Is it RUDE to offer your "fat clothes" to a friend?

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Replies

  • meaningful99
    meaningful99 Posts: 174
    Yes. Give them to Good Will.
  • BrandiBoo84
    BrandiBoo84 Posts: 110 Member
    I dont think so, in my circle it wouldnt be anyway. My best gals and I all know were different and we're all also comfortable with who we are for the most part. I have a tiny friend that just lost some weight and she gave me her 'fat' clothes. Didnt bother me one bit because hey, they fit perf and she IS smaller than me so who cares. Im a realist ;)
  • dogetta
    dogetta Posts: 61 Member
    SO, I've dropped a couple sizes and now have quite a few clothing items that are just way too big to wear and have look good on me. That being said, these clothes are all super cute and have lots of life left in them. So, do y'all think it's rude if I offer them to a friend who would look really cute in them? What I would think, is that it would all really be in how you word the offer. More of a: hey I've got a couple adorable dresses I don't wear anymore, would you want them INSTEAD OF A These are WAY too big on me...I bet they'd fit you :laugh: Obviously that's not what I'm trying to say. But even if you say it in a completely non- demeaning way - is it still rude?


    Just something to add: I've known here since I was about 5, and we've been sharing/borrowing clothes sine about age 13. But I'm worried it's different to actually give her things because they don't fit - not just because I dont want them anymore
    I am doing some spring cleaning do you want any of these if not i'll donate them to.....
  • usflygirl55
    usflygirl55 Posts: 277 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.

    I love this idea! It works well and gives her the opportunity to speak up if she wants anything.
  • treineck
    treineck Posts: 103 Member
    I think that just the fact that you are wondering yourself how this would be perceived by her shows that somewhere in the back of your mind you have a notion that her feelings would be hurt. Listen to your instincts!
  • penrbrown
    penrbrown Posts: 2,685 Member
    Send your clothes to me.

    Problem solved.
  • SteelySunshine
    SteelySunshine Posts: 1,092 Member
    In about 2 sizes maybe sooner since I have already lost at least one possibly 2, I will be begging people for their fat clothes. Seriously, my middle daughter is losing weight, she wasn't as big as I was. But, I am getting down to her heaviest weight and I would be incredibly hurt if she didn't offer me her clothes. I think it's possible that a friend would be hurt as well if this is a tradition between them. It would be like "Wtf, you don't want to let me have your clothes anymore?" That being said do the give away in as gentle a manner as possible. Maybe over a healthy lunch to model the behavior that got you losing weight.
  • KettleTO
    KettleTO Posts: 144 Member
    I had some expensive European bras that I shrank out off quickly. I took a friend to get properly fitted at a bra store. Turn out she was the size that I had barely worn before shrinking out of them. I offered them to her saying that I'd totally understand if that was too weird, gross, whatever. If she was willing I'd rather save her the money than donate them to Value Village. She took almost all of them. She had never had good quality, properly fitting bras before. We work together and she will periodically tell me which one she's wearing.

    Not everyone is so open.

    I also gave someone else at work clothes that I bought before hoping to get into and didn't (she was smaller). When I got down to the size of the clothes last spring she asked if I wanted them back....I took one sweater that she thought was too warm to wear.
  • arcticfox04
    arcticfox04 Posts: 1,011 Member
    I just donate to charity.
  • onwarddownward
    onwarddownward Posts: 1,683 Member
    Whatever you decide to do, keep 1 pair of big pants to remind yourself not to go backward. I might say, "Hey, I've got some cute outfits, do you want to look through them or what do you think I should with them?"

    That way,it's her call. She already knows you're losing weight. But ask yourself this: do you want her to have them or do you want your best friend to acknowledge your progress?

    If its for recognition, that's completely fine, we all want them to notice. But skip the giveaway. Just let them go to a donation site. I'm very proud of your success! I can't wait to drop a size or two.

    Jan
  • KimberlyinMN
    KimberlyinMN Posts: 302 Member
    SO, I've dropped a couple sizes and now have quite a few clothing items that are just way too big to wear and have look good on me. That being said, these clothes are all super cute and have lots of life left in them. So, do y'all think it's rude if I offer them to a friend who would look really cute in them? What I would think, is that it would all really be in how you word the offer. More of a: hey I've got a couple adorable dresses I don't wear anymore, would you want them INSTEAD OF A These are WAY too big on me...I bet they'd fit you :laugh: Obviously that's not what I'm trying to say. But even if you say it in a completely non- demeaning way - is it still rude?

    I haven't read the other posts but I'd like to say that I wouldn't think this is rude. Well, maybe if you say "Hey, do you want my fat clothes? I think they'd fit you."

    I recently had a co-worker who asked me after a meeting if she could buy my shirt when it got too big. Seriously! I told her she could have it and that I had some other stuff if she wanted it. She told me that she had some smaller sizes that I could have if I wanted them (she'd gained some weight back but she was comfortable at the size she currently is).

    I brought her a few bags of clothes the next week, including the shirt she had asked me about. (It was really too big for me when I was wearing it anyhow.) And I brought her another bag a couple of weeks after that. She brought me a big bag of jeans that will be my next size to get into. :) It was a win-win for both of us! (I've just been donating my clothes anyhow, so why not give it to someone who wants it?)
  • Songbirdcw
    Songbirdcw Posts: 320 Member
    I actually had people waiting for me to get to skinny for my clothes. I wish they didn't actually. I want to hold on to them a little longer and just get a nice belt. I don't see that as being rude. It's charity!
  • fluffysexyme
    fluffysexyme Posts: 104 Member
    My then bff had gb and once she dropped about 100 lbs and I went to visit. She said to me " I'm getting rid of my clothes. If there's anything you want get it now or it's going to goodwill."

    short, sweet and to the point.
  • b7bbs
    b7bbs Posts: 158 Member
    Bring your friend over to help you "sort your donation clothes". If she is interested then she will ask to take the ones she likes. It is a non-confrontational way to let her choose if she wants them.

    I think this is a great idea.
  • Sparlingo
    Sparlingo Posts: 938 Member
    I've been the grateful recipient of shrunk-out-of clothes. I would be choked if a fashionable friend donated a bunch of cute clothes in my size -- I'm broke! Gimme the clothes :smile:!

    She'll see your heart and intentions, and if she does, for whatever reason, get offended - that's about her, not about you (unless you were rude/uncaring in the way you offered them).
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
    Personally I Do Not Think It Rude...There Are Numerous Ideas One Could Do... But Here Are ( 2 ) Things You Could Do...First You Could Donate It To The Church ( Where They Will Give It To People In Need, Who Will Appreciate It ), or Second, You Could Sell It To A Used Clothes Outlet ( Like Buffalo Exchange In NYC On 26 Street )...You May Not Get A Lot But You Will Have Some Spending Cash... Food For Thought. Either Way, Know This... Your Life is Better As You Move On To A Healthy Level As You Shed Your Old Weight, To A Better Life & Outlook, In Life As You Move Forward. Just Saying... :)

    Why do some people capitalize every word in a sentence?

    I dunno -- and I don't think I could do this if I tried -- too much effort and thought required.

    Haha I know, right...

    It's a software thing. The person typed in ALL CAPS and either their Word program or this forum converted it to just capitalized first letters. But yeah, doing it on purpose would be a lot of hitting that shift button!

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