pregnancy doesn't "ruin" your body...
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And how old are you?
Your shape doesn't bounce back at 40 the way it does at 30 or 20. You young people think everyone has, or should have, the exact same experience as you. When you have more experience you will find that isn't true.0 -
Pregnancy did ruin my body, Im very proud of both of my children but yes they DID ruin my body. No i didnt gain masses of weight but i had Obstetric Cholestasis, to the point both children were induced premature due to my liver actually starting to fail. The liver unable to cope with the bile etc causing me to scratch my self raw legs feet arms tummy back neck, u name it I have a scar on that part of my body threw scratching. Iam riddles with these hideous scar's.
My belly was like a deflated balloon for all of about a week when it snapped back, over the year's threw my own fault i have gained a "pouch" but im working on that.0 -
DAMN! that's some scary stuff.Pregnancy did ruin my body, Im very proud of both of my children but yes they DID ruin my body. No i didnt gain masses of weight but i had Obstetric Cholestasis, to the point both children were induced premature due to my liver actually starting to fail. The liver unable to cope with the bile etc causing me to scratch my self raw legs feet arms tummy back neck, u name it I have a scar on that part of my body threw scratching. Iam riddles with these hideous scar's.
My belly was like a deflated balloon for all of about a week when it snapped back, over the year's threw my own fault i have gained a "pouch" but im working on that.0 -
OP you look amazing!
Super incredible amazing!
Reading the first page of comments was a little surprising. I was expecting to read "Holy crap you look phenomenal!" but instead I saw people who just assume you're "lucky." Kind of discredits all the hard work that you've obviously put into your body. Anyways, I digress.
You're abs are rockin, and I'm going to get mine in the same shape as yours are. Pregnancy didn't ruin your body, and it sure as hell didn't ruin mine, either. :flowerforyou:
Nobody is saying she didn't work hard - I'm sure she did. But the implication was that everyone could do it if only they worked as hard as she did, and that somehow anyone who does have a less than perfect post-baby body only has themselves to blame because they didn't work hard enough. No amount of working hard will shift stretch marks on your belly and thighs or re-glue split muscles. I don't think my body is 'ruined' but it does affect what I can and can't wear and makes me supremely self concious when I go swimming. I certainly don't want to think that the fit women around me at the pool/ beach are thinking that I'm some kind of slob.
I just think it's interesting that nobody asked her what her diet breakdown looked like, or what kind of training she did to get back in shape. She received a lot of comments saying it is because she's young or has good genetics and I think that takes away from the fact that she worked hard before, during, and after her pregnancy. And admittedly, I didn't read every page because the thread started to get negative really fast, I made an observation about the first few pages.
And I'm not getting started on the semantics of the OP, people can infer whatever they want to out of it. I didn't take offence to anything. The intention of my post was to tell the OP she looks great and I'm going to have awesome abs like her, too.0 -
This is such a naive and wildly inaccurate statement - its like comparing yourself to people like Victoria Beckham or any other celeb - no wonder mums have such an unrealistic exceptions after birth like life just falls back into place!!
For one the OP could have endless 'free time', partner willing to babysit, no job, a perfect baby, perfect home, other children, good family support, no PND or any PTSD!!!!
This may be the OPs experience but wonder if on her 2nd child she could throw such a silly wild statement.
Prenatal you are prob working all the hours under the sun then all of a sudden handed this new human thats demanding and wholly encompasses your life! For one I didnt have any free time - I am married to a farmer and we have a number of other enterprises that at the time after DS1 birth I had to get back to. There was no going missing for hours or the wonderful family help that so many people are lucky to have. Not forgetting the miserable exhaustion when the OH isnt willing/cant help with.
I too have two C-sections with floppy belly, suffered from terrible traumatic birth depression after DS2 and only now at 4 yrs old I have more time to focus on myself. Because I did think that the children came first and find the work/family/fitness not an excuse not to exercise but its physically impossible. Perhaps the OP should consider putting her feet in some one elses shoes before thinking that everyone is the same !0 -
Congrats on your body. I could only dream mine had done that.
Before pregnancy at age 21, delivered my 9 pound daughter at age 22, I was in the US Navy and weighed 142 pounds at 5'7" tall.
During the pregnancy I had bad edema (swelling issues) Coupled with severe morning sickness. I dehydrated twice in the first 3 months and lost 14 pounds. When the morning sickness stopped, the swelling set in and did not stop.
At delivery by c-section I weighed 245 pounds. 2 days after delivery I weighed 167. Yep 78 pounds of fluid and baby.
I have craters they call stretch marks from my belly button to my upper thighs, in my calves and on the top of my feet. At the 8.5 month mark of being pregnant my belly button split open requiring stitches. That was fun, let me tell ya.
It was an emergency c-section too. They started cutting before the epidural kicked in completely. I cried for 9 months straight while pregnant with my 2nd and last child, out of fear that what happened with the first would happen again.
So my experience was yes it does and did ruin my body.
When anyone sees my lower stomach, if I am smaller the first thing I am usually asked even by doctors is how did I get burned that badly on my stomach. It truly looks like a healed serious skin graft required burning by acid rivulets run down my stomach. Or melted candle wax, take your pick of metaphors.
I envy you. I really do.
Currently I am saving up for plastic surgery to have the damage fixed. Unfortunately I will always be stuck with stretch marks on my feet., my calves and my thighs. Surgery can only fix so much and there is only so much I can save to pay for, priority one to be fixed is the stomach. They sewed me back up funny, so it is sort of curtain valanced swag style in the lastest fashion of acid burn marks.
You can't control gaining 78 pounds of fluid.0 -
I just think it's interesting that nobody asked her what her diet breakdown looked like, or what kind of training she did to get back in shape. She received a lot of comments saying it is because she's young or has good genetics and I think that takes away from the fact that she worked hard before, during, and after her pregnancy. And admittedly, I didn't read every page because the thread started to get negative really fast, I made an observation about the first few pages.
And I'm not getting started on the semantics of the OP, people can infer whatever they want to out of it. I didn't take offence to anything. The intention of my post was to tell the OP she looks great and I'm going to have awesome abs like her, too.
Unfortunately, I read through all 15 pages of the negativity and you are absolutely right!0 -
I don't understand why people need to turn pregnancy topics into a "who had it worse" competition. No one should need to share the difficulties they have faced in their lives and pregnancies. The Op was sharing her experience. I think it is positive for young people to not see pregnancy as something that "ruins" a body. It will change it, but doesn't have to be seen as "ruining". Getting older will also change a person's body. Of course some people do bounce back better than other people, and certainly that can be due to age, but on the flip side older mothers had a longer time to enjoy a pre-pregnancy body, so the need to not feel ruined may not be as high for them. And just because a body bounces back well, that does not mean they have not suffered in life or that they had an easy breezy pregnancy, they may have even encountered terrifying medical circumstances (that don't need to be discussed). And some people do feel their body was ruined. Not everyone feels that their body was ruined and not everyone felt that kind of message was helpful to encounter. My body was not ruined by pregnancy, and I do not want the prevailing consensus to be that pregnancy ruins the female body. That's my personal opinion and feelings.0
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I said the same thing a few weeks ago....... my topic got deleted. I didn't ready any replies & I was told later on that they were nasty.
This one seems to have gone the same way.
I love the 'perfect' comeback from those who just can't handle another opinion different to them.0 -
And how old are you?
Your shape doesn't bounce back at 40 the way it does at 30 or 20. You young people think everyone has, or should have, the exact same experience as you. When you have more experience you will find that isn't true.
Really? I had my son at 18, he is now 19 & that makes me 38 in a few weeks so that's closer to 40.... my body bounced back easily. In fact it came back better. I only started last year & only been at it for 7 months when I hit goal, and that was under what I was before I had my son. 18 months in total & you would now not know I'd had a child.
Doesn't bounce back. :laugh: That's the excuse people use when they want an excuse for slacking off.0 -
I said the same thing a few weeks ago....... my topic got deleted. I didn't ready any replies & I was told later on that they were nasty.
This one seems to have gone the same way.
I love the 'perfect' comeback from those who just can't handle another opinion different to them.
My reply to you was to inform you on the weight gain distribution of pregnancy because you were misinformed about weight gain. You thought the weight was 8 pounds for a baby and 1 pound for the rest. That is not correct.
Baby – 7½ pounds
Enlargement of uterus – 2 pounds
Placenta – 1½ pounds
Amniotic fluid – 2 pounds
Breast enlargement – 2 pounds
Extra blood and fluid volume – 8 pounds
Extra fat stores – 7 pounds
Total – 30 pounds
Now, this will vary a lot per women (as is pretty obvious).0 -
That's probably more to do with age than baby. I had a baby at 17 and snapped back into shape without even trying (after gaining 55 pounds in three months at the end). I have not had any more children, but I'm now in my mid-30s and struggling.it definitely alters your body and your metabolism. i know that after having my daughter and being in my mid-30s, my metabolism has changed (slowed down). i've had to change the way i workout and be very disciplined with my food in order to see results. it's def not as easy to lose weight as it was when i was younger.0 -
I do not look at the permanent physical changes that pregnancy branded my body with as ruination. It is a gift of the female species, a bodily bagde of honor to have carried and given life to a child. For those of us fortunate enough to have had children, there are many infertile women out there who would gladly accept stretch marks and belly pooches for the chance to give birth to a child. Some women who obsess on the effects on their body are almost narcissistic. Focus more on bringing up your children to live happy healthy lives and learn that the world is diverse. and that not everyone is physically perfect but happiness can abound. Happy Mothers Day to all.:flowerforyou:0
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And how old are you?
Your shape doesn't bounce back at 40 the way it does at 30 or 20. You young people think everyone has, or should have, the exact same experience as you. When you have more experience you will find that isn't true.
Really? I had my son at 18, he is now 19 & that makes me 38 in a few weeks so that's closer to 40.... my body bounced back easily. In fact it came back better. I only started last year & only been at it for 7 months when I hit goal, and that was under what I was before I had my son. 18 months in total & you would now not know I'd had a child.
Doesn't bounce back. :laugh: That's the excuse people use when they want an excuse for slacking off.
This post and posts like it are the problem with OP's thread. Comparing yourself, your life, your body to women who you don't know. People are getting "negative" and upset at comments like this because there are people (like myself) who work very hard and while my body is stronger and smaller (21%BF smaller), I still have sagging skin. My body hasn't bounced back in that regards but thanks for assuming I slack off. I know I haven't. I feel incredibly sorry for you.0 -
you're absolutely right. and if the OP had phrased things honestly and accurately, as you did, this whole drama would never have happened.hoping to give some people hope that they could work to get their bodies back - and no, not a perfect pre-pregnancy body necessarily, but stating that pregnancy doesn't HAVE to completely RUIN your body, because in MOST cases, it really doesn't have to. Too many women DO use it as an excuse, imo.
Agreed. But, also, if people didn't focus so much on wording and took the gist of what she said instead. I know that's a lot to expect out of people in general, and I don't personally expect it. I think the OP expected too much out of people, though. Wording makes a big difference, for sure. It's just one of those things where something gets taken the wrong way and a mob of people runs with it. I think wars have probably been started on more than one occasion due to a misunderstanding... lol
I think OP "meant" well but like you said expected too much out of people she doesn't know (and who has time to do that as a Mom anyway?) I also think if OP wished to truly inspire, the success stories section of the forum would have been appropriate. I just wish the thread would disappear already. Too much negativity.0 -
Your body didn't "bounce back" and your son is an adult now. It's not like you JUST had him.And how old are you?
Your shape doesn't bounce back at 40 the way it does at 30 or 20. You young people think everyone has, or should have, the exact same experience as you. When you have more experience you will find that isn't true.
Really? I had my son at 18, he is now 19 & that makes me 38 in a few weeks so that's closer to 40.... my body bounced back easily. In fact it came back better. I only started last year & only been at it for 7 months when I hit goal, and that was under what I was before I had my son. 18 months in total & you would now not know I'd had a child.
Doesn't bounce back. :laugh: That's the excuse people use when they want an excuse for slacking off.
"Bouncing back" implies you didn't work for it or that it happened very quickly (seven months is a decent amount of time). My 17-year-old body DID bounce back. I didn't do anything special. I didn't diet and I didn't do any deliberate exercise and I lost all my weight and was back in my old clothes within a few months.
But at 36, without having had a child recently, I'm having a hell of a time just not gaining weight, even when I work out like crazy and watch everything I put in my mouth.
Everyone is different, FYI.0 -
^Not in her world, everyone is a carbon copy :laugh: :laugh:0
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I gained 50 lbs and i never got a single stretch mark. My books changed, but my belly bounced back fine.
Congrats to u.0 -
My body hasn't bounced back in that regards but thanks for assuming I slack off. I know I haven't.
Yeah I do agree with this. Why make someone feel bad about the natural process of their body from having a baby!! There are so many reasons why things happen differently for different people. And women should not have to feel bad about that. I think the Op could have shared this without implying that others let themselves go (or whatever).0 -
I clicked on this thread hoping to hear that all my fears were unfounded, but after the OP, it seems like pregnancy really is going to mess with my body in ways I won't like. Oh well, I'm sure if I ever do have kids, they'll be worth the damage!0
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by "let yourself go", believe it or not i didn't mean 'end up looking like anything other than me'. hahaha. you guys are too funny. I am referring to the women who dont even try. the women who are self described as being "fat", who complain about being overweight/out of shape, the women who HATE their body and yet eat donuts, drink milkshakes, and sit on their *kitten* because they're moms and that what moms do. i have a relative who was pregnant at the same time as i was. we started off the same. same height, same weight. she gained three times as much weight as i did during pregnancy. she said how she was going to 'enjoy' her pregnancy and eat whatever she wanted. i didn't do this. after delivery, she took it easy and still does. i didn't do this. she says things like, "i'd rather have my child and hate my body than love my body and not have my child". i say you can have both: a body you can be proud of AND children. it's not one or the other.
and yes, i realize that individual results may vary. as long as you do the best you can, that's all that matters.
You know a lot of women like this? Or are you making broad, sweeping generalizations....yet again based off ONE person you know who did something different than you did. :noway:
After reading all your responses, you come off as the most whiny person I've seen on here. Seriously,,,after all the crap I've read on here, you might be the worst.0 -
To the OP, you look absolutely amazing!!!! My best friend had a very similar experience. She was in great shape pre-pregnancy, and is now about 20 pounds lighter that her pre-pregnancy weight. She is also a gym rat and has done a couple of rounds of Insanity. Am I extremely jealous of her? Yes!! But, did I work half as hard as she did? Not a chance! She gained a good bit a weight for her pregnancy, but she worked hard after to get it off. Does she take more pride in her body than in her son? Absolutely not!!! I have several other friends who are in great shape and had less than pleasant pregnancies. While every body is not the same, it is not fair to bash someone for being more fortunate. And if you are less than fortunate in the post baby body department, it is not fair to assume that the OP was putting you down for NOT looking like her. She worked hard for her body, and should be proud of it.
There are tons of other threads on here asking to see post baby bellies. I have spoken to so many women over the years that are fearful of what pregnancy would do to their bodies. As they should be! Pregnancy has its benefits as well as risks. You should always be informed and educated in all aspects of it. Yes, you can tear, your abs can separate, you can have bladder problems, hernias, and nerve damage. Yes, you can be left with horrible stretch marks, extra weight, and ZERO bladder control. Or, you can not. While genetics plays a large part of it, so does attitude. As the OP described, I know MANY women who did in fact "let themselves go" while pregnant. They "ate for two," indulged in dessert daily (if not more), ate whatever they wanted, and did not exercise. It is a decision. But making the statement does not mean they she is talking about YOU!!!!! Don't get offended by something just because you feel as though it is inflammatory. I see it as hope. Just is there is a chance that the above mentioned things can happen, there is a chance that they won't.0 -
I clicked on this thread hoping to hear that all my fears were unfounded, but after the OP, it seems like pregnancy really is going to mess with my body in ways I won't like. Oh well, I'm sure if I ever do have kids, they'll be worth the damage!
My body bounced back also. I was back to pre-pregnancy body 7 months after my second baby (I was 29).0 -
I clicked on this thread hoping to hear that all my fears were unfounded, but after the OP, it seems like pregnancy really is going to mess with my body in ways I won't like. Oh well, I'm sure if I ever do have kids, they'll be worth the damage!
Pretty much, how I feel. I was like "whoa , really?!" and then "oh...", lol.0 -
I clicked on this thread hoping to hear that all my fears were unfounded, but after the OP, it seems like pregnancy really is going to mess with my body in ways I won't like. Oh well, I'm sure if I ever do have kids, they'll be worth the damage!
It's possible but not necessarily. I lucked out when it came to my skin, no stretch marks and no saggy skin. I DID gain a lot though, 60lbs, but have lost 37lbs already through hard work (working out at home, no time for gym). I had my baby 3 months ago. So it's not necessarily doom and gloom. And I can say even if I hadn't lucked out, I'd still consider myself lucky to have had my beautiful daughter!0 -
mmmmmmmmmmm you may be upsetting a few mummies here:( i was lucky no stretchies and im 4 kilo away from pre preggo weight. i think i look great0
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Not convinced. Still don't want kids.0
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Wow, some of you negative people need to get over yourselves. I feel sorry for anyone that is so insecure in how they look that they have to bash the op. and don't give me the crap about how your "protecting someone else from false information". It's just another transparent attempt to put someone else down to make yourselves feel better.0
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And how old are you?
Your shape doesn't bounce back at 40 the way it does at 30 or 20. You young people think everyone has, or should have, the exact same experience as you. When you have more experience you will find that isn't true.
Really? I had my son at 18, he is now 19 & that makes me 38 in a few weeks so that's closer to 40.... my body bounced back easily. In fact it came back better. I only started last year & only been at it for 7 months when I hit goal, and that was under what I was before I had my son. 18 months in total & you would now not know I'd had a child.
Doesn't bounce back. :laugh: That's the excuse people use when they want an excuse for slacking off.
This post and posts like it are the problem with OP's thread. Comparing yourself, your life, your body to women who you don't know. People are getting "negative" and upset at comments like this because there are people (like myself) who work very hard and while my body is stronger and smaller (21%BF smaller), I still have sagging skin. My body hasn't bounced back in that regards but thanks for assuming I slack off. I know I haven't. I feel incredibly sorry for you.
I completely agree, comments like this are incredibly degrading to women who work their butt off knowing that their body will never look the same again. Realistically not all women have the genetics to just "bounce back" to their pre pregnancy body. I'm only 24, I only found out I had gestational diabetes coming to the end of my pregnancy and by then my bump was so big there was no way it would just spring back, instead I was left with a "pooch" of fat with wrinkled skin, I've gone from a UK size 14 to a UK size 8, I'm in much better shape but I still have that pooch, there is no saying that I will ever be able to completely get rid of it either..
Please excuse the double belly button that I have been left with :ohwell:0 -
You still look great and lots of women would love to look as good as you do.0
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