Is my husband sabotaging my weight loss? HELP!

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  • HefferSprint
    HefferSprint Posts: 124 Member
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    I think you are on to something. I've known of two other women, whose husbands brought them doughnuts and chocolate, when they were trying to lose.

    Weird. Try chucking it out in the yard.
  • Hildy_J
    Hildy_J Posts: 1,050 Member
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    [quote/]

    you might want to consider listening to the good advice that is here from people who have been successful.

    Yep
    [/quote]

    Hmm. Define 'success'.
  • BeachIron
    BeachIron Posts: 6,490 Member
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    you might want to consider listening to the good advice that is here from people who have been successful.

    Yep

    Hmm. Define 'success'.
    [/quote]

    Having set and hit objectively definable long-term goals for your own fitness and health, and staying at that level of fitness and health over the long run.

    Each person has to set them for himself or herself, but I would suggest that they should probably pass the "smell test" if you are willing to share them with others.

    And it certainly doesn't involve making excuses, and then playing semantic games when you're called on it.

    ETA: I'm off to the gym to work on my own. Be back later for the lolz
  • Cortneyrenee04
    Cortneyrenee04 Posts: 1,117 Member
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    It takes practice saying no, and when you do you'll be super proud and empowered. Plus, when you do have one or two pieces, they'll taste SO much better than they did when you'd eat a whole bag all the time. Good luck!
  • methodman78
    methodman78 Posts: 126 Member
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    I'd come at it at a different angle, figure out something he wants to buy, add up all the money he is spending on these "treats" and say you could have this if you stopped buying me these,

    You are really pretty so maybe he's worried you'll run off with someone fitter if you get slimmer ;)
  • AliciaStaton
    AliciaStaton Posts: 328 Member
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    It sounds like you have a loving husband, however, this is all about your weight loss and its all about what you put in your mouth. You may need to have a word with him and just say to him, you are trying to lose weight and these things wont help with your weight loss. One thing that is bugging me though if he knows you are trying to lose weight why he is buying you these treats?
  • BlessingsinStore
    BlessingsinStore Posts: 6
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    lol my husband is deployed and I have been so successful but when he is home he does the same !!!!!
  • FakingFitness
    FakingFitness Posts: 325 Member
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    Your husband is sabotaging you, or you're sabotaging yourself?
    If someone is holding you down and forcing chocolate down your throat, you should call for help!
  • MelStren
    MelStren Posts: 457 Member
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    Ask him to bring you flowers instead.

    This^^^^^ or ask him to buy you gift certificates for a local spa.
  • Belinda658
    Belinda658 Posts: 181 Member
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    You have to learn to say no, or keep letting him "sabotage" you. Your choice
  • mtnhiker1
    mtnhiker1 Posts: 114 Member
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    Tough one. My wife likes to cook for me. After the left overs built up in the fridge and some started to spoil she got the Idea that I am serious about losing some weight. (Though at first she though I did not like her cooking any more).
  • conniemaxwell5
    conniemaxwell5 Posts: 943 Member
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    The only person that can truly sabotage you is you. You can ask him to not bring you those things, but ultimately it's your responsibility to find the will power to not eat them.
  • wild_wild_life
    wild_wild_life Posts: 1,334 Member
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    I haven't read all the posts, but I think there is more to it than "self control is up to you". Repeated offerings of food that don't fit into your plan and that you find difficult to resist is not cool (although not necessarily deliberate sabotage).

    We have a limited amount of willpower. The fewer choices we have to make based on willpower, the better those choices are likely to be. Having people bring you gifts which are only going to stress you out and test your willpower is not helpful. In fact that's sort of the opposite of "support", however it is intended.

    I definitely agree with those who recommend talking to him and helping him come up with other ways to channel his supportive urges. I'm sure if he understood he would be more than happy to support you in the best way he can.
  • JanieJack
    JanieJack Posts: 3,831 Member
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    I think there is more to it than "self control is up to you".

    I agree. There's a difference between having a lack of self control and someone trying to exploit you in an already weak area so that s/he can maintain the status quo of you depending on him/her or having low enough self esteem to not require respectful treatment or strong boundaries. You STILL have to make the healthy choices that are right for YOUR body, but it's just extra harder when the people around you don't want you to change.

    I say this as someone who left a relationship where my ex DID try to sabotage my health improvement efforts, and part of our relationship crumbling is that I finally realized what was happening, put my foot down, and stopped allowing it.

    In OPs case, though, I would make sure that's REALLY what's happening. It could be that he genuinely wants to help and if all he knows that makes you happy is sabotaging food, and you never tell him otherwise, then it's not really HIS fault if he keeps bringing it to you.
  • Bigjuicyhog
    Bigjuicyhog Posts: 61 Member
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    Well, she has not logged in several days, and looks like a compulsive snacker. Good luck!

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