Question for those who don't want to be ripped.

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  • contingencyplan
    contingencyplan Posts: 3,639 Member
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    OP: From what it sounds like your goals involve building up the same amount of muscle as a "ripped" girl but just not dieting down to achieve that ultra low level of body fat. This is pretty easy. You still have to work your butt off in workouts the same, but you don't have to be as anal retentive about your dieting, and when you get to a point where you like what you see in the mirror, simply stop eating at a deficit. It's just that simple.

    I started out as obese at 335 lbs and all I wanted was to get to a point where my weight and fitness level were no longer a factor negatively affecting my favorite pastime: Motorcycle riding (sportbike). Now that I've achieved that goal I really don't care enough to keep being so anal retentive about nutrition and fitness is no longer a priority. I still do workouts 3x a week but only out of habit. I've reached my goal and I'm happy with that.
  • tommyswoman
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    I understood what you were saying, OP. I am in the same boat as you. I find these boards get a bit rough sometimes too. That's why I don't say very much.
  • Th3stral
    Th3stral Posts: 93 Member
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    Well come to the MFP forums! Everyone reads what they want to, lots of people who look to have no idea what they are talking about start spouting all sorts of generalisations and/or applying their own experience as being the ONLY way for EVERYONE to achieve what they think is the right thing!

    Take it with a pinch of salt I say! You've quite clearly previously been far fitter than many who post so off the back of that you will have a better first hand understanding of what is required to achieve that level. I entirely got what you meant! Now just don't go mentioning that you have any flabby bits anywhere or you'll start the old favourite of "the ONLY way to loose it is to lift heavy", also don't mention how many calories you are/aren't eating or any 'programs' you may be following to aid your calorie control/cravings or medical conditions or you'll be set for a load more preaching!
  • Sgtphalanx
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    Look there's no reason to get hurt and leave MFP because I made a comment you don't like that you say doesn't apply to you anyway. If it doesn't apply, just move on. If someone says to me "You're so tall it makes you hideous" the insult doesn't sting at all, because I know I'm not tall. (Stupid example, I know....I'm not feeling creative)

    I stand by the sentiment that not wanting to get ripped is *generally* an excuse not to do the work at all. Even if my comment doesn't apply to you personally, it will apply to some others that come in to this thread looking for a kindred spirit based on the title.

    Your wrong though. First of all you need to consider peoples esteem levels. Obviously the OP was once in shape and feels that her muscularity was too much previously, maybe on her last attempt at weight loss, so she wants to dial it back from her last attempt. Maybe shes trying to do something different, like weights or a new section of exercise that has a risk of tone and definition. The part that matters is that YOU don't know who, why or how, and then made a stupid comment to a vulnerable person, and tweaked her head. She wont thank you for being a blunt person, as not everyone needs a slap across the face to get there stuff in gear. Some people need a gentle hand, some need lots of positive comments, others just need to be stroked occasionally. What you did was give a general slap to a obviously vulnerable person, then say "She shouldn't be hurt by it, so i'm not at fault". So woman up and apologize meaningfully cause you hurt someone if it wasn't your intent to hurt, or keep being abusive, I don't care, but leave the OP alone.

    To the OP, you probably struck a nerve with how you relayed your question. It wasn't your intent, but some people who might be struggling with definition or toning, might get a bit hurt or upset with the comment of accidentally getting there, when there pouring hours upon hours to get there. Its not a big deal, and you clarified way better later, just take a step back and realize you may be hurting someone. It would be the equivalent to you reading a post of someone struggling to eat there calories in a day, or maybe something similar. Just try to be as neutral and explicit with your posts as possible so people don't think your trying to be offensive. that should help clarity in the future. Also shake off what people say. not everyone is a internet troll, but some people get on the internet, to build themselves up by hurting others, and its not worth it to take them to heart. (Not accusing anyone in this thread, just a general warning).
  • wesleycneill
    wesleycneill Posts: 64 Member
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    If you eat clean, healthy macros and exercise you will get ripped, period. The higher the muscle to fat ratio is, the more definition you will have. That doesn't just apply to those who lift weights. It applies to anyone who uses their muscles in any way in conjunction with a healthy diet.

    If you want to just get thinner without definition: Eat whatever you want long as it is below your deficit, and make sure not to exercise or get enough sleep. Your body will break up your muscles and use the protein as a source of energy in conjunction with fat. Just don't expect to have high energy levels or be in general good health.
  • MoreBean13
    MoreBean13 Posts: 8,701 Member
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    Look there's no reason to get hurt and leave MFP because I made a comment you don't like that you say doesn't apply to you anyway. If it doesn't apply, just move on. If someone says to me "You're so tall it makes you hideous" the insult doesn't sting at all, because I know I'm not tall. (Stupid example, I know....I'm not feeling creative)

    I stand by the sentiment that not wanting to get ripped is *generally* an excuse not to do the work at all. Even if my comment doesn't apply to you personally, it will apply to some others that come in to this thread looking for a kindred spirit based on the title.

    Your wrong though. First of all you need to consider peoples esteem levels. Obviously the OP was once in shape and feels that her muscularity was too much previously, maybe on her last attempt at weight loss, so she wants to dial it back from her last attempt. Maybe shes trying to do something different, like weights or a new section of exercise that has a risk of tone and definition. The part that matters is that YOU don't know who, why or how, and then made a stupid comment to a vulnerable person, and tweaked her head. She wont thank you for being a blunt person, as not everyone needs a slap across the face to get there stuff in gear. Some people need a gentle hand, some need lots of positive comments, others just need to be stroked occasionally. What you did was give a general slap to a obviously vulnerable person, then say "She shouldn't be hurt by it, so i'm not at fault". So woman up and apologize meaningfully cause you hurt someone if it wasn't your intent to hurt, or keep being abusive, I don't care, but leave the OP alone.

    To the OP, you probably struck a nerve with how you relayed your question. It wasn't your intent, but some people who might be struggling with definition or toning, might get a bit hurt or upset with the comment of accidentally getting there, when there pouring hours upon hours to get there. Its not a big deal, and you clarified way better later, just take a step back and realize you may be hurting someone. It would be the equivalent to you reading a post of someone struggling to eat there calories in a day, or maybe something similar. Just try to be as neutral and explicit with your posts as possible so people don't think your trying to be offensive. that should help clarity in the future. Also shake off what people say. not everyone is a internet troll, but some people get on the internet, to build themselves up by hurting others, and its not worth it to take them to heart. (Not accusing anyone in this thread, just a general warning).

    Honesty isn't abusive. Some people need a wake up call.There are tons of people on this site that will offer endless "WTG!" type support; I'm not in to coddling. If you can't handle the main forums, there are public and private groups that offer whatever type of support you're looking for.

    I'm finished discussing this. I tried to offer help and I'm not going to apologize for it. I wish everyone success in achieving their goals.

    I find it very odd that you created an anonymous profile just to make this comment to me.
  • curly1986
    curly1986 Posts: 98 Member
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    Amazing how so many people read your question and assumed you were worried about getting ripped by accident. Thats not even close to how I interpreted the question.

    Similiar to you I want to be a healthy weight and BF%, and I'd like to have a good level of cadiovascular fitness. But I don't have any personal desire to go down the route of a lot of lifting. I do a wee bit of arm work just to build a bit of strength and to minimize bingo wings!! lol As I get closer to GW I may change my mind and want to dedicate a lot of time to lifting, but its not in my plans just now.
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    Even when I do lose weight, no one who speaks to me like you will ever be thanked. There is a difference between constructive criticism and having no tact. I am new to this site, but not to weight loss and exercise. Your experience means nothing to mean in the form you threw it out there.
    I liked beans post, it's honest. I was basically thinking the same thing but didn't say anything. So, for future benefit, how would one say what bean said with however amount of tact that you in particularly were wishing for? I'd like to be able to say what she said but since you don't like it I'd like to know a way that someone like you would listen to and benefit from.
  • DashDeV
    DashDeV Posts: 545 Member
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    So you want to lose weight and not gain muscle? Some people may call that "skinny fat", but if that's what you're after just diet with some cardio (you don't need to do cardio though) and no weight lifting.
  • CoderGal
    CoderGal Posts: 6,800 Member
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    So you want to lose weight and not gain muscle? Some people may call that "skinny fat", but if that's what you're after just diet with some cardio (you don't need to to cardio though) and no weight lifting.
    For the record the chances the OP would start gaining a chunk of muscle on a calorie deficit is slim to none. She's more likely to lose both fat and muscle. With strength training, it would be a higher percentage of fat. For the record, I do stronglifts 5x5 a few times a week, I am lifting some things that are finally heavy enough to have 3 digits, and I haven't gotten huge yet.
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,639 Member
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    Even when I do lose weight, no one who speaks to me like you will ever be thanked. There is a difference between constructive criticism and having no tact. I am new to this site, but not to weight loss and exercise. Your experience means nothing to mean in the form you threw it out there.
    I liked beans post, it's honest. I was basically thinking the same thing but didn't say anything. So, for future benefit, how would one say what bean said with however amount of tact that you in particularly were wishing for? I'd like to be able to say what she said but since you don't like it I'd like to know a way that someone like you would listen to and benefit from.

    You perceive it as honest, a lot of people perceive it as tactless.

    Insinuating that somebody wants to remain fat but is putting it under the excuse that they do not want to get ripped is not being honest, it is being tactless and frankly, it was unnecessary.

    Still, I am guessing that people that say such things to people, would never mind things being said in a similar vein to themselves :)
  • TyTy76
    TyTy76 Posts: 1,761 Member
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    Even when I do lose weight, no one who speaks to me like you will ever be thanked. There is a difference between constructive criticism and having no tact. I am new to this site, but not to weight loss and exercise. Your experience means nothing to mean in the form you threw it out there.
    I liked beans post, it's honest. I was basically thinking the same thing but didn't say anything. So, for future benefit, how would one say what bean said with however amount of tact that you in particularly were wishing for? I'd like to be able to say what she said but since you don't like it I'd like to know a way that someone like you would listen to and benefit from.

    You perceive it as honest, a lot of people perceive it as tactless.

    Insinuating that somebody wants to remain fat but is putting it under the excuse that they do not want to get ripped is not being honest, it is being tactless and frankly, it was unnecessary.

    Still, I am guessing that people that say such things to people, would never mind things being said in a similar vein to themselves :)

    Meh.
    When I first started on MFP I would make threads with all types of excuses as to why I couldn't do this.

    I had a good friend of mine now, tell me that maybe it would be easier to "just stay fat".

    She was right, and that was the jolt I needed.
  • DashDeV
    DashDeV Posts: 545 Member
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    Even when I do lose weight, no one who speaks to me like you will ever be thanked. There is a difference between constructive criticism and having no tact. I am new to this site, but not to weight loss and exercise. Your experience means nothing to mean in the form you threw it out there.
    I liked beans post, it's honest. I was basically thinking the same thing but didn't say anything. So, for future benefit, how would one say what bean said with however amount of tact that you in particularly were wishing for? I'd like to be able to say what she said but since you don't like it I'd like to know a way that someone like you would listen to and benefit from.

    You perceive it as honest, a lot of people perceive it as tactless.

    Insinuating that somebody wants to remain fat but is putting it under the excuse that they do not want to get ripped is not being honest, it is being tactless and frankly, it was unnecessary.

    Still, I am guessing that people that say such things to people, would never mind things being said in a similar vein to themselves :)

    I'm just going to jump in here and say that is exactly what it sounds like OP is saying. She wants to lose weight, not get "ripped" (but that was just a figure of speech apparently??), and be healthy.

    So an option is..don't exercise, eat at a deficit, look good with your clothes on, but still be fat with them off.
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,639 Member
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    Even when I do lose weight, no one who speaks to me like you will ever be thanked. There is a difference between constructive criticism and having no tact. I am new to this site, but not to weight loss and exercise. Your experience means nothing to mean in the form you threw it out there.
    I liked beans post, it's honest. I was basically thinking the same thing but didn't say anything. So, for future benefit, how would one say what bean said with however amount of tact that you in particularly were wishing for? I'd like to be able to say what she said but since you don't like it I'd like to know a way that someone like you would listen to and benefit from.

    You perceive it as honest, a lot of people perceive it as tactless.

    Insinuating that somebody wants to remain fat but is putting it under the excuse that they do not want to get ripped is not being honest, it is being tactless and frankly, it was unnecessary.

    Still, I am guessing that people that say such things to people, would never mind things being said in a similar vein to themselves :)

    Meh.
    When I first started on MFP I would make threads with all types of excuses as to why I couldn't do this.

    I had a good friend of mine now, tell me that maybe it would be easier to "just stay fat".

    She was right, and that was the jolt I needed.

    Unfortunately, your own situation is nothing like the OP's lol, she is not a stranger to exercise, read her whole original posting, she is not a lazy couch potato.

    This is why I think the OP definitely did not need that slap to get going, it really isn't necessary, she knows already what she is doing, but just wondered if there were others on MFP with similar physique goals - this thread of course, like most other threads, took a completely wrong turning and took the original posting completely out of context.
  • DebbieLyn63
    DebbieLyn63 Posts: 2,650 Member
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    Don't worry - no one gets ripped by accident.

    I was using "ripped" as an expression. As I was pretty "ripped" before I know it doesn't happen by accident. I am not worried about suddenly waking up with 8 pack abs. I was simply feeling out to see if there were others like me: Not training for anything, just getting healthier.
    I got your point in your OP, but apparently it went over many people's heads.

    Yes, there are many people on here who are just looking to lose weight and get healthier, and are not attempting to be 'ripped'. They just usually stay off the forums so they don't get blasted for having different goals.

    You are probably getting a few FRs from them now. That is how it usually works. :drinker:
  • J2U1N
    J2U1N Posts: 16
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    Even when I do lose weight, no one who speaks to me like you will ever be thanked. There is a difference between constructive criticism and having no tact. I am new to this site, but not to weight loss and exercise. Your experience means nothing to mean in the form you threw it out there.
    I liked beans post, it's honest. I was basically thinking the same thing but didn't say anything. So, for future benefit, how would one say what bean said with however amount of tact that you in particularly were wishing for? I'd like to be able to say what she said but since you don't like it I'd like to know a way that someone like you would listen to and benefit from.

    You perceive it as honest, a lot of people perceive it as tactless.

    Insinuating that somebody wants to remain fat but is putting it under the excuse that they do not want to get ripped is not being honest, it is being tactless and frankly, it was unnecessary.

    Still, I am guessing that people that say such things to people, would never mind things being said in a similar vein to themselves :)

    Meh.
    When I first started on MFP I would make threads with all types of excuses as to why I couldn't do this.

    I had a good friend of mine now, tell me that maybe it would be easier to "just stay fat".

    She was right, and that was the jolt I needed.

    Unfortunately, your own situation is nothing like the OP's lol, she is not a stranger to exercise, read her whole original posting, she is not a lazy couch potato.

    This is why I think the OP definitely did not need that slap to get going, it really isn't necessary, she knows already what she is doing, but just wondered if there were others on MFP with similar physique goals - this thread of course, like most other threads, took a completely wrong turning and took the original posting completely out of context.

    Ding Ding!!:drinker:
  • DashDeV
    DashDeV Posts: 545 Member
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    I got your point in your OP, but apparently it went over many people's heads.

    Yes, there are many people on here who are just looking to lose weight and get healthier, and are not attempting to be 'ripped'. They just usually stay off the forums so they don't get blasted for having different goals.

    You are probably getting a few FRs from them now. That is how it usually works. :drinker:

    It's probably because she said she doesn't want to be ripped. People were educating her that there is no risk of that happening, then she said she used it as a figure of speech which made her post even more confusing.

    "She is not entering any weight lifting contest or running any marathons" I took that as a figure of speech for she doesn't want to exercise to lose weight. She wants to "get healthy" okay...so have regular doctor check ups, floss your teeth, don't take drugs?? ..I mean.. what are you asking???
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,268 Member
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    "She is not entering any weight lifting contest or running any marathons" I took that as a figure of speech for she doesn't want to exercise to lose weight.

    Why assume that's what was meant...I wont be entering any weight lifting contests or running a marathon either but that doesn't mean I don't want to exercise...it means I don't want to run a marathon or enter any weight lifting contests.
  • __Di__
    __Di__ Posts: 1,639 Member
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    "She is not entering any weight lifting contest or running any marathons" I took that as a figure of speech for she doesn't want to exercise to lose weight.

    Why assume that's what was meant...I wont be entering any weight lifting contests or running a marathon either but that doesn't mean I don't want to exercise...it means I don't want to run a marathon or enter any weight lifting contests.

    Oi StephanieWort, I was gonna type identical to your posting there :laugh: :flowerforyou:
  • DashDeV
    DashDeV Posts: 545 Member
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    "She is not entering any weight lifting contest or running any marathons" I took that as a figure of speech for she doesn't want to exercise to lose weight.

    Why assume that's what was meant...I wont be entering any weight lifting contests or running a marathon either but that doesn't mean I don't want to exercise...it means I don't want to run a marathon or enter any weight lifting contests.

    I would never assume she was going to do either of those things, so her mentioning that she wasn't is odd.