He told me he was embarrassed of me while I was pregnant!

Has anyone called troll yet?

Awwww, sweetie, I'm so sorry that you're going through this! You are not alone. I was in a very verbally abusive marriage for 6 years. At first I didn't realize that the snide comments about my love handles etc were abusive but about 5 years into the marriage he actually turned very cruel. I remember asking him one day why we never went out anymore. He pulled me in front of a mirror and said "Have you looked in the mirror lately? That's why we never go out anymore." We've been divorced for 15 years and that comment still hurts. I was never able to feel the same way about him after that. He had destroyed what little bit of self esteem I had left. That was the low point and like you, I had never felt so ugly. I actually started to believe the awful things that he said. The stress he caused me by chastising my weight only made things worse - I'm an emotional/stress eater. What he was doing was only making it worse and I gained even more weight. I also know now, that had I been at an "ideal" weight he probably would have found some other "flaw" to pick at me about.

I don't know everything about your situation so I won't give any advice other than to say that you probably need to go to counseling. It did wonders for me and helped me decide that I was worth more and deserved better than to be treated that way on a daily basis. It took years to get my self-esteem back and feel beautiful again. You deserve to feel beautiful and to be loved and cherished by your partner. I also have this question.......do you want your children to grow up learning that verbally abusing someone is OK? Children model what they see.............

Friend me if you like. I'll be here to listen if you need it.

I agree with all of the above. 1. Run don't walk from this jerk. 2. Get some counselling. You are a worthy person in your own right. 3. Find a local women's support group of some sort. I guess on line at MFP is a start. But a local in person group that meets once a week would be much better. At the risk of being blasted off the board, I also suggest that you consider finding a supportive church in your area and go talk to the pastor. If you are rejected because of your marital and motherhood status find a different church. The rejecting church are not really Christians anyway if that is their attitude.

Blessings in your quest.
NW Bob

I left him back in oct of 2012. I went to the court house and was going to fill out papers for custody. I walked in and saw his mother there. She had gone to court the morning after I had thrown her son out of the house. She told the court that I was a unstable mother due to the fact I was on post pardom meds and that I work 40 hrs a week and she could take better care of my children because she was a stay at home mom. She then told the courts that my home was unfit for children and that I ABUSED AND NEGLECTED MY CHILDREN. None of this was true but it later came out that she had told the court all of those things to make me "wake up" and that my children deserved better and that they deserved two parents in a household. DCYF has been involved and has done a investigation and all of her alligations have been proven false. Because she filled for a emergency petition for guardianship the courts granted her not only temp custody of my 3 mo old at the time but of my three yr old wich is no blood relation to her. I had to go to court 4 days later and I was granted custody of my children back due to the fact that she had no proof of any of her allegations. Every time I think Im going to leave his mother gets involved somehow and Im always in fear. She later admitted what she did wasnt right but she didnt want my kids growning up without her son. SOME GRANDMOTHER SHE IS. Ive been in and out of court several times and they have granted mostly in my favor. But it still comes down to the fact that every time I leave him she reports that Im either neglecting my children or that Im not doing something right. She accidentaly sent me a text which she was sending to everyone she knew apparently.. That I was ****ed in the head for switching bottle nipples and then made fun of my breasts and wrote " Is this what her tits look like? No wonder why he wasnt happy with her" Simply because she had bought all of the bottles and nipples and I chose not to use them due to My sons bad gas.. I was trying a different bottle. If he sneezes or coughs once around her she says " Im not his mother but I think he should be seen" Then she tells the dcyf investigator that Im neglecting him... Ive worked at a daycare for 8 yrs.. Ive brought him to the doctor 8 times in 2 and a half months. His mother is crazy.... As long as I stay with her son she doesnt do anything. I cant afford another $1300 lawyered up court date. I own my own home and car.. I pay all the bills.. Leaving him isnt the problem. Leaving him and not having his mother lie to take my children away is the problem. Im trying to save a relationship.. a family... trying to avoid court and more undeserved pain. WHY DOES HE HATE ME SINCE IVE GOTN PREGNANT and Had his child?

My question is. When I lose the weight and im down at my goal weight of 150. Will I be able to look at him the same Or is the pain that hes caused by all of the insults going to stay with me? Has anyone gotn through this?

I don't get why leaving him is out of the question. I understand that you have a kid together, plus one from a previous relationship...but good Lord, leave this idiot!
I'm sure it's easier said than done. But remember, you are choosing to bring up your children in a household with verbal and emotional abuse. They should be growing up seeing love and happiness.