Asked for help, REFUSED! *rant*

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  • stackhead
    stackhead Posts: 121 Member
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    stackhead, i never said or even slightly implied u dont have a clue about the issues, sorry if u picked it up that way.
    what i want from the nhs? idk, i dont care if it is nhs or local council, i just want some sort of holistic support that helps with all the facrtors that lead to obesity, preferably with other ppl, i think this face to face input will keep me on track is all.

    That wasn't a quote from you, but from another poster. So no worries on that front.

    So essentially you want some kind of group counselling sessions? Have you thought about asking your Dr to refer you to a slimming class? You don't have to follow the diet plan but the group support involved might help, and most areas will pay your fees for you if you're refered by the GP.
  • joselo2
    joselo2 Posts: 461
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    I might think about the diet class thing if all else fails, i think i need myappointment at the gp to find out my options. i have to go for many hrs now, catch you all tomorrow afternoon!xx
  • Contrarian
    Contrarian Posts: 8,138 Member
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    Don't let this minor setback discourage you. You have done very well on your own, and I have every confidence that you will continue to be successful.

    Don't give up on the NHS, but, in the meantime, keep up what you have been doing. You have moral support and good advice here on MFP.
  • itsscottwilder
    itsscottwilder Posts: 317
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    I'm sure their recommendation to seek help at the hospital was purely due to liability issues. Try not to take it personally.

    +1

    It's this. The last thing this group wants is to put you on a training program where you'll actually do more harm than good to your body. What small group can afford to get sued into oblivion.
  • Hestion
    Hestion Posts: 740 Member
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    Lol i do disagree but writing to mps is pointless, we all know that.

    Why don't you join WW or slimming world?

    Seems to me your wasting time when you could already be getting started some other way just so you don't have to pay, and also so you can have someone else to put the blame onto?

    This is the harshest post I've ever written and I'm sorry about that, but I'm rather irked over the nhs putting money towards things that people bring on themselves and I'm not just talking weight! When i lost a dear friend the other year because they couldn't afford to fund enough ambulances and she bled out in rta because it took to long for the closest ambulance to get there. So yes i am a little sore on how they use my taxes and your attitude of entitlement!
  • mushroomsontoast
    mushroomsontoast Posts: 118 Member
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    Have you thought about asking your Dr to refer you to a slimming class? You don't have to follow the diet plan but the group support involved might help

    I was going to suggest that too, for the regular group support element.
  • mazdauk
    mazdauk Posts: 1,380 Member
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    I'm sure it's more of a liability issue than anything else. Someone with a BMI of 61 is probably not going to be able to do the exercise safely that they have planned.

    There's no reason you need a class to get you started on a healthier lifestyle. Start tracking your calories on here, eat at a deficit and start walking if you can. Weight comes off easily when you're in the morbidly obese range and you should be able to make some great progress without a hospital to help.

    This! MFP can give you as much support as many local groups, and just by logging what you eat, being mindful of your choices and walking more you can probably bring yourself down to a BMI of 40+ relatively easily. Every extra step you take - even if its just going up and down your stairs at home, or parking at the other side of the car park from the shops - will help bring the weight off.And if you can't take those extra steps - well, that is probably why the group was concerned about you being able to manage their classes.
  • MORECHABLIS
    MORECHABLIS Posts: 164 Member
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    You say that YOU are the only one that can lose weight, yet you want help, but not Hospitals, they are the 'link' to services... You must have 'mental issues' in your life to have become so obese (many are depressed etc), yet you say you are not sick.

    Perhaps you have to confront why you are SO obese... Then you will be able to take control of your eating and general life more...

    Don't rely on the NHS, unless you have a mental problem (but you say you are not sick), get them to sort this if it is a problem and the weight might drop off... Find a trainer at a council gym, perhaps just once a week to give you that boost, and/or join slimming world etc...

    Good luck... But take steps yourself... NHS is there for breaking a leg, cancer or mental problems...
  • squishy84
    squishy84 Posts: 30
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    I might think about the diet class thing if all else fails, i think i need myappointment at the gp to find out my options. i have to go for many hrs now, catch you all tomorrow afternoon!xx

    Have you thought about joining Slimming World (I am not sure if GP's can refer you on to a group?) - I swear, it's the one eating plan that's made sense to me, and I know people have really good results with it. That way you can get support of a group, but still have control and it's not so "medical"?
  • NonnyMary
    NonnyMary Posts: 982 Member
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    A person must be really in bad shape, more than they know, if a group of overweight people reject him. And for one of those overweight people to look at him and exclaim "you need a doctor!" is telling something.

    I beleive when the fat person (like me) realizes that the world does not or cannot accommodate their girth, when things become so uncomfortabel, and the person cant even find a two-seater to sit in, cant go to the theatre because there are no seats wide enough, and cant walk more than 1 city block, and cant breathe while walking up steps, and things get so hard that their pants rip in public, when they try to join a fat group and even the fat people reject him, then when life becomes so uncomfortble that they cant even breathe, they cant even control their food choices, and when the person realized how deathly sick that their fat might actually kill them and they will have to be on a breathing tube because their poor heart gave out finally, then that is the pain that will motivate them to change.

    As long as someone is catered to, is not made uncomfortable, wants only someone to pity them, and coddle them, and if a person can go along in life "ok" and not be discomforted because of their large girth, then they will not change.. no reason to. coz food tastes better than the denying of it. and life accommodates them in general, so no need to change.

    I think its a damn good thing that the OP got rejected.. This is the first step in getting so angry - that they will get angry enough at themselves for getting so damn big that even the fatties reject him. He needs to get angry at himself ,, and how he got there, and now how to get out of it so he wont go there EVER again.

    yes i said it - "fatties".. its a hard word to take, but its reality.
  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
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    stackhead, i never said or even slightly implied u dont have a clue about the issues, sorry if u picked it up that way.
    what i want from the nhs? idk, i dont care if it is nhs or local council, i just want some sort of holistic support that helps with all the facrtors that lead to obesity, preferably with other ppl, i think this face to face input will keep me on track is all.

    Just to explain for your info what the local council could do....

    The local council will have very limited involvement with you I suspect unless you meet "critical and substantial" levels of need under Community Care legislation, and you say you're not sick or disabled at this stage. Your local authority provides people with social care (for people who need home care, meals on wheels stuff like that) or adaptations to housing (stair lifts, adaptations to bathrooms etc).

    Very occasionally (as you know I work in this area) we get very large individuals for whom this applies, for example people who can no longer provide their own intimate care without help (washing etc), but like you said you're still fine for getting about and looking after yourself, so no point knocking on your council's door.

    I agree with people who said not to dismiss groups like WW or SW, as many people do great in that group environment with the peer support etc. Next step is an honest chat with your GP I think. :flowerforyou:
  • CollieFit
    CollieFit Posts: 1,683 Member
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    Ask your GP if you might be ok to be referred to your local "Exercise Referral" scheme.

    This gives you free access to gyms and a supervised activity plan with lifestyle support.

    Look here for your local one. http://activenewcastle.co.uk/health/livewell/
  • mirihawk
    mirihawk Posts: 34 Member
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    I'm interested to see what you will do next! Seems like Size10 has offered you even more good advice.

    I'm doing a Paleo Whole 30 and I'm in smaller pants than I have been in ages. If you want holistic, it uses food and not supplements or drinks. If you combine that with your GP sending you to gyms (lucky!) you could push past the plateau and keep losing.

    Sometimes your body just needs to be shaken up a bit after you have lost a substantial amount of weight. I don't know what plan you were using to lose the 60+ pounds you already lost.

    Personally, I wouldn't want to go to a group aimed at the bikini crowd. I don't think people who need to lose 20 or 30 pounds really understand what life is like for the morbidly obese. Speaking as one with a BMI in the 40s. :smile:

    Good luck, and please do let us know what happens!
  • sharonfoustmills
    sharonfoustmills Posts: 519 Member
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    they have this policy probably for one of two reasons:
    1) insurance recommendation/ limiting liability or 2) it is part of a research project that must have certain parameters in it

    look for another program, check out some church-held programs, there are lots of those
  • RoadsterGirlie
    RoadsterGirlie Posts: 1,195 Member
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    A person must be really in bad shape, more than they know, if a group of overweight people reject him. And for one of those overweight people to look at him and exclaim "you need a doctor!" is telling something.

    I beleive when the fat person (like me) realizes that the world does not or cannot accommodate their girth, when things become so uncomfortabel, and the person cant even find a two-seater to sit in, cant go to the theatre because there are no seats wide enough, and cant walk more than 1 city block, and cant breathe while walking up steps, and things get so hard that their pants rip in public, when they try to join a fat group and even the fat people reject him, then when life becomes so uncomfortble that they cant even breathe, they cant even control their food choices, and when the person realized how deathly sick that their fat might actually kill them and they will have to be on a breathing tube because their poor heart gave out finally, then that is the pain that will motivate them to change.

    As long as someone is catered to, is not made uncomfortable, wants only someone to pity them, and coddle them, and if a person can go along in life "ok" and not be discomforted because of their large girth, then they will not change.. no reason to. coz food tastes better than the denying of it. and life accommodates them in general, so no need to change.

    I think its a damn good thing that the OP got rejected.. This is the first step in getting so angry - that they will get angry enough at themselves for getting so damn big that even the fatties reject him. He needs to get angry at himself ,, and how he got there, and now how to get out of it so he wont go there EVER again.

    yes i said it - "fatties".. its a hard word to take, but its reality.

    I think I love you... :drinker: :flowerforyou:
  • Hildy_J
    Hildy_J Posts: 1,050 Member
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    There is a lot of prejudice against very overweight people. Somehow, people feel free to make moral judgments about prople because of their size. In my judgment, body weight and composition are morally neutral.

    Beautifully put. :-)
  • Mokey41
    Mokey41 Posts: 5,769 Member
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    A person must be really in bad shape, more than they know, if a group of overweight people reject him. And for one of those overweight people to look at him and exclaim "you need a doctor!" is telling something.

    I beleive when the fat person (like me) realizes that the world does not or cannot accommodate their girth, when things become so uncomfortabel, and the person cant even find a two-seater to sit in, cant go to the theatre because there are no seats wide enough, and cant walk more than 1 city block, and cant breathe while walking up steps, and things get so hard that their pants rip in public, when they try to join a fat group and even the fat people reject him, then when life becomes so uncomfortble that they cant even breathe, they cant even control their food choices, and when the person realized how deathly sick that their fat might actually kill them and they will have to be on a breathing tube because their poor heart gave out finally, then that is the pain that will motivate them to change.

    As long as someone is catered to, is not made uncomfortable, wants only someone to pity them, and coddle them, and if a person can go along in life "ok" and not be discomforted because of their large girth, then they will not change.. no reason to. coz food tastes better than the denying of it. and life accommodates them in general, so no need to change.

    I think its a damn good thing that the OP got rejected.. This is the first step in getting so angry - that they will get angry enough at themselves for getting so damn big that even the fatties reject him. He needs to get angry at himself ,, and how he got there, and now how to get out of it so he wont go there EVER again.

    yes i said it - "fatties".. its a hard word to take, but its reality.

    Well put. I live with an obese person who hasn't gotten to the point of realizing that it isn't up to the rest of us to make his life easy. I'd have him read this if I didn't think it would just make him go into the rant about being picked on again.
  • NonnyMary
    NonnyMary Posts: 982 Member
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    When i was overweigh last year, and getting more and more overweight, this is when i had no control over my food.. i didn't want to give up the pleasure of food. too much trouble,, easier to go eat lunch out, and when i had a craving, man, look out,, dont get in my way. i knew i was making myself worse, knees hurting, feet hurting, had to look for a bench every 20 minutes to sit down, etc... i knew it but the food was worth it. it also fulfilled some boredom and such like that. i did not have the strengh, motivation, willpower, nothing,, and i swear Classic Coke was an addiction, i mean really when that coke went down my throat, it was so cold and refreshing,, had to have it with ice cubes in a real glass. no disgusting diet coke for me. all the pizza i wanted. etc.. slowly i was doing even less and less, but had no control. and also no need to change, because if i was ok with it, then fine. you can live with this discomfort for a while. and i didn't look that bad. but i went up to 360 pounds, yikes... that is getting too close for comfort, another 40 pounds and i'll be 400.

    so when i started on my diet, i didn't know what to do or if i could do it, but i had to make up in my mind to start somewhere. and i did - gave up coke, desserts and added salt on food, i could live with that. i did that for a few weeks and then seen what else i could do,, then i found mfp.

    wow i feel like I've gotten church up in here, "I'm saved hallelujah" and now, after 3 months, I'm doing ok! I appreciate all who have helped me along the way, but really it was hard at first, but now not so hard. i do miss a few of my old Taco Bell and Pizza places, and KFC chicken, Popeyes, etc.. but really, its ok.. it really is :)
  • Chevy_Quest
    Chevy_Quest Posts: 2,012 Member
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    When i was overweigh last year, and getting more and more overweight, this is when i had no control over my food.. i didn't want to give up the pleasure of food. too much trouble,, easier to go eat lunch out, and when i had a craving, man, look out,, dont get in my way. i knew i was making myself worse, knees hurting, feet hurting, had to look for a bench every 20 minutes to sit down, etc... i knew it but the food was worth it. it also fulfilled some boredom and such like that. i did not have the strengh, motivation, willpower, nothing,, and i swear Classic Coke was an addiction, i mean really when that coke went down my throat, it was so cold and refreshing,, had to have it with ice cubes in a real glass. no disgusting diet coke for me. all the pizza i wanted. etc.. slowly i was doing even less and less, but had no control. and also no need to change, because if i was ok with it, then fine. you can live with this discomfort for a while. and i didn't look that bad. but i went up to 360 pounds, yikes... that is getting too close for comfort, another 40 pounds and i'll be 400.

    so when i started on my diet, i didn't know what to do or if i could do it, but i had to make up in my mind to start somewhere. and i did - gave up coke, desserts and added salt on food, i could live with that. i did that for a few weeks and then seen what else i could do,, then i found mfp.

    wow i feel like I've gotten church up in here, "I'm saved hallelujah" and now, after 3 months, I'm doing ok! I appreciate all who have helped me along the way, but really it was hard at first, but now not so hard. i do miss a few of my old Taco Bell and Pizza places, and KFC chicken, Popeyes, etc.. but really, its ok.. it really is :)

    This is "real" and a great post - good job ! ^^^
  • Binkie1955
    Binkie1955 Posts: 329 Member
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    Well we're happy to help you out. what can we do? the heck with those creeps.

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