Wedding Ring Debate

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sullus
sullus Posts: 2,839 Member
in Chit-Chat
I wear 2 rings; a standard wedding ring on my left hand, and a claddagh on my right. For a couple years, I wore neither, because they didn't fit. Well, I lost enough weight to start wearing them again, but then something happened; I kept losing weight and now they are too big. They were spinning around, falling off - I've had to fish 'em out of the disposal, trash at work, etc ..

Well here's the debate. To solve this issue, I started wearing them on my middle fingers instead of my ring fingers. My wife however, is insisting that I get them resized so that I can wear them on the correct fingers, but I've decided I kind of like them on the "wrong" fingers. (I have to say I kind of like the .. "Hey, what's up with the rings?" .. well, I used to weigh over 300 .. "nooo ****. wow.") This debate has not gotten heated, nor do I think it will .. it just exists, and comes up from time to time.

So anyway I figured I would post the question here because MFP'ers tend to be quiet and reserved in their opinions, and will treat me gently, with dignity and respect.

Does it REALLY matter which finger you wear the ring on?
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Replies

  • ThePlight
    ThePlight Posts: 3,593 Member
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    She might feel that other women may believe that you are single. I'm going to be getting a tattoo, so won't be a problem for me, at least.
  • sizzle74
    sizzle74 Posts: 858 Member
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    I would respect your wife's wishes.
  • PennyM140
    PennyM140 Posts: 423 Member
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    Eh, my husband lost his ring in a pond years ago. Neither of us really felt like spending the money to replace it.
    Sometimes I wear mine, sometimes I don't. It's just a piece of jewelry to me.
    But if it's important to her, ask yourself if it's worth fighting over.
  • exquisitelyimprobable
    exquisitelyimprobable Posts: 8
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    I wouldn't care, but it's not my opinion that counts. If it is important to your wife, I would have them resized when you are at maintenance.
  • ekz13
    ekz13 Posts: 725 Member
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    traditionally yes, and it probably wouldn't matter to her, but couple that with your weight loss, increased confidence, etc, and now the ring on the "wrong" finger she maybe getting a bad inner feeling about the whole thing .


    it's a small thing, but it's important to her.
  • notdieting
    notdieting Posts: 116 Member
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    Dang boy! Get your ring back where it belongs! Of course it matters which finger it's on or we would just choose whichever we wanted at the ceremony.

    I have had the same issues with my engagement, wedding and eternity ring but would never dream of wearing them anywhere else....they will be re-sized!
  • TriShamelessly
    TriShamelessly Posts: 905 Member
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    I ended up buying a $20 ring off amazon to replace my wedding band. As soon as I'm sure this weight is where I'll maintain, then I'll resize. Until I "splurged," I felt it best to either go without the band (as I did) or you can wear it on the other finger. Better options than losing the darn thing down a drain somewhere where you can't retrieve it. Best of Luck! (P.S. Your wife is always right regardless).

    Edited for typos.
  • SweetTrouble_
    SweetTrouble_ Posts: 933 Member
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    Happy wife, happy life...go get your rings sized.
  • Aquabird
    Aquabird Posts: 38 Member
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    I don't always wear my rings (I work in a bad neighborhood and don't feel safe with them on and then don't take them to Cheer practice on the weekends since I spend a lot of time catching falling bodies and don't want to jam my fingers with them on ). My husband doesn't mind since he knows I am not doing it to play off that I am single.

    I like that you use the different fingers to start a conversation on your journey, but I think that your wife's feelings trump that.

    If you don't want to get them resized, you can by inserts that will make them tighter on your fingers so they don't fall off.
  • SmexAppeal
    SmexAppeal Posts: 858 Member
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    You want gentle??? Bahahhaaaaaa....

    Seriously though, people who lose lots of weight love to tell their story of success. They have every damn reason too! And you should be proud of yourself. As long as the issue doesn't bother or hurt her, then keep doing it and keep telling your story!!!
  • SugarBaby71
    SugarBaby71 Posts: 3,630 Member
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    From my point of view, if it matters to her maybe you should consider that.
  • see_turtle
    see_turtle Posts: 19 Member
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    I would not want my husband to wear his ring on another finger. He works at a college and even with his wedding ring gets hit on by (male and female) students occasionaly. I feel as though the ring is an symbol to the rest of the world and to ourselves. Ask your wife!
  • charissh
    charissh Posts: 91 Member
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    I'm kinda the same as you.

    My engagement ring is way too big and it's now on my middle finger, it's safer there and it was expensive so I'm not sure I trust it to get resized!

    But I'm getting married next year and it's important for me to wear a wedding ring so I'm gonna get one which fits nicely :)

    It really depends on you and what it means to you, and what it means to your wife. If it's an important sign of commitment for her you might want to get them re-sized x
  • felcandy
    felcandy Posts: 228 Member
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    But if it's important to her, ask yourself if it's worth fighting over.

    And is a conversation piece more important to you than making sure the woman you love is happy?

    Just compromise. Get the wedding band resized and wear the other for conversation :P
  • StinkyWinkies
    StinkyWinkies Posts: 603 Member
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    it wouldn't matter to me which finger my SO wore his ring/s on...but having been married to a man who wasn't allowed to wear rings on the job, it was a moot point...that being written, you wanna be right or you wanna be happy?

    PS Orthodox Greeks wear them on the Right hand ring fingers...just sayin'
  • rmt5580
    rmt5580 Posts: 9
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    My thoughs exactly.
  • shastacrystal
    shastacrystal Posts: 262
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    Happy wife, happy life...go get your rings sized.

    THIS!!! Plus you can still find a great way to tell your amazing weight loss story;)
  • ItsCasey
    ItsCasey Posts: 4,022 Member
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    I think if it matters to your wife, it matters. Period.

    I have a friend who married a Ukrainian woman, and apparently in the Ukrainian Orthodox tradition, you wear your wedding ring on your right hand. He is an American Christian, but because it was important to her, he wears his wedding band on his right hand.
  • bajoyba
    bajoyba Posts: 1,153 Member
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    I think it really just depends on how important it is to your wife and what the two of you decide together.

    My husband has lost his wedding ring TWICE and is now on his third ring. Each time, he went a few months in between without any ring at all, but it was important to both of us that he have one, so we replaced it. He also gets hit on pretty frequently by people of all genders/orientations, and although neither of us have trust issues, we view our rings as an outward symbol of commitment.

    Now that I've lost as much weight as I have, my wedding/engagement rings are VERY loose and often slide around on my finger. I intend to get them sized, but for now, I went to the grocery store and bought a $10 ring to match in a smaller size and plopped it on top of the other two rings to hold them in place. It works perfectly, but I'm not sure many guys would accept that as an adequate solution.

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