Ideas for *witty* responses to healthy haters

135

Replies

  • Crochetluvr
    Crochetluvr Posts: 3,280 Member
    When I first started my weight loss and weighed my food, my b/f would ask the sarcastic question, "Did you WEIGH that?" And I would just say yes. But now, he asks very seriously, "Did you weigh your food?".....because he now sees the results of all my efforts and hard work....and he likes it.

    Other people are just jealous.....feel sorry for them. :)
  • HollisGrant
    HollisGrant Posts: 2,022 Member
    I admit I have no witty responses to offer. However, I am fascinated that your relative said she could "see roots" on brussels sprouts. Clearly she has never seen them growing - they grow off of a stalk, "roots" are an impossibility. Take your relative to a farm for goodness sake, maybe she would appreciate her veggies more. :)

    LOL!
  • HollisGrant
    HollisGrant Posts: 2,022 Member
    Bump!!

    Telling my cousin this is a lifestlye change when she insists I'm on a "diet" because I refuse junk food sometimes, just doesn't seem to work :explode:

    ideas..? haha

    Ask her, "How is your diet going?"
  • zanne54
    zanne54 Posts: 336 Member
    Haven't read the responses yet so I don't forget my comeback.

    "Ya? I can see yours too. Maybe you should book a hair appointment soon."
  • Katla49
    Katla49 Posts: 10,385 Member
    "I eat this because I like it and I like how I feel when I'm done." Simple, and true.
  • jljshoe1979
    jljshoe1979 Posts: 325 Member
    I try to eat healthy...I even like it (most of the time). About a year ago, my mom (who has a weight problem with diabetes and some heart trouble) turned to my brother (who has a weight problem and trying to lose) and said my husband and I were "health nuts." Which is very, very far from the truth...now, my husband and I just laugh about it. My mom has also told me I'm lucky because I don't have a weight problem (I'm about 15-20 lbs over the range I would like to be in, so you can judge that for yourself)...I don't think I'm lucky - I think I'm diligent in having a healthy lifestyle.

    As far as the Brussels sprouts comment, I would say: "Thanks for your concern" and keep eating. OR "Oh yeah, the roots, that's the best part." For other possible comments made in the future, finding a way to agree with the person (even if you don't) will usually shut people up...if they keep going, just ask them why they won't let it go, you already agreed with them.
  • bearkisses
    bearkisses Posts: 1,252 Member
    hmm, maybe something like, "I prefer healthy vegetables to things like chips, especially the one on your shoulder"

    burn!
  • TheBigYin
    TheBigYin Posts: 5,686 Member
    Not witty in the slightest, but I tend to go with "*kitten* off and let me eat my dinner in peace"
  • disasterman
    disasterman Posts: 746 Member
    Hey, don't yuck my yumm.
  • lilRicki
    lilRicki Posts: 4,555 Member
    I just look them right in the eye and say "are you eating it?" if they say "no" you reply with "exactly"...my parents always said to keep my eyes on my own plate.
  • Armyantzzz
    Armyantzzz Posts: 214 Member
    When people give you negativity.... try responding with "Thank you for sharing".... when they question as to what you mean by that... respond with " I just wanted to thank you for caring enough about me to be honest"...

    It works for me!:laugh: :laugh:
  • tuckerrj
    tuckerrj Posts: 1,453 Member
    "I like food that gives me energy and good moods, not complete junk that's going to give me bad skin and a fat *kitten*!"

    You got it. It would go like this," Hey! If I ever want bad skin and a fat azz, I'll eat whatever YOU'RE eating!!!"
  • run_way
    run_way Posts: 220
    Just say "well you may have achieved your health goals, but I am still working on mine."

    This works both ways because it shows you're making healthy decisions to an average person and doesn't mean anything more... and works as a very sarcastic remark if they are significantly larger and/or out of shape than you are. Not that I would actually ever say these things to someone, generally I'm just silent, give them a little grin and walk away. Some fun suggestions to imagine saying, though :flowerforyou:
  • Jokenmit
    Jokenmit Posts: 80 Member
    just before you pop another veggie in your mouth just blandly ask them how that cow tastes.
  • korgale
    korgale Posts: 3
    Mind F**k that b*tch!!!!! Look her in the eye and say, "Everything I do, I do for the Devil."
  • RadioactivePirate
    RadioactivePirate Posts: 212
    I just say "Hey, I don't pick on your ice cream [or whatever their favorite unhealthy food is], leave my veggies alone."

    Not particularly witty but it gets the point across.
  • ajmiller1987
    ajmiller1987 Posts: 48 Member
    Tell them you have a health problem that means you have to eat healthy foods.

    When they ask what it is that's wrong with you, tell them it's called not being a fat *kitten*.
  • vixtris
    vixtris Posts: 688 Member
    Tell them you have a health problem that means you have to eat healthy foods.

    When they ask what it is that's wrong with you, tell them it's called not being a fat *kitten*.
    ok ... I actually laughed at that one.
  • gmallan
    gmallan Posts: 2,099 Member
    You could just ask them "so, what are you having for lunch?" No doubt it'll be something stupidly calorie laden and by turning the conversation back around onto them they may realise how much better your choice is.
  • UrnAsh
    UrnAsh Posts: 207 Member
    "broccoli gets stuck in your teeth, french fries get stuck on your *kitten*"

    Ha!
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,988 Member
    Ironically I eat 80/20 so when someone sees me eating some chips for example and makes a food statement, I just flex the biceps and say "Let me know when you want to go to the gun show". But the same tactic works both ways.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
  • auroranflash
    auroranflash Posts: 3,569 Member
    Start mentioning in detail how much healthier eating has helped with your recent bowel malfunctions. They will eventually leave, especially if they're trying to eat, too.
  • Jerrypeoples
    Jerrypeoples Posts: 1,541 Member
    "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels"

    I've seen that 'mantra' of far too many pro-ana sites for it to do anything but make me uncomfortable.

    Yeah... "Nothing tastes as good as healthy feels." Is better :flowerforyou:



    I just had to look up pro-ana is. Wowsers.

    I was looking at this from a will-power perspective, not a don't eat perspective.

    Sorry a double whopper with cheeses no tomato is heaven on earth. Don't kid yourself!
  • rebamay87
    rebamay87 Posts: 103 Member
    I say this to my 4 and 5 year old students in class.. and granted I think it sadly applies to adults.

    They comment on my food.. which normally consists of "Ewww... I HATE LETTUCE!" and without skipping a beat I smile brightly pick up my fork and say

    "Oh? Well good thing this is my lunch, I didn't offer any to you.."

    They normally look a little startled but they're learning not only to not comment on my food but their peers either.
  • cindyhoney2
    cindyhoney2 Posts: 603 Member
    I get picked on for my 'healthy water' (I put cucumbers in my water for a flavor change) I have tried lemons/limes, mixed melons. I like them all. So my co-worker says "so what are you drinking today" I said "just plain water today" she just rolls her eyes and says "you and your heath kicks". Keep in mind she's 23 and I'm 40 and she keeps complaining about losing the 15 lbs she has put on since starting this job (we sit on our butts all day). I've lost almost 15 since I started in December, lol. I used to think my sister went a little over board when she'd bring her own food to b-day parties and such, now I do it too. I usually just have mental thoughts that I fight to keep to myself, lol, sometimes w/more success than other times. The haters will probably still be wearing that extra weight when they get the hell over it!
  • flexdirectcpr
    flexdirectcpr Posts: 103 Member
    Don't yuck my yum.
  • chasetwins
    chasetwins Posts: 702 Member
    hmm, maybe something like, "I prefer healthy vegetables to things like chips, especially the one on your shoulder"
    I let out an audible 'ooooohh'.
    This right here is a good one lol

    haha me too!!
  • SleeplessinBerlin
    SleeplessinBerlin Posts: 513 Member
    Some years ago, during my clinical traineeship in my home town, I heard a remark I had no chance of replying to.

    We had a breakfast break and I was eating a sweet roll. This kind of sweet rolls are only available in my home country therefore I enjoy eating them once in a while when I'm visiting.
    One of the doctors, a woman who apparently disliked me just for being young and successful I guess (she claimed I went to med school in Germany because my parents were rich - which was a total nonsense) noticed: I guess you are a fan of sweet rolls.
    - well, I like them, they remind me of my childhood are we don't have them in Germany, I replied.
    - yeah, but they make hips bigger, she said on the way out and left leaving me no time to reply.

    During a conversation with my father in law I told him the story and he instantly replied: I would've said: if they made brains bigger, I'd gladly recommend them to you.

    I loved that.
  • wickedwendy6
    wickedwendy6 Posts: 117 Member
    I think the best response is not to be witty but just to ask "What's it to you what I eat? Do you want me to monitor and remark on what YOU eat?"

    This puts them in your shoes so they know what it feels like to be interrogated about what you eat, it may also make them ponder why they did actually remark and also puts the ball in their court - if they continue to remark on what you're eating then they can expect a similar remark about the crap they're eating in return.

    Don't get me wrong, I think that being witty is fun but sometimes doesn't get the point across.
  • ghhosstt
    ghhosstt Posts: 112
    Just say "well you may have achieved your health goals, but I am still working on mine."

    This works both ways because it shows you're making healthy decisions to an average person and doesn't mean anything more... and works as a very sarcastic remark if they are significantly larger and/or out of shape than you are. Not that I would actually ever say these things to someone, generally I'm just silent, give them a little grin and walk away. Some fun suggestions to imagine saying, though :flowerforyou:

    this is very very clever, I like it. It's subtle and the person in question couldn't blame you for being insulting without having to admit to their unhealthy habits. :)

Categories