Tattoo: Would you tell your S/O?

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Replies

  • TyTy76
    TyTy76 Posts: 1,761 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    You would divorce your wife over her getting a small tattoo?

    ANSWER - She never got it so she was not willing to find out.

    Good deal that you can put fear into your wife...

    It is a mutual thing. I would not do what she was strongly against.

    lol
    You don't get it...

    You basically threaten divorce if your wife gets a tattoo?
    I hope she gets it, for her sake.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    :laugh: Sounds like something my husband would say. That's too funny!!

    To the OP:

    I can't see it ending well if you tell your husband "when it's too late" that you've already decided to get a tattoo.

    My husband doesn't like tattoos. I don't have a tattoo but if I were to get one I wouldn't do it in secret or wait until the day of the appointment to tell him. That's just rude and disrespectful IMO.

    It's not about "doing what you want" or about this persons SO being controlling. If you knew going into the relationship that your SO didn't like tattoos then why would you want to cause an argument and animosity because you can "do what you want"? That's like agreeing that you didn't want to have children when you got married then five years down the road said "Screw you! I'm getting pregnant whether you like it or not!!"
  • delaniecastillo
    delaniecastillo Posts: 284
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    Ooh, what a big man! I bet your wife loves spitting in your sammiches after she gets sent back to the kitchen.
  • kennethmgreen
    kennethmgreen Posts: 1,759 Member
    If tattoos are trashy then someone needs to carry my *kitten* to the curb.

    ETA: it's your body and opinions are like *kitten* . . . everyone has one.
    Excellent tattoo idea. O-P-I-N-I-O-N in a circle, around the *kitten*.

    Setting my appointment now. No one steal this!
  • MexicanOsmosis
    MexicanOsmosis Posts: 382 Member
    Married or not, your body is your body and you should do what makes YOU happy, your husband didn't marry you for your tattoos or lack there of, he married you because he loves you and if a tattoo is all it takes to break a marriage then clearly there were underlying issues to begin with, he'll get over it and perhaps if it's super cute it may even turn him on ;)

    My thoughts, be honest with him about him because hiding it will just lead to more of an argument but do you, nobody can tell you what to do with your body!

    Good luck and happy inking (if you go ahead with it!)

    ^^THIS. Now, if it's a monetary reason that causes hesitation, that's a different story (as a good tattoo won't be cheap). Either way, IF you decide to get a tattoo, then tell him you're getting one and leave it at that.
  • onecatleadstoanother
    onecatleadstoanother Posts: 70 Member
    Been there. I got four small tattoos on the top of my foot, so fairly easy to hide. My boyfriend of 10 years hates tattoos, and I didn't tell him in advance I was getting them. I got them to remind myself of what was important in my life after being injured in a car accident. Now when I look at them, all I think about is how much he hates them and the huge fight we had. For me it wasn't worth it. After the fact he said that it a tattoo was that important to me we could have come to a compramise about location and size. At the end of the day, they're a permanent fashion trend.
  • jess7386
    jess7386 Posts: 477 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    You would divorce your wife over her getting a small tattoo?

    ANSWER - She never got it so she was not willing to find out.

    Good deal that you can put fear into your wife...

    It is a mutual thing. I would not do what she was strongly against.

    lol
    You don't get it...

    You basically threaten divorce if your wife gets a tattoo?
    I hope she gets it, for her sake.

    +1. I love how everyone rushes to the "d" word on here so quickly.
  • BioMechHeretic
    BioMechHeretic Posts: 128 Member
    Openness is key to a relationship.

    It's your body, you do as you wish with it. That being said, it's also your husband's own choice with what he decides to do in reaction as well.
  • _Waffle_
    _Waffle_ Posts: 13,049 Member
    If you want a tattoo, just tell him.
    Communication is key.

    Also, it's your body. Do what you want.

    Tell him his hand doesn't have a tattoo. He can still keep the relationship with that.
  • IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym
    IpuffyheartHeelsinthegym Posts: 5,573 Member
    I have 3 and want at least 2 or so more. I get them in discreet places, because they are for me, not the world... until I wear a bikini, then meh. My guy agrees - he likes the tattoos, so long as they can be hidden wearing clothes. I wouldn't keep something like that from him, and if you are going to, at least consider somewhere not so obvious, maybe??
  • Katrina_vw91
    Katrina_vw91 Posts: 232 Member
    You could try to explain to him the significance of the tattoo and how much it would mean to you. Tattoos are different in everyones eyes. Some think they are trashy, some think they are pieces of art.
  • Calliope610
    Calliope610 Posts: 3,783 Member
    BAAAAAAAAAAAD idea, seriously.

    Tell him, have the fight, and talk it out. Is his only reason because they are trashy? Don't deceive your husband.

    Yeah, make-up sex is awesome.
  • livingfortheone
    livingfortheone Posts: 273 Member
    Sounds like you don't want to be married.
  • mamacita721
    mamacita721 Posts: 194 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    Was the lack of conversation caused by the fact that she was packing your *kitten* up?

    Anyone who ever thought it was ok to treat me that way would be my ex real quick.
  • TheRoadDog
    TheRoadDog Posts: 11,788 Member
    My hubby doen't really care for tattoos, he thinks they are trashy. I don't have any, but not because I think they're trashy -- because I was scared to get one BECAUSE other people think they're trashy, and also the pain of getting one. I've decided I don't give a crap what other people think about it, I want to get one because I alwayy have wanted to. I KNOW if I tell my husband it will be a fight and he'll be a total d i c k about it. I have an appointment booked to get a not-that-discreet arm tattoo and I don't plan on telling him until it's too late. I'm thinking this is going to go the same way naming your baby an ugly name will go. Tell people in advance and they will have an opinion, tell people with your kid in your arms and "he's beautiful!" Am I deluding myself? I just don't want to hear him ***** and moan up until the day I get it done. Thoughts?

    There are more important issues here than getting a tattoo.
  • dirty_dirty_eater
    dirty_dirty_eater Posts: 574 Member
    If you feel strongly enough about getting one, you should feel strongly enough about discussing it beforehand with your husband, seeing as you already know it will be an issue for him.

    The underlying relationship doesn't sound very promising though.
    He isn't supportive of your desires and you're willing to get sneaky to do what you know he won't approve of.


    Good luck,
  • GURLEY_GIRL3
    GURLEY_GIRL3 Posts: 347 Member
    yes I would tell him. Why not? You are both adults. If he hates them. How about you put it somewhere you could hide it. I have 2 myself. But I work in a bank so I do cover them and where I put them I can hide them.
  • Donald_Dozier_50
    Donald_Dozier_50 Posts: 395 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    I hope she and her next husband are happy...


    lol................... 34 years and still married
  • Leather_N_Lace
    Leather_N_Lace Posts: 518 Member
    I'm not sure what direction to go here.. Mainly due to my mood right now. My husband is not very supportive of my weight and has often used my weight gain against me in disagreements. I am a recovering addict and since I got clean, I gained a lot of weight. He has the metabolism of a hummingbird and can eat to his heart's desire. He has often said that he was embarrassed to be seen with me in public and etc... So this year I really started to focus on me and my health. Not for him finally, but for me. Also, I decided to do something that was permanent to my body.. I have a LARGE tattoo that I have been working on since March. My thoughts, if he can't accept me through the things I can change, is he willing to accept me through something I cannot... Now just to be clear, he knew that I was getting a tattoo.. He just didn't know I was going to make it a project:laugh:

    I am by no means condoning my behaviour or saying what I am doing is healthy.. but this is my body and I will treat it in a way that I want to.. With or without his permission.
  • Alex_is_Hawks
    Alex_is_Hawks Posts: 3,499 Member
    Don't do it. Looking at your tracker, I see you have over 40 lbs to lose. Your tattoo will look different once you lose it all. Why don't you wait until you are in your goal shape, then do body mods? Also, tell your husband.

    I've lost 150 + pounds and my tattoos look the same.
  • JustJennie1
    JustJennie1 Posts: 3,749 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    I hope she and her next husband are happy...


    lol................... 34 years and still married

    I guess I'm the only one who thought the comment was funny.

    Waaaay too many sensitive people here.
  • Melissa22G
    Melissa22G Posts: 847 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    Did you tell her to "Shadup and go make a sammich!"?


    :laugh:
  • galloway1212
    galloway1212 Posts: 10
    as someone who is tattooed, I found that involving my husband in the whole process really helped. talking to him about it, going over designs, the placement of said tattoo, artists and studios. It took the trashy factor out of the whole thing and brought in an art-type vibe to the whole thing for him. he understood the why's of my wanting a tattoo(s) better after that. just be super honest in what you want and really listen to what he thinks about it too, then maybe compromise on the placement or the size... I think getting it done without him knowing would open up a huge can of worms! and possibly cause major problems.

    good luck and be warned once you get one you'll want more... :smile:
  • gdrmuzak
    gdrmuzak Posts: 103 Member
    I think you're showing a total lack of respect for your marriage by doing something behind his back ESPECIALLY when you know he wouldn't like it. To me, a marriage is about two people serving and submitting to one another, especially when it comes to strong feelings about something permanent.

    Yes, it's your body and you can make that decision. Why would you choose to do that when he has such strong feelings against it? How is that beneficial to your marriage relationship? At the same time, when you got married you also gave yourself to your spouse and so a permanent decision like this I think should also involve him.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    You would divorce your wife over her getting a small tattoo?

    what if it was another man's name?
  • DixieDarlin1987
    DixieDarlin1987 Posts: 553 Member
    It's your body and 100% your decision but I wouldn't surprise him with it. I have a couple of tattoos that I had before I was married. My husband doesn't dislike tattoos...he says it's a matter of placement. However, he doesn't want any and I'm cool with that... I want more and he's cool with that too. He should definitely be aware of your decision but he shouldn't get to make it for you. And, unlike some other posters...it should not be such a big deal that it puts your marriage in jeopardy. That's just silly
  • datguy2011
    datguy2011 Posts: 477 Member
    sounds like the key to a successful marriage

    beauty.
  • highervibes
    highervibes Posts: 2,219 Member
    I would tell your husband now and get the fight over with, if you're that determined to get a tat, cus there's gonna be a fight either way.

    This is probably the best solution. I'm definitely getting it, and I KNOW he would never divorce me over a tattoo - that is completely ridiculous lol. I think I should definitely tell him in advance after thinking about it. Maybe I'll leave the card out on the counter as an ice breaker.
  • jess7386
    jess7386 Posts: 477 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.

    I hope she and her next husband are happy...


    lol................... 34 years and still married

    I guess I'm the only one who thought the comment was funny.

    Waaaay too many sensitive people here.

    by his own admission, he wasn't saying it be funny. also, i generally don't take threatening/controlling your partner as humorous.
  • eric_sg61
    eric_sg61 Posts: 2,925 Member
    My thoughts:

    Well from the "hubby's" point of view, I have to totally agree with HIM. When my wife mentioned the possibility of getting a small tattoo I told her that it would be fine, her next husband would probably like it. No argument, no further conversation was needed.
    Wow, the feminazis and white knights didn't see the humor in your post.

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