Action offends the inactive

And if it does, so what? No problem here, folks, move along.

I keep reading this trying to decide if the author is serious. I really don't see people in my life offering me food, or expressing concern, or asking me to skip a workout as them being out to get me. Nor do I think that anyone else really cares enough about my eating and fitness plan that it would make them feel bad about themselves or that they do feel bad about themselves and their choices. Maybe I just lucked out in the friends and family department.

This

I guess it how you look at things. My coworkers offering me chocolate is just that, an offering, a sweet gesture.

And, that's the best way to be, but, if you can't be that way, then do it to spite "them." Lol!

I really hate to say it about her, but my own mom is one of the tempters. We work together, and she used to leave treats and snacks for me on a regular basis. After asking her several times not to leave me anything, I finally had to sit her down and just tell her that it feels like subtle sabotage and it's not helping me. We have an excellent relationship, so I felt comfortable just coming out and telling her that I felt it was because she's not doing anything to help herself (as she's diabetic too, along with a host of other problems) and that perhaps she's jealous that I'm trying to change, as we both used food to make each other feel better and to show our love.

She's doing better, when she does leave something, it's homemade and she's taking the nutrition into consideration for my sake, by experimenting with lowering the calories or carbs or sodium. I know she does it as a way to express her love, and I totally get it, but that doesn't mean I have to eat it, so I don't (most times :bigsmile: , she's a hell of a baker and I ain't turning down her apple dumplings ). I know she wants a grandchild as much as I want to give her one, so I recruited her to help me out. When we go out now she points out more healthy items on a menu, and will ask for suggestions for herself.

Most of my coworkers know I'm working towards a goal and have been excellent supporters. My husband is also great :smooched:

I keep reading this trying to decide if the author is serious. I really don't see people in my life offering me food, or expressing concern, or asking me to skip a workout as them being out to get me. Nor do I think that anyone else really cares enough about my eating and fitness plan that it would make them feel bad about themselves or that they do feel bad about themselves and their choices. Maybe I just lucked out in the friends and family department.

This. My world seems to lack the totes jelly haterz that everyone else complains about.

Yup.

Except for my husband who brought home delicious Chinese food last night. But only because he wanted it. I'm a big girl and can choose to not stuff my face.

I read an heavy lifting site and they had this gem of a story today. Thought I would share:

http://www.t-nation.com/powerful-words/action-offends-the-inactive


You're not imagining it. When you decide to better yourself, you'll be immediately surrounded by people trying to stop you. Action, it seems, offends the inactive.

They'll usually be subtle about it. Offering you foods that work against your nutrition plan, often presented as gifts or treats. Expressing false worry about your supplement usage, your food choices, and the number of days you go to the gym. They'll find plausible reasons for you to cheat on your diet or skip a workout. They'll encourage you to be discouraged. They'll even get mad at you for how your positive choices are affecting their lives.

If anger doesn't work, they'll bribe, they'll mock, and they'll carefully plant seeds of negativity. All because you've decided to be better, to be more.

It's the story of the crabs in the bucket. Put a bunch of crabs in a bucket and some will try to crawl out and avoid becoming dinner. The rest won't try to escape, but they'll reach up and pull the others down.

When you set a new goal, physical or otherwise, you have unintentionally pointed out other people's weaknesses. Their faults and shortcomings. Their inability to plan and lack of desire to express one iota of willpower. They sit around and want. You have royally pissed them off by doing.

Piss them off anyway. Offend them anyway. Crawl out of the bucket and find new friends and better relationships.

Remember, action offends the inactive. And that's their problem, not yours.

Or, more likely, people are used to having a relationship with you that consists of certain activities, interactions, and routines, and when you change that, they resist.

If you change your routine to sitting around smoking crack they will probably also (sabotage!) offer to do something other than smoke crack and probably (jealous) make fun of you for it too.

interesting. saving to read later

I have to say... this article bugs me. I mean, I totally get what the author is saying, but I disagree with a LOT of it.

You're not imagining it. When you decide to better yourself, you'll be immediately surrounded by people trying to stop you. Action, it seems, offends the inactive.

They'll usually be subtle about it. Offering you foods that work against your nutrition plan, often presented as gifts or treats. Expressing false worry about your supplement usage, your food choices, and the number of days you go to the gym. They'll find plausible reasons for you to cheat on your diet or skip a workout. They'll encourage you to be discouraged. They'll even get mad at you for how your positive choices are affecting their lives.

If anger doesn't work, they'll bribe, they'll mock, and they'll carefully plant seeds of negativity. All because you've decided to be better, to be more.

The line here that REALLY bugs me is this "All because you've decided to be better, to be more.

WTF? just because you choose a healthy lifestyle for yourself DOES NOT MEAN that you are BETTER THAN or MORE THAN those who have not. Their value does not lessen because you make a positive change in your life. No more than your value lessens when a friend decides to get a university degree that you don't have. Or take a class in something you don't know. It's not ABOUT better / more.

It's the story of the crabs in the bucket. Put a bunch of crabs in a bucket and some will try to crawl out and avoid becoming dinner. The rest won't try to escape, but they'll reach up and pull the others down.

When you set a new goal, physical or otherwise, you have unintentionally pointed out other people's weaknesses. Their faults and shortcomings. Their inability to plan and lack of desire to express one iota of willpower. They sit around and want. You have royally pissed them off by doing.

High horse much? Your fitness goals point to YOUR success and your victory over YOUR weakness.. NOT someone else's! If you approach your health from this perspective, no WONDER people hate you. You are bettering yourself. And only yourself. And what is YOUR priority is YOURS alone, and is no better than anyone else. Just because my mom doesn't work out, it doesn't mean she has shortcomings. It means she has differing priorities... and at her stage in life, I understand her prioirities.

If anything, those who bristle and 'sabotage' may feel insecure. They may FEEL less important, but if you don't RUB YOUR SUCCESS in their faces, they will overcome that.

Piss them off anyway. Offend them anyway. Crawl out of the bucket and find new friends and better relationships.

Remember, action offends the inactive. And that's their problem, not yours.

Yeah... let's just step over all those in our lives who are struggling. Lets walk all over them and show them how inferior they are to us with our magnificent bodies and amazing fitness levels.


NO!

Rather... do YOU and love those who do THEM. People get mad at Christians when they "shove Jesus down other people's throats", yeah, well how different is it when Fitness freaks go and start shoving calorie counting down our family and friend's throats.

There's a right way to share your beliefs and a wrong way. (in both areas).

I'd say... Be sensitive, be empathic, be encouraging. And quit being obnoxiou about it.

Live a healthy life, and those who want one will see, and will ask when they are ready for it.

I think it's more 'action (and other personal choice that doesn't have any impact on others' lives whatsoever) offends *kitten*'.

I definitely know some of these *kitten*. Many of them are my family. Many of them are people I don't even know.

Recently I've become mostly inactive from a fitness standpoint. You all can be active around my couch potato self as much as you want, and I won't try to stop you. But super active people are offended by my choice to not work out all the time. Low fat people attack my low carb lifestyle and try to temp me with carbs. My vegan 'friend' makes jabs at me for my choice to eat meat whenever he can.

People just think their way is right for everyone, and it's their job to prove it. Just do what you do. The lion doesn't care what others think of him.

TL;DR:

If everyone focuses more on themselves and their own choices instead of on others and their choices, whether those choices are active or inactive, the world would be a much better place.

Yeah, I have also never seen this. "Active" is pretty normal amount my friends, coworkers, etc.


Being in Colorado kicks *kitten*.

Their reactions and lack of support have more to do with them than us. When you start to do things to better yourself, you shine a light on how others can better themselves. Some see the light as motivation and encouragement and seek the same path. Others, who have no desire nor belief that they can improve their situation, see that light shining on their own flaws and want to shut it down.