I am the woman in the freeweights section of the gym

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Replies

  • Arne_becomesxXx
    Arne_becomesxXx Posts: 504 Member
    Nice written! There should be much more women in this section.
    Lot´s of this guys have a great respect to women that lift.
  • FrauMama
    FrauMama Posts: 169 Member
    Nicely written, and important for women (and men!) to read. Thanks for taking the time to write it.
  • SabrinaLily
    SabrinaLily Posts: 121
    I like being the only woman amongst the men. I can relate to them more than the stupid "spandex" women on the cardio machines. It is what makes me unique (at least in that gym).
  • Smashley1947
    Smashley1947 Posts: 129
    Love this post.

    I am using weight lifting (free weights) as the main focus of my new fitness regime. I get lots of cardio from skiing and swimming, plus I am training to run 5k.

    But when I go to the gym its straight to the weight section. I am actually switching gyms to be more of a standard gym.

    However also still a newbie and I know starting out I will be intimidated. Even though I am used to being in an all male environment.
    I got a couple new resources from this post. I am in awe of crossfit ladies and my goal is to starting using a barbell instead of just dumbells.

    I want to add that a lot of gyms and fitness centres have or will host a women weightlifting course or info session. It could be helpful for a lot of ladies wanting to try it out.
  • FrauMama
    FrauMama Posts: 169 Member
    I like being the only woman amongst the men. I can relate to them more than the stupid "spandex" women on the cardio machines. It is what makes me unique (at least in that gym).

    Ditto. And, as I walk past the cardio room every day, I always want to be like "COME IN THIS OTHER ROOM! You'll look so much better!"
    I've noticed, maybe over the past 10 or so years, a lot more women in the free weight rooms. That's good. Still, there will always be the cardio queens.
  • greenmonstergirl
    greenmonstergirl Posts: 619 Member
    I'm usually the only one as well. Minus the gaggle of girls squatting 20 lbs on the smith machine.


    Weight shaming? And how do you know that is only 20lbs?

    I'm going to guess by looking at the weights, or lack there of? I don't now about you but when I see a five pound plate and a five pound plate, I'm generally about to add that up.

    We all have to start somewhere and at least they are in that area.
  • californiabella
    californiabella Posts: 152
    saved for later read. thanks!
  • Jenn842512
    Jenn842512 Posts: 41 Member
    I am with you! Used to be intimidated but now I get in there and own it, knowing I'm working harder and seeing more results than most of the boys guzzling energy drinks, sitting on a bench doing curls.

    Here's to the Girls with the Guns!
  • 0nehappyheart
    0nehappyheart Posts: 120
    Bump!
  • nanefy
    nanefy Posts: 23 Member
    I really needed to read this today. I am severely overweight.....well, I've been working out for about 3 months now and lost quite a bit of weight, but also LOADS of inches.

    Anyway, I had my programme re-done and my instructor asked me if I was comfortable working out in the freeweights section and I said yes straight away, mainly because, I am willing to do whatever it takes to get the body I want and I will not be intimidated into not doing stuff because of my gender.

    HOWEVER - Today is my first day going it alone and I have to admit, I am terrified!! I think I would feel a lot more comfortable if I was thinner, but at 380lbs I not only feel intimidated by the folks in the freeweights section, I feel like a fraud!

    I know that I need to go in there to get the body I want but my goodness I could puke just thinking about it. The parts I am most nervous about are the sqauts on the smith machine and bench pressing on the smith machine. I can barely squat......like it's more like just bending my knees slightly and that's with no weight, just the bar - it's the fear of being laughed at more than anything - but I know that, to get better, I have to just push through it and do what I can until I improve.

    Anyway, I am really hoping that by going on Saturday night, it will be quiet!!!! lol

    So, wish me luck - hopefully I don't do something completely stupid :)
  • runforestrun35
    runforestrun35 Posts: 480 Member
    Great info.... Would love to start lifting, I am picking up the book you mentioned!!! Strength is beautiful!
  • kristarablue2
    kristarablue2 Posts: 386 Member
    LOVE this post!!! First time I went into what I call "the boys section," I was so nervous, I went in and walked right back out then got my courage up and went in again!!! Best thing I ever did for confidence. Now a lot more women are lifting at my gym, but tis was not always that way.

    You are absolutely right when you say be willing to be treated like a man, although I am all about someone objectifying me as I feel like it does not happen all that often, I get excited when it does...lol...on a side note, some of my favorite people I see at the gym all the time are men that I have met in the weight room....the guys are usually amazing and very willing to help spot if you need it really quickly and often super encouraging.

    Great advice for new lifters!!! I agree with all of it!
  • MissesForrester
    MissesForrester Posts: 66 Member
    BUMP!
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    I like being the only woman amongst the men. I can relate to them more than the stupid "spandex" women on the cardio machines. It is what makes me unique (at least in that gym).
    giggity.
  • kelly_e_montana
    kelly_e_montana Posts: 1,999 Member
    OP hit the nail on the head. If you're an attractive woman, naturally guys will look at you but just focus on your workout. Never made much sense to me why people care so much about what complete strangers, most of whom you haven't nor will ever talk to or see elsewhere, think of them in the gym. As long as you aren't completely butchering an exercise/using way too much weight/going to injure yourself, nobody pays nearly as much attention to you as you'd think.

    I do agree with most of the posts in this section but not so much this one. You must live in a much bigger town than me. Everyone is always bugging me while I'm running down the street or coming up to me at work or in the store asking if they know me from either work or the gym and it is annoying. The people I do know yell, "hey kelly" while I'm running to the point that I have resigned myself to the dreadmill and my bartending customers stalk me in the pool. Like they don't even go to my gym (they just stand art the outside pool doors) or if they do, they aren't swimming; they're just sitting in the chairs. So I agree that if you are in a bigger town and you go in the weight room, people don't care, but people are hassling me outside of the gym about what I am doing in the gym all the time. #smalltownproblems
  • Ely82010
    Ely82010 Posts: 1,998 Member
    I like being the only woman amongst the men. I can relate to them more than the stupid "spandex" women on the cardio machines. It is what makes me unique (at least in that gym).


    Oh brother, another woman shaming ladies than prefer doing more cardio than lifting. You are not unique butter cup, just different. Accept that difference and stop calling them stupid.
  • randomtai
    randomtai Posts: 9,003 Member
    I like being the only woman amongst the men. I can relate to them more than the stupid "spandex" women on the cardio machines. It is what makes me unique (at least in that gym).


    Oh brother, another woman shaming ladies than prefer doing more cardio than lifting. You are not unique butter cup, just different. Accept that difference and stop calling them stupid.

    oie_3025710beCgELO21.gif
  • kaotik26
    kaotik26 Posts: 590 Member
    I have to agree the first day is the hardest to overcome. Now I just do my thing and try not to take too long on the equipment so others can use it too!
  • nanefy
    nanefy Posts: 23 Member
    Woooooot just completed my first workout in the free weights section!!!!! Wasn't as bad as I had anticipated and so glad I did it :)
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    Woooooot just completed my first workout in the free weights section!!!!! Wasn't as bad as I had anticipated and so glad I did it :)

    awesome!!!! now that you've cleared that hurdle (which is where so many of us stop) you can make incredible strides with your body!
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
    Ugh, well, this thread has convinced me to research gyms. I feel utterly intimidated by this thing, but 2014 is the year of stepping outside of my comfort zone increasingly often and I need to do something about my measly muscle strength. Thanks for the great intro and all the uplifting comments, you are helping me change my life.
    You are scared, intimidated, don't feel like you belong? Fake it until you feel it.

    Great post.
    Here's a fabulous TEDtalk on actively adjusting hormone levels via body language:
    http://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are.html
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
    can you explain what your fear is? seriously- not being a smart *kitten*

    are you afraid they will all turn an point and laugh?
    that they are privately snickering to themselves??
    that you will drop weight on yourself and everyone will stare?

    Once you address those and realize- with the clear exception of the weight dropping issue none of those things really has a huge impact on you if they do those things. Think of the worst thing that could happen. maybe you split your pants? maybe they DO turn and literally point and laugh.

    how does that physically affect you? can you keep lifting? head phones on- eyes on the prize?

    Unless someone is physically stopping you- most of the hang ups people have are about being self conscious in front of others... in front of others YOU ARE ASSUMING "know more" and there for must be judging you.

    So even if- god for bid- someone did point and laugh- what's your reaction- just do what you are doing.

    But the reality is NO ONE is going to point and laugh at you. They are either just trying to figure it out themselves- or they are too busy working to care. People people watch- sure. and Everyone started somewhere- but you have to try first- just like they did once.
    My list:
    They think to themselves "Oh my god what is she doing here, how on earth does she think she'll pull this one off? Ridiculous!"
    or "Goodness how overweight she is, it looks godawful".
    They snicker at me not knowing how to use the machines.
    My pants split.
    My behind looks uncharming to say the least, in various weird angles.
    I will lift laughably small weights.
    I will cause an incredibly loud bang when dropping something.
    I will screw up royally when trying to help someone else, causing them to injure themselves.
    I will injure myself - in a most embarrassing way of course.

    I feel all these things and more because I'm so out of my element. Give me anything science/medicine related and I'll have the right attitude if I don't know something, but this is truly putting myself out there. I feel as self-conscious as in bars when people are staring. Did I mention I'm a true introvert? Asking for help in this kind of scenario is nearly beyond me and I'll need every bit of courage I possess the day I step into a gym with a free-weight section. It's all about losing my sense of control and I believe I need to take the academic approach, go read a book or two as suggested, because then I will know something in theory and will at least find some kind of common ground once basic vocabulary is in place. Yeah, I worry about stuff, sometimes way too much :) Thanks for asking those questions, JoRocka.
  • delicious_cocktail
    delicious_cocktail Posts: 5,797 Member
    I can relate to those feelings and fears. I wish you lived here so I could take you to a gym.
  • AglaeaC
    AglaeaC Posts: 1,974 Member
    I can relate to those feelings and fears. I wish you lived here so I could take you to a gym.
    :flowerforyou:
    You know the saying about taking the bull by the horns? I've narrowed my options down to two gyms! Boy does it pay off to visit uncomfortable-looking threads from time to time.
  • lilred806
    lilred806 Posts: 195 Member
    Bump to read later
  • LaurenEllexx
    LaurenEllexx Posts: 64 Member
    This was great! I agree with the go in with a plan. Also once you see that the men aren't worried about you,looking at you, whatever it's a lot easier! I've stopped feeling self conscious/intimidated once I realized that we are all there to get our workout in and leave.
  • dezb64
    dezb64 Posts: 109 Member
    I am usually the only women in the weight room although I do go at 5am. So there are not many people there at all. Now they are all used to me being there. I do have to say it was hard the first time without my trainer but I knew I had to do it if I ever wanted to reach my goal.
  • Springfield1970
    Springfield1970 Posts: 1,945 Member
    Great post.

    But I have to admit. I'm sick of the bewbie pumping "I'm a girl who lifts" "I'm a woman in the weight room" cheer leading

    I'm just so over it. I just get really annoyed- I'm not big on gender separation- we are all here to work. I tend to say- "there were only 3 of us last night at the gym"

    not- there was only 1 girl and 2 guys at the gym last night.

    it's just- I dunno- so forced. I got really annoyed- some guy at my new gym gave me a thumbs up at some point because apparently my workout impressed him.

    I wanted to take my head phones out and say- while I appreciate the comment- do you really give EVERYONE in here a thumbs up who does a great work out? Or just good looking girls who are lifting more than you? I go to lift. I'm a person. period. what I do is not special. Just go in- do the work and stop thinking you're **** don't stink. You're like everyone else there lifting.

    That being said- (and this was not a dig at the OP or anyone specific- just the general idea I guess) the original post IS excellent and is something that's been repeated over and over in countless threads.

    Have a plan
    Go in
    Do the thing
    Lather Rinse Repeat.

    I get you.

    I was fuming and toe curlingly embarrassed for the (new) guy that stood behind me while I was doing squats the other day, looking me up and down and gggggrrrrrrr the thumbs up in the mirror. All my gym buddies were looking at the floor. I felt like a child and oddly sexualised. The funny thing is, I was lifting similar weights to him. I think he was about 20. I'm 43.

    Guys please don't ever do this stuff! Don't look at our arses when we squat or dead lift it's so impolite and we are aware how much they stick out when we lift. Mine has it's own centre of gravity, small children rotate around it, don't give it any more attention.

    What would you have said? I think next time I'll do the same to him and stare at his groin and blow kisses at it.
  • shrewd1983
    shrewd1983 Posts: 23
    Make sure you have a plan, that is all.

    Who cares what other people think, say, or do at the gym? Be polite, don't be a fool, and all will go well. If you are concerned with people looking at you (why?) then work out at home, remember, you chose to go to the gym which is a public place, people have eyes, humans look at each other instinctively. Have a problem with someone at the gym? Take it up with an employee instead of the internet.
  • nanefy
    nanefy Posts: 23 Member
    Just wanted to post a quick update. I have since been back in the free weights section and I have to say - the fear has completely gone! It's a head game really - once you go in and realise that literally, no one cares that you are there, no one is pointing or laughing, you can just get on with it and do your workout.
    I had a problem with the smith machine and shouted some guy over to ask for his help............he hadn't a clue how to work the machine! lol - so some people are just as limited with their knowledge in there as me. I wasn't embarrassed asking and I thanked the guy anyway.

    For those who are still too scared to go in...............just do it.............if you're scared....do it scared - you will not die and you will be glad you did it!

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