"You're still fat"

Goal179
Goal179 Posts: 314 Member
edited November 3 in Getting Started
I have to share something that I have kept secret for a few days.
For the first time last friday, I actually got to the 4 mile mark during my walk. This was a huge, huge, huge accomplishment for me. All of my MFP friends know that I am about 100 pounds over- weight, but I have been working very hard and I am dedicated to being a better me. I am down 15 pounds and will probably hit 16 this week. With that said, I was at the end of my walk last Friday and I turned around to head back home. I came to a stop light. While at the stop light, I didn’t want my heart rate to drop, so I did a slow jog. I am not the most graceful person and I know that I am a sight to see when trying to run. But I was doing my best and I was proud of myself. While I was waiting at the light, a car full of cute “skinny” girls pulled up to the stop light. They rolled the windows down and made an effort to make sure I knew they were laughing at me. When the light turned green and they began to drive off, the person closest to me yelled, “You’re still fat”. I immediately stopped in my tracks and slumped over in sadness. How could people that I don’t even know steal my joy? How could people that I don’t even know be so cruel? Why did they even care? Why make the effort to go out of their way to be hurtful? I just don’t understand. This incident didn’t deter me. I am still just as focused on my goals as ever. But I can’t deny that it had an effect on me. When I got home and looked in the mirror, I said to myself, “you ARE still fat”. Sometimes the truth hurts. I obviously have a weight problem. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be doing this. But it is amazing how words either positive or negative can change your outlook. I don’t know what my point is here. I just want everyone to know that when you say “good job” or “you can do it”, it means more to me than you will ever know. Words are powerful. I won’t drop a bunch of cliché’s and antidotes in this situation because you probably have heard them all. I wasn’t even going to mention this to my MFP community, but I decided that getting it out would allow me to move on. I found a great quote. See below and be nice to each other. =0)

“Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.” ~Shirley MacLaine
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Replies

  • Serah87
    Serah87 Posts: 5,481 Member
    Just keep at what you doing!!! YOU are doing fantastic job and forget those silly girls!! :flowerforyou:
  • CeleryStalker
    CeleryStalker Posts: 665 Member
    Karma has a funny way of working these things out. All the pretty, skinny girls that used to taunt me in junior high are now fat women with fat little kids. I wouldn't wish weight issues on anyone, especially a child, but when I see those mean girls schlepping around with their obese children, I have to wonder if they remember how terribly they treated girls that look just like their own kids, and can only hope they've learned how to be nice to someone regardless of their weight.

    I'm proud of you for working through the shame those strangers hurled at you. Keep up the good work!
  • Karma
  • The only person you need to be listening too is yourself so keep up with positivie self talk and you will continue to see successes! Great job!!!
  • qtgonewild
    qtgonewild Posts: 1,930 Member
    first off i just have to say congrats on the 4 miles. i just got to 3 miles on sat and was so damn proud of myself. so what an accomplishment. secondly, i am sorry you encountered such asshats. i know it hurts. but you are doing something about it and i am damn proud of you. get it girl. prove em all wrong.
  • MadBabysMama
    MadBabysMama Posts: 373 Member
    That was such a mean thing, sounds like something they learned from a movie, it's so cliched "mean girl." At least you recognize you're not doing this for those silly people and others like them but for you and yours.

    When I see people running alongside the road, I always say out loud in the car, "Good for you!" no matter their size. They can't hear me, so maybe I should roll down my window and let them hear my positive words. I guess I worry they might be offended or annoyed, as if maybe it sounds condescending.
  • Shooter219
    Shooter219 Posts: 38 Member
    I have so been there. One time it was with my husband....it was one of the most heartbreaking and humiliating things in my life. BUT, you went out there and kept at it!!! You are the stronger person here, you are worth more than they could hope to be!! You've got this! Rock on with your bad self!!! :glasses:
  • 86muffintop
    86muffintop Posts: 69 Member
    Honestly, I am so proud of you- and I don't even know you! Any time I see anyone jogging/walking/moving while I am driving by, I think in my head "YOU GO GIRL (or boy)!!"- and I get even more happy when I see people who have some weight to lose working it. Ignore those silly little girls and keep up the good work. You are better than them!
  • madiken4
    madiken4 Posts: 13 Member
    It breaks my heart that people can be so thoughtlessly cruel. Just because they may be pretty on the outside, doesn't mean they are good on the inside, that's for sure. Don't worry about them, I'm sure they all have their own problems.

    Keep up the good work! And feel free to add me if you'd like. I'll be happy to cheer you on during your journey!
  • BusyRaeNOTBusty
    BusyRaeNOTBusty Posts: 7,166 Member
    Oh dear. I'm sorry you went through that. Some people just suck. You're doing great. Keep up the good work.
  • seltzermint555
    seltzermint555 Posts: 10,740 Member
    Those girls are horrible horrible human beings and I'd like to cut them - not literally - but emotionally, like they did to you :-(

    Don't let that get you down.

    Sometimes when I am wearing my tight exercise pants, which I think look quite good on me, I imagine that some rude stranger will say "you're too fat to wear those" or something similar. If they did, I would be prepared. It is sad that our minds "prepare" us for attacks like that. People suck.

    Last spring my fiancé and I were walking downtown in our city and I had an outfit on that made me happy. Bright fuchsia dress, grey leggings, lime green cardigan. I was carrying a floral umbrella in bright colors. These people pulled up to the curb and laughed so hard at me. It really hurt. But later the same day I got a bunch of compliments from strangers on my "adorable dress" or "great colors"...not everyone's bad.

    HUGS!!!!
  • Triciad811
    Triciad811 Posts: 268 Member
    Honestly, I am so proud of you- and I don't even know you! Any time I see anyone jogging/walking/moving while I am driving by, I think in my head "YOU GO GIRL (or boy)!!"- and I get even more happy when I see people who have some weight to lose working it. Ignore those silly little girls and keep up the good work. You are better than them!

    This !!!!! Mean people suck... and unfortunately they will always be out there. You are on such a positive journey to a better you. You cannot control what others say or do .... you can only control how you react to their actions. Stay focused and positive. We got your back!!!!
  • IanBee93
    IanBee93 Posts: 237 Member
    Those girls are ska nks. Keep your head up! :flowerforyou:
  • clgreene2
    clgreene2 Posts: 6 Member
    Good Job! You just keep doing what you are doing!


    My dad once told me that much of life is about learning to suffer fools. When I was 12 I thought it meant putting up with a soccer coach that I didn't like. Some 30 years later I realize he was talking about all of the mean, small minded, insensitive, short sighted, hurtful, people who willfully project their own pain onto me. I have translated this bit of my fathers wisdom for my young daughter to "Don't let the turkeys keep you down."
  • JeanSoCal
    JeanSoCal Posts: 23 Member
    I'm glad you shared with us. This brought tears to my eyes. Words do make a difference, even if it is for a brief period of time. I felt your sadness by the cruel words and actions of those girls. I've been there when I thought I was on top of the world because I was doing what I knew was right for me and my goal towards a healthier me and weight loss. Then had someone say, "why even try, you'll just gain it back again". Yep, that is pretty crushing. Well you are doing a fantastic job and don't let others steal your joy! When you look in that mirror say, "wow check out that awesome inspired girl who has the world ahead of her!" You are moving and grooving and I'm so happy that you are on your journey to make every day a better one for you! Sending you a big hug and lots of "atta girls" for strength to continue your fabulous journey! :flowerforyou:
  • sarasmiles124
    sarasmiles124 Posts: 138 Member
    I am the same way as you. Statements and the way they are worded affect me emotionally and I remember after having lost 40 lbs, some guy driving past me when I was waiting to cross the street and told me I needed to 'Get my fat *ss to a gym' then proceeded to call me a porker and pathetic. I had been feeling fantastic that day. I was wearing a smaller size in everything and I had just done an awesome work out. Just don't let people get to you. People generally only pick on others when they feel insecure themselves from my experience. Your doing a great job and you will get to where you need to be. Keep believing in yourself and capabilities and don't listen to the negative.
  • fat2strongbeth
    fat2strongbeth Posts: 735 Member
    Karma will get them in the end! Just keep telling yourself that you are doing amazing.
  • wolverine66
    wolverine66 Posts: 3,779 Member
    Well, that chick is still a cruel jerk - and you are working hard, what is she doing to change? nothing.

    she'll still be a dumb jerk tomorrow, and you, my friend, will be less fat tomorrow. :-)
  • cathiggs
    cathiggs Posts: 21 Member
    Well done for getting to the 4mile mark that is fantastic you should be proud of yourself! and try and turn their negitive comments around and turn them into positive motivation! and as others have said people who do these things usually insecure themselves and to make themselves feel better they pick on other!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
    stop thinking about it!
  • MstngSammy
    MstngSammy Posts: 436 Member
    I have to share something that I have kept secret for a few days.
    For the first time last friday, I actually got to the 4 mile mark during my walk. This was a huge, huge, huge accomplishment for me. All of my MFP friends know that I am about 100 pounds over- weight, but I have been working very hard and I am dedicated to being a better me. I am down 15 pounds and will probably hit 16 this week. With that said, I was at the end of my walk last Friday and I turned around to head back home. I came to a stop light. While at the stop light, I didn’t want my heart rate to drop, so I did a slow jog. I am not the most graceful person and I know that I am a sight to see when trying to run. But I was doing my best and I was proud of myself. While I was waiting at the light, a car full of cute “skinny” girls pulled up to the stop light. They rolled the windows down and made an effort to make sure I knew they were laughing at me. When the light turned green and they began to drive off, the person closest to me yelled, “You’re still fat”. I immediately stopped in my tracks and slumped over in sadness. How could people that I don’t even know steal my joy? How could people that I don’t even know be so cruel? Why did they even care? Why make the effort to go out of their way to be hurtful? I just don’t understand. This incident didn’t deter me. I am still just as focused on my goals as ever. But I can’t deny that it had an effect on me. When I got home and looked in the mirror, I said to myself, “you ARE still fat”. Sometimes the truth hurts. I obviously have a weight problem. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be doing this. But it is amazing how words either positive or negative can change your outlook. I don’t know what my point is here. I just want everyone to know that when you say “good job” or “you can do it”, it means more to me than you will ever know. Words are powerful. I won’t drop a bunch of cliché’s and antidotes in this situation because you probably have heard them all. I wasn’t even going to mention this to my MFP community, but I decided that getting it out would allow me to move on. I found a great quote. See below and be nice to each other. =0)

    “Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.” ~Shirley MacLaine


    :noway::brokenheart: :mad: :explode:

    Do. Not. Give. Them. The. Power! DON'T!!!! People like that are only trying to compensate for something lacking in themselves. They see themselves badly so they try to bring others down to their level. DO NOT LET THEM!!!

    Oh that makes me grrrr.....

    You have got this!!!!


    oh yeah.....Buy some headphones/ear buds some great music that brings you up and turn it up loud to block out the negativity.

    You would be surprised how good music can lift you and even give you that extra UMPH of energy to push yourself harder!!


    Please add me! :love:
  • darrensurrey
    darrensurrey Posts: 3,942 Member
    A possible retort:
    "You're still fat."
    "But one day I'll be slim however you'll always be stupid."

    But frankly, they're not worth your energy. Focus on your goal.

    Take up strength training and know that you could probably crush them but choose not to. :D
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    What yoovie said. Drop it.


    Fat is something that happens over time through inattention. It's hard to beat and you're doing it.

    Being a nasty little ***** is something that occurs by choice and poor breeding.

    Press on.
  • MstngSammy
    MstngSammy Posts: 436 Member
    Well, that chick is still a cruel jerk - and you are working hard, what is she doing to change? nothing.

    she'll still be a dumb jerk tomorrow, and you, my friend, will be less fat tomorrow. :-)


    ^^^^^^THIS!!! :drinker:
  • When confronted with people like that, I think of it this way: I would 100% rather be fat, smart, and a good person than be a skinny b***h who has no soul and is cruel all the time. I can (and YOU can and ARE) lose weight - you can't fix *kitten*.
  • jrniven
    jrniven Posts: 74 Member
    They might be skinny, and in your opinion cute... but they sound ugly as hell to me. Keep up the work. One day you can laugh in their faces.
  • You are already better than they are; because you are out there trying! grain of salt as they say! keep up the great work & stay positive - it will catch up to them (later in life when they hit 40 & there's nothing they can do about gravity)
    :smile:
  • Nilasaurus
    Nilasaurus Posts: 68 Member
    Thanks for sharing this. For a long long time, I have been shy about telling people that I am dieting or working out for the fear of the derisive, judgmental looks saying - but oh, doesn't look like it. Every day I don my shoes, my ipod, grab a water bottle and walk to the gym, feeling all the eyes burning into me on the way and inside the gym. I am the only fat person at the gym. And I look like a wobbly elephant when I am doing cardio, I really want to run but I feel so shy about it, that I just walk on the treadmill. But lately I have started to stop caring about it all. I proudly tell people that I am going to the gym, and even though I don't sweat at all, I work out like a pig for hours every day. The same people who were smirking at me, when I stepped in for the first time, they see me come in every day, day after day, pumping iron & doing my cardio. And I don't know if it's true or not - but I tell myself, that they admire me for my tenacity. I tell myself that when I will lose weight right in front of their eyes, they are going to tell stories about that 200+ lbs girl, who lost 100 lbs. I think it's all really in the mind, whatever negative life throws at us - it's for us to make it positive.

    It doesn't matter who's laughing today. What matters is not giving up & having the last laugh. The ones who are laughing at you, are only the ones who are going to tell stories about your achievement tomorrow. Kill it girl!
  • bloominheck
    bloominheck Posts: 869 Member
    Karma

    Yes this. Damn girl you need to be proud, 4 miles is a kick *kitten* walk. Well done and you will get there. Those silly biotches are just that. You keep going! I am so happy you are doing this. You will never regret it!:flowerforyou:
  • Commander_Keen
    Commander_Keen Posts: 1,179 Member
    don't worry, they will get divorced when their husbands look for a younger model
This discussion has been closed.