HELP! Should I date three more??

I'm sorry, but ............ what?

"...it isn't worth it to me to stay in a relationship where I can't trust someone" <<< I would wholly agree with that statement

"....we have been together two whole months" <<< this is where I started to struggle. Two WHOLE months?!? Wowzer

"I'm 26 and my biological clock is ticking" <<< you're losing me

"....my ex is calling me ......so obviously I need to get out of the San Diego area" <<< nope, you've lost me.

".Anyway, studies show that you should date 12 people before you choose one to settle down with" <<< well, if you read it, it must be true, especially in Wired.

"What if I miss my soul mate?" <<< you're seriously asking these questions and STILL entertaining marrying someone you've been with for two WHOLE months?

"I know the forums get snarky sometimes ..." <<< honest to god, this is the first time I've ever been snarky on any social network or forum in my life, but what did you seriously expect?

You're 26, been with someone for 2 months, have some weird idea of a ticking bio clock at 26, considering leaving your state because someone keeps phoning you and you're entertaining marrying someone when you think you should shop around first.

I strongly believe that if you are even considering being with someone other than the person you are with, then you shouldn't be with them because you are not invested. If you are having to ask complete strangers if you are ready to marry & do something with your biological clock at 26, then you are already know the answer ... "NO"

I'm sorry to be as snarky as I am obviously being but, again .... what?

This is just my two cents, but I wouldn't believe a magazine so much. I mean, instead of dating three more men, who you may/may not like more than your current boyfriend, why would you not evaluate where you see yourself with him in the next few years? Do you really think you could see yourself having a family with him? Would he be able to support you through all walks of life, can he be your closest friend, can you trust him with all your heart? Sometimes, I know this is cheesy, it's not about the numbers, it's really about that feeling you get when you're with someone. If I were in your place, I'd reevaluate my position instead of jumping out on a limb (and thereby, in the process, risking your relationship with Chris- he seems to be really protective of you) and dating three more guys just because some magazine said it (and yes, I tend to think more with my brain than my heart like you ) Do what makes YOU happy, and what is good for you, not for anyone else (well except your future children duh xD).

Sigh. We will see how you "love" that protective side after a bit of time. Sounds kind of smothering to me. Advice from an old guy...take your time, live life, and you will know it when its right...or at least as much as anyone ever knows.

Thank you for your input!!!!! :flowerforyou: I don't believe ALL the magazines, but Wired said it was from a study, so that's a science thing and I need to at leaste think about it from science's perspective.

Chris is really protective, I love that! I am so glad you know what it's like to think with your brain more than your heart and just do what makes you happy. You seem like a great person.:drinker:

Really?

M'kay. Well assuming that you are serious, and for the love of all that is awesome, I hope this is a joke, there is no magic # of people you need to date in life. You know when you know.

Chris sounds like a controlling person. I can't imagine my husband (together 17 years this year) ever checking up on me or freaking out about me talking to other people - we are adults. It would not surprise me to learn that he lied to you about your ex cheating so that he could take advantage of the situation.

I find it difficult to believe that you broke up with your ex solely based on Chris' word.

for starters how in the world do you know the first guy was cheating on you? Because guy #2 told you? Have you thought that guy #2 told you that so he had a shot at you?

I thought the same thing.... hmmmm

This is just rude.

I am with Christ.

What? So now you expect us to believe that you're the Virgin Mary? Sacrilege!

Just have a MMMF fourway.

no no no no....someone has to be the Square peg for the round hole...or is that the round peg for the square holes?

it's MmmF

or Mmmf...

or mmmF

here...in case it's TL;DR

someone's gotta bottom.

DP and one in the piehole

Wow! Only 12??? I must have missed the memo.....

:drinker:

I'm positive I read the same study, and it said after 12 men you switch to women. I think an even dozen of each will help you decide what it is you really want.

What if I miss my soul mate?

There's your answer right there. You're still waiting for something better. And if your family doesn't like him... that's always a red flag.

So Chris said that your ex was cheating on you, but there's no way to prove it, and instead of being in a relationship with someone you couldn't prove was cheating meant you couldn't trust him? Has he admitted to it since you broke up? Apologized for it? How do you know Chris didn't make this up? That happened to me the same way once, turned out my 'Chris' had lied about it so we would break up and I would date him, and funny that... now you and Chris are dating.
Also, Chris wants to know what you're doing, who you're talking to, and get's jealous about other guys. ... how does this not send up any warning flags about someone being controlling? I think you're still in the ooo-shiny stage of your relationship, where everything seems great, and he seems so nice! It also sounds like he's pushing pretty fast for marriage too, how do you know this is what you want? There's some concerning issues there to sit down and think about, not just dismiss out of hand.

Do you have to move because an ex is calling you? Shoot no, they can do that no matter where you live. Now, if you lived in the same apt complex, that may be different. You're 26, not 36, your biological clock still has some time to go before you 'have' to commit to anything for the sake of having a family. Don't rush into anything, and if he's pushing and using mental tactics on you to get his way, that's another flag.

This isn't something we can make a decision for you, but I'd say no to the move, and if he doesn't want to continue the relationship, then so be it. Spend some time on your own, learning who you are, and what you want, instead of jumping into another relationship. Too many people feel they need to be in a relationship 'cuz', but they don't even know who they are by themselves and what they want, and any respecting partner should want someone who is a partner.

^ Don't listen to this. I like to keep my wife in a locked room. I think she's safer that way and it shows how much I love her.

I hope that room is the kitchen.

But I'm a really scientific person. That's why I tend to do badly in relationships. Anyway, studies show that you should date 12 people before you choose one to settle down with, and I've only dated 9. :noway: (I found that in Wired magazine, they are just great).

Can't agree with that... I only had 2 serious boyfriends before I got married. Nevertheless, I agree with the others... I find it odd that the friend of the boyfriend said you're being cheated on, couldn't prove it and now you're dating the friend. The "scientific" in you should caught on to that scheme a mile away.

^ Don't listen to this. I like to keep my wife in a locked room. I think she's safer that way and it shows how much I love her.

I hope that room is the kitchen.

Well If you are willing to follow wired magazines advice I think you already have your answer