berated for sticking my neck out for quieter kids, and consistently called "ugly," "horseface" and given carrots when I walked in a room, I could have gone for a joke that wasn't about *me*, but was about a funny coincidence of words. Goddamn Shakespeare used wordplay similar to the one you commented on; and that's really considered bullying by you?

    And the people who "rip" apart women are generally not the same people making the clever wordplay.

    Who are these "they" and "them"? It seems like anyone that disagrees with someone, or makes a joke they don't get, or just grinds their gears, becomes part of this inexplicable other of "bullies."

    That's. Not. Bullying.

    This thread comes up all the time, yes. Does that mean there's a problem? Maybe, but not of "bullying."
  • josiereside
    josiereside Posts: 720 Member
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    I agree with you 100%... sometimes I am leery to post something. You can have an opinion but you should not criticize someone for doing something... I don't always agree with what others are doing but if I voice my opinion I will say something like, well this worked for me. Some people don't get that it is not a one size fits all.
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
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    I've only been on here 3 days and I've already been bullied, but it was my fault for wandering over into the kiddie pool (Chit Chat section). So far from what I've read in the other sections, people here are generally nicer than most internet boards. lol But there's definitely something about the internet that brings out the worst in people.

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  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
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    It's true. People can be very nasty when it comes to certain things and one of the biggies is that particular diet. I don't necessarily like the atmosphere either, but some days I just need to have some camaraderie with others doing the diet thing and pop in and read and occasionally reply. I'm so worried about anyone saying something about my food log that I never hit the complete entry button for the day. I can relate.

    If one of my friends decided to criticize my food log I'd be fine with telling them off. I'm not afraid.
  • EatClean_WashUrNuts
    EatClean_WashUrNuts Posts: 1,590 Member
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    OP - Without knowing fully what was posted...keep in mind that perception and interpretation of written word is dramatically impacted by your emotions at the moment you read.

    For instance....you were on HCG, you found some success. I see that with you being back you did not get what you were looking for. Nothing has been stated as to why you are no longer on HCG. I'm pretty sure there were comments made about that choice being unsafe, not suitable for long-term, and that eat so little is unhealthy. IMHO, had you taken a healthier and more lifestyle driven process you would most likely be in a better position, both physically and financially.

    Being "bullied" on this site, can be taken simply by misreading how I wrote that. Rather than take everything you see in a negative manner, take the positives, look at the what you percieve as negative for positive influence, and skip the BS.
  • moustache_flavored_lube
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    Bully is quite the new buzzword. All these adults that complain about getting bullied are ridiculous.

    Someone disagreeing with you on the internet != bullying

    Someone making a joke on a thread you post != bullying

    Glad you lost weight and stuck around the sight

    Oh an HGC is terribly unhealthy :D
  • Paijj
    Paijj Posts: 11
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    This is why I lurk on the threads, post very rarely(and then in mostly off topic threads) and I would never feel comfortable posting my back story . Just from reading other threads, I know I would get a ton of negativity. I came here because it's a great way to hold MYSELF accountable with the food tracker and I do troll the community because I enjoy the success stories and inspiration I get from pics and success stories. Welcome back...
  • mcedes02
    mcedes02 Posts: 56 Member
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    I've been on for quite some time and have been very timid about asking for new friends to help push me thru the last part of my journey for that very reason. I've read A LOT of nasty posts on here. I don't give a crap what ppl think of me. I'm doing this the best I can!! Feel free to add me!!
  • DenverGirl93
    DenverGirl93 Posts: 32 Member
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    seems that people get a lot of courage when they r behind their computers..its a shame that anyone should have to feel bullied on any forum and it happens in most forums -good thing there is the block and unfriend buttons! :)
  • pocodonn
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    Yknow what works for me? Not giving a **** what people say or think about me.

    This works!!
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
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    Bully is quite the new buzzword. All these adults that complain about getting bullied are ridiculous.

    Someone disagreeing with you on the internet != bullying

    Someone making a joke on a thread you post != bullying

    Glad you lost weight and stuck around the sight

    Oh an HGC is terribly unhealthy :D

    yeah, i agree that people use the term "bully" a little too lightly on the internet.
  • trogalicious
    trogalicious Posts: 4,583 Member
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    For the most part, I really don't care what other people are doing. Some of my friends are low carb, some are low calorie and some are even bulking.

    I don't condone dangerous behaviors like ED's and the issue I have with VLCD is that your body can not get the basic nutrition that it needs to function properly if you only have 500 calories to work with.

    Otherwise, live and let live.
    Yes.
  • Aviva92
    Aviva92 Posts: 2,333 Member
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    seems that people get a lot of courage behind their computers..its a shame that anyone should have feel bullied on any forum and it happens in most forums but i have no problem blocking and unfriending :)

    well, i'm not gonna get beat up on the internet if i tell someone off, so it's easier.
  • DontStopB_Leakin
    DontStopB_Leakin Posts: 3,863 Member
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    ITA. Seriously. I cannot imagine some of these people acting this way offline. It is bullying behavior pure & simple. Just one small example: a newbie asked a question about calf exercises, and someone posted sarcastically that calves were in the meadow. Of course several regulars had to say how clever that was (it was????). I'm sure the newbie made the unforgiveaqble mistake of using the word "toning" thus opening him or her up to obscene ridicule by the forum regs who claim they are sick to death of answering the same questions although no one's forcing them to do it. They just need to step on someone to feel good about themselves. There are worst example of bullying here, but that one stuck in my mind as it was very similar to a sarcastic response my middle schooler had heard the week before. At middle school.

    Oh and then there are the constant posts about women just being jealous of each other. Sexism is alive and well here. Racism would never be tolerated (and it should never be!), but it's OK to rip women apart.

    That's not bullying. It's called a joke. It wasn't at the person's expense, it was wordplay.

    All you people who mistake humor, or even sarcasm, with the "use of force and coercion to bully and intimidate others" must live in a very pleasant world. Really. When I was getting chairs pulled out from under me, cornered in hallways and berated for sticking my neck out for quieter kids, and consistently called "ugly," "horseface" and given carrots when I walked in a room, I could have gone for a joke that wasn't about *me*, but was about a funny coincidence of words. Goddamn Shakespeare used wordplay similar to the one you commented on; and that's really considered bullying by you?

    And the people who "rip" apart women are generally not the same people making the clever wordplay.

    Who are these "they" and "them"? It seems like anyone that disagrees with someone, or makes a joke they don't get, or just grinds their gears, becomes part of this inexplicable other of "bullies."

    That's. Not. Bullying.

    This thread comes up all the time, yes. Does that mean there's a problem? Maybe, but not of "bullying."
    ^This.

    It makes my blood boil every time I see the word "bully" thrown around on here, because 90% of the time, no one is being bullied.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
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    Yknow what works for me? Not giving a **** what people say or think about me.

    :flowerforyou:
    +1
    It's called honesty. Following some silly diet that is not healthy over the long term is not a good idea. Period. And some are going to call you out on it because THEY ARE NOT SAFE OR HEALTHY.

    Damn I miss yoovie already.
  • juliekaiser1988
    juliekaiser1988 Posts: 604 Member
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    Bully is quite the new buzzword. All these adults that complain about getting bullied are ridiculous.

    Someone disagreeing with you on the internet != bullying

    Someone making a joke on a thread you post != bullying

    Glad you lost weight and stuck around the sight

    Oh an HGC is terribly unhealthy :D

    AMEN!!
  • newdaydawning79
    newdaydawning79 Posts: 1,503 Member
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    I agree that there are a few who may be rude but I've had a ton of supportive people add me and I have made sure to support them every step of the way.

    I didn't know what hCG was until you mentioned it and I went to look it up. Are you saying you're injecting yourself with stuff bought from overseas and then not eating to lose weight? That would be the exact opposite of what MFP thinks someone should do, and what most of the people here are trying to accomplish. It doesn't seem healthy in the slightest, and sounds more like pseudoscience than anything.

    This is not being rude, this is being honest.
  • syrklc
    syrklc Posts: 172 Member
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    Ignore all the negative on the site and surround yourself with a positive group of friends. :smile: