Poll: Giving compliments at the gym?
Replies
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It would creep me out. I would think you're either weird or that you're hitting on me. Neither would be okay for me. I absolutely hate dealing with people's judgements - both good and bad. I hate the scrutiny.
I also hate people looking which is why I don't lift. Guys really need to focus more on themselves at the gym!
Not everyone that says something nice to you is hitting on you. All the guys in the gym are not staring at you. I hear that comment a lot from woman and its simply not the case. Some creeps might be staring, but its not the majority.
They may not be hitting on you but they are judging you. Judgement is awkward and uncomfortable. Even if its a compliment, now you know that not only is that person judging you, but they're doing it often enough to keep tabs. I find that weird and creepy.
No not all of the guys in the gym are staring at me. I don't assume any of them are. I catch them doing it which is how I know. I am surprised a person doesn't think you'll notice they're staring at your rack/behind/whatever when you're both facing the same mirror. A few have the decency to look embarrassed.
(And no I'm not wearing anything skin tight or low cut. Certain attributes just cannot be concealed.)0 -
I think it's okay, and it would make my day.0
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You don't know what everyone's intentions are for being at the gym. Sometimes it is used as a huge social outlet.
From someone named "shutupandlift" lol
:bigsmile:
The "shut up" part is meant for people's bullsh!t excuses, not because I think no one should ever speak to me in a public setting.
Like the bullsh!t excuse "hey, I work out at the gym every day, I don't know why I'm not losing weight" when walking at a chatty pace on the treadmill doesn't burn the calories necessary to make up for the food they eat? Seen that one quite often IRL.0 -
You don't know what everyone's intentions are for being at the gym. Sometimes it is used as a huge social outlet.
From someone named "shutupandlift" lol
:bigsmile:
The "shut up" part is meant for people's bullsh!t excuses, not because I think no one should ever speak to me in a public setting.
Like the bullsh!t excuse "hey, I work out at the gym every day, I don't know why I'm not losing weight" when walking at a chatty pace on the treadmill doesn't burn the calories necessary to make up for the food they eat? Seen that one quite often IRL.
I thought you don't talk to anyone at the gym?0 -
I'm with a lot of people on here and frankly I don't love being interrupted when I'm mid workout at the gym. However because of what I do (teacher) it's something that can't often be entirely avoided. I don't love the idea of someone watching me and commenting on my body/form/workout and if a complete stranger came up and commented it would probably freak me out. I have had acquaintances and friends come up and either comment or ask questions. As long as it's put in an appropriate way and time (i.e. NOT mid squat!) I'm ok with it and if ask, most times I'm even willing to help them learn how to do a particular lift/exercise if that's what they want.0
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It would creep me out. I would think you're either weird or that you're hitting on me. Neither would be okay for me. I absolutely hate dealing with people's judgements - both good and bad. I hate the scrutiny.
I also hate people looking which is why I don't lift. Guys really need to focus more on themselves at the gym!
Not everyone that says something nice to you is hitting on you. All the guys in the gym are not staring at you. I hear that comment a lot from woman and its simply not the case. Some creeps might be staring, but its not the majority.
They may not be hitting on you but they are judging you. Judgement is awkward and uncomfortable. Even if its a compliment, now you know that not only is that person judging you, but they're doing it often enough to keep tabs. I find that weird and creepy.
No not all of the guys in the gym are staring at me. I don't assume any of them are. I catch them doing it which is how I know. I am surprised a person doesn't think you'll notice they're staring at your rack/behind/whatever when you're both facing the same mirror. A few have the decency to look embarrassed.
(And no I'm not wearing anything skin tight or low cut. Certain attributes just cannot be concealed.)
So you've never found any guy at the gym even remotely attractive? I find that very hard to believe.0 -
I was at the gym today and i noticed another girl my age who looked really toned and fit. Like basically the kind of body I'm aspiring to have. I really wanted to go up to her and give her a compliment but I felt too awkward about it and didn't want her to be uncomfortable. I know I love hearing random compliments from strangers and it really motivates me, but...
Is it okay to compliment someone's body at the gym? How would you react? What's the least creepy/awkward wording?
Thanks guys!
What would there have been to compliment? Either way, unless you have said Hi to this person before in just other "normal conversation" its going to be awkward.
Compliment them on their progress? Or if they look the same then you are pretty much walking up to them and just telling them how attractive they look. From a complete stranger, thats nice, but then they have to see you at the gym all the time. Then when she goes there she might be like, "Oh theres that girl who came up to me that time just to tell me I look hot" =\
Lets just say you actually noticed she lost weight or has made some great gains on her squats. It may or may not be creepy. I suppose it all depends how cool that girl is. She might think, "Damn, how long has this girl been checking me out? I never really even noticed her until now. I wonder if she follows me to the store after I leave here?"
Or she might be like "Oh damn! Thats great! Thanks for noticing!!! Yeah, ive been working really hard and watching what Ive been eating throught the holidays. Its been a struggle, but thanks to someone as nice as you to notice, I feel its really paying off.
With human beings that we dont necessarily know, you never can tell how it will turn out. If you want to go up to her and talk to her, go ahead I think you should. Just be yourself and if thats not good enough for her then Cee her Next Tuesday.0 -
You don't know what everyone's intentions are for being at the gym. Sometimes it is used as a huge social outlet.
From someone named "shutupandlift" lol
:bigsmile:
The "shut up" part is meant for people's bullsh!t excuses, not because I think no one should ever speak to me in a public setting.
Like the bullsh!t excuse "hey, I work out at the gym every day, I don't know why I'm not losing weight" when walking at a chatty pace on the treadmill doesn't burn the calories necessary to make up for the food they eat? Seen that one quite often IRL.
I thought you don't talk to anyone at the gym?
Let's not fight. It's unbecoming, and I really don't want to. Honestly, I don't talk to people while working out or all sweaty, or in the shower. I do talk to them in the locker room, and out in public when we've seen each other at the gym, and there were people from work and other social situations I saw at the gym as well.0 -
I love compliments of all kinds. I wouldn't think the compliment giver was creepy unless they were drooling or fondling themselves while they were talking to me. So just don't do that.0
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Over the years, I've made some great friendships at the gym with people whose only commonality is that we enjoy sweating at the gym. Some people use it as social time and some use it to zone and work ~ some do both. I believe that paying attention to body language is important. If a person does not look at you - ever - then they may be zoning and I would hazard a guess that approaching them would be awkward for you both.0
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Being quite shy, I doubt I would compliment someone in my local gym unless I knew who they were. I have no idea how people would react these days.
I wouldn't react badly to a compliment given to me. I would blush and probably deny whatever they said, but I'd feel good overall
It hasn't happened yet, people in my gym tend to keep themselves to themselves.0 -
I ususally don't comment to the uber fit folks unless I've seen a transformation, BUT... I almost always make a point of commenting on progress I see in the everyday folks like me. I don't think we see how awesome we are or how much progress we've made because it is often sooooo slow, I mean gradual... I usually, in passing btwn sets, not during their workout say something along the lines of "Hey, I've seen you working lately and you are really leaning out" or "Obviously the new weight routine is working for you. You look great, the change is really noticeable"
You never know when someone is doubting or needs a boost. How hard is it to comment?0 -
I am sure that there are many thoughts on this.
However, for me, I show up and do my work out. I have zero interest in talking to anyone. I keep my headphones in and the Scorpions turned up loud to help avoid any human to human interaction!
Best!
Love this!!! This is exactly what I am like, The owner of our gym even tried to tell me to be more friendly and interact with other members, to which my response was..... why? I have enough friends lol0 -
I give the nod of approval.
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Honestly, I don't have a filter. I tell it like it is. So if I want to tell someone I think they look great, I'll do so. Take as a compliment. If you can't take a compliment then I think you have some "inner" issues to work on. Just give the compliment, make it short and sweet, and go about your workout.0
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I think a lot depends on your approach. It's going to be hard to do without coming across as creepy.
approach/delievery yes.
second part? no.
anyone who is remotely serious about lifting knows that compliments about body parts happen. Like man your quads are crazy or your delts are looking amazing.
it's standard and normal.
Yes some people are introverted- and we accept that not everyone likes public interaction- but if someone giving you a compliment about your hard work bothers you- then you need to either ACCEPT that it might happen- or remove yourself from those situations.
I made a very good friend one time by taking the time to walk up and say that's a great thing- i see your work- and I was wondering if I could borrow that thing (it wasn't a common lift so I felt uncomfortable just "stealing" it because I saw him do it)- turns out he is incredibly socially akward and suffers from PTSD and is a really wonderful human being who had no friends locally. It wound up being really a good thing- and we are friends to this day- he still struggles in social situations- but you have no idea- and you could totally make someone's day- or not. But it is what it is. If you are at the gym- someone might one day walk up and say- hey- your back is popping like crazy while you are doing those.
You don't have to make a big thing about it. It's not- it's just an observation. go with it and move on. Let's not make mountains out of mole hills.0 -
It's just a compliment people, not some hidden agenda to infiltrate your social circle. I compliment random people now and again if it's deserving. If they wanna be an *kitten*, or weird that a person would do such a horrific thing, then maybe they need to sort out their issues.0
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It depends on the delivery and I think it should wait until before someone begins their workout or has just finished and is getting ready to leave. A quick, well-delivered compliment that doesn't stop someone's workout or hold them up for a ton of time before or after is generally acceptable. I'd say if someone keeps their headphones on even while getting ready to leave or if they look rushed, then it's best to wait. Common sense and courtesy should apply to this. If someone is obviously trying to keep to themselves (headphones are a good indicator of this) or if they're really concentrating in the middle of their workout, it would be rude to approach, even for a compliment. Compliments are nice, but they can wait.
ETA: I'm super introverted and I don't take compliments well. But someone who is courteous to me and delivers the compliment well isn't going to completely ruin my day. In fact, they might just make me feel pretty good about my progress. I wouldn't be comfortable approaching someone, but I feel like I'm pretty approachable and if someone goes out of their way to compliment me, then it's just a nice gesture that I appreciate.0 -
Honestly, I don't have a filter. I tell it like it is. So if I want to tell someone I think they look great, I'll do so. Take as a compliment. If you can't take a compliment then I think you have some "inner" issues to work on. Just give the compliment, make it short and sweet, and go about your workout.
^this.
The only person responsible for your feelings is you. It's not my fault if I give a person a genuine compliment and they misinterpret it and it makes them uncomfortable.0 -
It would creep me out. I would think you're either weird or that you're hitting on me. Neither would be okay for me. I absolutely hate dealing with people's judgements - both good and bad. I hate the scrutiny.
I also hate people looking which is why I don't lift. Guys really need to focus more on themselves at the gym!
This is a woman talking about complimenting another woman. VERY unlikely she is hitting on her.0 -
You don't know what everyone's intentions are for being at the gym. Sometimes it is used as a huge social outlet.
From someone named "shutupandlift" lol
:bigsmile:
Lift big iron. Rest 3-5 minutes. Talk while resting. Or twiddle your thumbs, I guess.0 -
It would creep me out. I would think you're either weird or that you're hitting on me. Neither would be okay for me. I absolutely hate dealing with people's judgements - both good and bad. I hate the scrutiny.
I also hate people looking which is why I don't lift. Guys really need to focus more on themselves at the gym!
This is a woman talking about complimenting another woman. VERY unlikely she is hitting on her.
Welcome to 2014.0 -
People know why you are at the gym. Commenting on body might be taken as 'cruising' the gym. Dudes know themselves, since I see them staring at the mirror and rubbing their abs to lift the shirt slyly. Women know what they got as they wear those tiny black booty shorts on the treadmill. Focus on yourself and look for inspiration and see aspirational bodies but no need to tell them.
But they have to wear booty shorts and sports bras to be comfortable! Only guys can manage to be comfortable at the gym in shorts and a t-shirt.
[/quote
No, a loose t shirt and baggy sweatpants are always comfortable.... don't have to wear sports bra and shorts, unless your first prioiry is showing off your body.]0 -
These people are just rude. How do you develop and nurture a support system with such rudeness. Is this what you teach your children? No wonder we as a society are in trouble. My goodness!
An opinion is asked for and given but because it isn't all motivational rainbows and unicorns farting out pixie dust it is rude and we should be ashamed?
I think what people should be ashamed of is belittling or shaming others who are just being honest. That's like telling a kid they won't get in trouble if they tell the truth but they still get in trouble when they do.
To the OP - If it were just a passing statement, I'd feel awkward but appreciative. If someone started trying to strike up a conversation about it (whether asking about my diet or such while saying they want to look like me or whatnot), I'd feel really weirded out and probably a little annoyed if they do it in the middle of my workout.0 -
I am sure that there are many thoughts on this.
However, for me, I show up and do my work out. I have zero interest in talking to anyone. I keep my headphones in and the Scorpions turned up loud to help avoid any human to human interaction!
Best!
This is so me. Focused... music.... workout... don't talk to me!
this x 1000 -
OP: You like her look. When she's in a rest period, ask her how she got that look, because that's the general look you're going for. She'll feel complimented without you actually complimenting her. Plus, you'll maybe get some tips on how to get there and maybe make a new friend.0
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I am sure that there are many thoughts on this.
However, for me, I show up and do my work out. I have zero interest in talking to anyone. I keep my headphones in and the Scorpions turned up loud to help avoid any human to human interaction!
Best!
This is so me. Focused... music.... workout... don't talk to me!
this x 100
I would still give you a compliment in the gym.0 -
WOW, im just getting too old school to keep up it sounds like. Old days, people... WOMEN included LOVED having people compliment them on their well kept physiques. I work HARD to stay in shape...GUYS know how hard another guy is working to have a thin stomach I LOVE when someone notices my progress
AND I LOVE talking with people I don't put myself in a shell with headphones and "do my thing" and get out of there. You have to be kind to your fellow man. TALK TO PEOPLE BE APPROACHABLE yourself ...It isn't JUST about you. Sorry,, but its not.
How do you ever make friends? Oh let me guess, you don't "need" anymore friends. THAT is the bggest way today you are fooling yourself It says you think youre "all that"
It doesn't mean JUMP in bed with me if someone says wow youre looking great!!
WOW
I am usually too out of breath to talk to anyone...or I am focusing on next set ...0 -
It would creep me out. I would think you're either weird or that you're hitting on me. Neither would be okay for me. I absolutely hate dealing with people's judgements - both good and bad. I hate the scrutiny.
I also hate people looking which is why I don't lift. Guys really need to focus more on themselves at the gym!
This is a woman talking about complimenting another woman. VERY unlikely she is hitting on her.
Personal experience: I have had a woman hit on me at the gym. More than once. You do know about lesbians, right?0 -
I am sure that there are many thoughts on this.
However, for me, I show up and do my work out. I have zero interest in talking to anyone. I keep my headphones in and the Scorpions turned up loud to help avoid any human to human interaction!
Best!
This is so me. Focused... music.... workout... don't talk to me!
this x 100
I would still give you a compliment in the gym.
would you buy me beer and wings for the game too ??? lol 0
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