Is it RUDE to offer your "fat clothes" to a friend?

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Replies

  • kgerm317
    kgerm317 Posts: 191 Member
    All the clothes I wear now, I got from a friend who is losing weight along with me, just is a little ahead of me... It has worked out great because I didn't want to spend money on new clothes (especially since I've still got a long way to go before I'm done). Maybe you can ask if she knows of anyone who would be interested in those clothes or a consignment store that you can bring them to... I also like the idea that other people are suggesting of asking her to help you sort them.. What size are they?! I'll take them! hahaha
  • heypurdy
    heypurdy Posts: 196 Member
    Dilemma. I just got rid of a whole wardrobe that doesn't fit me anymore. I know people that I'd like to give them to but I won't. I'm donating them instead. You should do the same.
  • stellcorb
    stellcorb Posts: 294 Member
    I offered a friend some clothes that were too big for me now... she didn't seem offended. I put a spin on it though... she had mentioned that she wanted to lose weight and she was the biggest size she'd ever been so I offered it as not needing to buy any clothes in her larger size. Maybe I have no pride, but I have no problem excepting nice clothes from others even if it's thier old "fat" clothes.
  • girlfromOklahoma
    girlfromOklahoma Posts: 129 Member
    If we were really good friends and the clothes really were something I'd like, I'd be glad to have them. Yeah, I'd probably think dang this sucks that she lost all this weight and I didn't. But on the other hand if I really liked the clothes, I'd get over it quickly. Also, it might motivate me to ask her about her weight loss and to join her on the journey.
  • DeborahBatewell
    DeborahBatewell Posts: 147 Member
    There's no problem with it. You should offer them to someone on MFP that lives close to you. Buying clothes when you're loosing gets expensive.
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    I would also add "And, if anyone has any "thin clothes" they can't fit into anymore, I'd gladly take them off your hands."

    Actually, I wouldn't do that. I have been burned twice now with the dilemma. I lost weight and regained it. I had to buy new, bigger clothes, then new smaller clothes.

    I just pack both sets away and take them out if I need them. Nobody's feelings but my own get hurt in the process.
  • mjm6190
    mjm6190 Posts: 2 Member
    I think it depends on your friend(s). I've been given almost an entire wardrobe from a friend who's losing weight... AND I am not at all offended by her donation to my closet. Maybe it's just because I care more about clothes than my dignity :bigsmile:
  • Nemis7
    Nemis7 Posts: 1 Member
    Personally I Do Not Think It Rude...There Are Numerous Ideas One Could Do... But Here Are ( 2 ) Things You Could Do...First You Could Donate It To The Church ( Where They Will Give It To People In Need, Who Will Appreciate It ), or Second, You Could Sell It To A Used Clothes Outlet ( Like Buffalo Exchange In NYC On 26 Street )...You May Not Get A Lot But You Will Have Some Spending Cash... Food For Thought. Either Way, Know This... Your Life is Better As You Move On To A Healthy Level As You Shed Your Old Weight, To A Better Life & Outlook, In Life As You Move Forward. Just Saying... :)
  • ObtainingBalance
    ObtainingBalance Posts: 1,446 Member
    Personally I Do Not Think It Rude...There Are Numerous Ideas One Could Do... But Here Are ( 2 ) Things You Could Do...First You Could Donate It To The Church ( Where They Will Give It To People In Need, Who Will Appreciate It ), or Second, You Could Sell It To A Used Clothes Outlet ( Like Buffalo Exchange In NYC On 26 Street )...You May Not Get A Lot But You Will Have Some Spending Cash... Food For Thought. Either Way, Know This... Your Life is Better As You Move On To A Healthy Level As You Shed Your Old Weight, To A Better Life & Outlook, In Life As You Move Forward. Just Saying... :)

    Why do some people capitalize every word in a sentence?
  • iamabutterflychaser
    iamabutterflychaser Posts: 35 Member
    I think the key thing here is that you've borrowed clothes from each other and exchanged in the past. So it would not be out of the ordinary for you to say, "hey, I'm donating these clothes, but do you want to take a look and see if you want anything first?". Any time I ever donate any clothes to goodwill (whether it's because it's too big or I just don't wear it) I always run the items past my sisters or my friends. If something is practically brand new, I would rather see it go to a good home than to donate. My family members and friends also do not spend a lot of money on themselves and clothing (and neither do I), so I know they would appreciate the free clothes.

    Also, I'm sure your friend is not oblivious to the fact that she is a certain size. I'm sure she's aware that you are smaller than her and that she has stayed the same size. It would only be offensive to me if someone offered me clothes that were too BIG for me (implying that they thought I was larger than I am). More often than not, I have been offered clothes that are too small. I don't think I have ever been on the receiving end of "fat" clothes - unless you count the bags and bags of clothes that my shopaholic aunt offers to me, my mom and my sisters each year (she yo yos and there is a very large variation in sizes), but I do not take offense to that.

    As many other posters have commented, it's all in the way you present it. I have donated/given away many a clothing item that still fit me but I just didn't like for whatever reason. Why does this have to be so different?
  • CrazyTrackLady
    CrazyTrackLady Posts: 1,337 Member
    Personally I Do Not Think It Rude...There Are Numerous Ideas One Could Do... But Here Are ( 2 ) Things You Could Do...First You Could Donate It To The Church ( Where They Will Give It To People In Need, Who Will Appreciate It ), or Second, You Could Sell It To A Used Clothes Outlet ( Like Buffalo Exchange In NYC On 26 Street )...You May Not Get A Lot But You Will Have Some Spending Cash... Food For Thought. Either Way, Know This... Your Life is Better As You Move On To A Healthy Level As You Shed Your Old Weight, To A Better Life & Outlook, In Life As You Move Forward. Just Saying... :)

    Why do some people capitalize every word in a sentence?

    I dunno -- and I don't think I could do this if I tried -- too much effort and thought required.
  • IslandDreamer64
    IslandDreamer64 Posts: 258 Member
    I have a very good friend who is always over the moon with excitement when I have clothes to give her. She really can't afford to buy much for herself, and even if she only uses a few of the things I give her I know I've done a good deed. However, I also give things to Goodwill if I don't think they're good enough for my friend.
  • leah07598
    leah07598 Posts: 6 Member
    Honestly I don't think it's rude. I have received clothes from friends that no longer fit them. I just appreciate what I get, as I'm on a very fixed income and don't have the money for new clothes, and I've never taken it as an insult. If she's a good friend, she'll know you mean well, and you aren't trying to insult her.
  • RatherBeInTheShire
    RatherBeInTheShire Posts: 561 Member
    Depends on how it's worded. Someone I know said "i've clothes that are WAYY to big now.. *looks at me* they are about YOUR size, want them?" I was offended by that. I took them, but never wore them when I saw her, because it sucked being in HER fat clothes. ya know? NOW, I just say "no thanks"
  • kluvit
    kluvit Posts: 435 Member
    No, I have a friend who was losing weight at the same time, but she started bigger (and taller) than I am. She needed temporary clothes on her way down, and she was proud to be able to wear my "fat" pants, and even bragged to our mutual friends.
  • tiggerhammon
    tiggerhammon Posts: 2,211 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.

    HOw did the dude on the thread hve the best idea? lol ;)
    [/quote]

    Right! This is definitely the best idea. Even if she wouldn't be offended by a straight up offer, she might just take them all, feeling guilty by saying she only wants certain ones. If she is helping sort them, and you tell her she is free to take what she wants she will be able to pick and choose and not feel bad about it.
  • tiggerhammon
    tiggerhammon Posts: 2,211 Member
    Me personally though, I would keep them. You never know when they will come in handy. I used my fat clothes as maternity clothes instead of buying maternity clothes (they are expensive.)
  • cobes24
    cobes24 Posts: 132 Member
    I LOVE free stuff and I would totally not be offended if someone offered me their fat clothes. I'm also pretty much offended by nothing, so there's that. If she's super sensitive maybe it would be a deal, but most people love free stuff--not to mention, if you've known each other that long, she should know it's coming from a good place.
  • Tabytha13
    Tabytha13 Posts: 23 Member
    I've been on the receiving end my best friend lost loads of weight on "Lighter Life" and asked me if I wanted any of her clothes? I said yes and she came over with 3 bin bags full & I had so much fun going through them....

    I've also passed on clothes that had been bought for me but weren't my style....
  • pamklass
    pamklass Posts: 17
    Every time I have been offered someone's "fat clothes" I have been either the same size or smaller than them. So yeah, I found it kinda insulting that they thought I was bigger than them. But I have also had friends ask for mine before. Although now I learnt to hold on to my big clothes because I learnt that giving them away doesn't mean I will make sure I dont end up that size again.
  • ObtainingBalance
    ObtainingBalance Posts: 1,446 Member
    Personally I Do Not Think It Rude...There Are Numerous Ideas One Could Do... But Here Are ( 2 ) Things You Could Do...First You Could Donate It To The Church ( Where They Will Give It To People In Need, Who Will Appreciate It ), or Second, You Could Sell It To A Used Clothes Outlet ( Like Buffalo Exchange In NYC On 26 Street )...You May Not Get A Lot But You Will Have Some Spending Cash... Food For Thought. Either Way, Know This... Your Life is Better As You Move On To A Healthy Level As You Shed Your Old Weight, To A Better Life & Outlook, In Life As You Move Forward. Just Saying... :)

    Why do some people capitalize every word in a sentence?

    I dunno -- and I don't think I could do this if I tried -- too much effort and thought required.

    Haha I know, right...
  • jlapey
    jlapey Posts: 1,850 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.

    BEST ANSWER AWARD!!!!

    YES! or just tell her you have some good clothes you no longer wear and ask if she "knows anyone who might want them". Then it will be up to her to decide if she wants them for herself or not.
  • LizardQueen4PointOh
    LizardQueen4PointOh Posts: 245 Member
    I didn't read all the responses - sorry.

    If you have to ask the question, then you already know the answer.

    If I were your friend, I would have no issue. If I think about it, the majority of my wardrobe has been donated to me from my sister, more than one friend/co-worker, a childhood friend, you name it. I also hate shopping for clothes for myself, so that may have something to do with it.
  • kowfred
    kowfred Posts: 19
    I wouldn't offer unless they've commented they like something. They might think you're bragging. But you should. Keep it up, you look great! :)
  • kowfred
    kowfred Posts: 19
    I know all about family hand me downs. How long have you been on my fitness pal? keep up the good work!
  • ellaloveslove
    ellaloveslove Posts: 166 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.

    Ooo good idea!
  • Jewelsfla
    Jewelsfla Posts: 41 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.


    This is a really good idea!
  • DesDawn24
    DesDawn24 Posts: 147 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.

    Love this idea! It's totally casual and shouldn't embarass your friend in any way.
  • becky6m
    becky6m Posts: 108 Member
    Nope, I do it all the time. I also have been given clothes that were to small/big, I didn't take it to heart.
  • skyekeeper
    skyekeeper Posts: 286 Member
    I had tons of clothes and everyone was just begging me for them so I never had that issue! Good luck!

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