What have you learned from your relationships?

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Replies

  • ajhugz
    ajhugz Posts: 452 Member
    I've learned that there is no relationship without trust and communication. There has to be a mutual respect. You shouldn't try to force people to change or change for them. Be proud of who you are and accept other people for who they are. People change when they want to. Also if someone shows you who they truly are, believe them. Sometimes we make excuses for other peoples behavior when we shouldn't. You have to know what love is and love yourself before you can love someone else. So many people get into relationships without knowing what they want from it or just to say they're dating. Sometimes its hard to walk away but necessary.

    Its important to be happy. Not sure? When I didn't know if I was happy or not I made lists. On one paper I listed things that I'm happy with in my life and things I'm not happy with. On another paper I listed the pros and cons of my relationship.
  • ajhugz
    ajhugz Posts: 452 Member
    Can't get in a bad/abusive relationship if you don't date anyone.
    Problem solved
    its not healthy to run from relationships because of a past bad experience. I had a friend who was hit by the father of her child. When she finally got the courage to leave she felt the same way. Counseling helped her and now she's happily engaged without her past relationship hanging over her head. Never let the past keep you from happiness.
  • Dani76babi
    Dani76babi Posts: 82 Member
    Anyone who is unhappy that you have triumphed or who gets upset that you do a little better than them at something, is not someone to be with. They are only trying to pull you down because they are selfish or they don't truly want you to have/be the best..

    Also, Lying is never okay in a relationship. If you can't tell them the truth, then it's not going to work. And if they are willing to lie to you, do you really want that doubt to always be there?
    No lying in relationships or hiding things from each other. Talk things through and be honest.
  • droneofvelvet
    droneofvelvet Posts: 290 Member
    That I am going lesbian after this. :bigsmile:
  • kitcando
    kitcando Posts: 32
    That there is someone out there for everyone and it is not necessarily the person you think it is....love can surprise you when you least expect it.
  • chica6578
    chica6578 Posts: 76 Member
    to be honest with yourself before you can ask anything form your partner. to be happy with yourself before you can ever be happy with anyone else. Always put the children first. its ok to take "me time". It's important to fulfill your own self-worth so that you may show your children the importance of chasing your dreams.
    To not be afraid to ask something out of your partner if you have strong ideals about certain things. never compromise a deal breaker because you CAN find someone with the Same deal breaker ideals. Its ok to compromise on some things. Its actually a must because both parties must be satisfied.
    Don't hide your feelings. be honest. Do not anger quickly and allow your mouth to just spout everything that comes out. Cool down first, Ask for some time to think and then come back when your thoughts make sense to you and you are confident you can convey them understandably to the other party.
    Do not fear your partner. If you do, there is something wrong. (<< That one took a while to figure out)
    i suppose there are more, But thats the big ones to me now
  • dixiewhiskey
    dixiewhiskey Posts: 3,333 Member
    That there is someone out there for everyone and it is not necessarily the person you think it is....love can surprise you when you least expect it.

    THIS.. so much.

    I met my husband, not thinking that anything would ever come of it.. now we are married with children!
  • slkehl
    slkehl Posts: 3,801 Member
    Can't get in a bad/abusive relationship if you don't date anyone.
    Problem solved

    This is my mentality at the moment. I hope someday I can put myself out there and trust again. But when you see the fists finally come out from the sweetest, most gentle man you thought you'd ever met, it's a scary prospect. For now, I'm very happy to be alone.
  • m8605
    m8605 Posts: 102
    Sometimes its like I want a girlfriend so much that sometimes relationships/friendships just blow up in my face (I haven't really dated in 10 years). I'm just happy that I've realized this and am more than happy taking it slow with girls I meet now.

    Relationships require two people and should be balanced in terms of communication. I don't want to have to start all the conversations... this is for relationships in general as well.

    I'm not really up for adding more :\
  • Unknown
    Unknown
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  • lpage67
    lpage67 Posts: 4
    Never date a co-worker!!!!!
  • samantha1242
    samantha1242 Posts: 816 Member
    Never date a co-worker!!!!!

    or a roommate..
  • CaliforniaSweetheart
    CaliforniaSweetheart Posts: 989
    Be careful what kinds of pics you send, may come back to bite you when the relationship ends.
  • Mustang_Susie
    Mustang_Susie Posts: 7,045 Member
    That there is someone out there for everyone and it is not necessarily the person you think it is....love can surprise you when you least expect it.

    My husband & I met on a blind date set up by a firefighter he worked with who also worked (on his off days) as a van driver taking my patients at the nursing home to their appointments.
    It's really a neat story of God working in our lives to bring us together ❤
  • CherokeeBabe
    CherokeeBabe Posts: 1,704 Member
    I've learned that I'm looking forward to my next healthy one ;)
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
    That I am going lesbian after this. :bigsmile:

    Haha!
  • freshvl
    freshvl Posts: 422 Member
    I've learned a lot.

    I learned that I'm better off alone. It's not that I don't like relationships. I do. But, I'm not good in the long term. It just always falls apart. It's my fault, and it's just how it is.

    My kids are sad for me because they think I'm lonely. But I'm not. I'm fine. But I don't see a relationship in my future. I picture myself dying alone.

    I think you and i are on the same wavelength there buddy!
  • Fat_Jimi
    Fat_Jimi Posts: 81
    me times ist just easier to seek forgivness
  • jenilla1
    jenilla1 Posts: 11,118 Member
    Choose wisely. I have learned that you get what you give. Show respect, compassion and care and it will be returned - unless you picked a sociopath. I chose wisely and got myself a total winner! Show pride in your partner. If you're talking trash it reflects poorly on YOU! After all, you picked IT!

    ETA: Sociopaths are really good at hiding themselves, so if you end up with one, don't blame yourself, just escape!!!
  • 76tech
    76tech Posts: 1,455 Member
    You only get out of it what you put in. Always give your all.
  • MystikPixie
    MystikPixie Posts: 342 Member
    I've only learned not to trust anyone and nobody ever wants to be in a relationship with me. It's all always just a lie.
  • AggieLu
    AggieLu Posts: 873 Member
    The best and most important lesson is that GRASS IS NOT GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE, and if it seems this way, TIME TO WATER YOUR OWN LAWN. Forgiveness is a beautiful measure. Be your each other's best friend. Be silly together.
  • Naomi81378
    Naomi81378 Posts: 681 Member
    I have learned I am not going to be taking for granted and I want to be appreciated. And It is important to laugh,smile and be happy. And dont forget the little things like hugging,snuggling and holding hands and saying I love you. And to be there for each other. I have found the love of my life and he is my true love. He is amazing and perfect and I love him so much.
  • PRMinx
    PRMinx Posts: 4,585 Member
    That people lie, even if you don't.
    That people cheat, even if you don't.
    That people are mean, even if you aren't.

    But, the most important lesson I learned on the last one is to trust in my instincts. If something feel's off, than there's a glitch somewhere.
  • digitalbill
    digitalbill Posts: 1,410 Member
    Never date anyone crazier then yourself.
  • iLoveMyPitbull1225
    iLoveMyPitbull1225 Posts: 1,690 Member
    be honest and communicate feelings even if it hurts.
    sex and love are two completely different entities.
    do not settle.
    take nothing for granted and appreciate the things that really matter.
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
    You only get out of it what you put in. Always give your all.

    I agree very much. :smile:
  • jbutterflye
    jbutterflye Posts: 1,914 Member
    The best and most important lesson is that GRASS IS NOT GREENER ON THE OTHER SIDE, and if it seems this way, TIME TO WATER YOUR OWN LAWN. Forgiveness is a beautiful measure. Be your each other's best friend. Be silly together.

    So true! All of it.
  • musicstardust67
    musicstardust67 Posts: 299 Member
    1. Don't return to cheaters

    2. If they lie to you a few times, chances are they've lied to you many more times.

    3. If you're not getting encouragement in any area, that's a red flag.
  • Dontcallitacomeback
    Dontcallitacomeback Posts: 50
    Don't trust anyone........

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