My Boyfriend thinks I'm Fat

feelingreat90
feelingreat90 Posts: 5
in Introduce Yourself
My boyfriend thinks I am out of shape and chubby. I am 5'6" and weigh 140 pounds. At 145, he thinks I'm fat, and he can deal with it when I'm 135. Oh the things we do for love...

Is this ok? I'm not sure whether to be upset about or agree with him. Its true i'm not at my most idea weight, but I eat healthy, do yoga all the time, and do the best I can with exercise for having a job that requires me to be sitting 9 hours a day.

I used to be good with how I looked, but he really likes skinny girls and makes me feel like "I look good" is not as adequate as "I look like a sport's illustrated model."
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Replies

  • pinkpatron
    pinkpatron Posts: 154
    Lol get rid of his sorry butt before he feeds you more BS that you will get stuck in your mind and think about constantly.

    Seems like a real loser if you ask me. Guys really say these things to their girlfriends?!


    So glad I'm dating a real man.
  • Alyssah09
    Alyssah09 Posts: 357 Member
    Sorry OP but he sounds like a Jerk. I would not date ANYONE who said I was fat, especially at 145! Are you kidding? I would kill to be 145.

    I think that he is rude and personally YES I think there is a problem there and it is not okay...but thats just me.
  • sophiercook
    sophiercook Posts: 46 Member
    tell him to shut his mouth! 140 is totally fine for your height! any man that makes jibes at his girlfriend like that is just flaunting his own insecurities. point out one of them to him, just to see how he likes it.
  • ginny22890
    ginny22890 Posts: 7 Member
    He sounds like a super douche bag. If you're happy with how you look that should be all that matters.....leave his *kitten*
  • mjaustin45
    mjaustin45 Posts: 22 Member
    That is so unfortunate that he talks and treats you that way. I would definitely get rid of him and date someone who treats you with respect. If you want to lose weight or get in shape, do it for yourself...not for him. You need to do what makes you happy.
  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
    my ex was 5'6 and 145 she was so skinny to me. she gained up to 170 and still looked amazing to me. drop your boyfriend he sounds like a loser.
  • puddintot
    puddintot Posts: 41 Member
    You need to look up verbally abusive relationships and then decide for yourself. I cannot imagine anyone that is supposed to love me calling me fat. And after having 3 kids I am!
  • lynnerack
    lynnerack Posts: 158 Member
    Get rid!
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
    Once upon a time I was 5'5" and 125 pounds. I wore a size 2-4. I was with a guy who said things that made me feel I was unattractive and made me feel all kinds of awful things about myself. And guess what? He was wrong. Don't believe it just because your boyfriend says it; in fact, someone would would tell you that in those terms is most likely wrong about a lot of things.

    If you want to get into your ideal shape, dump him and do it for you.
  • JenAndSome
    JenAndSome Posts: 1,893 Member
    You're boyfriend sounds like a jerk. I would beat the crap out of my boyfriend if he called me fat. You need to do what makes you happy. If you think you need to lose weight do it, but don't do it for him.
  • thekyleo
    thekyleo Posts: 632 Member
    troll post
  • HeidiCooksSupper
    HeidiCooksSupper Posts: 3,831 Member
    At 5'6" and 145 you have a normal, healthy BMI. You are technically not even overweight. The issue is respect and CONTROL. If he is trying to control your weight and self esteem at the 10-pound level of variance that is excessive and you should run as fast as you can in the other direction. What behavior of yours will he want to control next?
  • missmeganlyn
    missmeganlyn Posts: 14
    That's not ok. That is a healthy weight for you. No one deserves that.
  • SkinnyMsFitness
    SkinnyMsFitness Posts: 389 Member
    My boyfriend thinks I am out of shape and chubby. I am 5'6" and weigh 140 pounds. At 145, he thinks I'm fat, and he can deal with it when I'm 135. Oh the things we do for love...

    Is this ok? I'm not sure whether to be upset about or agree with him. Its true i'm not at my most idea weight, but I eat healthy, do yoga all the time, and do the best I can with exercise for having a job that requires me to be sitting 9 hours a day.

    I used to be good with how I looked, but he really likes skinny girls and makes me feel like "I look good" is not as adequate as "I look like a sport's illustrated model."

    Sorry to say, you need to dump his *kitten*! This is not a healthy relationship, and you could suffer the consequences even long after you would break up with him. Although you may love him, etc, etc, it's not worth it. Do yourself a favor and move on.

    I will say your current weight is a TINY bit on the heavier side...but the 145 is definitely healthy!! I know this b/c I'm 5'7 - very similar to you!!!! And I also know the ****ty effects of an abusive relationship b/c I was in one. I live with an anxiety disorder today...and will for life...and I'm pretty sure it's b/c of my ex. Not worth it!! Mine abused me physically, mentally and emotionally. I don't know much about yours, but he's at least abusing you mentally.

    Do yourself a favor and drop your boyfriend...not your weight! =))
  • TyTy76
    TyTy76 Posts: 1,761 Member
    troll post

    Yours?
    Yes.
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
    I think your boyfriend has a small weiner. I'm sorry. :( Poor girl.
  • countingthreads
    countingthreads Posts: 7
    He's a loser; dump him. I have a wonderful hubby who has stuck with me through all my weight gains/losses and even at 5' and 245 lbs thinks I'm still pretty. He refuses to believe I'm that heavy!

    There are real men out there who look at the whole person and love them for who they are - go find one of them and don't waste any more time with this idiot.
  • amirahdaboss
    amirahdaboss Posts: 921 Member
    hes an *kitten*
  • Hollywoodm55
    Hollywoodm55 Posts: 155 Member
    I'd kick my husbands *kitten* if he ever said something like that to me. If you want to lose weight do it for yourself, no one else.
  • FrankiesSaysRelax
    FrankiesSaysRelax Posts: 403 Member
    He sounds like a super douche bag. If you're happy with how you look that should be all that matters.....leave his *kitten*

    Absolutely.
  • lraien
    lraien Posts: 29 Member
    If you were legitimately overweight and like 40 pounds heavier than when you got together, I would say he had a valid point but what you've described just sounds like a tool. You're better off ending it now.
  • likitisplit
    likitisplit Posts: 9,420 Member
    I think my husband is old. I mean, he's 45. He could work out more. And load the dishwasher.

    But, seriously? The issue is what *you* think. If *you* think you're unfit and you want to do something about it, then more power to you. Him thinking you're fat is HIS problem that HE needs to resolve. And he needs to do it without hurt you too.
  • Mcgrawhaha
    Mcgrawhaha Posts: 1,596 Member
    I agree. I think he in manifesting his insecurities regarding his small genitalia by focusing on an unrealistic idea that you are not up to par, which in turn may help him feel better about himself... he has small genitals, your chubby... obviously a match made in heaven...

    CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT YOUR FUTURE LOOKS LIKE WITH AN *kitten* LIKE HIM?
  • scottjoh
    scottjoh Posts: 77 Member
    Yes the guy is a jerk, but why tell him your weight in the first place. Does he make you weigh in every day? On a similar note to all women: Don't ask a man if something you are wearing makes you look fat it you aren't prepared for the truth. If you want a lie then you shouldn't ask.
  • verptwerp
    verptwerp Posts: 3,629 Member
    troll post

    ^
    ^
    this ...... hope so ..... or else someone needs to get a backbone :drinker:
  • downinaggieland98
    downinaggieland98 Posts: 224 Member
    I'm usually not the one to say dump him, but ... dump him.

    Thankfully you aren't married to him, and you don't have to put up with that. If he has no problems being rude to you about that, what else is he telling you? He doesn't deserve you... find someone who does!
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
    DTMFA
  • smayo79
    smayo79 Posts: 1 Member
    Girl..Do yourself a favor and dump him. If he likes skinner girls the tell him to find some. I wish I weighted what you do! Don't like anyone strip your self esteem! There is someone out there that will love for you, better or for worst!
  • dejesus4
    dejesus4 Posts: 32 Member
    If he is truly the one he will love you fat or skinny. Dump his butt.
  • gonnamakeanewaccount
    gonnamakeanewaccount Posts: 642 Member
    Just break up.

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