At what age should you fly the nest?

twinketta
twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
In your opinion, what is the age that you think you should move out of the parental home and do your own thing?

I know that most times money will be a problem because you can not fund a place of your own....

,,,but let us suppose that you had the money and opportunity to move out of the parental home...would you stay or would you go and what age do you think is right?

Maybe you are a parent and you do not want your kids to leave?
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Replies

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  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
    I moved out the first opportunity I got which was 20 years old. In my opinion kids shouldn't leave home until they are 100% financially independent. Otherwise it's pointless. Going away for school doesn't really count either, unless you're working and supporting yourself.
  • twinketta
    twinketta Posts: 2,130 Member
    Had to look him up on wikipedia lol
  • whierd
    whierd Posts: 14,025 Member
    If you go from HS to college, then after you finish your degree and get fulltime employment.

    If you do not, then it depends.
  • RunWinterGarden
    RunWinterGarden Posts: 428 Member
    When you finish your education, whether that be high school or bachelors degree. I'm fine with grad school if you are doing something that you need a PHD for (lawyer, doctor, etc...)
  • ostrichagain
    ostrichagain Posts: 271 Member
    I left as soon as I was 18. My sister was an emancipated minor. We were all pretty excited to get OUT. At that point I had been working since I was 16, owned my car and had enough saved for a deposit in an apartment. BUT, I had been told from about the time I was 12 that I would be evicted when I turned 18.

    My parents believe in the sparrow method.

    I want my kid to go to college and I would support them in that. I they are working and living at home, I would expect them to pay something in rent.
  • MommyisFit
    MommyisFit Posts: 139 Member
    I moved out at 17. I know grown men in their 30's that still live at home. I think it really depends on the person and their maturity levels and finances. Now as a mom, I wouldn't want my child to move out too early!
  • fitmomhappymom
    fitmomhappymom Posts: 171 Member
    I moved out at 17(alone), had a child at 20, bought my own house at 21(alone). I'm now 27 and I could never move back in with my parents. I was always independent and wanted to make my own rules.
    I think it depends on the person though. If my son wanted to move out at 17 I would freak.I think its normal for women to want to get out of dodge ASAP though, you can't have 2 grown women in a house together. There can't be 2 queens of the castle.
  • Miepke99
    Miepke99 Posts: 31 Member
    I moved out at 17 as well. My sister is 20 and still lives at home. I guess the time is right when you feel ready, really... I don't think there's a specific age limit on moving out.
  • lisapr123
    lisapr123 Posts: 863 Member
    I finished high school at 18....got my associates degree and my first "real job" at 20. Bought my own house that year too. I was lucky enough to find work with a good company that paid for my Bachelors degree. Now I'm 35 and our mortgage is almost paid off.

    I know I did things a little early, but if the young adult is financially educated I see no reason they can't do something similar.

    Most of my cousins/siblings finished school (college, for most of them) and moved out within a year or so. The last couple yrs have been tougher in terms of finding stable employment, but they've made it work.
  • Pixi_Rex
    Pixi_Rex Posts: 1,676 Member
    I moved out at 17, I had a job, a car and an apartment that I rented alone.
  • Val_from_OH
    Val_from_OH Posts: 447 Member
    I think that during college kids should start living on their own (i.e. get an apartment with friends), maybe with some financial support from the parents. After that, its time to fly baby! I don't know how I will feel if my children graduate college and are unable to find employment. My sister and I had both started our careers by the time we graduated.
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
    I was 13 the first time I moved away from home. I worked as a nanny (with the parents in the house. This was a very large family) in exchange for room and board. I went home about 6 weeks later because I got tired of all the kids. My family was going through a rough time when I did this. My parents eventually divorced when I was 15, but the tension in the home was very high a couple of years before they decided to divorce. This is why I chose to leave for a while. I needed a break from all the hot tempers and mean words.

    I moved out for good when I was 18. I did live with my mom for about 3 months when I was 21 due to a relationship breakup, but I only stayed long enough to find an affordable apartment. I paid my mom rent while I stayed at her place.
  • branson101
    branson101 Posts: 173 Member
    I moved out when I went to college and moved around a bit. I moved back in with my mother after my dad died and I filed for divorce from my husband. She needed company and I needed her support. I am still there 14 years later. I've raised my son in a stable household and was able to finish my education. Now she is aging and I intend to be there for her. I hate the way the most of America has this mindset that if you don't live apart from your parents you are some kind of loser. I've seen many cultures where multiple generations living together is the norm and expected. Move out only if you really want to and its the right thing to do, not because society tells you that you just have to! And remember all the times that your parents took care of you as you were growing up with emotional support and fixing your boo-boos and caring for you when you were sick and choose to do the same for them. I didn't get that chance with my father and I will regret that for the rest of my life.
  • 75in2013
    75in2013 Posts: 361 Member
    Depends on where in the world you live.
  • kt_kat_88
    kt_kat_88 Posts: 74 Member
    I moved out when I was 20 when I got a full time job. A year and a half later, I decided to go to college. So I moved back home because with full-time work and school, it didn't make since to have a place if I was never home. Plus it majorly help out my mom financially. I'm 25 now and just graduated last May. Officially today I am telling my mom that I am moving back out. Wish me luck.

    I also have a brother and sister, 18 and 27 who still live at home as well
  • Otterluv
    Otterluv Posts: 9,083 Member
    My 19yo son is still living with us. He is going to college locally, and it would be silly for him (or us) to spend money to for him to live separately. Rents in the area are fairly high, and the rental vacancy rates are incredibly low. There are chore expectations for him, but other than that we treat him like the adult he is and don't tell him what to do.

    If he plays his cards right and lives at home until he graduates, he could graduate with very little debt. Giving up some freedom now for financial freedom later is a good trade off, IMO.
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
    I don't think there's any certain age to move out because everyone's circumstances are different. But at some point it becomes a sponging off your parent(s) situation and it's time to grow up and become self-supportive. If you're an adult living with your parent(s) and aren't at least working toward something that will make you financially independent, then something's wrong.
  • darkguardian419
    darkguardian419 Posts: 1,302 Member
    I moved out when I was 15. My kids will have a better home than me, and an opportunity to live at home and go to college (on my dime) but they will be working and paying their bills to include groceries, cell phone, car insurance, and RENT. However... if they choose to sit around and not achieve anything, they'll be out the day they graduate highschool.

    This is definitely something that depends entirely on the individual and their situation...
  • Faery_Dust
    Faery_Dust Posts: 246 Member
    I moved out at 15yrs old. I was in a relationship with someone older than me who had his own place. I was a nightmare teenager lol.
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    I moved out at 18 when I left for the military. When I got out of the military I moved back in for a time to get my things in order, pay off some debt, start school, etc. I think I lived at home for about a year after I got out of the military...I was 22/23 y.o. and I paid my parents a small amount in rent and provided for my own food for the most part. As soon as I was able I moved out with some friends and rented a house.
  • JUDDDing
    JUDDDing Posts: 1,367 Member
    However... if they choose to sit around and not achieve anything, they'll be out the day they graduate highschool.

    Yeah. I won't be providing any hammocks.

    But they are welcome to stay as long as they are on plan - whatever that is as long as it makes sense to me.
  • Kimdbro
    Kimdbro Posts: 922 Member
    18.... I can't imagine wanting to stick around at home after that. Time to get out, learn and forage on your own. I moved out at 18 then when my roomate bailed I had to move back for a bit due to financial burden... but moved out again 6 months later. It's about finding yourself and making your own life.
  • As soon as possible.

    I find dating very difficult because I am a woman who owns a home. I do not want to date a man who lives with his parents. If you are over 30 and living with your parents, that is seriously pathetic. If you are taking care of a sick parent or you own a home and your parent(s) live with you, that's a little different. But at 30+, if you do not have your life together, you should NOT be dating.
  • EDesq
    EDesq Posts: 1,527 Member
    In your opinion, what is the age that you think you should move out of the parental home and do your own thing?

    I know that most times money will be a problem because you can not fund a place of your own....

    ,,,but let us suppose that you had the money and opportunity to move out of the parental home...would you stay or would you go and what age do you think is right?

    Maybe you are a parent and you do not want your kids to leave?


    Of course if you go away to College then during College in you will live away. But unless you have a conflict with Your Parents' Rules then there is no rush to move out UNLESS they want you to. If Parent(s) and Child (ren) get along and feel comfortable with the set-up ENJOY. Now where the problem will come in (especially with males) is what OTHER people think, especially the opinion of women he dates. For many women, a man living with Parents after, say 27-30 yrs old may indicate to them that he has a problem with independence, may be cheap and/or lazy, may be weak in some manner or can not "finn" for himself, as well as many other psychological and emotional problems. Sorry guys, but women STILL expect you to "light up the world" and conquer it, living at home in your Dad's or Mom's success does NOT give an Alpha Male image or even a Beta Male positive image. Strangely, it is acceptable for a woman to stay home until she gets married or for Life.

    I moved out after College and Law School, and a couple yrs of saving money...about 26 yrs. old. Had enough maturity, financial knowledge and experience to take care of Myself. It was a good decision to wait a minute.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
    In your opinion, what is the age that you think you should move out of the parental home and do your own thing?
    15, 16.

    If you can work and drive, gtfo.

    That's what I did.

    ETA - Children staying longer is why we have so many special snowflakes and a messed up society.
  • snazzyjazzy21
    snazzyjazzy21 Posts: 1,298 Member
    I'm 21 and still living at home. Since I working in the same town my parents live in, there's no point moving 2 minutes down the road and pay $400 a month in rent just for the sake of moving out of home.
  • Ed98043
    Ed98043 Posts: 1,333 Member
    I'm 21 and still living at home. Since I working in the same town my parents live in, there's no point moving 2 minutes down the road and pay $400 a month in rent just for the sake of moving out of home.

    It would be cheaper for me to live with my parents too, only I'm 47. Where do you draw the line? There just comes a point when people should strike out on their own. It's part of growing up.
  • snazzyjazzy21
    snazzyjazzy21 Posts: 1,298 Member
    I'm 21 and still living at home. Since I working in the same town my parents live in, there's no point moving 2 minutes down the road and pay $400 a month in rent just for the sake of moving out of home.

    It would be cheaper for me to live with my parents too, only I'm 47. Where do you draw the line? There just comes a point when people should strike out on their own. It's part of growing up.

    I have moved out of home, twice in fact. I moved back once on my mothers request because of serious mental health problems and a second time because I lost my job and my flat in the Christchurch earthquake. I'll move out when I've finished my studying and feel secure in my mental health. I don't see how still living at home is somehow stunting my growth, or stopping me from growing up. I pay bills, do my own cooking, washing, cleaning, pay for my own car and fuel. The only thing I don't do is live with flatmates instead of family.
  • redladywitch
    redladywitch Posts: 799 Member
    Great question! The child can stay as long as he/she has a job or goes to college. There might be other house rules.

    Both of our kids were asked *cough* to leave because they didn't follow house rules. Daughter was 19 1/2 and son was 18 1/2.