Marriage - is it that important?

I don't believe in god or all that crap so it's not for me but if it makes my future wife happy, then whateves, just an expensive party!

Doesn't have to be. I don't want that at all and I'm not particularly religious. But marriage is still important to me.

I'll probably elope or some version of that and maybe have a few people over for dinner to celebrate.

A wedding =/= a marriage.

I just don't see the need lol


Edit: The ring is important to me, all that really matters.

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My husband and I have been together since my freshman year of high school. We had 2 kids. 2 years ago we finally decided to get married. Both of our parents had been divorced and we just didn't see the importance. After realize the money we'd save on insurance and taxes we decided it was best (and it did kind of always bother me that my last name was different than the girls). So basically we got married for logistical purposes. I didn't think a piece of paper would matter....but I can honestly say I have never felt closer to him than I do now and I really love that all of our last names are the same now. I think it was a good example to set for our kids as well.

This is pretty much how it was/is for me and my Hubs too. We don't have kids but we were together for 11 years before we finally decided to get hitched. We've been fully committed to each other from the start but were both children of divorce and had plenty of friends who were into their 2nd marriages already (early 30's) so we had that whole "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" mentality. We'd talked about it before but the reason we finally decided to do it (other than our love and devotion to each other) was to save money on certain expenses. Anyway, I also never realized how much of a difference it really made...I mean, we'd been living together for years, sharing expenses, had both our names on the mortgage, and of course the lovey dovey stuff too...but I feel like we have an even deeper bond now. Pretty cool!

only for tax reasons and health insurance. commitment is much more important and you don't necessarily need marriage for that.

Marriage is commitment. Lack of marriage = lack of commitment.

to a certain extent, maybe, but I still don't believe you need a marriage to prove commitment (especially not when the divorce rate is over 50%).

I don't believe in god or all that crap so it's not for me but if it makes my future wife happy, then whateves, just an expensive party!

Marriage pre-dates modern religion. It was first created as a sort of contract between men and women. The woman offered sexual exclusivity for the man to pass on his genetics and the man provided protection and food.

Being with my husband is the most important thing, married or not. We got married for the benefits of marriage (taxes and insurance as mentioned before). I do like being able to say that I'm married to my husband though. It sounds nice to me. I do not think it is meant for everyone and to each their own is always how I'll feel on this subject.

only for tax reasons and health insurance. commitment is much more important and you don't necessarily need marriage for that.

Marriage is commitment. Lack of marriage = lack of commitment.

Sure, if you want to oversimplify and still come to an incorrect conclusion. :laugh:

It is to me. Not sure I can really articulate why. I guess legality and tradition.

While I am not religious, I am a bit of a traditionalist, so I personally find it important from a traditional standpoint and a legal standpoint.

However, I do not find it important in the context of committment. I think that it really changes nothing in a relationship, especially if you are already living together and have children. At that point you are only doing it for a piece of paper.

I don't know about that ...

I've lived with someone for nearly nine years. We don't have kids together, but we both have kids. We're starting to talk marriage and it's kind of scary. We're definitely committed. It isn't just a piece of paper.

But I don't think you can understand that until you live it because the idea didn't scare me until it started becoming reality.

Once you are married, you will feel and act exactly the same. You might feel happy and squishy on the inside a bit, but I rather doubt it will do anything, in and of itself, to enrich your relationship.

Marriage is ordained of God. There is little else that matters more. It of course has to be done the right way to be as great as it can be. The break down of the family is a large part of the problems in the world today. A strong marriage doesn't guarantee happiness and peace but it sure helps

I'm not really sure I understand the question....

My marriage is important to me...marriage may not be important to someone else.

I don't believe in god or all that crap so it's not for me but if it makes my future wife happy, then whateves, just an expensive party!

My wife and I aren't religious at all and did not have any kind of religious ceremony for our wedding. It was rather small, just close personal friends and family...the wedding itself was an exercise signifying our commitment to each other, with that promise being witnessed by said friends and family.

Hilarious take on it http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/23/aziz-ansari-buried-alive_n_4151850.html

Its important to me. Im not religious at all.

It depends on your situation. I've been married for 34 years and I know that if I wasn't, I (we) probably would have given up easily when we had some serious problems. I think that trying to hold on to what we call marriage is what kept us together. To some, it's just a piece of paper, but not us.

Same here, you could be telling my story. Married 34 years, about the 10 year mark it got bad. If we hadn't been married we would have called it quits. But, we worked through it for a couple of years and came out even stronger, and even more committed. That wouldn't have happened if we had not been married.

It used to mean a lot to me, but some issues have come up and now I feel kinda trapped. Yes I know I can/could get a divorce, but to me it is more complicated. I still love him and don't want to hurt him, me, and the kids. But I just don't want to be with him anymore, as a wife.

I got married I think too young, so IMO, I say wait until you are older. I didn't get to experience being on my own, and am having regrets. BUT, that is just me - not everyone!