Honesty About How You Lost Your Weight

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  • TheCredibleHuIk
    TheCredibleHuIk Posts: 26 Member
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    I ate less.
  • Luv2Smile55
    Luv2Smile55 Posts: 133 Member
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    I think you should let it go. You are two different people on two different journeys. If you keep being entangled with her actions you will not be freed up to be successful for your own initiative.

    This for sure. We are walking our owns paths in this life. I do need to let it go. I am a Christian and I know what I could truthfully do and what's she's doing isn't it. That being said I will do what my conscience allow and she will do her what hers allow and never the two shall meet.

    I thank all of you for your input. I don't necessarily agree with some of you but that's why I asked. I was looking for perspective and I got just that.

    So again ... Thanks!
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    What about us people makes it okay to cheat & go get this surgery. What weight loss takes is a healthy day by day work your hardest effort. That fat lady that had this surgery & WHOOP-magically come off
    You don't really know much about this topic do you? Your comment is pretty ignorant.
  • KnM0107
    KnM0107 Posts: 355 Member
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    I think lying is wrong regardless of what it is about. If you are a liar, then what else deceitful are you going to do?
    So if you asked your significant other if you were overweight in their eyes and they say yes, you'd be absolutely cool with that? Just wondering.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal/Group FitnessTrainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    I think this would depend on the relationship. My husband and I are brutally honest with each other. When I was obese, my husband didn't lie to me about it. He didn't call me fat or anything but he was concerned with my health and he did talk to me about it. He wasn't judgemental and he offered to help in any way he could. I wasn't mad. He was being honest and because of his honesty I finally started taking care of myself. I love him for being honest and I do feel that because we are completely honest we have a stronger relationship.
  • Mr_Knight
    Mr_Knight Posts: 9,532 Member
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    This for sure. We are walking our owns paths in this life. I do need to let it go. I am a Christian and I know what I could truthfully do and what's she's doing isn't it. That being said I will do what my conscience allow and she will do her what hers allow and never the two shall meet.

    Another incredibly judgemental statement...

    I don't know why this issue is bothering you so much - but it for sure isn't about her "lying", so it might be worth having a heart to heart with yourself to figure it out.
  • mg_89
    mg_89 Posts: 189 Member
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    ugh.. that's a real bummer. I would have a problem with that too. The principal at my child's former school did this.. everyone KNEW she did the surgery.. there's no shame in that.. why not just own it? Every time I see her I think.. she's just full of ****.

    I love reading how people did it and are doing it.. it gives hope and motivation to do the same. Thanks for sharing.
  • GBrady43068
    GBrady43068 Posts: 1,256 Member
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    I look at it as being my chance to help someone who might realize they need to lose weight and are looking for info from someone who's "done it" so I would be honest. Depending on how close I am to the person, I might or might not volunteer that alarm over being "borderline" for diabetes triggered me to start making actual changes.
  • keltoi93
    keltoi93 Posts: 51 Member
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    I've no problem saying how I've lost weight, I skip breakfast everyday, replaced all my liquids with water (expect going from coke to diet coke) and counted calories, it really is that simple.
  • sloth3toes
    sloth3toes Posts: 2,212 Member
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    I'm working my *kitten* off, lifting, boxing, doing yoga, biking (I was running until my knee started acting up), and I'm proud of that. I have no issue telling people that, and how I started watching what I ate, but didn't starve myself... even allowed myself cookies, ice cream, wine, pancakes, bacon, etc.

    Those who are dishonest typically are insecure/ashamed of others' reaction. But it doesn't affect you in any way, shape, or form. She's an adult. She's made her bed. Worry about you.

    I totally agree. It is NONE of my business and I DO worry about me. We are Christians and setting others up for failure is what really bothers me. Her "lying" let's others believe that if they "cut their carbs" they too will have her success. SO not true. The real reason she lost weight and lost it so quickly is because she now only has 20% of her stomach left. Eating 300 calories a day or less is what got her to where she is. Yes, it's true that the surgery enabled her to eat so little. SO ... all of this being said, she should own what she did, be proud of herself but BE HONEST about how she did it. Don't set others up for failure because simply following a low carb diet won't make you lose over 100 pounds in 5 months. Enough said.

    So, you're saying that by this woman
    simply smiling and saying she lost it following a low carb diet.

    that she is
    setting others up for failure
    50px-Purple_question_mark.svg.png

    Because everyone is gonna run off and start following random low carb diets, because this one lady said that's how she lost a *kitten* ton of weight in a big ole hurry.

    That's like saying that everyone is gonna go out and buy a juicer and start juicing random fruits and vegetables 'cause they saw some rich guy on a documentary do it for 60 days.

    Oh wait.... that's what I did.... never mind.

    :blushing:
  • hannahpistolas
    hannahpistolas Posts: 290 Member
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    Are you sure this isn't more of a jealousy issue? I'm only guessing because you're on a weight loss site, as well.

    While I agree that lying is aggravating, the fact of the matter is there's a stigma associated with weight loss surgeries. People instantly think that the person was moribldy obese; or, even worse, they think they were just too lazy to lose weight the regular way and/or that the person "cheated" their way to success.

    In the end, it's her story to share (or not share)-- not yours.
  • carolina822
    carolina822 Posts: 155 Member
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    You have to be honest with yourself before you can be honest with others. Maybe she's conviced herself about how she lost her weight. Maybe she is ashamed of how she lost it, which she shouldn't be. My mom had gastric bypass surgery and she looks great. Sit down with her and talk to her about and hear her explanation..

    Unfortunately she thinks lying is fine. When I said something to her she got super defensive and has no plans of "owning" what she did. I guess she thinks people are gullible enough to believe her "story." NO one loses weight THAT quickly without starving or surgery.

    Why do other people think it's any of their business how or why she lost weight? If she were prancing around singing the virtues of eating right and exercising without being prompted, that would be one thing, but if other people ask her and she doesn't feel like talking about it, she could credit it to pixie dust, and that's her prerogative.
  • Sabine_Stroehm
    Sabine_Stroehm Posts: 19,263 Member
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    I've no problem saying how I've lost weight, I skip breakfast everyday, replaced all my liquids with water (expect going from coke to diet coke) and counted calories, it really is that simple.
    Glad it's going well for you. Hope you're able to maintain your loss, and congrats on having no other health issues that get in the way.
  • tiggerhammon
    tiggerhammon Posts: 2,211 Member
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    I would have said, "and I'm losing mine without the help of surgery."

    And, this is probably exactly why she doesn't want to tell anyone.
    THIS is exactly why someone in her shoes would be scared of some people's responses.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
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    if it was my brother, i'd be tempted to call him out on that.

    but you know, i think about it, and maybe it's just really embarrassing for your sister to admit that she was so far gone that the only way she could lose weight was by getting part of her stomach removed?
  • mamma_nee
    mamma_nee Posts: 809 Member
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    I hate LIES period!! And if someone lies and I know about it , I will call it out and embarrass the heck out of them LOL
  • samanthahix12
    samanthahix12 Posts: 179
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    This is a private journey and if I want to share how I did it, I will. If I don't, I won't.

    Therefore, if someone else lies about how they did it, it's not my issue.
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
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    Your sister's body is her business and hers alone. She didn't lie, she just omitted the fact that she was able to eat so little thanks to surgical help. When it comes to radical procedures that other's view as weak or vain one doesn't just want to come right out and make themselves vulnerable to judgement.

    Your sister confided in you, and it is your job to keep her confidence. If you can't share your most intimate secrets with your family and trust them to keep the secret, who can you trust?
  • jmadams111
    jmadams111 Posts: 145 Member
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    Its lying, but if it hurts no one, does it matter? I think a lot of folks, myself included, have their own self image tied to their weight that they need the boost they get from whatever attention they receive from losing weight. So let them enjoy it and maybe someday they will own up to what the really did......which from having known people who went thru the process, is still a major effort.
  • redheaddee
    redheaddee Posts: 2,005 Member
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    She probably doesn't want to have to justify herself to others. Also, it's none of their business really, and she's probably uncomfortable sharing her medical history.

    That being said, personally, I would be honest. But I am honest to a fault so there's that.
  • TheRealParisLove
    TheRealParisLove Posts: 1,907 Member
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    I hate LIES period!! And if someone lies and I know about it , I will call it out and embarrass the heck out of them LOL

    Society would collapse under radical and absolute honesty. If a person doesn't want to share this kind of very personal detail with an acquaintance, it is not your place to "out" them. Let them make their own decisions in their interpersonal relationships.

    I have friends like you, and I never share my most personal feelings with them. If you can't keep a secret, you are missing out on the closeness that can be achieved in a relationship.

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