WOMEN AGES 50+ FOR SEPTEMBER 2013
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Hi, again,
Well, as it turned out, I spent most of the afternoon writing a condolence letter I had been putting off. The husband of a very good friend from years ago died last week. She and I were just about inseparable at a time when both dh's would be gone for long periods and I treasured her friendship. Truth be told, I leaned on her a lot. Over the years I did tumble to the fact that she was a "one upper"...........you know, if you did something, she knows someone who did it way better, has one that's newer, bigger, etc. etc. I was more and more put off by this behavior and one day made a phone call to verify one of her more outlandish claims and then made the error of letting her know that I knew she outright lied to elevate herself in a contest that existed only in her mind. End of friendship, but it was a long time coming. I was very surprised to hear from her at all and in the course of the short conversation she actually snapped at me (took something completely wrong, maybe on purpose) so I'm not sure why she called at all. Anyway, I'm glad it's written and sent; but it wasn't easy; re-reading and evaluating every word; he was a larger than life person and I thought the world of him, her, not so much toward the end.
Robin..........it is sooooooo great to hear you happy with the new job!!!! You put up with a lot to get there.
Sue.........We did a powder room remodel last fall so I have a little of an idea what you are going through; very frustrating!!
Vicki...........congrats on needing new pants!!
Have a good evening, everyone,
yanniejannie0 -
Well I thought I had finally worked through all the stress I had felt earlier and life was moving along as usual. Today, being Thursday we went out to the nursing home. I took stuff to give MIL a manicure, she has always been so proud to have her nails done and that hasn't happened in a long time. She loved ruby red polish. She is more confused, not eating anything, so thin that when I was putting lotion on her hands and arms I noticed her rings weren't on. We looked in her drawers and couldn't find them so I checked with the nurses and they didn't have them. They were both costume jewelry but she loved them. i realize that with how much weight she has lost that they cold have slipped of and got lost in the covers. But I also realize that being on a Medicaid unit on a nursing home that there are thefts. I made up my mind that I had to call her daughter. The whole time I had her on the phone it was about her own surgeries, how people have botched them up and causing her so much pain and problems and now need to be redone again, blah, blah, blah. Finally I interrupted and just said that some how she has to put all of that aside and see her Mom. She needs to have one final opportunity to say goodby while her Mom is still alive. I told ehr that there is no more opportunity for her to have a meaningful conversation with her Mom. She gave me some excuse as to why she couldn't get out to her birthday in June like she promised. I just hope I don't lose it against her at the funeral home. She will now have to deal with her own demons about her lack of respect for her Mom. She can n longer get any of her Mom's meager Social security check and her attitude has shown that the entire 9 years she as been at the nursing home. So now I'm afraid my husband will blow up when he finally sees her. All I know is I'm about to lose my Mother in law and I am grieving. It is so hard for me to deal with my SIL through this. We are going to start going out to the NH more often. His brother is also going to do that. So between us we will be there about 5 days of the week. His other brother who does do the dutiful visit on Mother's day and birthday hasn't returned my phone call yet. I'm sure that when she dies these 4 siblings may never see each other again.
There does seem to be quite a few wonderful victories from my VIt F friends to celebrate I'm just not in the celebrating mood tonight.
Joyce0 -
:flowerforyou: Renny, I read “The Happiness Project” after it was recommended by a woman on this thread and I loved it……it made a profound effect on my life….I hope it does the same for you.
:flowerforyou: Michele, I don’t like eating in restaurants because of the mine field on stuff on the menu and the challenge of finding something that works for me, but I especially don’t like the comments that people feel free to make about my food choices……I feel the same frustration you do about my yard project----there’s so much I want to do and the weather and the rest of my life keep getting in the way of doing it.
:flowerforyou: Heather, if being a “feeder” works for you, then keep doing it……..I am the opposite….I let people know that if they come to my house, the food will be very plain and simple and not in huge quantities…..I have a friend who is abstinent in OA for over 20 years and her husband is a diabetic who eats gluten free and she tells people “you’re welcome to eat with us, but you probably won’t like what we eat”….how nice that you were able to deal with the boilers that weren’t working before it got too cold…..now when it gets cold, all will be well.
:flowerforyou: Grandmallie, how cool to get together face to face with one of our Vitamin F friends…congrats on your new smaller size.
:flowerforyou: Patceoh, as you add more challenge to your workouts and redesign your eating to be more nutritious, and find more opportunities to be active, you’ll find the results you seek with weight loss…it’s all about getting healthier and developing a lifelong plan.
:flowerforyou: Katla, how great that your boat is done and more progress is being made on your deck project.
:flowerforyou: Sylvia, thanks for the reminder to reach out to help others….every small kind act makes a difference
:flowerforyou: Vicki, I went through several sizes of pants as I was losing weight……just bought the next smaller size in the same brand and style so there wasn’t much “shopping” to do.
:flowerforyou: Yanniejannie, when I have to write a difficult letter, I have a trusted friend read it first to make sure I’ve been kind and left out any negative “tone”……it helps to have the opinion of someone who is balanced but unaffected.
:glasses: I get my teeth cleaned by the periodontist three times a year and today was the day. They are very nice but the process is stressful and I worry about choking or not being able to breathe. It always feels great when it’s over and I remind myself that I have all my teeth and they are in good condition. When I got home, the dogs jumped all over with joy that I’d be taking them for a walk.
Barbie from NW Washington
“If it’s important to you then you will find a way, if it’s not you’ll find an excuse.”
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Rhonda – way to go on your time!
Pat – thanks for your kind words.
Sounds like those of you into scrapbooking need to plan a get-together.
Jill – there are others here who make jewelry, too.
Sue in TX - come on to Georgia!
No gym tonight – worked until 8p instead, but I am off now until Monday, since I worked last Sunday. Tomorrow I’m getting a hair cut and going to the gym. Then, folks from DH’s work are coming over Saturday for a get together, so we have some chores to get done before then. (The party last December was great fun – it is a good group of people, so I’m looking forward to seeing all of them again.) Sunday, we’ll see – have to set up communion for one of the services, but after that I don’t know.
Well, need to decide on something to eat tonight. Hope everyone has a pleasant evening and a good night’s sleep.
Gail, metro ATL0 -
Joyce - so sorry to hear about your MIL. We lost my MIL about 18 months ago. She lived with us for the last couple of years and I still occasionally turn to say something to her. Hopefully your DH will stay in touch with the one brother who does spend time with her. I haven't seen one SIL since my brother passed away - just could not deal with the way she treated her MIL (MY mom!). It's been 13 years and I have no interest in being in touch. I know I could not be pleasant or polite if I did see her, so it is truly better for both of us.
Barbiecat and Michelle - know the feeling about eating out! DH had a shot in his neck today at 4:00, so could not have food for 8 hours prior to the procedure. Needless to say, he was starving when it was over. We stopped at Outback for supper on the way home. I looked up what I had once I came home and Oh Lord! How do they get that much salt into their food! I'll be floating in water for a few days.
Watching for the trees to turn in western MA
Jill0 -
Today's random act was paying for an elderly lady's meds at Walgreens. THAT was really fun! I slipped the clerk a note telling her what I wanted to do along with my credit card and she took it from there. She had as much fun doing it as I did, and the lady never did know who did it. I just sat in the waiting chair like I was waiting for my own stuff. It only came to $25 or so. It could have been a lot worse.
Puppy Bruno brought a stink bug inside, put it on he area rug and proceeded to roll in it. Talk about stink! Guess who had to get a bath, and who had to clean the rug?
Tonight for supper I cooked chicken breast chunks in Mrs Dash Chipotle seasoning, added reduced sodium kidney beans and a package of instant brown rice, which has no sodium. It was pretty yummy.
Tomorrow I have to go get my teeth cleaned too. Mine is only twice a year, but that's plenty if you ask me.
Goodnight ladies!
Sylvia0 -
Wow cityjane - We must be on the same wave length... I also made Hake for dinner with new potatoes only I served spinach for the greens! So, what are planning for tomorrow :-)
Michele - I too struggle when we go out to eat... Hubby likes to go out once a week... I always go with good intentions and end up being bad... My will power has its highs and lows!!!!!!!!!!!
Vicki - Way to go on needing new pants!!
Joyce - Sorry to read about your MIL, that must be so difficult to go through... It is so hard to lose a parent even a MIL... It is sad her daughter is acting like a jerk... You know what they say about karma! You are a jewel to care enough to make your MIL's last days about her...
Well work is crazy and have not had much me time... I have to come back and catch up on all the posts! Have a great night all!
Sandy - Boston0 -
Joyce - I'm so sorry to hear about your MIL
Sylvia - I love your daily random acts of kindness. A few times I've paid for the person behind me when I'm in the line at the drive through at Tim Horton's. It gives you a little rush for the day, doesn't it?
Granmallie - congrats on the smaller size...yipee :happy:
I didn't make it to the Y tonight. I had to take my DD to her plates for her car. She's never done it before so was anxious so I went with her. We stood in line what seemed like forever. Then went over to pick up pita's for dinner. I checked out the website and made my choices based on what would still be within my calorie limits. yummy. I'm actually relieved to take the night off, I am very tired. Sandy from ON 0 -
Hey everone. It was a stormy and rainy day and much cooler. It’s starting to feel like fall now. Today was weigh in day; I lost 0.5 pounds so I guess the biscuits and gravy didn’t hurt too much LOL. Last night I felt awful and went to bed right after dinner, today I felt fine but now feel kind of weird again. Maybe I’m trying to come down with something…hope not.
DD#2 is at work and DD#1 has been texting both DH and me today. She’s been trying to make a doctor’s appointment (I’m not sure what for) and can’t figure out the phone system. Her English is so bad she doesn’t understand the options so I was trying to tell her to listen carefully until you hear “Press 1 to make an appointment,” but that’s a while down the message. She’ll get it hopefully.
Sandy: hope that virus just keeps on moving on! You don’t need to be sick! My asthma always acts up when I catch a cold!
Rhonda: fabulous results on your 5k ! I’m impressed!
Rori: so glad you are ok in the floods. I’ll keep your friends in my prayers!
Joyce: I too like that fuji apple salad at Panera. You are a kind DIL.
Barbie: glad your lunch went well! Good for you to take such good care of your teeth. I hope to be an old lady who has never had a cavity…so far so good!
Renny: keep us up to date on the book!
Michele: you will have to post some pics of you in your dress
Grandmallie glad to hear you are feeling better and lost some more weight! Would love to meet some vitamin F pals here! Hope you two have a good time
Heather: I will gladly row off several pieces of that cake! Your soup sounds fabulous also!
Patceoh: I too find it harder and harder to get rid of this weight. I am often disappointed at “only” losing 1/2 pound of so. I really
shouldn’t be, especially since my fitness buddy at work keeps gaining! I think if it comes off slowly it will stay off better, but it’s hard not to be impatient.
Katla: I hope you are pleased as punch with the boat
Sylvia: what a delightful idea! I think I will try to join you! I don’t always see “strangers” every day but I’ll try my best when I do.
Jill: thanks for your suggestions! I have not been drinking oj every morning, so I kind of plan for when to have it because I just love it! I hadn’t thought about stuff like cutting fruit in half and eating it at two different times which my dietician suggested. I guess it just will take a lot of work.
Yanniejannie: I know the food and glucose thing doesn’t really make sense, does it? My worst blood sugar is 2 hours after lunch even though that isn’t always where my carbs are heaviest. Maybe there is some circadian rhythm thing at work too. Writing your letter was an act of kindness after your friend snapped. Maybe she was stressed?
Jewels: you joined by posting. Come back often!
Robin: your new pic is adorable.
Sue Yes I do feel stressed! We got most of the furniture back, but the table is in the office and it took 3 big guys turning it sideways to get it in there. We also can’t even lift the edge of the curio top. That will probably take 4 guys! I guess we’ll be hiring some help soon!
SueSouthDakota: I hope your shoulder feels better soon. That would be so discouraging to me. Keep your chin up!
Vicki: I saw that too about the Platte flooding in western Nebraska, I didn’t even consider that possible. Is it going to be all the way to GI? I think your cool weather arrived today!
Well I’m off to make tomorrow’s grocery list and dream of Heather’s bread slathered in real butter! MMMMMMMMMMMMMM Take care Meg from stormy Omaha0 -
bump
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Pat - I forgot to mention, whenever I look at collagevideo, I really only focus on the "Staff Favorite" DVD's. I've found that if they weren't a "staff favorite", it seems that many times things like cueing aren't good.
Heather - that's just plain mean that you're going to hide the cake from Meg and me! (But it's probably the best idea) You know, I think I'm probably a "feeder" also. I'm constantly asking people if they want more, I've even gone to the point of actually putting more on people's plates. I'm like you, I don't like doing things at the last minute. Another reason that I don't like to do it then is because if there's a problem, if the recipe doesn't turn out well, if you make it at the last minute you don't have time to make something else. By making something ahead of time, if it doesn't come out well, you can make something more.
Did about 40 minutes of ASAP DVD (weights). Tomorrow the plan is to do this walk/jog program that I got in *Fitness* magazine.
patceoh - when I take the water aerobics class, I use the webbed gloves. I'm thinking that right now when I'm just exercising in the water by myself, I'll wear my water shoes. I remember the first time I wore them, I couldn't get over how much resistance they added. It took a lot for me to go sideways
There's this dress on ebay that I'm looking at for the dinner, but I'm so afraid that it'll just barely fit, and maybe be a little too small. I wish they had it in the next highest size.
Well, Jessica left today. You know, I'm missing her cats. But they've been here for 9 weeks, it's time for her to have them.
There was a mixup at the Green Room. See, I really find that Thurs. a.m. shifts work best for me. However, someone already signed up so I took the afternoon shift. Well, the gal who signed up and I worked together the other day and I asked her if she could change. She said that she'd have to check her calendar and if she could, she'd mark it on the sign-up sheet. Well, when I went there wasn't any mark so I figured it just didn't work for her. Evidentally, she came in right after me and put down that we could switch. Well, we were talking with Jessica and the executive director called wondering where I was. I explained that I assumed it didn't work for her so they called the other lady. If we weren't talking to Jessica, I would have offered to go in. I took a cinnamon swirl cake for Lynette to take to her accounting group's dinner next week. Then I volunteered at the Green Room (this is the local theater, I primarily work in the box office but I might start ushering). Came home and Vince had put in the landscape border and he was starting on putting down the landscape fabric so I got some more rocks, sifted them, and we put them down. Then we powerwashed the patio on that level. Boy, was it filthy! There were some places where even the powerwasher couldn't get the patio clean. A storage unit for the pool supplies, robotic clean, etc will be delivered tomorrow.
Vicki - the murder mystery is a game that about 6 of us will play. Should be very interesting, I'm looking fforward to it. I think I do have to lector at the church that night so I might just leave early
Rhonda - congrats on completing the run!
Rori - prayers for your friends in CO
grandmalle - congrats on the great NSV
katla - while Jessica was here I wanted to make something that she could snack on, so I had a box cake mix. Normally, I don't like box mixes. Anyway, the directions called for 1/2 cup of oil. I almost died when I saw that. I remembered that one time I substituted the oil in brownies with silken tofu, so I decided I'd give that a try with the cake mix. Well, I didn't tell Vince or Jessica that's what I did. However, Jess said "ma, this is so moist, what did you do different?". I just said that I didn't do anything different. Even Vince couldn't tell there was tofu in it. If they knew, they wouldn't eat the cake. So I "accidentally on purpose" forgot. I'm going to take some to the Y with me tomorrow just so they can try it. Gotta do it tomorrow because Vince has almost finished the whole thing! It does feel good to do things yourself.
Sylvia - what wonderful things that you did!
jewels - jump right on in
Robin - you talked about graveling the side yards. Are you going to put down landscape fabric first?
Joyce - you are so wonderful to be thinking so much of your MIL's needs and calling her daughter. You have my utmost respect
I'm also going to take the rest of the low fat oatmeal raisin cookies to the Y. I have to get them out of the house.
Denise called today. Seems that Pete's mother is going to give them some furniture. What worries me is what's going to happen in the future when the mother isn't around to pay bills, give them things, etc? They only have a high school diploma. Well, I'm a worrywort, what can I say?
Michele in NC0 -
never did get to see Kevrit yesterday, she has my number but something must have come up.. up a lb today,but probably sodium,not gonna worry..
Today is the DH and I 16th anniversary..we have had our shares of ups and downs ,but love him to pieces. I am up had my warm lemon water, dressed and going to the gym0 -
Good morning all
DH had another crisis this morning, but I made him get on the gym machines and go off to the doctor. He was trying to ration his sleeping pills and of course they weren't working. He now has some more and is feeling better. It wasn't as bad as last week, but a bit of a set back.
I was irritated because I have the house to clean and the last of the cooking to do, but I am nearly done now and he will hoover this pm.
I hope to give the patio weeds a spray this pm as we have a couple of dry days in store.
I went online last night and bought myself 2 pairs of thick, winter tights. I haven't worn tights for years as when I was bigger I found them too uncomfortable. Hence I never wore a skirt, especially in the winter. These have good reviews for comfort and have no wool in them as I can't wear wool. Here's hoping!
Then I got the bit between my teeth and bought a long sleeved silky tee shirt with a lace yoke, in black. I thought I could wear it in Rome. Then I went completely mad and ordered some black "treggings"¡!¿? I think I have forgotten I am nearly 64! What I might get next week is buy a mini skirt ( not too mini) from my local store. That will go with the tights, but be more covering for wearing out and about. I am only taking cabin luggage to Rome so need a capsule wardrobe.:blushing: :laugh:
My major problem is shoes as I wear trainers 99% of the time. I have to wear orthotics in my shoes for any distance at all so have trouble finding suitable shoes. I would love some smart, comfortable shoes I can wear orthotics in.
I have got to decide soon what to have for my birthday. I am considering getting a smart phone, with DH paying the rent for the first year as a present. Then the phone would be free. Otherwise I can get him to buy me the phone and do PAYG. If I dont go down that route I would like some shaggy, furry boots. To wear with my tights and skirt!!,
Must get on with dusting behind the bed in the guest room.
Love from a beautiful sunny Hampshire UK0 -
Good morning lovely inspiring ladies :flowerforyou:
Happy Anniversary Granmallie :flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:
Michelle - you are one busy lady. I look forward to having as much energy as you :happy:
Meg - My DS still avoids picking up mail from my place that he knows is bad news. I have learned to accept that it is his problem and somehow he will deal with it. Just remember that not dealing with it is still a decision. I pray your DD learns a lot quicker then my DS. I'm just glad I kept the lines of communication open. When he was 15 - 25 I thought I would lose him and never see him again. He chose to live on the street and sleep on couches of friends instead of living with my by my rules. I have many gray hairs from him :laugh: We have a better relationship today. He's turning into a wonderful young man.
Yahoo I'm happy that it's Friday. I get back into the pool tomorrow morning for an aqua fit class. Tonight I will go back to the Y for more strength training.
I had a wonderful conversation with my DS last night. He has recently moved in with his GF. She seems to be timid about family functions. I laugh at that term for us because family functions consists of 3 of us, DD, DS & me. She doesn't seem to want to come out with us next weekend for my birthday dinner. I told him to tell her that I wanted her to come. He says she doesn't want to impose because it's my birthday dinner. I hope she changes her mind, I'd really like to get to know her better. I don't know how to make her more comfortable around us.
I'm at work so I better get at it :laugh:
Have a great day everyone. Sandy from ON 0 -
sitting with the boys, poor chester is having issues,got a case of the itchies, razor burn and allergies, will spray him with cortisone spray before I leave for work..
took them for a walk around the block, they love it...
having guacamole with pretzels,cukes for lunch, I like to snack during the day rather than have meals,but try and keep it under the calorie count...
Kevrit- sorry we weren't able to meet up, hopefully we can get together soon0 -
Good morning, ladies,
Another beautiful day here, supposed to rain tomorrow.....I am planning a bike ride later, have not done much since Tues. in the way of exercise as my left hamstring seems not happy.........I think "locust position" in yoga did it in at one of the classes so I'm giving it a bit of rest. Got weighed today, haven't been quite as vigilant since reaching goal, satisfied to be one pound over; need to fine tune this new calorie level. Trying about 1400 instead of 1200cals. Taking newspapers to animal control, going down to the stables to look for needed paperwork for an event, grocery shopping, and WILL finally get to the paperwork for the running group. Just looked at that sentence..........see, already forgot about the blasted bike ride, and this is how exercise does not get done by moi.
Katla.....This is late, but thank you for your kind words a couple days ago about my end of life hopes.
Joyce........You are a rock for your MIL, doing all you possibly can and then some and caring more than her own kids. We never regret doing for others, just that we didn't do enough when it's too late...........and it sounds like her own will have plenty of regrets.
Barbie.........Thanks for the very good advice on letter writing; I have handled things that way in the past.......in fact, the man who died had been one of my favorite sounding boards years ago.
Granmallie.........Happy Anniversary!!! I think we ALL have our ups and downs.
Heather.........your new clothes sound wonderful and very in style.........I find myself quite thrilled with skinny jeans and now have 3 pair!!!
Sandy........I'm glad your son came back to you. The gf is not going to feel more comfortable by staying away.......that's just common sense. Hope she does come because it's the only way she's going to get to know you all and attain that level of comfort; it sure won't happen by staying away........but we all know that kids have some strange thought processes...LOL!
Gardengail and Atlanta people.........I just realized I have a very good friend down there, in a town named White, Georgia; is that near anyone?
Very best to everyone.........yanniejannie0 -
Hi ladies,
So I am 53 and never had a problem losing weight in the past. Now I find myself 40 lbs overweight. Anyone have
advised on how to stop these crazy menapausal craving?0 -
TGIF~~was having computer issues at son`s,so couldn`t read or post.
Have a good day!
hugs
jane0 -
HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE.
DARLA FROM OHIO
GO BUCKS0 -
Hello Ladies and welcome the 1st day of fall –
We have been lucky and have been experiencing some absolutely beautiful weather. I wish it could stay like this for all of fall. Me and hubby plan on going to an orchard / garden tomorrow and pick some vegetables/fruit and also pick up one or two pumpkins to decorate. Fingers crossed our nice weather holds out.
My morning workouts have gone by the wayside. With this change of weather and it staying dark out longer, I have been hitting the snooze button versus getting up and getting my workouts in. I’ve been squeezing them in when I get home from work, but always feel like I am pressed for time as hubby wants to eat dinner pretty early. Oh well, at least I am getting the workouts in. Joyce – congratulations on your NSV, it is so nice when we have an outfit we’ve been wanting to wear and it finally fits. Pat – if you end up making those Christmas Cards I would love to see you post a picture of them. Sandy – sounds like you are doing a great job of getting to the Y and getting your zzz’s. Michelle – thanks for the potassium tip, I had also heard that about banana’s. Rhonda – congratulations on completing your run, how wonderful. Grandmallie – congrats on those loose fitting capri’s!!!! Sylvia – I like your acts of kindness. So right, they cost nothing but do mean so much. Sue in TX – I definitely feel your pain. Especially when things don’t go exactly as planned. I think I still have 2-3 more weeks before the master bath is open for business (yes intentional pun :laugh: ) Yammiejannie – I think writing that letter may bring closure in two ways, to his passing, but also to the end of the friendship.
Hope everyone has a wonderful and productive weekend.
Suzy0
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