Online dating

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Replies

  • richardheath
    richardheath Posts: 1,276 Member
    The funny part is that I did ehormony and I actually got dates. Met a few good people on the site and one of them I have remained friends with.

    I think it depends on where you are, and which site has "critical mass" in your location. The only date I got from eharmony was the dog poo lady.
  • MightyDomo
    MightyDomo Posts: 1,265 Member
    I am trying online dating as well and I can tell you for sure the reasons that I don't answer people back are pretty much as follows:

    - Horrible spelling or not even spelling words at all... like there isn't much effort put in to saying hi. Ex. Hey wuts up? or How r u?
    - Just saying Hi and nothing else, no personality and their profile shows no personality (filled in with literally just a filler sentence so the profile can post)
    - Asking for *kitten* or friends with benefit or asking me if I want a sugar daddy as an opener, not exactly what a girl wants to hear unless it's what she was asking for.
    - All your pictures show nothing about you other than the fact you like to take several pictures in the same spot with bad lighting and different facial expressions... or a bunch of them in front of a mirror with your shirt pulled up to show whatever you got (abs or not)

    I find being honest about who you are, what you like and what you are seeking and talking about yourself enough to get a light idea of who you are while leaving some mystery and at least one picture with a nice clear face shot and a few others showing you engaged in things you like will definitely make you more appealing :) And having something to write and at least writing the words properly is a plus too.
  • Cr01502
    Cr01502 Posts: 3,614 Member
    You'd be better off just asking girls out in person.
  • diodelcibo
    diodelcibo Posts: 2,564 Member
    Tried it only ever met crazy people.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    Apparently, we're looking for the same guy...haha! I have the same dealbreakers and definitely stay away from the "skinny" category guys for the same reason. I'm also quite surprsed how hard it is to find a guy that fits this description. The men who have contacted me recently have all been old enough to be my father...no thanks!

    Thank you! I feel more normal now. I thought I was all alone in my quest for what seems to be the holy grail. Giggle.

    And, yes, I forgot about the 50+ crowd. It's no offense to those gentleman - I certainly wish them luck - but my limit is up to 10 years older than me.

    Whats shakin babycakes.....im right in your age group!!!!!! Are you attracted to tall tanned latino men?!?!?!

    Only if you share your wine!

    Ahhhh How did yo know I like wine!? when my name is BEER runner. VERY NICE!!! Are you a white or red wine type of woman????:drinker:

    I have my ways....

    Actually, I got a good laugh out of a thread you started once about drinking a bottle of wine a day. Ha.

    I"m a non-discriminatory wine drinker! Red and white, depending on what I'm eating and the time of day. If I was going to be really specific, I usually have a stockpile of Chardonnay and Pinot Noir.
  • I met my boyfriend on meetme.com we are happy and have been together for 6 months after talking for almost a month prior before meeting.
    I've met quite a few guys on meetme (formerly myyearbook) but 90% of people on dating sites seem to just want a hookup

    Best advice I have is make your profile interesting. I know when I was still looking for dates I wouldnt respond to a guy until I looked at his profile and if that little blurb about him wasn't interesting even if he was the hottest guy on the planet, I wouldn't respond.
  • bearkisses
    bearkisses Posts: 1,252 Member
    my dad met his wife on there. he went through many many dates on there, but eventually a match was made. good luck!
  • LankyYankee
    LankyYankee Posts: 260 Member
    I tried a couple sites last year, I had a pretty bad experience on them all and was left with the feeling that it's definitely become more of a meat market than a tool to meet someone you might want to have a conversation with. Not so much a lack of responses as the types of responses.

    That said I do know people who met long term partners online, Don't get discouraged or think that it's you, good luck!
  • 1ConcreteGirl
    1ConcreteGirl Posts: 3,677 Member
    Ok, can I just interject with some logic?

    OP, the fact that some people found their "soulmate" online shouldn't be encouraging to you. By the law of averages, of course that would happen and there's no guarantee you'll be among their numbers.

    I don't mean this to encourage or discourage you. Simply to say that someone else's anecdotal experience shouldn't be the reason you do something.

    Alright, carry on.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    I'm pretty open to most types, but there are some things that are immediately a turn off including, someone who smokes regularly (been there, done that), someone who does not have a job, someone who does not like animals, someone who can't type a coherent sentence, someone who wants a housewife and someone who does not want children. From a physical perspective, I'd have a hard time dating someone my height or shorter (i'm 5'5) and I prefer a guy who isn't skinnier than I am. If I can take you in a wrestling match, we are probably not a match.

    The other big turnoff is the guy who will only date in the "skinny" category or otherwise comes across as superficial. If I see that, I usually run in the other direction because, to me, it implies that all they care about is looks and I don't want that kind of pressure (been there too and its awful).

    A very nice to have is an interest in traveling and a non-picky eater.

    I wouldn't think this is a tough list, but it's hard to find!

    Wow, agree! You seem so reasonable.
    I'm not the most photogenic person. I know I'm getting blown off by guys who might be interested if they saw the full package in person. That's unfortunate.

    I find that hard to believe :flowerforyou:

    Why thank you. That's nice of you to say :smile:
  • BeingAwesome247
    BeingAwesome247 Posts: 1,171 Member
    Ok, can I just interject with some logic?

    OP, the fact that some people found their "soulmate" online shouldn't be encouraging to you. By the law of averages, of course that would happen and there's no guarantee you'll be among their numbers.

    I don't mean this to encourage or discourage you. Simply to say that someone else's anecdotal experience shouldn't be the reason you do something.

    Alright, carry on.

    And they're generally the exception, not the rule....assume you're the rule
  • justicer68
    justicer68 Posts: 1,223
    Worst case scenario you end up a skin suit.

    LOL Love that movie!!
  • I am now very happily married to the man I met on-line dating 8 years ago hows that for a success story!
  • moonspells
    moonspells Posts: 126 Member
    Have a good profile - if possible, have a female friend you trust look it over for you. Be honest! Have good pictures that show you, as you are now. Full body (clothed, obviously, unless we are talking adultfriendfinder); and close-up of your face; even doing something you enjoy. And then just get out there and have fun. I looked at it as a way to meet new people I wouldn't normally come across, and finding someone special was a bonus.

    Good luck!

    THIS!^^^
    Spend the time to fill out your profile...FULLY (and interestingly, if at all possible...put some of your personality in there!)! When I was online dating, any emails I got from guys who appeared to have spent 5 minutes filling out their profile or who had put absolutely NO thought into it got deleted immediately.
    Be honest and put up several, current pictures. If you "catch" someone by lying, you're only setting yourself up for rejection later. Or worse...you'll get someone you don't really want or doesn't really want you.

    P.S. My fiance and I met, on the site mentioned above in fact, in Nov. 2009 and have been happily together ever since. ;o)
  • etoiles_argentees
    etoiles_argentees Posts: 2,827 Member
    Never been on one of those sites, never will.
  • kimad
    kimad Posts: 3,010 Member
    I have had an indifferent experience. I have dated people online, but nothing has been long term. Longest 9 months.
    It's hard weeding thru the people who are serious or not serious... lots are just emotionally unavailable.

    I have found better luck on the paid sites (I am using eharmony) but I am still looking. What I like is that they are more serious though, so that's good.

    I would say for every 5-8 I reply to, I get 1 response.

    Keep at it, but take breaks when you feel frustrated
  • kimad
    kimad Posts: 3,010 Member

    I assume that most women get so many responses that they probably don't even bother looking at a lot. that doesn't necessairly make me feel much better though.

    I consider myself to be a good catch, and attractive (def. not gross) and I don't get awhole lot on the paid or free sites.
  • BEERRUNNER
    BEERRUNNER Posts: 3,046 Member
    Never been on one of those sites, never will.


    Were all happy for ya!!
  • silvergurl518
    silvergurl518 Posts: 4,123 Member
    i've been doing online dating on and off for the past....8 years...?...in various incarnations. okcupid, jdate, match.com, eharmony (wtf! i didn't find my mate?!?!).

    i'm currently taking a break after the latest string of duds.
  • LorinaLynn
    LorinaLynn Posts: 13,247 Member
    Together 13 years, married 11, with some dude I met through an online dating site. I'd say it worked out very well. :smile:

    I did have to sift through a lot of weirdos first, though.
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  • tynishabeezfit
    tynishabeezfit Posts: 154 Member
    Just don't do this one. It seems a little weird.lol http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6RvyFFjP7RE
  • Most of my relationships started online, including my (very happy) relationship with my bf. You do have to wade through some crap and you have to be very smart about it, but it is possible. There are a lot of nay-sayers out there, but my response is, why not? For all you know, the absolute perfect person for you could live in another state and you would never meet them otherwise. It worked for me because I have social anxiety, and the dating scene is very stressful for me. I could relax and be myself, and when I met someone "for real", I felt a lot more comfortable because all the "getting to know you" stuff was out of the way. Just have fun and be yourself. Good luck! :flowerforyou:
  • etoiles_argentees
    etoiles_argentees Posts: 2,827 Member
    Never been on one of those sites, never will.


    Were all happy for ya!!

    Thank you tan man!
  • fightininggirl
    fightininggirl Posts: 792 Member
    nope I ended up with an abuser online who was not who he claimed to be. its better to date someone you know personally who lives in your area. never again will I do the online dating bit
  • bootsandfros
    bootsandfros Posts: 81 Member
    i signed up for one briefly but didn't like it. i did however meet my fiancee online in a general message board setting similar to this one.
  • Velum_cado
    Velum_cado Posts: 1,608 Member
    I met my husband of four years on a dating site. It's really no different from meeting someone any other way. Just use common sense and get to know them like you would, otherwise.
  • CollegiateGrief
    CollegiateGrief Posts: 552 Member
    Online dating: does not work for women who are still overweight. I hear the stories about women being flooded with 30 messages a day. Nope. More like one every other week from a super creeper.
  • cindiva65
    cindiva65 Posts: 335 Member
    :heart: Ive had alot of so so and disappointing game playing situations with it but it only take meeting ONE good person to make it worthwhile. I met my fiance on a free dating site over 2 yrs ago. I was at the point after all the game players online that I really didn't care anymore. I went out with him and one date turned into another, etc.

    We dated for 2 yrs and this past Oct he proposed to me. So I guess use it as just another tool in meeting new people. The right person will come regardless of the method chosen. I certainly went out on alot of non desirable dates and even a few doomed relationships to the point that I actually got so tired of it all I refused to even date for 5 yrs!

    Going into the dating scene with the right mental attitude makes a difference. Don't look at every single "match" or "wink" as your potential mate. Just take it for what it is and if its meant to be then it will be.

    Good luck!!!
  • tbcass
    tbcass Posts: 23
    It's all about managing your expectations and patience. I met a bunch if duds.... Then, I met my, now, husband. We celebrated our two year anniversary in October and had our son last August. I was in Philadelphia and he was in Eastern NC. We would have never met if it weren't for online dating! Good luck!